Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

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Thursday, July 21, 2016

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

Why do some things just happen without explanation?





STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
COLD FEET

Hello gorgeous Stella,where do I start from? How do I go about this In-depth story I am about to share.
For my heart is heavy , and at the same time relieved.

Dear Stella, If not for the word of God that gives strength , reassurance , etc. I really don't know what I would have done to myself.

I don't know where this is going to fit in, but I just need to find courage and know how people who will relate to the story I am about to share , moved on.

It all started 2015, I reconnected with an Ex, who I have known for about 9yrs and dated 2yrs in the past .

We decided to come back together , but this time around to be committed in the relationship. So a year into the relationship , we started marital plans.( Counselling ). Along the line my MIL to be passed on to be with the lord, she blessed me with her wedding ring before passing on.we were so close.( I miss her so much). She usually referred to me as her 'daughter in love' and not daughter in law, she said when there is love , for there is no law.she was an angel in human form. I wish she was still around.

Few months later, the ring was collected back from me,( by FIL).This caused so many drama , I was even labeled wicked and a witch. initially ,
My boo opposed the collection of the ring and that made him drift from his dad as at then.

But I had to restore peace by telling boo to go and make up with them, which he did, even gave him an ultimatum, that I will walk away , if he didn't .so he eventually did.

Few months later, I noticed he was no longer talking about any plans as regards us settling down, but i kept calm , for like 6 months.
I also noticed he chatted frequently with another lady,  she calls him everyday , confronted him. But of course he said there was nothing of the sort I was presumptuous of.

 So  later I decided to just ask him, what the plans were and what we were doing , I just wanted him to at-least say .... Okay lets still give it time , or to tell me reasons why he was stalling.

He eventually said , he was unsure and he thinks he really doesn't know what he wants, that he needs to reassess some third party / external factors. That I should give him a short break....... In that moment I felt relieved that finally, i have made him open up to what the problem was and how he felt. And the same time I was really hurt....

To think a night prior to this confrontation , he didn't sleep in his house... I asked him where he slept , he told me he wasn't going to tell me.
I asked him , if it was the lady I had been suspecting he has something with?  He still said , 'not saying'

But how can all of a sudden you are no longer sure, you kept stringing me along .so if I had not confronted him, is that how he'll just be leading me on??  .
 If you can't be sure now( to think that I had just returned from a month trip ) , when he told me this .
When will you be sure ?

I was even trying to see reasons with him. so I told him , if the break was to reassess your so called ' third party' factors ,That I can understand .
But short break , because you are unsure????!?? Damn it we have known each other for 9 yrs!! Dated 2 yrs before, you were sure, when you approved your mum giving me her wedding ring , starting Counselling ...... And introducing me to your family as the one!

Now , you are no longer sure...

Stella I am trying to move on, to me it's over.

Ps: ( his dad has his reservations about our relationship of which he wasn't willing to tell me what exactly the reservations were, when I confronted him). He kept on saying , that it was nothing to worry about and he would sort it out with his dad.

Pls who can relate with something similar and what did you do?

He recently called , I picked up... And he said he wanted to find out how I was doing ... Like seriously why is it that some men wants to eat their cake and still have it.

I told him , I thought you said you needed a break , why you calling me?

Right now , I'm focusing on God, my job and good friends and I will be traveling a lot just to take my mind off this.


As MAN issue don tire me... I gave it all this time around , see where it landed me.



156 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Heartbreak make people closer to God than their skin... Madam let him go just like others... Yours is on the way.... This one is for someone x

      Delete
    2. Sweet, move on. As in MOVE ON! What kind of phone do you use? If it doesn't have the block icon on a contact drop-down then you need to change it to one that does. Put all his numbers, his dad's numbers, their emails on one contact under his name. And BLOCK. That way no one can reach you. Let him make peace with himself (same goes for his dad). If after a while they start breaking through walls just to get to you, first welcome him with two hot slaps (for he pain) before you hear what he has to say. If he's not serious those slaps will distabilize him and send him parking again. See, never.... I repeat NEVER ask a guy 'what is the issue' twice. If he loves, asking him once is enough to make him sit up. The moment you ask again Na beg you dey beg. Once you notice a drift and you call his attention to it and he doesn't change, errr just close eye and shut down. If he has sense he will act right. Yeye dey smell.

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    3. As for that ring, well.... The woman has gone now so leave it you hear? Maybe when she even gave you her husband didn't agree. So just leave it for them. You loved her and God sees the heart above all else

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    4. That's wat happens wen u taste a bomb pussy at the last minute.

