Hmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MARRIED TO A LIAR
Many are saying they can divorce cos of you Know it's hard to divorce just cos of lies... My husband is a liar and a manipulator, I have forgiven without him apologising uncountable times he lies to the extent I took a loan from my mum, then he told me that the land he bought was two and I can give the other to my mum to pay the debt .
I can't begin to type all the lies, please how do I handle him? I have four kids, I can't talk about divorce for now .
We've been keeping malice for 3weeks, that malice is another thing but I haven't talked to him cos I'm tired of making peace..
I'm loosing it.
You have four kids? Did he just start lying or he started since and you thought he would change?
You are not handling it well by keeping malice, talk to him when you have to please...
Divorce because he lies? What if he had cheated? Madam, na lie he dey lie, he no cheat or abuse you domestically, joke aside, the best you can do is ignore him even if he tells the truth. With time, he will get to see that he is no longer taken seriously.
ReplyDeleteSome beating and cheating are far better than lies. Anyone that lies recklessly to his spouse can do anything. Imagine living with someone his good morning sounds like atomic bomb.
DeleteA liar is likely to cheat and lie to escape. But if a man is not beating or cheating on a woman, his lies are tolerable by miles than beating. All the woman needs do is to stop believing him AND make it known to him he is not being believed. Since nobody lies 100%, the man may get worn out by the 100% disbelief and make some adjustments.
DeleteHmmmm. Stella mama🙄🙄🙄🙄
ReplyDeleteI can't deal with a liar,maybe you should start keeping things from him,you don't have to be a liar like him,just be discreet.keeping Malice with him wouldn't solve the problem at hand,you're giving him more power and control over you when you don't settle issues immediately because he would come up with another lie or use lie to cover lie,after the malice is over.
ReplyDeleteLie is a deal breaker for me. I can't deal.
DeleteI'm thinking same
DeleteThis chronicle made me remember something that happened with a guy I know. He lies for a living. One day he was lying and someone that knows him reach house was there.
ReplyDeleteImmediately he threw that lie about having multiple lands but documents are far if not him for don sell one or two take sort out some stuff and settle people he was owing. The guy wey sabi am almost slapped his mouth and told him. Guy, so you never change? If you lie for people wey no sabi you, me wey sabi you reach house you want come still lie give? We all laughed it off.
One thing about lie is that, you must have a retentive memory if you don't want to be caught. Again, you need another lie to cover a previous one. It's a circle. Liars hardly change unless God personally touch their heart.
Madam, this one na big cross you carry so ooh. Even the bible say a thief better pass a liar. I wish I can remember that passage.
Hmmm this matter hard o, I join Stella ask you since when did he start lieing ?
ReplyDeleteSince you can't divorce begin to manage as you have been, stay strong
As bad as it sounds, start telling him lies because he won't stop
ReplyDeleteFather and mother lying up and down. What would the kids grow up to become? 🤔
DeleteGood afternoon folks, rain has beaten me so much today! Chai!
DeleteFor the lady with the lying husband, please don't keep malice for the sake of your children. It doesn't look good children seeing their parents keeping malice. It will affect them when they are adults, they will think it is ok. The best thing is for poster to talk to her husband if she feels she cannot deal anymore , then she should pull out from the marriage. Before it turns to hate and intolerance.
I lies so much and keep malice alot yet you gave birth to four solid children. If you know that you can financially take care of your four children by yourself then divorce him so you can have peace and rest of mind otherwise, stay and manage him like that and pray that he change.
ReplyDeleteDidn't you notice this habit during your dating days or you thought you could change him or you could cope?
ReplyDeleteKeep talking to him. Also, keep your financial concerns away from him before he puts you in heavy debt.
You know him better, just play smart and wise with him and get him to continue taking care of his responsibility while you support in anyway you can but don't forget to save for when it's needed.
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing you can do about him lying, just be praying for him to change and also avoid keeping malice with him.
ReplyDeleteHe's a lion.
ReplyDelete😆🤣
You two keeping malice isn't gonna solve nada.
It be nice you two talk o
When 2 liars are in the home, trouble trouble o, trouble trouble o.
ReplyDeleteBe focus and ignore him, try and avoid anything that will trigger him to lie.
Don’t avoid him. But don’t trust him either.
Delete1. Always have a plan B and C for everything.
2. Don’t confide important stuff to him.
3. Find ways to confirm anything of importance to you.e.g call your kids school to confirm , whenever he tells you he just paid fees.
4. Never lend him money
5. Secretly Save save save. So that your kids and you don’t get stripped one day. Cos your husband is reckless and can use your house to borrow stupid loans for instance
Based on your chronicle, @17:16 is your answer.
DeleteMarital issue is a big problem , your husband lying is not something you just knee, he has being lying before you married him but you overlook it . To me is a cross you have to carry , it is only a genuine encounter with Christ that can deliver him, I will advise you keep on praying him from your hearth and pray for grace to love him
ReplyDeleteI understand how u feel poster!
ReplyDeleteI can’t stand when u can’t trust someone especially a spouse, I will advice u talk to him
Maybe it’s hereditary! He can’t do anything about it except prayers
Take him for deliverance
Teach your kids the importance of sincerity because they may think it’s normal to lie
God bless ur home
Merryment
Please my darling, there's a reason why we're assign to different people in life.... it's to help them overcome some habit, to help bring the best in them,to elevate them....help that man in the way you can....next time he lies,look into his eye tell him you know he is lying and him telling the truth matters.no perfect man on Earth without helping them.
