Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Saturday In House Gist - Adopting A Child Versus IVF And Surrogacy Versus Waiting On God

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Saturday, September 18, 2021

Saturday In House Gist - Adopting A Child Versus IVF And Surrogacy Versus Waiting On God

 Having A Child/Children is the best thing that can happen to anyone/ couple but for some, the Journey is not/was not so easy....



Is it not better to Adopt a child while waiting for God's time? Or for the IVF to work out? Is Surrogacy also not a better choice than waiting?

This is easier asked than in Reality as men will not hear of Adoption or Surrogacy and say they have no money for IVF..... The woman is sometimes in these situations left with all the burden...

I know someone who walked out of her Marriage after a long time of trying to conceive .The man refused Adoption and Surrogacy but all the IVF kept failing.
She walked out and adopted a child and now has peace of mind and growing with the child..
The man is begging to make up but says he cannot take care of someone else' child.


Are you a couple trying to conceive? what is your status?
Are you planning on adopting or you already have?
Are you planning on IVF and Surrogacy? Or are you eggs not weak? Weak sperm?
Are you both just tired and decided to wait on God?

Are both of you singing the same tune? 

This post be like a painful reminder for some trying to conceive but trust me that reading others peoples stories, brings some form of comfort...

Let's gist.

67 comments:

  1. Adopting is fine, less stress to me. To all in God's waiting room, the Lord will visit you soonest.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Less stress? Have you seen anyone that adopted in Nigeria? Go and ask them how stressful it was

      Delete
    2. Adoption is good. I want to adopt two in the future but the husbandman is strictly against it. I pray, l make my own money to be able to do it.

      Delete
    3. We have decided to adopt and it was his suggestion. I would have tried ivf but I've got some health issues so I feel it maybe risky carrying pregnancy coupled with my age. I'm all for adoption.

      Delete
    4. 16.15 you are a wise woman. I have seen many go through ivf despite having health issues and never lived to see the child. You will see women above 45, obese, diabetic, hypertensive, yet they lied to themselves in the name of faith and go ahead with ivf process. Na by force? Your husband too also loves you. God bless you and make the adoption process and motherhood easy for you. Amen...

      Delete
    5. The easier option would have been adoption, but the adoption process is costly, one of the reasons I think most don't try crossing that line.
      Surrogacy is another good option, but both genders atimes can be overly dramatic about it. And sometimes the issue of motherhood by the surrogate, also complicates things. The surrogate can be managed anyway but adoption process needs to be less expensive - and naija factor can be killing.

      To all, those going through fertility issues, I pray God wipes away your tears with your testimonies.

      Delete
    6. Thanks @MsSaphire and God bless.

      Delete
  2. Anyone wey God hands no dey no go work.It's a gift from God...Just saying.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ClichΓ©! As if anything including your own life, if God did not say yes, you won't live. We are trying to have some serious discussion here.

      Delete
  3. May God come through for all those waiting on him

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am 50 and would like surrogacy but don't know an authentic and not too expensive place for surrogacy in Nigeria. Trying to get a surrogate mother outside Nigeria where I live has been impossible and the agencies here are very expensive

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can help out. But you go pay me. Like we can have a deal. And youll get ur baby. Im in nigeria though

      Delete
  5. A man (of lady) who does not like to hear "adoption" is a very selfish man. The Lord gave me kids, miscarried one due to my own mistakes.
    I adopted one and will likely go for another. The adopted one is the oldest and first child in the family. The rest do not even
    know that she is adopted and we like it that way. She has every right any of my kids have; she is the "big sister."
    They know that if they dare disobey her, they will see my wrath. She does not know any other mama but me and my husband is
    the only daddy she knows. Above all, we teach them the Word of God; the Bible. She leads the Bible study when it is her turn and
    sings very well; very obedient and looks after her sisters like her life depends on it. I do not have a maid right now. I can
    leave all my kids in the house, if I like for days and have a sound concentration in anything I do. This life, when lived according
    to God's Word can be enjoyable and simple. Luke 6:38 "Give and It shall be given you, good measures, pressed down and running over..."
    If you give an orphan care, you and your kids will receive abundant care 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁

