Hmmmmmmmm.....
BETRAYAL....
I am completely and totally heartbroken cos i have found out that the person my husband wants to marry as scond wife is the sidechic he told me he broke up with years back when i caught him red handed....I am devastated!
I am an all girls mum and my husband is desparately in seach of male child..I told him to go ahead and get a baby mama if he wanted and that it was O with me....Some months after we had this talk, he brought up the second wife talk and backed up his reason that if she births him a son and he is not married to her, she may not allow him name him or have control over him...
We agreed on him going to get a wife from the village and he agrreed,...We also agreed that it would be something very quiet and no one would know about it....
I am now finding out that he proposed to the sidechic he said he broke up with and to add salt to injury, she is planning a big wedding with her friend....I saw all this info on facebook.....
She did not advertise the man she is marrying but from the details, she put out, I know it is him.....I picked the date and venue and even went to pay cos i did not want anything done at my home...
I have confronted my husband and he is begging me for forgiveness...I told him to call it off and he refused.
Does it mean he has been dating her all this while and i fell into his plans to wife her?
I am thinking of leaving him but he has been tellin everyone i gave him the goahead to marry a second wife and have no right telling him who to marry...
I need advice cos this has been really disturbing me and giving me sleepless night....
How do i undo this?
Hmmmmmm!!!!.... what am i reading? You gave your husband permission to marry a second wife cos of a mle child instead of gtting a surrogate? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarg na you do yourself oh!
I dont think that you can do anything, please just make sure she does nt move in with you in the same house....
Your husband tricked you indeed!!!..........
Please whatever you do, dont move out!
Please whatever you do, dont move out!
Don't leave for anybody..if at all try and co exist harmoniously and give peace a chance...he actually wanted you to give him the go ahead and now trying to use ot against you...it's well o
ReplyDeleteMen sef what do they want..?
You gave him a chance to go for second wife..hmmmmm.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, he never fell out with his side chick. Both have been together for long and also in love
This is why the second wife issue came up ma.
God will see you through because I don't even know what to type. I understand how you feel though.
Don't forget, she must not move in with you guys, else, they will send you and your children out of that house stylishly.
I wouldn’t be surprised if they already have children together. Don't be surprised if a five year old boy shows up in a month. You want to leave? You better stay and stockpile your pension and your daughters’ inheritance. When son and second wife appear cultural rules going to take over. Stockpile today and leave in a couple years. At the end of the day, you told him to get a wife, so what does it matter if it is someone old or new. And yes, this means they never stopped seeing each other.
ReplyDeleteBe wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove.
This kind of betrayal is really really painful. Kai, I really do not kmow what to say o. I am pained on yiur behalf.
ReplyDeleteSome of these stupid men want ro always be in charge and keep taking and taking, but when you decide to focus on yourself, they won't have it.
Poster, so sorry about this.
I fail to see the betrayal here. OP gave her husband the go ahead to get a second wife. It was not in her power to determine who he chooses.
DeleteMORE importantly!, OP you have no input in the sex of your child. This is basic biological knowledge. If your husband wants a son, he should give you sperm carrying the relevant chromosomes simple! It is what he gave you that you gave birth to.
I would have strong words for your husband but l'd rather not.
Focus on your girls, don't allow the shameless side chic move into your home. Let him rent another property for her.
You supported him to get a second wife.Whoever he wants as wife doesn't matter.
ReplyDeleteSimple! You come dey write chronicle for matter wey you sanction! I don't think you people married legally because what in goodness sake is this in 2026?
DeleteWomen, give yourselves esteem. Now let me ask you, do you think your husband would let you have peace if tables were turned? He would beg on his knees and ask you to cover his shame of being impotent. I doubt you peole are legally married because this is a case for bigamy.
Anyway, na you give am hand, I wonder how you'll instill self-esteem in your girls when you lack it.
I hope you are financially independent sha, na that one I dey after!
This is 2026, people do sex selection ivf.. with high success rate… no guarantee 2nd wife will have boys…..
