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Wednesday, April 20, 2022

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

 Hmmm....





STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSED


Please i need real advice and not curses.

My ex best friends ex boyfriend has been asking me out and I want to know if its OK to date him.

I am not getting any younger and i see prospects of settling down with him if we date. He said he broke up with my best friend because she was sleeping with his rich friend that she met through him but my friend told me she broke up with him because he slept with another of her friend that i know.....

My ex best friend and I decided to go our separate ways after she told her other friends something really private that i confided in her, she was not sorry about it and she told me that i did not tell her not to tell anyone even though it was obvious i was pouring out my heart to someone i thought was my friend.

They turned me into a laughing stock and i walked... This is not me taking revenge, it is me making decisions about my life.

I have not told him what she told me but i am thinking of either just going ahead to try my luck with him or going to ask that friend of my ex best friend if she really slept with him to know who is lying...

I am also scared of what people will say when i start dating him, although he assured me that once he returns to America and our relationship works out he will marry me and take me with him....


Should i give it a shot? I am 42 and he is the same age, not married but almost did to my ex best friend.. he also has a daughter and i am OK with that...

Should i go ahead? I need someone to encourage me to do this.... They broke up two years ago and she is still single and 43.



Oh WOW, this wont be easy if you dont have tough skin but you know what? Give it your best shot, and ignore any talks...

You can keep it on the low if you decide to date him!

Some people say friends exes are a no go area so some people might bash you here.. You decide!

79 comments:

  1. You really need to ask yourself if this is the kind of life you want..why settling for your ex former boyfriend for God's sake? You are not even Interested of your well being and the various allegations.

    Let me remind you, Your Age shouldn't make you to settle for the less. All you need now is to make sure you are doing well for yourself before delving into any relationship..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Dozzybest lol where is the less she's settling for? Haven't you ever dated someone's ex?

      Delete
    2. Youth is transient. Go out there and have fun with any single man that is capable of making you blush and laugh out loud even if it is for one weekend. At 42, sis you should be wiser to know what matters.

      Lemmi give you a hint;
      When you date someone fun for the fun of it, you glow. That glow is very attractive such that even if this particular relationship does not work, another will find you.

      Delete
    3. Is your decision to make,his statement doesn't sit well he will marry you when he returns to America if the relationship work well,sis this guy want to have sex with you to get back to your ex best friend period.

      Delete
    4. I love me some Saphire too.

      Delete
    5. Ms Sapphire, your advice on a matters like this makes wanna give you a tight hug always.

      You're so real and mature. I like.🤗🤗🤗

      Delete
    6. Let’s even take your best friend out of the picture, you don’t seem to be marrying him for loves sake but simply because you are getting old. Don’t you think that’s a wrong reason to be getting married?

      Well, you are an adult so do whatever pleases you

      Delete
    7. ☺️☺️☺️ Thanks dears.

      Delete
    8. Poster, go ahead and give him a chance.

      Delete
    9. All these sleeping sleepers sleeping around, sleeping everywhere. Na wa ooo.

      Poster to me, it doesn't sound like he has committed to anything. Don't rush in giving all of you based on words. It will pain you if things don't pan out. Marriage is serious business. Can you trust this man? Do you really love him? Does he love you? Is he free? Does he cheat? Does he take care of you? Don't get carried away just yet. You have many questions that you need answered before you go ahead. Except you are not aiming for forever. Good luck ����

      Delete
  2. Is it about trying your luck or because you need a man in your life at all cost? Try to find out the truth about what your former friend told you about him, most people dont change, if he cheated on your best friend with her friend, he will do same with you. But if you dont mind about him teaching on you, you can give him a try. But make sure you dont fall into his hands if all he wants is to get into your pants and then travel back leaving you waiting for him and may never return. He might even be married in America. You can also try your luck else where than put all your hope on him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Who said her ex friend might not be lying about the cheating matter? So she can believe her ex friend and not the man?

      A friend that can't keep secrets can as well lied to cover up her deceit...

      Delete
  3. Eweeeeeehhh!

    Give it a shot. He may just wanna chew a clique of friends before going back or he may not. Too much sleeping with friends of friends around is going on in that clique.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Give it a shot keh? The guy is not real joor. He will chop cookie and ghost you immediately he returns back to base. Forget about him and be INTENTIONAL about finding a guy(as in ANOTHER guy). Wardrobe, going out, online dating and prayers. Don't EVER get desperate. You will be fine.