    ReplyDelete
  6. You can do all and still wait on God. Abraham had ismeal while waiting on God.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And see how that turned out for the entire world

      Delete
    2. Totally agree with it was Abraham's impatience that brought the wahala we are in ,patience is key

      Delete
  7. I personally prefer surrogacy abeg.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too. But our Nigerian people will believe on has issues with her womb and Will use it to mock me. The CS pains I passed through while giving birth to my first child 8 yrs ago still lives in my brain

      Delete
  8. I think it's better to adopt while waiting on God. All the best to ttc couple.

    ReplyDelete
  9. When I come into money.I plan on adopting twins.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am TTC and planning to try IUI or IVF first. still saving up for any of them. I am fertile according to all the test results but my hubby has sperm issues. so before thinking of Adoption, I will try IUI or IVF first because I really want to experience pregnancy and child birth. please God open financial doors for me soonest

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's better you save of ivf, that iui when the man has sperm issues is waste of time & money. I've been through it. Wish you all the best.

      Delete
  11. The process of adoption in Nigeria is very tiring and discouraging.

    For me, if money is available, I will go for IVF.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Depending on your contact. I adopted a beautiful baby boy in February this year and got one for a colleague too. I work with closely with orphanages and social welfare departments in my state so I get to jump the queue whenever I indicate interest

      Delete
    2. So if person no get connection e no go fit adopt.

      In lagos state it takes forever that is why baby factory business is gaining grounds.

      My friend applied for adoption and the process was taking too long. She got a surrogate and the surrogate already gave birth before she got feedback from lagos state.

      The best is just surrogacy. If you want a cheaper means, get your own surrogate if you don't mind.

      Delete
  12. Both are beautiful options. Both options come from God.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Adoption is one of the easiest ways to have a child/children. But Nigerian government has made it an uphill task if not an impossibility. The price is high. Imagine baby boys now go for 2-3 million naira while baby girls go for 1.5 and above.

    Surrogacy hasn't been fully accepted in this part of the world. So only the brave minded can venture into it while disregarding side comments of mockery.

    For IVF, hmmnnn. Na dia you go know weda God dey ya side. You can spend all the millions countless times without success.

    Bottom line is, ask God for children before using any method so as to be successful. Only him gives children.

    God bless every expectant bv with children in Jesus name. Amen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You mean one will pay to adopt a child? Wow!!!

      Delete
  14. If i have money i will like to adopt, do surrogacy or ivf ahbegi.iam baby hungry

    ReplyDelete
  15. Still waiting on God, but planning and saving towards IVF. Very sensitive topic and a painful reminder of my baby i lost at 36weeks due to pre enclampsia some years ago. Thank God for life.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you my beautiful people. God bless you.

      Delete
    2. May ur heart desires be met, but you see, u need to watch d evil comments that drop from you, other people are someones child too, if u cant say anything good to, or about someone, just stay silent. Ask for forgiveness from all thoes uve hurt subconsciously.

      Delete
  16. We are in the process of adopting a baby girl. I have been TTC for the last 6 yrs to complete my family size . I am tired. TTC Is so draining, been struggling with secondary infertility.
    Oh! If I feel this way,I don't want to imagine the pain of women trying for a first child.
    We have 2 boys. My husband is 100% supportive because,I have been an emotional wreck .
    I will be 41yrs next month, prayerfully waiting for my baby girl

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have 2 babies, boys, and you are emotionally drained for a 3rd/ a girl?

