NARRATIVE ONE
FREEDOM QUESTION
Is it okay to want to rent a place in the same state where my parents and siblings live? Yes, my intention for desiring this is for my freedom. Freedom from clutter, filt and foul smell. Best believe that I have tried to keep things clean and proper.
I invest a good amount of my time to clean thoroughly, but its like my people have a thing with order. I clean the kitchen and give it an hour or two, we are back to square one.
I hire professional cleaners to clean my parents' bathroom and a day after, its already stinking badly like a public latrine. Whoever told them that flushing after peeing really did then a big disservice. That would have have been the fate of my own bathroom, but I figured before hand and its always under locks. As it is now, my only sane place is my room.
I leave my room and I an greeted by all sorts of smell. I cook, but I cannot eat from it because everything irritates me. I am f*** tired. If I decide to rent my own space would this be tagged a bad move? I cannot keep staying here until I lose my mind. For someone with OCD, this feels like hell to me. HELPPPPPP!!!!!!
You can but make sure it is very far from them otherwise it would be the same thing........In the beginning don't let them know where you stay first...
You can but make sure it is very far from them otherwise it would be the same thing........In the beginning don't let them know where you stay first...
Abeg I am irritated.
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NARRATIVE TWO
NOSEY NEIGHBOUR
Good day everyone.
Something is bothering me. I stopped greeting my elderly neighbor cos of what he said to me. We've been TTC for 3 YEARS now.
I Am in my late 30s and this man stopped me on my way back from church and told me to go And adopt a child that i am too old to bear children. He said That my hubby is young and can get someone else pregnant and I will be a lonely old woman.
Mind you I don't discuss anything with him, just good morning and I move. I was so hurt I cried for days. Since then I stopped greeting him to avoid insult. Now I feel bad every time I walk pass him but I don't intend to greet him. This old man gossips about everyone in our block of flat. A lot of people don't talk to him.
*He may have been drunk to have the audacity to approach you and talk such nonsense...
*He may have been drunk to have the audacity to approach you and talk such nonsense...
Please continue greeting him and leave God to use his (the mans) foolishness to confirm his word in your life...
You will laugh last by Gods grace!
@Posternumber1,go rent your own place and save yourself the dang stress
ReplyDelete@Posternumber2,Stay away from such an insensitive and nosey neighbour mbok
@1,go rent your own place but not that far from them...
Delete@2,Please continue greeting him, GOD want to do somethings beyond human imagination..Sarah, Rebekah and Rachel are three women in Genesis who experience similar issue...don't worry..GOD want to bring a great man into dis world through you...please invite us when it happens...
Poster one. Pls go get ur place! But not close to them oo. if not dem go still come live with u nd nothing will change! Pack to a place dat before dem pay transport reach der! Their body go don tire dem🤣🤣🤣
DeletePoster 2. abeg ignore d old man. Just greet him nd pass but next time he try to talk down on you. Give him serious warning.
Dont feel bad for not greeting him, infact upp it to no looking at him... if that's too easy, increase it by not noticing his presence.
ReplyDelete@1,go rent your own place but not that far from them...
Delete@2,Please continue greeting him, GOD want to do somethings beyond human imagination..Sarah, Rebekah and Rachel are three women in Genesis who experience similar issue...don't worry..GOD want to bring a great man into dis world through you...please invite us when it happens...
Poster 1, rent an apartment that is very far from your family, and whenever they visit you. Let them know about your house rules, as you cannot make a law and it stands in your Pop's house.
DeletePoster2, Take it from a woman that looked for a child for 8years.
Greet him, but go in your closet and talk to your Maker.
Remove grudge and stress from your mind.
It got to an extent that a woman boldly worked up to me and said"l believe it is you that have not given birth" in a shop that l came to buy something in my street.
They gossip at my back about my childlessness, to the extent a man was talking trash that God blessed me through his prayers.
I believe a miracle is coming your way soon.
Keep your distance from him.
The place l worked as a manager before starting my office. The woman was insulted by her neighbour, calling the husband an "impotent",within two months, she became pregnant. She has 5 kids now.
Always see a reason in every statement to your life condition to praise Him.
God will surely work something out.
If l can be a mother after doctor's diagnosis on Hormonal Imbalance, there is no one that God cannot bless.
1. Do what makes you happen and sane, but don't forget God in the midst of your OCD.
Delete2. Madam keep greeting him and don't hold grudges against him. He just told you what some people are saying, but don't let it weigh you down, be focus and keep trusting God. God will answer you and those seeking for the fruits of the womb. Amen.