      Delete
  4. Go for it, keep it on the downlow, no sex and dont tell him anything bad about his ex or whatever she's told you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No sex? A 42 year old has needs. If he leaves after sex, it's not a loss for her. She will age faster without good sex. The least attractive and unpleasant women to be around are the sex starved ones.

      So yes. She needs SEX.

      Delete
    2. That's an absolute lie. Nobody dies from not having sex nor age age faster or are unpleasant. Why did you get your stats from? Tweh!!

      Delete
    3. Lolll what kind of trash are you spewing???? Age faster without good sex???? The utter balderdash many of you confidently vomit ehn, please use your gindi how ever you wantu, if that makes YOU happy.
      There are many other ways to be happy that you are obviously oblivious of.
      Pity.

      Delete
    4. Sex-starved? Really? Everybody trying to sound cliche online for a 2 minutes act that only benefits men. Just so you know, many married women don't have sex with their husbands after kids. Many women's husbands don't even bother touching them despite being on contraception for years. Are all the women sad? Sex is overrated but it's also an emotional act that can leave you in pains as a woman if you go spreading your legs for every Tom, Dick and Harry looking for satisfaction and happiness that can only come from within you. Poster, all your talks about dating him obviously centres on giving him sex. Asides the sex, why should you be afraid of being friends with him which is actually what you need to have with a man before settling down. Men pretend like they must have sex before marriage making it seem like sexual compatibility needs to be checked. It's a big fat lie! How many of the women they slept with in the past did they marry? A man who loves you and wants to marry you will do so. Except if you don't mind adding to your body count, go ahead and date him, otherwise tell him you prefer to be just friends. What will be will be. Also, I've learnt that people can be dangerous. Do you think your friend will let you be happily married to him? Be careful and don't play with your life. If you tow my advice and remain just friends with him and he ends up marrying you which is most unlikely, please don't ever let your friend find out. Keep it low till you leave the country with him. For your life!

      Delete
    5. "2 minutes acts that only benefit men"?! You are joking, right?!

      Delete
    6. I pity those who listen to Ms Saphire,honestly...

      Delete
    7. Yes! I've dated 12 men! All of them cum within 2 minutes. The second round is always unnecessary pounding of the vjay. One guy cums just at the point of entry so I have enough experience to tell you that. Many women have lost body count. I don't need to become a superior whore to know that. My experience is enough. The truth is that sin will always make you guilty. If you're not having sex within marriage where you tell your husband what you want and how he can gently go about it, you'll always have that deep-seated feeling of sadness. That is why people are now so cold and cruel. Everybody is sharing their sacred bodies with people that have slept with people that have demons. I always leave after a few acts when I start feeling guilty until the next person comes around and sways me. May God forgive me for the ones I did. Never again!

      Delete
    8. Ms S I’m sorry but you talk nonsense sometimes.

      I’m 35 years old and I have not had sex in 10 years. I have a 10 year old child. I’m beautiful and young that people don’t believe my age and people think my child is my younger sibling and NO I am not bitter or sex starved. IDGAF about sex. I’m making my money and cashing out while avoiding naija men who only want to share and use your glory. Yes I know who I am and what I carry so I keep my legs closed for my husband who I will be marrying later this year. No sex till after we are married!

      Drops mic

      Delete
    9. 17:36 WISDOM!
      18:57 @your 1st sentence MANY TIMES.

      Delete
    10. @Saphire
      "Age faster" and go to heaven or be young like a baby and go to hell, which is better?

      Delete
    11. 18.10 honestly! Most times, I just jump and pass.

      Delete
  5. 🤣🤣🤣 poster which kind of class 2 question is this, you are not serious. If you like him, date him already. Seat him down and have a mature conversation with him. Let him know what your ex friend told you caused their break up and watch out for his body language.
    See if it's me, I will so date him but not be quick to give him the cookie jar until I'm sure. You are 42 not 22, you shouldn't be concerned about everything people say about you. Moreover you and the lady are no more friends.

    ReplyDelete
  6. For me, this is a NO! The guy is just frolicking about knowing how vulnerable you guys are with your desperation to settle down. He's of no good intention but if you're sex starve, you can give it a shot!! Have fun while you're busy searching for Mr. Right. Goodluck!!!.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Well, you are no longer friends with her,so you may give it a shot.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Forget what Humans will say, BUT be particular about what GOD will say. Pray about it, do your due diligence by finding out from that other girl, albeit codedly without spilling the beans.

    And then make your decision. As Stella said, no noise, no social media flaunting etc..

    Please PRAY. VERY IMPORTANT!

    I wish you happiness, joy and fulfilment 😘😘

    ReplyDelete
  9. When I get to the America part I lost interest in your story,may God help you poster.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, that information isn't important....