      Delete
    2. Na your ungratful heart dey drain you. Its ok to desire whst we want, but youve been blessed, yet youre draining urself and causing more drain for the wanting hearts reading this. Damn

      Delete
    3. Na your ungratful heart dey drain you. Its ok to desire whst we want, but youve been blessed, yet youre draining urself and causing more drain for the wanting hearts reading this. Damn

      Delete
  17. I am currently scouting for a surrogate, if you will accept 1.5m as payment, mail stella, I will get in touch with her. I will take care of all pregnancy expenses. The amount being called in the fertility hospital is very very high. Fertility journey has drained us, physically, emotionally and FINANCIALLY. it has almost turned us to paupers, I just want to use a surrogate and rest but the fees, OMG!!! Please Jeweluchi, I will send you a mail incase anyone mails you for that purpose. WE ARE TIRED

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. By surrogacy are you looking for carrier or carrier plus egg donor

      Delete
    2. Just carrier, I still have frozen eggs

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    3. I can do it for 2million for 1 baby.

      Delete
  18. God is the giver of children,most times people have tried ivf and It ends up unsuccessful,whichever one u choose go to God in prayers first.baby dust to all mothers ttc.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Angel eyes sorry dear, the lord is your strength. I think these our Nigerian men are not making things easy for some women because of some cultural believes and religion fanatics they would rather prefer their women to wait forever on God than going for Ivf, adoption or surrogacy (of which even God is not against) and in the process of waiting she is subject to all sorts of humiliation, ridicules and so on. may God have mercy on Nigerian women

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At the root minus sugarcoating is selfishness and ignorance by such men

      It runs very deep in them

      Education doesn't cure it
      It

      Delete
    2. Thank you @Neat cut & designs.

      Delete
  20. My wife had fibroids operation yes back and had her womb removed because of the size of the fibroids which stretched the walls of her womb. Doctors said her womb can't afford to carry baby. She was in much pain every day before the operation.

    It was a painful decision but better alive than never. We are managing the happiness we have while waiting on the Lord for money to do surrogacy. It's not easy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Look for a woman go impregnate, and bring the child home, its cheaper like that, don't wait forever,time waits for no one

      Delete
    2. @anonymous 18:24 if the man was impotent, would you suggest the wife do this? Don’t be stupid

      Delete
    3. Thank you for being such a supportive husband. God will surely answer your prayers.

      Delete
    4. @ anon: 17:56
      God bless you.
      You are good.

      Delete
    5. Hmm,it is well with your soul,may God come through for you

      Delete
    6. Anon 18:24.... how could you? How do you type such when you dont know the mental and emotional state of this man and his wife. That comment up there is cold. We all see what is going on with Tubaba you want to add this. You sincerely think going out to have children and bringing them back is easy. Dont say such again. That's wickedness

      Delete
  21. Dont mind this 18:24. God will come through for you. Just trust him.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Which woman would give him the child after delivery except it's surrogate

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in ehn. Some people just think with their homevideo sense.

      Go and impregnate a woman outside and bring d child home. Na wa

      Delete
  23. After two failed ivf cycles, my husband and i have agreed to adopt a baby girl but the money and processes is discouraging. Once we are able to save up, we will adopt while we still keep trusting God. This TTC journey has so drained every aspect of our lives. It's a PAINFUL experience that I don't wish on anyone.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I was shocked when a Nigerian pastor in the UK was discouraging adoption and insinuating it's a lack of faith in God. People that adopt are the real deal because the effort and stress of looking after one's biological child is not easy at all and I honestly think most people do it because of biology. To put in the same level of care, love and attention is laudable. The only thing I don't like about adoption is that most times when the children are grown and learn of their origins they have this desire to look for their biological parents which I think is ungrateful but now I'm realising it's not about gratitude but wanting to know of one's origins.

    I think we should embrace these 3 alternatives to parenthood because naija is one kind, I've seen people condemn IVF, adoption and surrogacy and shockingly these same people are firm advocates for trying outside, go and test another woman and other kind of nonsense.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hmmm I don't want to talk about my own challenges

    ReplyDelete

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