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Why do some things just happen without explanation?

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

COLD FEET

Hello gorgeous Stella,where do I start from? How do I go about this In-depth story I am about to share.

For my heart is heavy , and at the same time relieved.

Dear Stella, If not for the word of God that gives strength , reassurance , etc. I really don't know what I would have done to myself.

I don't know where this is going to fit in, but I just need to find courage and know how people who will relate to the story I am about to share , moved on.

It all started 2015, I reconnected with an Ex, who I have known for about 9yrs and dated 2yrs in the past .

We decided to come back together , but this time around to be committed in the relationship. So a year into the relationship , we started marital plans.( Counselling ). Along the line my MIL to be passed on to be with the lord, she blessed me with her wedding ring before passing on.we were so close.( I miss her so much). She usually referred to me as her 'daughter in love' and not daughter in law, she said when there is love , for there is no law.she was an angel in human form. I wish she was still around.

Few months later, the ring was collected back from me,( by FIL).This caused so many drama , I was even labeled wicked and a witch. initially ,

My boo opposed the collection of the ring and that made him drift from his dad as at then.

But I had to restore peace by telling boo to go and make up with them, which he did, even gave him an ultimatum, that I will walk away , if he didn't .so he eventually did.

Few months later, I noticed he was no longer talking about any plans as regards us settling down, but i kept calm , for like 6 months.

I also noticed he chatted frequently with another lady,  she calls him everyday , confronted him. But of course he said there was nothing of the sort I was presumptuous of.

 So  later I decided to just ask him, what the plans were and what we were doing , I just wanted him to at-least say .... Okay lets still give it time , or to tell me reasons why he was stalling.

He eventually said , he was unsure and he thinks he really doesn't know what he wants, that he needs to reassess some third party / external factors. That I should give him a short break....... In that moment I felt relieved that finally, i have made him open up to what the problem was and how he felt. And the same time I was really hurt....

To think a night prior to this confrontation , he didn't sleep in his house... I asked him where he slept , he told me he wasn't going to tell me.

I asked him , if it was the lady I had been suspecting he has something with?  He still said , 'not saying'

But how can all of a sudden you are no longer sure, you kept stringing me along .so if I had not confronted him, is that how he'll just be leading me on??  .

 If you can't be sure now( to think that I had just returned from a month trip ) , when he told me this .

When will you be sure ?

I was even trying to see reasons with him. so I told him , if the break was to reassess your so called ' third party' factors ,That I can understand .

But short break , because you are unsure????!?? Damn it we have known each other for 9 yrs!! Dated 2 yrs before, you were sure, when you approved your mum giving me her wedding ring , starting Counselling ...... And introducing me to your family as the one!

Now , you are no longer sure...

Stella I am trying to move on, to me it's over.

Ps: ( his dad has his reservations about our relationship of which he wasn't willing to tell me what exactly the reservations were, when I confronted him). He kept on saying , that it was nothing to worry about and he would sort it out with his dad.

Pls who can relate with something similar and what did you do?

He recently called , I picked up... And he said he wanted to find out how I was doing ... Like seriously why is it that some men wants to eat their cake and still have it.

I told him , I thought you said you needed a break , why you calling me?

Right now , I'm focusing on God, my job and good friends and I will be traveling a lot just to take my mind off this.

As MAN issue don tire me... I gave it all this time around , see where it landed me.