ReplyDeleteMadam, If you know you are not financially capable of taking care of your children, don't leave that house but make sure you deprive him of everything, your body, food, care etc. Let the new wife take up from where you stop no matter where she lives and try not to feel any emotions at this time. Note that your staying behind is only just for him to raise your children and if you can get hold of any documents of his properties, find a way of changing them to your kids name. Now is time for you to plan and execute your plans with wisdom
ReplyDeleteDear Poster,
ReplyDeleteDon't leave your marriage, what is done is done. You are on the loosing end of you do. Hold your head up high and be strong.
The side chic thinks marriage is easy until she moves in 🤣🤣
You need to find other hobbys to distract yourself because some nights are going to get really cold.
My God!
ReplyDeleteLeave him and find another man
ReplyDeleteThis marriage is for them
You are the outsider
Your husband is a liar
You never gave him permission to marry just anyone
You said pick someone from the village and he agreed
In this age of medical awareness, imagine a husband wanting to marry a second wife simply because he desires a male child.
ReplyDeleteScience has long established that the mother's egg always contributes an X chromosome. It is the father's sperm that contributes either an X or a Y chromosome, determining whether the child will be female (XX) or male (XY). In other words, the sex of the child is determined by the father, not the mother.
So blaming a woman for not giving birth to a son is not only unfair but medically inaccurate.
If a man insists on taking another wife under the guise of "looking for a male child," one has to wonder whether that is the real reason—or merely a convenient excuse to legitimize a relationship he already wants to pursue.
If he chooses to marry the other woman, that's his decision. But if she eventually gives birth to a son, it would be prudent for him to confirm paternity through a DNA test rather than assuming biology worked in his favor simply because the child is male.
It's only in some Nigeria marriages you will see people telling women who are cheated upon not to leave for anybody when the man had already left the marriage by stepping out. I wonder if the men are given same pieces of advice...
ReplyDeletePoster, You would leave eventually, after all people married to cheats always do (and the ones who don't, the cheats eventually leaves them)...but take your time, don't rush. Clear your head and be very wise .
I repeat be smart and take your time.
And you are right, he never stopped seeing her all those years you thought he did. Cheats don't change, they are very sick and hard to cure. If your spouse cheat once just know he or she will cheat forever or you can delude yourself into thinking he or she stopped.
If you find out that you are married to a cheat and luckily you don't have kids yet, once is enough to run from the creature and never look back again but when you have kids leave but not immediately whether you are a man or woman.
It’s because they’re thinking she needs his money to survive
DeleteIf that’s the case, she may have to stay
The deeds been done so pls stay.. it is well..
ReplyDeletewhy will you leave because of her, stay put since no threat or the man is not abusing you. Make sure you have plan B for tomorrow, since you gave him go ahead to marry a second and never mentioned he should not marry his sidechick. Your husband too trick you into his game plan since 19000, just let it be but never trust him blindly again. Allow them do what they want to do as long as it will not affect you, the lady in question want to have a memory to keep for other time, allow her and her friends.
ReplyDeleteI dey wait to read from juju whorstin fans. Nde home breakers! Madam, I hope say you no dey support watermelon, if not pele. Your peace will come, but if you support her, this is just the beginning.
ReplyDeleteYou Have The Mind To Give Your Husband To Go i Ahead To Marry Another Wife Cos Of A Male Child
ReplyDeleteMadam Congratulations..👋
What You See
Please Take Ittttttttttt And Dnt Think Too Much Cos Of HBP
Hello iya Boys
He knows you are not going anywhere;you would only rant and raise thunder but at the end of the day he knows deep down that you are going nowhere;and that exactly is where he got the audacity to want his sidechic as a second wife.
ReplyDeleteThen you made another error;which is accepting to have a co-wife..which means two things;you are not going anywhere and you can compromise your standards to retain your stand as a first wife.
We men are very logical;and everything is well calculated before executed.we know the wife that can take nonsense;and the one who would move on without blinking or crying..
You gave him the go-ahead;he made his choice,just that unfortunately the choice isn’t comfortable for you..but it’s his choice,not yours(harsh but the truth).
Before a man thinks of marrying a second wife;just know you are already an option in his life;so whether you leave or stay;it means nothing to the man.
Hope this helps.
@MARTINS