OP 1 - Do what you must to live in a clean sane environment.
ReplyDeleteOP 2 - He’s projecting his own ‘pre-imposed conclusion’ on you and your husband. Make peace with yourself and greet him, God will make him eat those words he uttered. Just believe! 🙏🏼
Poster one this your people dooorty na follow come. Despite everything you are doing to clean the place it will still be a pig house. You are free to move out far from them and also when you move out, if they want to come, they have to inform you. You hold the yam and knife but I will beg you to do what you are doing for them by paying for cleaners to help your parents. God Almighty bless you as you do this Amen.
ReplyDeletePoster two no be everything you go cry. The man telling you is just reminding God about you. Just tell Baba God it is you that old man is talking to not me.
Don't allow anyone to make you cry. Continue greeting him. Greetings is not love, just your obligations to respect.
Sorry, no mind baba old man, since you know how he is, just ignore his nonsense.
It is well with you all
How dare you call poster's House a pig House. You are such a horrible person. God will continue to expose you.
DeleteWhy are Africans like this,abi should i say Nigerians! You marry, problem, you never marry hian, you marry you never born,wahala, you born girl,you no born boy ,nsogbu,ogini nu o
ReplyDeletePeople are like that generally. Not just Nigerians. It's just that abroad, people are trained to have a filter n be considerate when talking to others
Delete1Rent your place but far from your people
ReplyDelete2. Madam, God will answer you shortly and stop feeling bad. You must forgive but you don’t have to relate with him. He’s not wise
If not greeting him is going to keep you sane, please , ignore his existence... I have someone like that in my neighborhood...
ReplyDeleteIf not greeting him is going to keep you sane, please ignore his existence. People should learn to mind their business.. I have one like that in my neighborhood.
ReplyDeletePlease rent your place and keep distance... poster 2 don't listen to what men say .. God hasn't written you off from his list.. men are not God...keep hope alive..e hugs to you all
ReplyDeleteSecond Poster, Nigerians are the most insensitive people on earth. I have a child and i have been shamed for having just one. Imagine, pastor asking the whole church to pray for me to get pregnant again. I never went to him privately for any prayers to have more children. I have always wished for 1 or 2 children at most. I just look at people when they make annoying comment about me. " What are you waiting for", your child is old enough to have another sibling", yenyenyen. Myself and husband gives them their feedbacks at times with commment like " Did we ever complain to about about having difficulties in childbearing", Are you going to help us pay school fees when we have another one since our case is important to you".....Now, nobody ask me stupid questions or advises me on what to do to have more kids.Stop giving counsel to people without being asked. It is very rude especially if you are not relatives.
ReplyDeletekids.Stop giving counsel to people without being asked. 👌👌
DeleteThose people are projecting their own lack onto others. It helps them feel better about their own problems.. My mum has this friend whose daughter got married recently n seeing as her daughter is younger than me, she visited to remind me of how age is not on my side n I should do n marry. That even her own daughter that is my junior is married n resting in husband's house. Strangely enough, she said all this after her daughter had a miscarriage n is struggling to conceive . The daughter even rushed to marry the guy out of pressure from this same mother of hers.
DeleteAs a result the guy is not the best husband n they are patching him up.
.So I just excused her, because she also knows the pain of waiting for God's timing in life n must be desperately searching for ways to make herself feel better about her daughter's issues. I avoid her when I can tho because I don't need pressure or a constant reminder of what I know is already coming n is on its way to me. I just know when it happens it will be so marvelous, shame doubters n it will make sense why I had to wait. What's certain doesn't need to be rushed. And the longer the wait, the better and more magnificent the results as long as ur praying n doing the mental work to attract the best to you.
Poster 1,yes please,rent if you can afford it
ReplyDeletePoster 2,Very very soon,God will answer your prayers, please start greeting him
Poster1: I think for your sanity you should move out and do not make it known why you are doing so, because family can be really strong with opinions and can make you look insane for doing what you want to do. Just use something as an excuse to move away.
ReplyDeletePoster2: As yoruba's do say 'o ran olorun leti ni'(he is reminding God). Take your pleas to God as you've always been doing.Some of this things are inevitable,people will talk regardless, offending you might not be his intention. Continue to greet him and don't engage him in discussions than your normal Good morning. I pray your crying turns to smiling real soon. God bless you.
