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Monday, January 22, 2024

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

 Hmmmm.....


STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MARRYING AN OLDER PERSON

I am a single guy and not married, am a young man in my late thirties and I am attracted to older women, since I was young…
Many people around, are complaining about it..
Even when am growing up, I dated ladies older than me, not sugar mummy ooooooo…
I will love to marry a mature woman and I hope i am thinking right and i am doing the right thing, .
My sisters are complaining that something is wrong that I should go for counselling…
I don’t know if is normal?
Is it bad to marry a woman older than you?
What should I do?
SDK, I really need your help…
Stella I really need your pen….

The reason for this chronicle, is because there is a lady that both of us are just friends for more than 10 years, we discuss almost everything’s about ourselves, and she is the closest lady to me,
I am planning on setting down this year, the only lady, that comes to my mind is her, and I discussed it with my sisters that I will be introducing her to my parents by next month, my sister told me, that they will not come to my wedding if I marry her, that she is too old for me


There is nothing wrong with Marrying an older person at all..If younger Ladies can marry an older man, then younger men can also marry older women...There is totally nothing wrong with it.
Dont mind your sisters, there is nothing wroung with you and you do not need counselling of any kind...

70 comments:

  1. There is nothing wrong with you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. E get one man for my village same thing with you, he married a woman older than him he gave him two sons, finally she died of diabetes, he went to remarry and still opted for another older womanπŸ˜‚ nah that time we knew the wahala nah follow come so dear do you the world will adjust

      Delete
    2. Something must have prompted your preference knowingly or unknowingly. It is not just that you fell in love with an older lady and do not have an eye for another person. It is your preference of older ladies. Are you the last born? Did you grow up with your mother? Did you get little or too much motherly love? Do you like to be pampered and cared for? Most ladies who go for older men do that because the love the 'fatherly' care they get from such men who treat them as their daughters. A lady in ur age group or younger than you might need all the care, petting, long romantic texts and messages while these older ladies are the ones making sure you are good. Ask yourself these questions;
      1.Why are my attracted to older ladies and not this lady only?
      2. Women age faster than men, will I still love her 15 yrs from today?
      3. Everyone needs emotional care, do I equally care for these women or I only enjoy their 'motherly' care and love?
      4. Can I withstand a marriage without the acceptance of my family or am I matured enough to prove to my family that love is all the matters.

      If you can answer all these questions and play out the scenarios few years from now, go ahead and marry your wife and prove to yourself that love is all that matters. I wish you the best.

      Delete
  2. The heart wants what it wants...Since you like them older without ulterior motives, then go for it...It is great that you know what you want...

    Shine ya eyes oh...Make sure your decision is with strategic alignment. Odimkpa!!

    All the best...

    ReplyDelete
  3. You didn’t state the age difference between you two.
    If she’s older with about 5 years, it’s okay but anything more than that, do not go ahead with it before you marry one that will be flogging you like a baby 🧐

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have seen older women married younger men and they are happily married. Peter okoye and Lola, Stan Nze and Blessing, they are living their lives.
      Why age is main concern is because of child bearing,. As in the chances there.
      Though pregnancy you can't really tell how or when it will enter.

      Delete
    2. I have seen older women married younger men and they are happily married. Peter okoye and Lola, Stan Nze and Blessing, they are living their lives.
      Why age is main concern is because of child bearing,. As in the chances there.
      Though pregnancy you can't really tell how or when it will enter.

      Delete
    3. You people will say there’s nothing with till the person is your brother..bro you don’t need anyone’s opinion,do what makes you happy and sleep well.

      Delete
    4. She is older than me with 6 years and few months and she is in her forties,
      Her birthday is coming up by May and I will love to fix our wedding on her birthday, if we are going to marry....

      Delete
    5. I think there is nothing wrong with getting married to an older lady, the question is do you want children and what is her take on that.

      Delete
    6. Poster pls do what makes you happy.6 years is not a lot and if I was In your shoes,I won’t leave someone that ticks my boxes and makes me happy because she’s 6 years older than me.

      Delete
    7. If she loves you and wants to marry you please go ahead and marry her on her Birthday and may God bless your union forever!

      Delete
    8. Six years isn't too much, it's appropriate.