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    5. This is what happens when you date an ex

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    6. Dear Poster,
      We can say all we want, give you all the advise in the world. At the end of the day, it is up to you.
      From experience, I will tell you to move on. If your future in laws have reservations about you or whatsoever, e no dey work. He might love you, but his family will keep coming in the picture.

      I was in a similar situation. Future mother-in-law didn't like me for whatever reason. Never met her before, never had a good conversation with her before. She pressured her son you drop the relationship for a year until he gave in to her pressure. All in all, let me tell you, it's not fun to have in laws that don't fancy you. So, use your head my dear. Life is too short.

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  2. Let it go, he wasn't yours to keep. If you are worried about a ring of sentimental value that wasn't even yours to start with,go into the market and buy one for yourself.
    There is a man out there for you, stop counting the years wasted. God is still in the business of surprises and 9 years of waste can be turned around in months.
    Stop taking his calls and focus on your career as you've said. Chin up!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sorry dear, take heart and never go back to him. Also, when your MIL gave you her wedding ring, what does she said you should do with it? Use it on your own wedding or wear it as an engagement ring from her son? Please enlighten me abeg.

    In other news, today is Nwa Amaka's birthday, where are you bae? Happy birthday to you darling, may your days be long with sound health and wealth




    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "...what does she said you should do with it?" Really? Biko go back to your primary school and ask for tuition refund because they taught you ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

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  4. Hian!...
    Don't tell me this guy is the only guy you have...
    Don't tell me men no dey ask you out!...
    Don't tell me you are ugly and FAT!...
    Move on abeg and stop carrying this guy matter for head!...if you are pretty,you won't have problem hooking up with a correct nigga!...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is not about hooking "correct nigga " is the nigga ready for commitment? Most of these guys are time wasters

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    2. I pray God heals your bitter soul

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    3. sometimes I wonder what u are.

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    4. Queen you are the most stupip bv here. Your comments are as useless as your brain. One day you will be sending your own chronicle and God help you, I will be waiting for your sorry ass with my red ink. Idiot!!!

      Chocolate rose

      Delete
    5. The day you all shall see this thing that calls itself boss of the blog, all you will do is spit. This thing here is just a thing of nought just like ekwensu has been described. Keep living in your stupid illusion.

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  5. My dear, the truth is already what you know. He is seeing someone else and his dad's reservations about you is also a reason.

    Please stop picking his calls cos he is a time waster. Spend time on other things and MOVE ON. He isn't worth you.

    I pray you find love again. All the best.

    ReplyDelete
  6. poster move on with your life and forget about this guy, the guy has finish collecting from you, he now has a new babe that he is collecting from.

    ReplyDelete
  7. @ poster I love ur courage, you must be a very strong lady not throwing urself at him by letting him knows he distancing himself from you really pains you. To me never let him into ur life any more because he is just looking for way to be collecting from you but this guy has moved on already, don't be fooled, probably the family doesn't approve of you any more. And long term relationship isn't even idea at all, ones fault will now be seen and I guess too much see finish will follow. Stay strong ok

    ReplyDelete
  8. The truth is, ur ex wasn't meant for u, that thing that made u guys break up is still there, all d years u guys broke up, u no see another man? Shey he has a woman asides u? Go n get urself a fresh guy or stay celibate. Ur choice!

    ReplyDelete
  9. poster i already like you, pls can we be friends.. i lack friends and i jst moved to lagos.i am female too. pls comment under this if u dnt mind. thx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She need husband not friends.. Go to S&M post and add friends

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    2. @ rich bee, she need friendship now more dan ever, u don't even know if she want to matchmake without people like knowing

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  10. Some guys shaaaa...
    Babe forget him totally biko, he doesn't know what he want.
    Mtcwwwwwwwww.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Congrats emjay, ure startin to get small sense oh, no more struggling to be first?
      You don see say no profit inside... Only loss

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    2. Exactly, my ex was like that, after deceiving me for about a year his true colours started manifesting. I noticed calls to and from different girls, constant chatting on WhatsApp and the marriage talks stopped, constant nagging and complaints, unnecessary arguments, lies, nastiness and malice. I noticed a particular girl from Enugu he obviously met on Facebook, I snooped and confronted him and he was shocked i figured her out her name and denied saying they were just friends and his protege, an orphan he's helping out, i broke up with him and I sent our chats and pictures to her through a third party and of course she and broke up with him instantly. Yeah I had the last laugh Jay, you can't eat your cake and have it, the most petty, deceitful and malicious man I have ever met. Poster some men are really terrible and get easily distracted so next time close your legs and pretend to be a mermaid and don't live with a man you are not married to.

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    3. Lmao
      And what's the loss in being first to comment anonymous?

      Una funny for this blog eh.