Poster 1: Get out of that pigsty already! Who wan vex make e vex. Nature and destiny won't allow you choose your relatives BUT you can choose where you live and whom you'd like to live with. Get your own place ASAP before you lose your mind.
ReplyDeleteAnd when they visit, let them be restricted to the sitting room and visitors' toilet. Lock your kitchen and buy them only soft drinks in PET bottles when they come. However, if you can't afford an apartment with a separate toilet, don't let them visit at all and let them know why. No hide mouth o. Tell them "I no want make una use una doti and bad smell kill my spirit na im make I run before I crase." Shey na that kain house you go one day invite fiancé(e) and in-laws go? Hian! The Lord is your muscle o.
Poster 2: You go fear fear na! Na wetin see-finish for compound or area dey cause be that. The reason you are debating this greeting matter sef is because you let him get away with the insult/affront. Person wey you for lock him shirt or agbada for neck shout for him head make he talk as he take know say e get person wey no go born pikin. Ogbonge coven chairman for street!😠.
You sure say he no follow get hand for the situation sef? Your husband should warn him too. And you, any day you greet that agbaya again ehn! Mtscheeew. This one no be malice o. Na "mind your lane" dem dey call am. If to say your face no dey ground too much, one coven grandpa no go gather liver dey follow you yarn okpata for compound. Die it!
Person wey you for lock him shirt or agbada for neck shout for him head make he talk as he take know say e get person wey no go born pikin. 😂😂😂😂
DeleteLoll. Really it is see finish n too much regard for people that don't deserve that makes them so comfortable with silly remarks. Ever since I stopped greeting this woman that asked me when I will marry, she respects her self. I'm not as warm to her as before. Sometimes your self respect needs to come above regard for other people once they start messing up. You teach people how to treat you.
DeleteChronicle 2, nawa for that man, the audacity, I would have told him politely too that God's time is best and then walk out on him. Dear poster, cry no more for the Lord your God have answered your prayers.
ReplyDeletePoster 1
ReplyDeleteHow are old are you? Because living alone isn't as easy as it seems. For you to really enjoy it, you must be ready to part with a fortune. Else, you'd be going from frying pan to fire. You can't leave your family home and go stay in face-me-I-face-you. You go see helele. The dirt you are running away from will meet up with you big time. Plus ndi ara you will meet. At least, in your home, you are privileged not to share amenities.
To live good, you need to live in high brow areas or at least decent environment. Check your transport, feeding, rent, light, water, miscellaneous, etc. You'll no longer have those free. Safety too should be considered. You need some level of street smartness to live alone.
If you think you can shoulder all these with ease and still have money left for investment and the rainy days, why not? Forget whatever they tag it.
By the way, aren't these the parents you grew up with? How come you suddenly developed OCD? Just asking.
Poster 2
Please don't greet him abeg. Just make sure you don't harbour any grudge in you. If he greets you, respond but don't go smiling at him. If opportunities arise whereby he needs help, gladly do so. He's the spokesperson of the devil. He actually conveyed what Satan is planning for you. So get praying seriously.
Greeting him doesn't necessarily mean you like him. Keep a very long distance abeg you. So that he'll stop all his demonic prophecies. Na from clap e go take enter dance if you continue to dey greet am. No be everybody go be ya friend. Never permit negative energy around you. You'll carry your children.
"Never permit negative energy around you" Nice one.. also never accept what other people are saying to you or about you when u don't like it or don't desire it for yourself. Poster, that man tried to profess something bad into your life. Luckily for you, noone has the right to profess anything to your life that YOU don't personally want or allow. Take ownership, REJECT IT fervently and block it out. Refuse to accept it as your truth and reality. YOU have the power to create your reality thru your thoughts, prayers, mindset, self belief and assuming the position of someone who has what they want already.
DeleteYou want to be a mother, so that means you deserve to be a mother. Even the bible says in Proverbs 23:7 "As a man thinketh, so he is". Assume the mindset and thoughts of someone who is ALREADY is a mother and who is sure she is destined to be a mother and it will be your truth and come to pass. It must be reflected back to you if you really believe it true.
"Never permit negative energy around you" Nice one.. also never accept what other people are saying to you or about you when u don't like it or don't desire it for yourself. Poster, that man tried to profess something bad into your life. Luckily for you, noone has the right to profess anything to your life that YOU don't personally want or allow. Take ownership, REJECT IT fervently and block it out. Refuse to accept it as your truth and reality. YOU have the power to create your reality thru your thoughts, prayers, mindset, self belief and assuming the position of someone who has what they want already.
