ADVICE NEEDED
Hi Stella
I have always prayed to God to give me a spouse.
I met a guy on a dating site, let's call him Dapo. He asked for my contact and we were in talking stage. I am a 30 years old working class lady. Dapo is also a sport consult.
He asked for my Instagram handle, I gave him and he gave me his own. When I checked his Instagram handle I noticed he does philanthropy, and is a sport enthusiast. People were hailing him on his comment section.
Suddenly I saw a lady's comment posted on his picture in which the lady alleged that he is a ritualist that dapo wants to.use her to renew .
There was no comment under the lady's comment to ascertain what the lady had said. I followed the lady on Instagram but her account was private. I have not met dapo physically but we are getting serious.
Suddenly I saw a lady's comment posted on his picture in which the lady alleged that he is a ritualist that dapo wants to.use her to renew .
There was no comment under the lady's comment to ascertain what the lady had said. I followed the lady on Instagram but her account was private. I have not met dapo physically but we are getting serious.
I told him about the comments about him being a ritualist, I screenshot the lady's comment and dapo told me he doesn't know the lady in Question and he deleted the comment on his Instagram. He is neither rich or poor ..
BVs should I believe Dapo? Or I should move on????
PICK YOUR TWO LEFT LEGS FROM THE GROUND AND RUN...If your legs refuse to run, leave them and RUN!!!::
RUN FAST and block him everywhere!!!
How can you get serious with someone you’ve never met?
ReplyDeleteNo be ment ?
DeleteI don't get it too..she's even writing chronicle on top stranger with ritual allegation..instead of her to block him..
DeleteOnline dating that doesn't have address or location. Poster you didn't mention his base.
DeleteIs he in the same country with you? Unless it was a long distance relationship.
How come you take someone you haven't met that serious??
Leave him o
DeleteAnd you wanna marry someone from dating app.
Good question
DeleteYou told him about the comment instead of you to DM the lady? Someone you met on a dating app?? You don’t care about yourself so I pity you in advance
ReplyDeleteHer account was private she said.
DeleteNo need to even investigate..she should just run!!
DeleteThe lady is something else. An information that she would have used to investigate him by herself without his notice. Did she even expect him to admit that he's a ritualist? These are the type of laddies that you reveal something to about their man and they'll go straight to the man to tell him who told them instead of taking advantage of the revelation to do proper investigation by herself to know if the person is lying or not.
DeleteNow the guy will look for more means to cover up his mess if truly he's guilty
DeleteI'm not saying get involved with him, but do your own findings (from a distance o). What if the lady just said that to hurt him. What if??
ReplyDeletethis is a serious allegation despite not sure if the story is true. i will advise you take chill pill and investigate further before taking dapo serious
ReplyDeleteShe takes online comments serious. Where you know anybody can throw shit because data is cheap.
DeletePoster you are senseless. Do you know how many other ladies that comment would have saved? You think he’s chatting only you? Now you’ve him delete it I’m so pissed
ReplyDeleteHmmm... Another angle. Now she has jeopardized the safety of other girls on his list.
DeleteShe that was lucky to see it is still here asking questions.
You can still offer your advice to her without Insults haba mana !!!
DeleteCalling a grown up like you senseless is really appaling !!!
Nk, did the poster act like someone with a working brain? Not everything is insult abeg. She acted senselessly and even she gan knows it
DeleteIs there any need to ask questions in this scenario? You should be thankful that God made you see that comment before you called his attention to it hence the deletion.
ReplyDeleteDear poster, the handwriting on the wall is very clear and bold. Flee!!
Proclaiming or even accusing one to be a ritualist openly like that isn't something to toy with.
Whether he is one or not, it's better to be safe than sorry. Flee!!
Exactly..poster better safe than sorry...block him ASAP, don't waste time asking questions..I pray this guy does not end up brainwashing
DeleteProsper doesn't care about the comment so long as it's just one lady that accused him. Read her chronicle again.
DeleteVery scary comment. You can continue to observe him,from afar. It's well with you.
ReplyDeleteThis kind of lady that has gone to ask him directly is who you are advising to observe from afar? lol, my dear she doesn't know what it means to observe from afar
DeleteHmmmm
ReplyDeleteHow do you even get serious with someone you haven't met?
ReplyDeleteIt's may just be a random comments or not..but be very careful..
ReplyDeleteIf you can chat up the lady fine just that it is impossible with her account in private but pls stay safe don't see dapo in an unsaved place.i think you should do what Stella said ,he might not be total free from that accusations
ReplyDeleteDear Poster,
ReplyDeletePlease calm down. You are still in the talking stage, yet you have already started planning a wedding in your head.....