      Delete
  11. 9years? Dated 2years? Now see all this drama pooping up na wah oo

    All i can tell you is to move on as well.. God dey.
    But why put all your eggs in kne basket tho.. i tire for some girls sha. Now see this kain huge disappointment chai

    #lesson for the day... just bcos he introduced you to his fam as the one, is not a guarantee! Lets

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    Replies
    1. Every girl mustn't keep 200 penises around them like you do, there's more to life than the number of men you have around you

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  12. Eeeyahhh pele.... take heart.

    You sound hurt and it is understanding. Some men are just so confused but my spirit says he has been talked out of marrying you by his father.
    Its like he has not got a mind of his own and he is unable to stand his own ground with decision making.

    Give him the space he wants, he will come back. But I prefer you use this time to build your esteem and confidence. Love yourself too much, that way you will be respected the way you deserve to be.

    Your boyfriend also has a side chick sha.... ope you know. I can help you if you want...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Help yourself with correct tenses and spellings

      Delete
  13. i like u already poster... can we be friends..i am female. u can reach me on friendzizi@gmail.com...thx

    ReplyDelete
  14. You have taken a good stand, move on and God will smile at you. He is a time waster.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Poster, sorry oh, thats called "Pre wedding jitters, its a normal feeling sha, it happens to quite a number of peeps out there, in most cases it dsnt mean hes not in love with you, its just an inexplicable fear, knowing that youre bout to walk into a huge phase of your life, happens to both bride & groom, but it passes.... dont beat urself up too much, google it and learn more about it, at same time it might be a small red flag that needs to be attended to ASAP, so i believe hes at that point right now, give him the break hes asking for, so he dsnt accuse u of pushing him to leap without looking, happy married life in advance, cheers.

    #DavosSeaworth: Where are their ships?
    Matthos Seaworth: It is wise to attack at night, We took them by surprise.
    DavosSeaworth: Lord Varys knows what you had for breakfast three days ago, there are no surprises here.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Loving ur game of thrones quotes

      Delete
    2. #Melisandre: You should kneel before your brother. He's the Lord's chosen. Born amidst salt and smoke.
      Renly Baratheon: "Born amidst salt and smoke." Is he a ham??...

      Delete
    3. Poster pls don't mind this person o,atheist or whatever he or she call themselves...that relationship is OVER!! Trust me.

      Delete
  16. It is well.. no let man issue tire you oo. Mr right will come soon

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  17. Don't worry if he's yours, then he will definitely comes back. so relax, and enjoy. life is too short to be bordered about a man who doesn't seem to care about you anymore.

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  18. wow some guys sha, my dear short break,long break or even summer break, break na break.Just leave him alone and focus..cos he's not faithful..move on dear sis.

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  19. Just run like hell, when he starts all that indecisive behavior then he has no good plans i have been down that road infact mine we even did intro and booked a hall and i was best friends with his sister and knew the whole family. till today no explanation from him or his whole family he just woke up 3 weeks to the date and postponed the wedding and now he keeps fleeting in and out of my life for 4 years now with no purpose so i advise you run, run like hell!!!!

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    Replies
    1. In and out of ur life, are u a taxi?
      Boot him out for good jo.

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    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    3. Poster are you sure you are not me. Only difference is he never came back and took my heart with him.

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  20. dear poster d lord is ur strenght ok.d truth is he no longer want to marry u.just dat he dont knw hw to tel u.i will advise u move on ok.

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  21. Sorry dear. Dnt look back this time, take a long walk, love will find you again,he thinks he can misbehave and you ll always be waiting...Not this time hun!
    #pam👄#

    ReplyDelete
  22. life is funny, he is no longer sure of himself, my dear if he is for you he will come back.

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  23. Poster, my ex called it off for no reason. I wept badly because I was really ready to get committed. Most men are mean. It was hard getting over him, but, I kept telling myself that "my prayers were answered through him". In the sense that we weren't meant to be. It's good you guys are over. Imagine you got married to him aiidy, this guy obviously wants to play around, since he isn't matured to know what he wants. Get up, dust your shorts and move on. He aiint worth the break of a sweat. I wish you strength

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Men are special beings, women are mysterious beings. You guys started dating early hence the reason it seems a number of years had gone by. Immature and experimental years don't count, not to the guy. The crux here however is that you both discovered yourself and corrected what would have been a tragic existence. You don't want to experience what it is like living with a "familiar stranger". Now the whole of your hurt, a part of you has even died, but you have been reborn. A new you will emerged, stronger, wiser and better.