      Delete
    9. If you want kids, can she still have kids or has she hit menopause? Are you open to adopt without going to knock up a younger lady outside your marriage?

      It sounds as though you are only getting married because of the pressure to marry. Your choice is also because she is the one available, not because you deeply care for her.

      Are you ready to share your space, your time, resources etc. with someone else 24/7?

      Abeg remain single. When you are ready, you will not need to send chronicle to know if you should proceed or not.

      Delete
    10. 6 years is not a lot at all. In this age of ours, do what makes you happy. Life is proving too short with each passing day.

      Delete
  4. I think it's the African mentality; they believe men shouldn't marry women who are older than them, especially if the age gap is wide. If you are very comfortable with her and you can absolutely assure her that you will not bow to family pressure in case the need arises, please go ahead. Please marry the person you love.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't think it is wrong to marry older woman..since the both of you love each other nothing bad there.like they said Age is just number..

    ReplyDelete
  6. There's absolutely nothing wrong with your choice, personally i love older guys, and i will definitely settle down with one
    Our choices in Life varies,we are different and built differently....Go for who, and what you want,as long as you are not hurting anyone in the process, you are good to go
    I wish you the best of luck 🀞

    ReplyDelete
  7. Uncle the decision is yours to make and I mean only yours. I hate it when people feel they know what is good for another person. If your family likes they should not attend your wedding. There is nothing wrong with your preference. My uncle married an older lady and she has given him peace. He has grown faster than his mates because she was a blessing to him. Their first child just got into Uni. What your sister said is rubbish. If an older lady is what you fancy, by all means go ahead a 1000% and anybody way no wan gree should go sit in a corner. Your sister herself needs to see a counselor to talk her out of her backward mindset.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Your choice your problem I think maybe your sisters taught she may have reached menopause since it doesn't show for face but you can talk to them that it is your business

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This one go just open mouth waaaaa! No courtesy. No punctuations. Nothing!
      Just always talking to people abi bashing people anyhow, like your life is super perfect.

      Delete
  9. Possibilities of she bearing children are lower, bro. Forget the sweet things they will tell you on this blog. They will suggest IVF, surrogacy and adoption, fine. What happens when it can be done naturally, all things being equal?

    Cases of women above 50 giving birth are rife but why do fasting and prayer when you can get it effortlessly? I'm not bad mouthing older women or younger women yet to conceive but natural laws are natural laws.

    They will advice you marry your heart, marry for love but won't tell you the other side of their advice.

    Women age faster than men so, imagine how she's going to look in 10 years from now since she's older than you.

    No one should mis understand this comment as it's coming from a balanced side of the coin.

    I loved older women. Dated them. Married my age mate, so I'm well positioned telling you to go for a younger woman. Long term is the view. If you were, say, 31 and she, 35, it won't be that challenging but being in your late 30s and she older than you, have a re think.

    May the Lord grant you the wisdom to make a good judgement.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. do not listen to this person. If the older lady you want to marry was his unmarried sister he will switch sides. He has written all these from a biased mind. Did he tell you the lady was in her 50s? and who told you he has not thought about her looks? Go for your younger ladies if that is your preference but let other people who do not like the same things you do breath.

      Delete
    2. You're age mate will still age faster than you. You should have married a girl younger than you by 8years. Just saying, based on your comment. Life is nor set in stone, younger people do ivf too.

      Delete
    3. Points well made.
      Especially as from personal knowledge.

      Poster should have given his age and the age of the woman.

      However, all you said may not apply. None may apply. But you have forewarned Poster. Expectedly, he is now forearmed

      Delete
    4. And if he married younger and doesn’t like her and still no child nko. What will you say then

      Delete
    5. " Woman age faster than men!!....How did you get this your fact!?
      What changes there body is child bearing.
      If not both men and women age according to their age.my thought.

      Delete
    6. WINNER, YES I AM!22 January 2024 at 16:50

      You said the truth up there, anon. Assuming the poster is in his early thirties, going for an older lady who's 2 to 3 years older wouldn't have mattered. But you are in your late thirties while she'll be in her forties. Well, I pray God gives you wisdom profitable to direct

      Delete
    7. yea dogalmighty.