ReplyDeletePls poster,u can't be tired of making peace.there must be room for communication in marriages.talk to your man,tell him how u feel and never get tired of forgiving.pray for your hubby as well
ReplyDeleteA liar and a manipulator. This one pass me. Lemme read other people's advice.
ReplyDeletemadam need to start ignoring him maybe that will help and stop asking him on necessary questions because it will bring lies upon lies let me just be doing whatever you want to do shikina everybody is happy.
ReplyDeleteUna can born sha. E use lie pregnant you four times as well?
ReplyDeleteOnce you know someone lies, stop dealing with them based on their word
ReplyDeleteIf he says he bought two plots, go check it to make sure they are in his name
If he says lend me money, I’ll return m. Say no
If he says I’ll throw party for you, hold your own money in your hand cause he probably doesn’t have
Don’t rely on a liar
poster you said you cannot divorce him meaning you have accepted to stick to him even when he tell fat fat lies. So why are you here to ask us how you should handle him.
ReplyDeleteWe don't know what to tell you, since you enjoy answering MRS to such a man please continue with your full chest. Just know that he cannot and will never change except God touch him.
Please do correct try fasting for 70 days so that he can change. Na you marry liar, na you no gree leave am, na you say you don tire for him character. Now you dey look for who go tell you to stay or leave. Abeg make you shift.
You said it all👏🏾👏🏾
DeleteMadam I will have said you should call him a lier consistently in the presence of his children but that will not be fair on the children. That man will NEVER change. The only way he can change is when he hear his own children softly call him a lier. Daddy is a chronic lier🤣🤣. Daddy I don't believe you because you always lie🙄. As you no wan divorce him, Learn to weigh any word that comes from him.
ReplyDeleteI’m actually petty enough to agree with this.
Delete*liar
DeleteLol, I was just about to type... Anon the corrector food dan land. Then boom. 😂😂😂
DeleteObi for president
Wizkid FC
Proudly TIV
If I was the one, I'd play the I don't care card, I'd not stick my neck on the line for him because I've can't be trusted. Dealing with a lying spouse is a whole lot o, I can imagine your plight
ReplyDeleteLies that destroys marriages. Don't ever believe anything he says until you see changes. Don't give him anything anymore until he changes. ABI him be APC member?
ReplyDeleteLiar and manipulator that you had an orgasm for and gave birth 4 times through the lies. Abeg continue.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahaha. You're a funny person. She should continue to endure or better still start her own.
Delete😂😂😂😂🤣 whattt did you just say @ Blackberry
DeleteIt is not always that you can tell that someone is a chronic liar. I was married to one, who effectively covered this trait with "christianese" until years into the marriage. Incidentally, I detest lies because trust is very important to me.
ReplyDeleteBut in some instances, you can tell from the get-go. Dated a guy, he lied to me a few times, and I cut him off immediately. Maybe my detective antenna heightened because of my previous marriage and I don't trust stupidly anymore.
@Poster, I really don't have any advice for you. Only you know your breaking point and what will work for you.
So it's safe to say he deceived you to marry him, because the lies didn't start today.
ReplyDeleteI would rather not blame anybody for what happened to me. I have learned to take responsibility for my life. I should have been less trusting and more suspicious of human beings.
DeleteMadam start praying for your children. Imagine they inherit it from your hubby? Chai! May God never let those kids inherit lying from your husband.
ReplyDeleteYou have 4 children.
ReplyDelete4.
In this economy.
Were the lies growing as each child was coming?
There's something my parents used to drum in our ears growing up " a liar is thief "
And I say a thief is a potential murderer.
It only takes one small thing to deadening your conscience, and you're gone.
You can pray from now till Rapture, a HUSBAND who does not want to change, can NEVER change.
Me o, I would say save your energy and pray for your self, that even in that union you still find reasons to be happy.
And also pray most importantly for your children that they do not imbibe that dirty characteristic and more.
Thanks everyone for your advice and scolding, I didn't know he was a lier until after marriage that I discovered his trait, I was naive cos I got married early story for another day, as for my kids is like is every day we fight and quarrel cos I forgv easily.. I thank God for this misunderstanding cos my eyes open to some certain things such as finances... Thanks Stella ma'am
ReplyDeleteLying is a very serious matter. I feel your pain lady. For this lady to,bring this here is a testament to that . Anyone who lies can do any manner of evil or wrong doing. Not sure why people are trivialising this . How can you plan your life, raise children with a liar. Imagine not being able to trust your spouse. It is betrayal on so many levels. I pray the poster get peace and wisdom to deal with her husband. You may need to discount whatever he says and cry to God for the redemption of your husband. And one other thing my dear Naija people please let us respond with empathy when someone in emotional pain comes out to ask for advice. Blaming and shaming is not the way to go
ReplyDeleteLying for me to discover over and over again is something else for me. Because you will completely kill the love, trust and all.
ReplyDeleteSome people seem to lie without knowing or are actually forgetful. Find a coping mechanism please
ReplyDelete