      Delete
    2. Men are special beings, women are mysterious beings. You guys started dating early hence the reason it seems a number of years had gone by. Immature and experimental years don't count, not to the guy. The crux here however is that you both discovered yourself and corrected what would have been a tragic existence. You don't want to experience what it is like living with a "familiar stranger". Now the whole of your hurt, a part of you has even died, but you have been reborn. A new you will emerged, stronger, wiser and better. . .

      Delete
    3. Men are special beings, women are mysterious beings. You guys started dating early hence the reason it seems a number of years had gone by. Immature and experimental years don't count, not to the guy. The crux here however is that you both discovered yourself and corrected what would have been a tragic existence. You don't want to experience what it is like living with a "familiar stranger". Now the whole of your hurt, a part of you has even died, but you have been reborn. A new you will emerged, stronger, wiser and better. . .

      Delete
    4. Pharaoh, Shut the hell up!!! Forming philosophical levels!

      Delete
  24. Eya! You will be fine


    #I am fruitful vine, I am a joyful mother of children

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  25. Broken engagement is better than broken marriage

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Na lie, na the same
      Xcept u hv kids

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    2. Don't be dull anon it's not the same thing

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  26. he is no longer sure of himself okwaya.... my dear live ur life, if he is the one he will come back if not trust me better one is coming.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Poster sorry
    Ignore the guy totally
    Its gonna be very hard but pls do
    E-hugs😘

    ReplyDelete
  28. Hmm...nawa o.God help us.Sorry dear poster.Yoy must be going through hell emotionally right now.But you'll be fine eventually.Just keep holding on and take everyday as it comes.Some days will be better than others.Goodluck.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Rule numero uno... Never go back to an ex, there's a reason why it never worked out.
    You broke that rule swerry...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Best comment today!!!!

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    2. ....but if u decide to go back to your Ex. No SEX, be a mermaid until your wedding night.

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    3. Who exactly made that rule? Which reference book can I find the rule?? Who watches over the application of such rule???!

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  30. Babe,that ship has sailed. It was never yours. Don't waste your time. True love will find you-one who will be sure, who will hold you and never want to let you go. Until then, carry out your plans. God first, work, travel, take your mind off men matters. You'll be fine girl. You will be fine.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Poster I feel your pain. The best is to dust yourself and move on. All I know is that the moment a guy/babe requests for a break in relationship, it means they want out, they want to move with a new person. God has better plans for you.

    ReplyDelete
  32. My dear don't lose hope, the guy doesn't know what he wants.

    I think his father doesn't approve of your relationship and the guy himself is confused.

    Babe you deserve the best and the best will locate you, raise your head up and walk,surround yourself with the right people and everything will fall into place.
    Refuse to dwell in self pity, I wish you the best.

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  33. Poster am sorry for what you are passing through right now my sister

    The good Lord will give you strength to carry on, I promise you that a best man who can value your worth will come your way sooner than expected

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  34. Babe,that ship has sailed. It was never yours. Don't waste your time. True love will find you-one who will be sure, who will hold you and never want to let you go. Until then, carry out your plans. God first, work, travel, take your mind off men matters. You'll be fine girl. You will be fine.

    ReplyDelete
  35. #StellaWhileYouWereAway my single n mingle babe came around n sucked prick. Pls when are u goin off again?cos she claimed she was so bored cos sdk wasn't workin so I asked her to come over n she gave a pro blow job.she's a good rider too.one down,3 to go.single and mingle is bae

    Joe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't blame you at all
      It's the dumb dick hungry bitches giving you guys free pussy that I blame.

      Delete
    2. For ur mind u be conquerer oh

      Delete
    3. Yimu!!! Keep your hands greased with your vaseline. Loser oshi!

      Delete
  36. James Bond's Girl21 July 2016 at 15:43

    hmmm I believe that once u go black, u cant go back...EX ish THATS WHY They are called Ex Cos they belong to the past . Please just forgive him and move on. let the Love u seek find you my dearest **e-hugs**. I even have one now that is trying to get back but I wont give him a chance cos he got another girl and never told me me about it so why the ''let me see you''I don't get it. I have forgiven and moved on but I cant give any ex a chance.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Dear poster i truly understand hw u feel bc i hv been in that same situation even worse than urs bt i bless God for today and sdk chonice tot me there ws much to life than giving up on myself jst bc of one man (thanks to u stella) story for another day.poster i wil advice u let him go and move on wit ur beautiful life,study d bible and keep urself busy alot.dont be surprise he wil come back begging u bt neva u make the mistake of accepting him back.u wil surely get over the time waster of a man.