      Delete
    8. Chika(hello iya boys)22 January 2024 at 20:25

      Look at you..
      This child birth of a thing is just by God's grace ooo

      Nah God dey give pinkin

      Delete
    9. Lol, @17:05 I saw what you did

      Delete
  10. What is your sisters business with your choice??
    Even if they want to show concern, what should bother them is ,if the lady you have in mind is good enough for you.
    Family consent, religion, tribalism, , and what again ??? It's always there to tear love apart, why is It so!?
    Grown adults should know what is good for them.
    what I can't take i won't suggest for you to do so cos we have choice.
    Just follow your heart.

    ReplyDelete
  11. You have a right to marry whom you deem fit as you are the one to live with the person and not your sisters.

    Please be willing to defend, protect and stand with whoever you want to marry. This is important if you must have a peaceful home. Think am well, abeg.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sir please do whatever makes you happy, forget your family they will adjust with time.

    ReplyDelete
  13. How old are you and old is your intended? As long as she is not older than your parents then you should be on safe ground? Is she still within the capacity to safely give birth? Do you want to be a father someday? These are things that you have to settle before getting married to an older woman. If she cannot give birth, is she ok with surrogacy? If she already has children, are you fine being a stepfather right away.

    If you are properly prepared for the realities of marrying someone older than you and have worked out bigger issues then go right on ahead. I don’t know if this woman is like only 5 yrs older or 20 yrs older. So fertility and her already being a mother may not be an issue if she is only a few years older. Someone I know is 5 years older than her husband and they are a decade in marriage now.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Every choice is valid....... Narrative always changes with people like you.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I wish you stated her age, it would have help in my response but be that as it may, I find nothing wrong in marrying an older woman provided she is still within the age bracket of conceiving. Unless you wouldn't mind for an adoption.

    I have dated older women in the past. They have their good and bad side but then, when it comes to love, they're great lovers.

    If she truly loves you and you're convince she's the one, then go ahead and convince your siblings to see reasons with you.

    But one mistake you shouldn't make is to go against your family over this. You need their support at all time. Don't ever agree or believe what anyone says to you to do it yourself if your family aren't in support of your plans.

    I believe no family will wish their own bad.


    © TEEJAY

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for this, others are telling him to ignore his family, brother this are the only people you will see when the ships are down.

      Delete
    2. How I value peace of mind eeh, never wish to go where or enter a place where there is no peace .
      It's between you and your wife.
      Let God bless you with enough resources and good health to carry on.
      Everyone is important but don't really matter in certain things.
      Your choice and happiness is for you.

      Delete
    3. Lol if only family approved marriages worked we won’t have some marriages today
      Family that will praise you for going against them when they see the marriage working

      Delete
    4. Teejay is right in a way. Find a landing ground for you and your sisters. Try to bring them to your corner

      Delete
  16. Bros, you brought this type of matter here and you think you will get sound advice?! Better sample this your question with Men. Different strong men (young, old and those you know married older women) and hear what they advise you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you over much.

      Group of mostly women commenting will -
      Tell a man not to marry an older woman?
      Help a man truly analyse the challenges of marrying an older woman?
      Tell a man the pros and cons of marrying an older woman?

      See that no older woman married to a younger man has commented of the "good, better, and best" of such a marriage?

      Poster, in addition to seeking out men married to older women, go back and discuss with your sisters and meditate on their real points of dissent.

      If you are still convinced, then go on. It is said "the man heavily decked in a masquerade regalia is told not to fart not because the gods will be angry, but because he alone will smell the fart".

      However, there is one undeniable good fact in marrying an older woman. It is better for an older woman to push her husband's head anyhow because pushing husbands' head as per whim is a wives' right.

      Best wishes.

      Delete
  17. If she ticks almost all your boxes,go ahead,you guys have been friends for 10 years.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Don’t join the marry one and keep thinking about another group
    Marry your choice

    ReplyDelete
  19. In as much as your family input is important, please follow your mind. If you're comfortable with the age difference, so be it. As for me, I can't date a younger guy except I don't know his age. I'll be feeling somehow psychologically and this might make me not to give inmy best in the relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  20. If you're still listening to your sisters dictation before deciding on who to marry, sorry bro you never ripe for marriage.