      Delete
  10. My dear you have mentioned your age like a hundred times.
    We get it.
    You think you are old and your options have run out.
    Before you marry this man ,investigate o, you are marrying a baby daddy and e no go easy.
    Before you marry

    ReplyDelete
  11. I won't sha. I can not be comfortable dating my ex friend ex. No. I won't

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too, I dont pray to be in her position.

      Delete
  12. My dear please be sure he is not on some kind of revenge mission to pain his ex, please don't let desperation make you make a mistake.

    Please pray and ask a lot of questions.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Go ahead. What folks and public will say has killed so many and slowed destiny and career. You have nothing to lose. Those that will advise the opposite here won't even ask questions how much more seek advise before they dive in.

    Try your luck.

    Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Talk for yourself only pls. People like me will never be seen close to this kind of situation. Once it's over between you any my friend who introduced you to me. I have nothing to to do with you again except greetings. There are friendship codes for some of us

      Delete
  14. Evil ex friend. Reason I don’t keep any.he will chop you too clean mouth. He’s using you to get back at his ex for dumping his cheating ass

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You may be unto something here. Who knows his real motivation. It fascinates me how men can easily rope women into these things. The very things that would be tabboo for them, they will try to pull you into with them, then when things go left they tell you that they didn't force you into anything.

      I'd prefer go on vigil, fasting, wearing of sackcloth, pleading and begging on the mercies of God than to go this route, but desperation is a strong motivator in this world.

      Delete
  15. Mai dear 🤗 do what gives you peace ☮️🕊️. Forget about "what will they say" because whether you do good or bad, people will still talk.
    E kwucha m!

    ReplyDelete
  16. A) Take to America
    B) Ex-Boyfriend to "Ex-friend"
    C) Age not on your side

    Which is the issue? Or is it because you heard option A?

    If you can't ignore people's opinion;Dont start this relationship cos no how "they" won't believe you are the one he cheated on back then;cos the table will be turned on you..

    Also if after all these while the only eligible bachelor you know is "An Ex" of "Your Ex friend";you need to leave your comfort zone;Make new friends and also network with a new circle..

    I believe in boundaries and mutual respect;I don't want to know who was right or wrong so I won't date or marry an Ex of a friend when there are options out there;but you aren't me so do what gives you peace..

    @MARTINS

    ReplyDelete
  17. Date him abeg. YOLO ✌🏾

    ReplyDelete
  18. Better go with the flow... See at 42yrs abi whatever nothing come out o... Better join the moving train and make your own story. Rita Dominic settled for what is a available. For the the glam and all. I am sure she had to breathe down the neck of the poor man to make the wedding happen. It is for her.. not for him. All he needs to do is appear and be present on the D day. I am glad he understood the assignment. Rita wey be correct babe wey done run things with correct men. When it finally dawned on her. She had to lie low and make the most of what is available. Think no more just act. Love you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear Rita Dominic did not 'SETTLE', she waited until she found the best for her.

      If she had listened to the smelly, empty headed comments from roaches, she would have picked who ever was 'available ' and may probably have been divorced like so many of her colleagues.

      The audacity to say 'settle', empty headed lout. Trust me there are still a few women who are not settle.

      I understand that you cannot relate.

      Delete
    2. Hmmmmm...as if marriage makes people happy. Please stop making people desperate. This man will most likely never marry her.

      Delete
    3. You need to rediscover yourself. Don't settle for less. There are more to life

      Delete
    4. 15.30 get some honey and leave Rita alone.

      Delete
  19. Hmmmmmm! Sweetie, DO YOU!!! YOu can’t live your life based on what others will say. Put yourself first for once. Just do your research, find out if he dated the other friend too.
    Sure, people will talk but then eventually they will move on. More risqué things have happened in this life. It’s all about your attitude.
    Two years is a long time besides you are not friends anymore. Just make sure the guy is not a player or using you to get at her. Goodluck dear. I’m rooting for you.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Do not give it a shot. Is he the only man around?

    ReplyDelete
  21. Once I read up to the "marry me and take me to America..." I just knew that this matter was settled in your heart.
    And that last line; "I need someone to encourage me in this,"
    Nne, this sounds like your mind is made up. You did not tell us anything about this man (or even asking him if he slept
    with the other girl, you made up your mind to incriminate the lady immediately! 😮)
    Nothing about his man's character, occupation, temperament etc. The lure here is to "get married and go to America?"
    Okay, to help you make up your mind,
    Supposing this same man is a Nigerian graduate that is working in a firm in Lagos and earning like 100k a month (which is
    a huge chunk of salary for a starter Nigerian graduate) what will you have done?
    And above all, what is the place of God; the Savior in this whole matter of marriage which he instituted?