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  38. Half baked story, couldnt get anything out of it, what you explained up there couldnt just have happened without some issues coming up. How do I now advise?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Who told u that, even the devil knows that he is learning work from some men...after I lost my husband, I fell in love with a married man, simply bexos he showed love to my son (all I ever wanted in a man) few moth into the whole affair, his wife stumbled into my pics in his phone, and boom he started acting funny...My dear until God knows I have learnt to enjoy every moment as it comes... Men r fast to make promises and break them... Take this from me.

      Delete
    2. So U wanted him to leave his wife for U???
      Please park well!!!

      Delete
  39. Dear writer, first, I see a confident lady in you. And I know you will move on just fine. Plenty E-hugs to you, move on, try, just do it. God bless you.

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  40. My dear, All men are the same oh....Right now i also don't care about relationship because i just realised even the one i dated (my ex) that claim to love God more than anyone sef get him own for body...... They always want to eat their cake and have it....

    IT IS WELL EVEN IN THE WELL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All men are not the same jo, you've just been unlucky.

      Delete
    2. So all men are the same? Meaning we all are cake eaters. Okay oh. I like eating cake sha. Lol

      Delete
    3. Drop you pin lets hook up

      Delete
  41. that guy is an arsehole! can't believe this shit!
    sooo sorry to hear this dear...there are confused people out there indeed, and I do agree with you...KEEP ON LIVING :). Hangout with your own like-minded friends, be the best at your workplace...always shine in anything that you do and just ignore that mudafucker...

    x

    ReplyDelete
  42. God will see you through poster. Move on from this guy and Watch God work wonders in your life.

    ReplyDelete
  43. My dear I can relate, the guy I'm dating his parents don't even want to hear of him settling down with me, he has spoken to them severally but it's a deadlock, I've tried moving on but it hasn't been easy cos he is actually the best man I've ever dated, right now I'm not even killing myself over getting married. I feel like if it's Gods time for me to settle down in marriage then it will happen, the right man will come along or this one I'm in will work out. So I'm focusing on God, myself n my life. I'm not letting not being married weigh me down. When it's time it is time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon let him go. It's never worth marrying into a family that feels animosity towards u. U will spend all ur time battling and men never go against their family. After sometime he will resent u. Be strong my dear and let him go. Urs will come

      Delete
    2. Carry belle for him jo, they'd shut up

      Delete
  44. My dear move on with ur life,anoda woman ti takeover

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  45. My dear move on with ur life,anoda woman ti takeover

    ReplyDelete
  46. Men and their wahala smh. Poster chill, the one will come and when he does, there won't be need for any drama. Ehugs

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  47. Poster u are so hurt, i dont even know wat to tell u, i hate it wen men say they r sorting things out, its jst their way of saying that they dont want to do anytin abt the situation n if u feel u wanna leave then thats ur call. They fool alot of ladies with that sorting things out crap. Anyway, since u hv left him i advise u to try n forget him cnompletely,his father has a great hold on him n i suggest u dnt hv anthin else to do with him or else ur jst gonna be his quick roll in the hay if n wen he feels he need some. I like u, u knw ur worth, dont allow any man to take u for granted jst cos he mentioned marriage, be strong n Almighty God will c u through.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Poster, you don't need any additional advice. If he's not sure of you and entertaining attention (& who knows what else) from other women, let him go as you have done. It's not even necessary to pick up his calls anymore to be honest. It's not petty but for your own emotional well being. There's no need to feel pressure to remain friends with him, the way he treated you is not how a real friend would so let him go. The sooner you let him go the sooner you give the right man the chance to enter your life.

    ReplyDelete
  49. My sister just enter Shoprite pick up a bottle called "Journey Walka" and just keep moving. Don't look back oh! don't even feel guilty... Just keep walking.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If it was that easy e for good oh

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    2. Think of your future and make that change you will be proud of tomorrow. I walked out of a disastrous relationship with very little strength. Am glad I made that bold decision, cos God has lifted me beyond my imaginations. My dear take a walk today... You deserve better.

      Delete
  50. My dear, all u need at present is "only" but GOD. Trust me, he'll come back on his knees begging. ALL MUST BE WELL.

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  51. Maybe his father said he will cut him off from his inheritance if he marries you that is why he left you. IDK oh! I'm just guessing.

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  52. You just ve to move on... This time never go bk to the relationship.

    About ex getting bk together, sometimes it works n sometimes it doesn't Cus some1 might probably wanna get a chance to do something silly.

    ReplyDelete
  53. My dear, I like the way you're handling the situation.

    Don't allow any atom of bitterness or worry to come upon your mind, keep on trusting God explicitly. Confident in the fact that HE loves you despite all odds.

    I can assure you that this might just be a great testimony in disguise. Maybe God just delivered you from a very bad marriage that might have left you miserable.