    ReplyDelete
  21. The choice is yours to make and your choice is valid.

    ReplyDelete
  22. It is sweet to say do not listen to your sisters.

    It a good feeling to do macho and ripeness for marriage by ignoring them.

    The Bible says in the multitude of counsel a plan is established.

    So, before you ignore counsel, do your personal home work well and still your heart to make your choice work.

    A young man sought marriage counsel from his very much experienced Dad. His response was simple. Decide who to marry knowing that as you make your bed so you will lie on it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So do you think the man’s dad would have told him not to marry this lady

      Delete
    2. 22:00
      Read the last paragraph again. The answer is in between the lines.

      Delete
  23. Do what makes you happy but for me is no no no. I can even bring myself to fall in love with someone younger than me . Have worked with some you younger guys and they see me as their big sister bcos they are so close to me like my family.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Poster you could have stated your age range it would have been of great help.firstly is she still at the age bearing range will you accept adoption or other alternative means of having kids, remember as a woman ages her fertility declines will you stand by her in case their is delay or you will run away. Does she love you as much as you love her,will she acknowledge that you are the head of the family and respect you regardless of age,I know a Marriage that packed up because the wife will not respect the husband because she is older. think it through before taking any decision all the best

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chika(hello iya boys)22 January 2024 at 20:20

      6years difference is not much nahhh
      You self you are in you late thirties
      See that Indian Actress lady and Nick Jones
      Abeg go get married
      God Almighty will do the rest
      Don't be surprised ooo pinkin go just dey come like water πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ™πŸ™πŸ™

      Delete
  25. If u are a Muslim just use Khadija and Muhammad as explain. He was older than her and they got married and had children

    ReplyDelete
  26. As far as she respect you as her man, she will not disrespect you, she will not control you, she will not command you or turn you into her house mate please go ahead and marry who your heart ask you to marry.

    Your sisters are saying this cos they are not the one in love with an older person. Please do not forget to share this link with your sisters.

    ReplyDelete
  27. My mom was older than my Dad, and they were married for over 50 yrs. Marriages differ and depend on the 2 individuals,
    1 major thing you should pay attention to is Compatibility.....
    As much as is within you, let your family accept her, Whether you like it or not, your siblings/ family matter a whole lot in our African family settings.
    Wishing you the grace to make the right decision .

    ReplyDelete
  28. The president of France married an older woman. Michele is older than Obama. Think!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Bros, were you molested by an aunty or someone older at your early years?
    If you were, then there's a problem and you need to check yourself.

    For me, I never dated my age mates; I was only attracted to ladies older than me; they were all I fantasized about.

    But I was molested by an Aunt when I was like 5 years old, and later older ladies were always toasting me etc as I grew up...
    Realizing this root, helped me break free from that pattern and I married a lady I'm 7years older than and I don't regret it.

    Note: I generally believe that being attracted to older female/male doesn't mean there's a problem.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Poster, do what makes you happy.
    Age is just numbers not maturity,
    Happiness is found between couple not your family members because they are not going to live with you but the woman you choose.abeg go get your happiness jare .

    ReplyDelete
  31. Poster nothing do you, you are okay, although if I were your sister I would have tried to convince you otherwise. But I won't sweat it.
    As long as you know the lady is good to you and loves you, and certain she will accept your proposal, then go ahead.
    If younger ladies can marry older men then why not??
    Just make sure she is your spec

    ReplyDelete
  32. Nothing wrong with it,as long as you are the man of the house. I use to Reason like you but end up marrying someone younger since I don't really have any older female friend. I don't feel comfortable with 'very' young girls, I feel like I am exploiting there innocent the main reason I prefer matured ladies . Whenever I have the opportunity of having sex rump with older lady; no matter the age, omo! I go bulala am oh! Forget about na your mama age thinking of!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your last line, na talk be this?

      Delete
  33. And reason why some men reason like this, is because of a lot of exposure to adults nakedness ( full or partially), been groomed by older female around them.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Absolutely nothing wrong with it. As long as both of you are happy about it

    ReplyDelete
  35. My opinion ,man was created before the woman .

    ReplyDelete
  36. 6 years is not a lot but baba the lady is already in her forties. Can she still have kids for you?

    ReplyDelete

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