    ReplyDelete
  22. I wouldn't go there. I personally don't like dipping in the same pool my relatives and friends have been in. I like clear and firm boundaries in my life. There are just too many ppl on the planet today to even have to consider this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Funny in a case like this, all her friends have probably changed anyway
      So there’s already a boundary

      Delete
    2. God bless you. He finished sleeping with her ex friend and want to start sleeping with her

      Delete
  23. Marry him
    Check out the story well and marry him if it’s true
    Instead of hiding why not just let people know on your own terms

    ReplyDelete
  24. If you're not comfortable with it, DON'T DO IT.

    Also, you know your ex best friend. 2as she the kind of person to do what the man claimed she did? If you know in your heart of hearts that she's not, then DON'T.

    If she is that kind of person, since you're no longer friends, you MAY go ahead. But do your homework and don't be carried away by US migration possibility and age issue. I'm concerned thr man may want to date you to spite his ex or not trust you because he believes birds of the same feathers flock together, meaning you may become unfaithful to him like your friend

    ReplyDelete
  25. "I need someone to encourage me to do this...." Really?
    Wow! Sorry I won't be taking this your ride
    How did this man have this girl child?
    How promiscuous is he and what his his character frame?
    What does he do for a living and hasn't he married in America and is looking for
    a Nigerian branch of a wife?
    Please do not just jump in. Do your investigations. and it you are a Christian, seek the Spirit of Jesus to
    guide you. And if you are not, why not?

    ReplyDelete
  26. I can't, I won't...

    ReplyDelete
  27. Dear poster, What exactly do you want gan gan deep inside your heart, forget about what people will say and follow your heart ❤️

    ReplyDelete
  28. No stress in this jare...

    If you see future in him then go ahead but don't forget to be prepared for war but if truly he is meant for you, God will fight for you.

    ReplyDelete
  29. See you, see mumu! So at 42, with a world of over 9billion people, you cannot find your own husband outside a network of mental people. Rita Dominic is marrying today at 50! Fred Amata's sister is married at 64. Please go find yourself a neutral guy to date. Leave left overs alone. This man has slept with 2 people you know and you want to shook head there. Is not like you are ignorant o!!! You reek of low self esteem. Please focus on yourself now and remove yourself from that toxic network!!! Shalom

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well said,poster your man will you, don't be a number

      Delete
  30. Is that really what you want? Age is a number, Rita Dominic is happly married at 46, so calm down Beautiful Woman and follow your heart.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I dont know nut the taking of me to America seems to be what is hungrying you.
    Are you sure he will?
    Are you sure he doesn't have someone over there?
    So he slept with your friend, slept with your friends friend...well if you are okay with passed around left overs...

    Also, hmmmm, some men will marry and uoh will never smell that America that is hungrying you. You will be right here in Ikere Eketi till retirement.

    Also be sure that his hooking up with you is not a form of toxic payback to his ex.

    ReplyDelete
  32. If I were you, I would not date this man, you truly don't need all of this drama.... but alas the ball is in your court!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Date him on a low key,and if it turns out fine,good for you,but make sure you enjoy yourself to the fullest ,don't be too pushy,and expect less

    ReplyDelete
  34. Pls do go ahead and come and tell us how he dumped you and told your ex friend and how that also tell other friends and they starts making mockery of you for a second time @ no wisdom at 42 yrs because of gbola

    ReplyDelete
  35. Ms Saphire
    I always look forward for your comments. Are you single? I love you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Joroooooooo 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

      Delete
  36. Initially, my thoughts were go ahead. why not? They broke up 2 years ago.
    But, when I think deeper, I think proceed with caution. This guy is probably a player. All that talk of taking to 🇺🇸 might simply be talk. Make your enquiries. Your friend probably told you the truth about their reasons for break up.
    Shine your eyes. I’m not saying don’t date him. I’m saying proceed with caution, cause he might have ulterior motives.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Try your luck babe,keep it low,you can't kill yourself, enjoy the relationship please.

    ReplyDelete
  38. So you want to marry a guy that has slept with 2 of your friends? Don’t you know he’s a dog? Marry kor marry ni the guy knows sense will be far from you due to your age hence the lies

    ReplyDelete
  39. Why are you desperate for marriage

    ReplyDelete
  40. God's time is the best, Rita Dominic got married at 46

    ReplyDelete

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