    Just hold on. Be happy with yourself, if he calls you, answer but keep your options open. Also, don't rush into the first man that comes knocking next... take your time and allow God to do His thing..

    I'm talking from experience, had an experience somehow like that. Now a month old in marriage to a wonderful man. Don't give up dear. Cheers

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  54. Hmmmmmmm.....

    The Lord is your strength.

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  55. Yes you are on the right track . Focus more on God and keep ur options SERIOUSLY OPEN .

    For a man who has known you for 11 years to be saying HE ISNT SURE .. Then he might never be sure . Just say to yourself that u are single .and don't expect too much from him .

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  56. Sorry dear...hope they didnt take him to a babalawo or a false prophet,its just strange that he changed his mind all of a sudden

    ReplyDelete
  57. Correction

    Some men want to have their cake and Eat it..

    No advice

    I'm out

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aunty, 'eat your cake and have it' is the correct expression...

      Delete
    2. She's correct hun @Lois Sam

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    3. Its have your cake and eat it too. That's the correct expression but Nigerians dont read so they don't know. Just do a google search for the correct expression and you shall be schooled.

      Delete
    4. Lol @aunty. I am a man oh and l like 'having my cake and eating it'. Before nkor. Selfish me. Hahaha

      Delete
  58. Hmmmmmmm truly the Lord is your strength.

    Move on and dont go back to him because the love will never be the same. Like father like son. The son no get head at all.

    I am sure the father inlaw is blaming you for causing the death of his wife. Pity my dear. MOVE ON

    ReplyDelete
  59. Hmmmmmmmm na wa I pity you sha. And someone will just expect me to give my all to a man. Me I can't make a man the center of my world biko. Lee boo tot me that. Tanx Charlie boo, you are amazing.

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  60. One thing you have to understand, majority of men rarely marries who their mother loves but they marry someone with similar looks or personality with their mother.They bring a woman home and expect the woman and their mother to bond whether the mother approves of her or not. The fact that the late mother loves you and thinks you are a good fit for the son does not mean the son thinks so.

    A man's choice is usually with a woman their mother does not really approve , except the woman treats them bad, then they move on to the woman their mother loves.

    Men are logical in thinking so all those sentiment of being close to the mother will not touch him except when he finally gets what he is looking for from the third party. He sees you as the loyal good girl he can always twist her head, the third party provides a challenge to him.

    If you want him back, stop making it easy for him by responding to his calls. He is not calling because he wants you back , he is just assessing the extent of the heartbreak on you.

    Go completely ghost. Delete him from BBM, change your Whatsapp line and block him on Facebook .Don't post any depressing love message on BBM or Facebook for his friends to see and tell him, it is too obvious and he will run from you. Don't post any flashy picture immediately trying to show you are over him, it is too obvious and he will run too.

    In a subtle way, start posting pictures with you and your girlfriends hanging out,then post beautiful happy picture of yourself. Don't ask how he will know after you block him. He will know because he will send you a friends request using a fictitious name. Give him six months of no communication and watch him crawl back to you begging. In that six months, open your heart for someone else even if its for distraction sake, you may find love again.

    Just for the ladies, except her son marries you, she is not your mother-in law. I don't care how close both of you are.

    So sorry dear.

    KING XOXO MYSTERY

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good advice! Poster read this XoXo comment twice, deleting him from your social media will help alot.

      Delete
  61. Dear BBM name OKUBO,please accept my BBM request. I really love your intelligence and you are my kind of girl. Come back to me and let's talk things over okay. Kiss kiss
    Yours,
    Brute,Ass,Imature etc..

    ReplyDelete
  62. Poster definitely he's seeing that girl. If he's a good man I will say fight for d relationship.
    Sometimes we need to fight for what we want. Some ppl will come here telling you dump him, but believe me before they got into marrage, they fought for him. Some even used pregnancy to hold the man. These things happen.
    I repeat if he is good and takes care of you financially. Pray against that Delilah in ur relationship.
    My dear shine your eyes. No men in town.
    I fought for my own marriage o. No girl fit survive disturbing my relationship. I never see dat bitch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear please go and beg your FIL. Go with your mother or an elderly woman to beg if possible cry and roll on the floor I'm sure he will have pity on you and let his son marry u. Good luck.

      Delete
    2. Beg for what? What a stupid advice. Poster forget that family jor. They will be the ones coming to beg you, by then you will be married with two kids. Good Radiance

      Delete
    3. Elizabeth ! What kind of foolish advise is this ??? Have you gone mad ?

      Delete
  63. As you've moved on, the only thing I can say to you, is that you'll be fine.

    And to think that he was an ex.

    His father probably had something to do with his decision.