Let’s be real, were you expecting him to admit to such serious allegations, even if they were true? Like open his mouth waaaaa and tell you!!! Especially in this age of social media, where people make all kinds of anonymous or false accusation.....Some from bitter exes who can't accept that someone has moved on.....
Also, being a philanthropist or a sports enthusiast isn’t a full-time profession unless it is tied to a clear source of income......So yes, it’s natural to wonder how he funds his lifestyle unless of course, there is more to the story, like money laundering......
At the end of the day, the decision is yours. Here are a few suggestions to help you navigate this:
1. Keep it at the friendship level for now, and use this time to truly get to know him without pressure or expectations.....
2. Avoid private visits. Make sure your meetings happen in public places, and you should always decide the meeting point yourself.....
Trust your instincts. If something feels off, don’t overthink it - just move on.....
Remember, not every man you meet is meant for marriage. Some are for casual dating, and some aren’t even worth dating. Protect your heart and get to know people without immediately viewing them through the lens of marriage.....
All the best......
P.S You don't need anxiety; all you need is clarity......Don't get emotionally ahead of yourself......She using a private account to respond is suspicious already and Dapo deleting her comment does not signify guilt or innocence......Protect yourself emotionally.......Not every connection must end in marriage...
DeleteStella, how will she leave her legs and run na?🤣🤣. I won't advise you to leave yet,neither should you meet with him physically. Pray to God to reveal more of the guy to you. God is closer to you than you think. Talk to him.
ReplyDeleteLet's translate OPs story in animal kingdom terms. What will Stella be in our story? The wise tortoise?
ReplyDeleteDear tortoise,
I am a goat currently exchanging greetings and making acquaintance with a lion. Nothing serious yet but I think we are getting somewhere. Recently, while walking down the patch with my fellow goats to access some green grass, I could not help but overhear the comments they were making regarding my lion friend.
The said he has a desperate taste for blood and savagery and has mauled and assaulted a number of goats. I have seen nothing on the part of Mr. Lion to give credence to what they have said. I really do like him.
I stylishly asked him if he knew anything about what my fellow goats were saying but he demurred. My gut feelings tell me that the rumours are true but I am torn since Mr lion has denied these allegations and he looks so cute and harmless.
Tortoise, should I go ahead with our friendship and trust Mr. Lion or I should trust my instincts and listen to what my fellow goats are saying?
Hope she’s not too desperate to understand this parable
DeleteStella this your red comment got me rolling on the floor with laughter. You really made my day with if your legs refuse to RUN leave it and RUN!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Bv Nkiru Sweden!
DeleteNa real tortoise and Lion😀..poster whether the allegation is true or not, I think you should just abandon this relationship..the allegation is too serious to dismiss..no matter what, the comment will continue to ring in your mind and you're going to be suspicious of the guy's every move..just let this one go and pray for God's guidance in your next relationship..dont be desperate!
DeleteIf I were you, I would have gotten closer to the lady (follow her on Instagram and chat her up) to get the full gist of her story without letting Dapo know anything. You could have opened up to her that the guy wants to date you, then see what she will tell you.
ReplyDeleteYour asking Dapo without first finding out more details was not a smart move. What did you expect him to tell you, that the girl was saying the truth???
Oh poster, you think he will tell you he knows the girl.... you should thank God that lady exposed him
ReplyDeleteGod must be watching out for her..RUN!
DeleteFor a 30 years old your behavior shocked me. So you went ahead and told dapo instead. Nawa
ReplyDeleteShe Wan bia Mrs by force na . Make e no be from grave sha. Desperados everywhere
DeleteAs in, don't mind her..as if the guy will tell her if it's true, una no dey fear ni?the guy most likely knows who made the comment and why..poster better run...you can always meet other people to date,don't play with your life, a lot is happening these days..it's not worth the risk please!
DeleteYou all know that trolls exist right and this may just be a troll that is just typing shit for fun!!
ReplyDeleteI will expect you to dm that lady and wait for her to answer you. If she doesn’t answer you, she may just be a liar!
This right here is the comment i have been waiting for and i am surprised everyone is telling her to run, if this is how we all left relationships without doing due diligence and giving people a chance to prove themselves, none of us would be married today, cos that ur hubby u r proud of is someone’s ex and she might not have good things to say about him/her cos of the ‘ex’ factor.
DeleteI am surprised even Stella is telling u to run because of only one comment from a lady, remember that guy that keeps trolling Stella here on her blog, saying all sorts of nasty things about her, should we also run from the blog becos of the bad comment of one person? This is smone that Stella has been vry good to, yet he turned his back and insults her at will. So OP u dnt know their story, find it, in the end there might even be no story, like Eka said she might even be a troll, it might even be a guy behind the account. Just do ur due diligence before a good man will pass u by.