DeleteYou want to be a mother, so that means you deserve to be a mother. Even the bible says in Proverbs 23:7 "As a man thinketh, so he is". Assume the mindset and thoughts of someone who is ALREADY is a mother and who is sure she is destined to be a mother and it will be your truth and come to pass. It must be reflected back to you if you really believe it true. Also stop saying you're TTC, cus ur further creating the problem and accepting the problems as yours n creating a cycle of doubt and constant trying. Instead say "I am someone future mother. My baby is coming any day now. I am pregnant any day now. It is done"
Also poster pls stop saying you're TTC, cus ur further creating the problem and accepting the problems as yours n creating a cycle of doubt and constant trying. Instead say "I am someone future mother. My baby is coming any day now. I am pregnant any day now. It is done" And it will have no choice but to come to pass.
DeletePoster1 please move before you turn to a nag.
ReplyDeletePoster2 that which people have turn to a form of mockery will bring you laughter that those who see you will rejoice with you..
I don't think the second poster's neighbor is nosey I feel he cares but his caring came out in a nosey way. We all know how Nigerian men are it takes the grace of God to find a good,matured and loyal one..btw,I don't who made it mandatory that as soon as you get married start popping kids! That's the mindset disturbing us.
ReplyDeleteSaying she can no longer bear kids is far from being caring. Is he God?
DeleteNigerians (people) should learn to mind their business and stop dishing unsolicited advice. What's it to him whether or not she's 'old'?
If you care about somebody's situation, pray in the corner of your room. God will reward you openly. If you have solution, offer only IF YOU ARE ASKED!. Anything short of that is being nosy and meddlesome
Your veins are popping Rhod.
DeleteYes you can rent and live in the same state with them but veeerrryyy far that they'll have to think thrice before visiting you
ReplyDeletePoster 2 it's not a must to greet your neighbours nah, abi
Poster 2 for ur own sanity just act like he does t exist,cos I feel if u keep greeting him he will come another day with another silly advice,ignoring him will show him that’s u don’t need him or any form of communication in ur space.Dont worry God will use the mockery to give u a testimony.dont loose hope,
ReplyDeletePoster 1 u can move but let it be far away from their place,and for now they don’t have to know the place is urs,just tell them u squatting with a friend during d week cos it’s closer to work,and can only come see them on weekends,very soon they will get used to not seeing u everytime.but don’t stop doing the little u can for them as regards cleaning.goodluck!
Poster 1: Pele. As someone with a small level of OCD I can relate to your frustration. If the city you're considering is big enough, rent there but some distance from them. You'll be fine
ReplyDeletePoster 2: Let the hurt go please. He just displayed his ignorance and foolishness. Turn your pain to prayer and release him from your mind so you don't sin against God. Once you forgive him, it won't be difficult to greet him. May God look down upon you with mercy and bless your home with wonderful children.
Poster 1.....rent a place so far from them.
ReplyDeletePoster 2....protect yourself at all costs. If that means not greeting him, by all means walk past him. Nonsense
Salutation is not love
ReplyDeleteGreet and pass.
May your testimony be read here next year.
Poster I swear I can relate,I live with my ..... Who doesn't give a hoot about hygiene, I am irritated to go into my bathroom, when she everywhere is in sham,if I complain she looks at me as if I am crazy, I am doing my best to cut her visit short,I can't deal abeg,I am not OCD but I like a clean environment.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 ewwwwwwwww
ReplyDeletePoster 2 may God answer your prayer soon
ReplyDeletePoster 1, ur case reminds me of my younger brother. But his own was because my dad was a monitoring spirit. He just came home and told us he got a place. The day he invited us over, he took us through a convoluted path. Me wey no dey know road before. I never went there again till he left the country. Neither my parents. Him leg no dey far from house before. Apo resettlement to lokogoma. My father came back and told momsie he rented a bird house. Nobody kuma ask am. Pls leave for ur own sanity sake. And don't tell them until u got ur place. Don't tell them ur plans. They will get the world and its brother to dissuade you.
ReplyDeletePoster 1
ReplyDeleteIf you are working, say your company is giving housing allowance i.e paying directly to the landlord and you are going to take it because it will be removed from your salary whether you like it or not. That way, you can leave peacefully without your family thinking it’s a deliberate act.