    #WhiteDiamondOut

    ReplyDelete
  64. I think something happened between him and his dad,a meeting/confrontation which was why his dad requested for the ring back,and obviously whatever happened was not in your favour.
    In as much as i support parental blessings for intending couple, i dislike lily-livered guys! If you have respect for your partner,and have good communication before now,he should be able to tell you what happened. If its something you both can work on fine,if not then you know the break up was mutual.
    If you have been dating someone for this long,the least he could have done was to offer you an apology.
    You deserve it.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Forget him n move on. D one for u wud com soon.

    ReplyDelete
  66. My dear poster, thank your stars that he opened up now. He would have just strung you along until you leave by yourself. I know someone that strung his girlfriend along for 10 years. Guys will never come out to tell you to move on.You need to give yourself brain and move on. Please dust yourself and move on. There is nothing like a short break, he has moved on a long time ago. Just brace yourself cos he will soon get married.E hugs.

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  67. My dear poster, thank your stars that he opened up now. He would have just strung you along until you leave by yourself. I know someone that strung his girlfriend along for 10 years. Guys will never come out to tell you to move on.You need to give yourself brain and move on. Please dust yourself and move on. There is nothing like a short break, he has moved on a long time ago. Just brace yourself cos he will soon get married.E hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  68. moving on is the hardest thing to do... i have bin in ur shoes before; if thots cld kill someone, am very sure mine cld av killed that bastard. i feel nothing but hatred for him @ d moment. move on, ur own man will definately come by God's grace.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Hmmmm. Some evil doers have probably gone to poison his mind saying you had a hand in his mums passing. However, please flee from that kind of environment. If he cannot fight for you as the woman in his life, then I wonder what he was listening to in counseling classes. God will cause your own to find you.

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  70. I pray you have the strength to be strong and totally move on. Thank God you caught the wind yourself, his dad probably doesn't like you. Be it as it may, you deserve the very best and you should not settle for less. You can court for three months and get married to someone and live happily ever whereas you can also court for 10years and marriage won't last. God bless you

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  71. Poster am glad you have friends and a job to keep your mind occupied. Dont you dare go back to that guy. I pray you meet someone better.

    ReplyDelete
  72. Poster learn from Toke Makinwa's case and move on.
    9yrs of breaking and making up, d guy marries you bcos of sentiment and pity, keeps seeing that girl. The girl gets pregnant and you are in worse mess.
    If u guys have been on and off for 9yrs and he still doesn't know what he wants den move on.
    You can keep him as spare sha, afterall guys do it. Don't be pasting his pics all over facebook o. Be free and ready to mingle. When you meet d one. Drop him like hot potatoes. That is if he is loaded o. If a brokeass with akagum pls dump ASAP.
    But to be serious, dis guy is taking you for a ride. 9yrs and dated in btw dat time and he aint still sure. Naaaaa not a good sign.

    ReplyDelete
  73. Check yourself, hope you didn't do runs with married men. For that man to collect that ring from you please investigate yourself properly and ask God to forgive you. He must have told his son what he heard or seen, hence your guy's sudden behaviour.
    Move on and focus on God but meanwhile, tie your two legs together. Whatever we do in life, people are seeing/watching and it's good to live aright esp when we dream of marriage. All the best

    ReplyDelete
  74. People who come here looking for advise hardly take it. Still here goes; LET HIM GO! HE WANTS SOMEONE HE CAN SLEEP WITH WHILE HE'S HAVING DOUBTS ABOUT SETTLING.

    HE WILL TORMENT YOUR LIFE IN THE DAYS/WEEKS TO COME WITH SEEMINGLY IDLE CHATTER MEANT TO STILL KEEP YOU THINKING ABOUT HIM.

    CUT HIM OFF.

    CUT HIM OFF.

    OPEN YOURSELF UP TO OTHER GUYS (DON'T MEAN GBENSHING OHHH). ONLY YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR HAPPINESS, NOT HIM, NOT THE NEXT GUY.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I concur, cut him off! It's not easy I must confess but you shouldn't be with a man who has no respect for you. I've been on that path before and the heartache was real but I made up my mind to walk away, it was tough but I've gotten over it.

      Delete
  75. Just breathe my dear.. Let him go and Create your own peace of mind. Hugs!!!

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  76. Check yasef because for that man to collect that ring shows something isn't right. Tie your legs 2gether.

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  77. Honey, do not make the mistake of going back to this man ever. It is better that this happened now than after marriage. You are dating him and there is a girl calling him everyday? Sis, better is out there for you I promise you

    ReplyDelete
  78. The Lord will see you through this phase it might not be easy please just get yourself busy with things you love doing.Go out watch movies not a romantic one o cos that might bring hurtful memories. Watch detective, horror or adventure movies. Hope you find love again soon.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Pele poster.. keep moving, don't look back

    ReplyDelete
  80. I go marry no bi I don marry. But Sweerie you come across as a very strong lady. Keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best. Forgive him from the depths of your heart and ask God for the strength to move on. Its a real blessing in disguise. You'll definitely attract a and dependable man. Peace!

    ReplyDelete
  81. Dear poster pls dont accept him back i think God is showing u sign about him he doesnt have a mind of his own and bet it he will still come back begging but bae dont accept him back cuz hes gonna keep lickin his family ass and do whatever they ask him to do my 2cent I know it hard to move on but pls do

    ReplyDelete
  82. Baby, be strong, everything is gonna be alright. Move on. I can tell you have a pretty face from your write up. Just keep being pretty, and soon a better guy will come along.

    I love how you are handling this. Xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  83. @poster, I am proud that u can travel around without him paying the bills. Thumbs up girl. Give him the much needed space. If it is meant to be, it will but still open your heart to meet someone but plz don't jump in2 sex. It will only make u feel more bad. Be prayerful, makeurself happy and if he calls, make it formal but not rude.he doesn't have u feel u depressed.

    ReplyDelete
  84. Hmmmmmm just like my soon to be ex, dat was doing kolo mental for me.
    Firstly you need to give this guy space, I mean no communication.
    The guy I was loving and doing all sorts for, we wld have small misunderstanding, he won't pick my calls not reply my bbm messages. If I use strange no he will pick, hear my voice and drop.
    I gave my self brain o. I stopped all form of communication, d guy was shocked. Dat is it same me dat will call apologising whether I am right or wrong.
    Like 2mths later he started calling me, noticed I was so cold towards him, d guy was shocked. Wld send message I miss you, I'm thinking of you, I won't even respond. You see I had really hardened my heart. He even came over, came in. Said won't I hug him, tried giving me I kiss I shoved it. He was stunned.
    The best revenge for men is ignoring them poster.
    He is now d one chasing me. Meanwhile I have moved on and met someone else. D guy even irritates me now. This is someone I use to shed tears for.
    I never told him Iv broken up with him o. Let my silence keep torturing him. He even asked if I'm dating, I said no. Off course I'm dating sm1 if he has brain he will find out one day.
    Poster give this guy long space. If he's urs he will come back, and when he cums back if you like let him string you along for another 5yrs.
    His coming back shld be to marry you. And u must be sure he has cut off that girl and he's ready to be serious with you, no games.

    ReplyDelete
  85. Jesu oba who is this @Elizabeth that is asking the poster to go and beg the guys father she even said she should roll on the floor chimo is that how u are doing rolling on the floor for guys na wa i called this low self esteem poster do not try this notin wey we no go see for SDK it is well inside the well ooo lol

    ReplyDelete
  86. The soul ties that's what's bothering you.
    Midnight prayers break yokes and severe at its root.
    Your a human being not a dog !

    ReplyDelete
  87. Poster,first of all,I empathize with you.It cannot be easy for you at the moment but guess what,this too shall pass.His father must have done a number on him for him to be developing cold feet now. Be that as it may,give it time. Play it cool. If he truly wants you ,he will come back to his senses.However,you need to know that if his father is so opposed to your relationship,my darling ,you are in for a hard time.I doubt that you wanna fight this battle forever.His father sounds dogged to me.So,for the moment,draw on the strength of God and that of your family to get by on a daily basis.If you feel the need to travel,by all means do but not needlessly. I am convinced that you are a an asset to any man. I feel you are a very confident girl but the Bible says to apply wisdom. I hope the foregoing has been helpful. God bless you. You will laugh again.

    ReplyDelete
  88. Poster,first of all,I empathize with you.It cannot be easy for you at the moment but guess what,this too shall pass.His father must have done a number on him for him to be developing cold feet now. Be that as it may,give it time. Play it cool. If he truly wants you ,he will come back to his senses.However,you need to know that if his father is so opposed to your relationship,my darling ,you are in for a hard time.I doubt that you wanna fight this battle forever.His father sounds dogged to me.So,for the moment,draw on the strength of God and that of your family to get by on a daily basis.If you feel the need to travel,by all means do but not needlessly. I am convinced that you are a an asset to any man. I feel you are a very confident girl but the Bible says to apply wisdom. I hope the foregoing has been helpful. God bless you. You will laugh again.

    ReplyDelete
  89. My dear, no be today. you better thank your lucky stars and move on. If he is meant for you, he will find you and win you back.

    ReplyDelete

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