Good luck!
poster so you expected him to tell you what that lady said was true? the lady dropped a hint for you and other longer throat babes who will fall into his net but you went ahead to inform him cos you are already in love with him. You should have done more investigation from that lady to get more evidence on what she said but you went ahead to inform that guy and he has deleted that comment. You did not do well at all.
ReplyDeleteYou are asking us if you should stay with Dapo or walk away from someone you met online. Wait till you visit him and he decide to dice your whole body like that gospel artist did to Elle some months back. If you people are not afraid of people you meet online or dating sites i don't know what else to say.
Be careful.Do some findings about him.
ReplyDeleteAge has thought me not o believe everything I hear or read because people can go to any leant to discredit others.
ReplyDeleteIf the guy is a ritualist, you don't expect him to tell you, look for that lady, since you have her handle, bombard her with massages till you get her attention and hear from her, till then don't ever try to visit Dapo. Dey your dey till you confirm your fears from afar.
If you were the lady would you tell a total stranger such serious allegations? Because I won’t because I don’t know what game the person in the other end is playing .
DeleteThe best thing is to alert from the ship because it will never sail.
17:17 ever heard of internet trolls? Google them up, that’s what they do. They have even done and said worse to the blog owner. Even dragging her hubby n kids, kids that they have never seen.
DeletePeople does troll but not with serious allegation like ritualist. And then if he is a philanthropist, what is his day job? People need to engage loads of wisdom when dealing with strangers to avoid stories that touch.
DeleteWere you expecting to say yes to the allegation? With what is going on in the country now,I'd advise you to not bother with trying to play detective..just abandon this ship ASAP!..follow Stella's advice..life is precious o.
ReplyDeletePoster with the recent happenings of ladies being killed by guys they met on social media, I'd advice you run as fast as your legs can carry you. And by the way, were you expecting him to accept that he knows the lady. Abeg run o.
ReplyDeletePoster RUN !!!!!
ReplyDeleteTeacher run just like that? Without asking her to do her findings about him?
DeleteLearner.... Run along too🥱
DeleteNna ehh, this generation una dey take risk ooo. Never have I ever thought of visiting someone that all my family members and friends do not know. I am in my 50s and I am wired that way.
ReplyDeleteOk you can argue that “stranger can turn to lovers” but we ought not to be reckless with our lives, especially with what is happening in the world right now.
The fact that such accusations was on his comment section is worrying to say the least. How many people have been randomly accused of such heinous crime?
Consider your decision and action carefully and thoughtfully because this life no get part 2 oo.
You're right..it looks like a random comment but what are the odds?...better to err on the side of caution ⚠️
DeleteI don laf tire Mammi Stella how she go leave her leg as e no carry her dey run nah🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteDear post mk your inquiries very well no go fall in love oo ,use your head 🙄
My own advice is just cut off from Dapo. Don't be another headless body!!!!
ReplyDeleteNo need for any investigation, just block him straight, even if he's not a ritualist, I don't think he's up to any good, for the lady to write something like that, their path may have crossed.
ReplyDeleteI am the poster. I have blocked dapo today seeing you guy's comment and my life doesn't have photocopy. He did me no wrong but the accusations seems weighty I couldn't private chat the lady because her account was in private and I feel some times people are accused wrongly by bitter exes. He said he never saw the comment that he will have deleted it long ago. The comment was in 2022. I am done with the ship. He is sport consultant according to him and we stay in the same city which is Ibadan.
ReplyDeleteI am the POSTER. I have deleted dapos contact , he is a sport consultant I feel the allegations might be weighty and seeing you guy's comment have blocked but the lady that made the comment did that in 2022. Although some people might be accused wrongly by bitter exes. But my life has no photocopy.
ReplyDeletePoster, this is actually a no brainer but I guess you're already in love with this stranger you've not even met and your emotion is all over the place..you are not asking the right question..your question shouldn't be should I believe Dapo..if I were you,I'd ask myself these questions
ReplyDelete1. What is my priority? Safety or the relationship? ..Safety
2.what do I have to lose if Dapo is telling the truth and I don't believe him?..worst case I lose the relationship
3.what do I have to lose If Dapo is lying and I believe the lies?..it becomes a matter of life and death
Poster..if I were in your shoes, I'd focus on my safety and run!! Life has no duplicate..
Wen dem allege, yu investigate. Dat what dem wise people do.
ReplyDeleteNot everyone will sing dem praises alla de time, some must allege. Ya job is to filter.
Out of alla de good comments on Dapo page, den one bad comment, and den alla sudden Dapo issa bad man?
Haa! You shouldn't be in a hurry for marriage at this stage.take it slowly and ask God for help, only him can reveal all the truth you need to know.
ReplyDeleteDon’t run
ReplyDeleteDo your own findings
This internet anyone can say anything about anyone
I feel like you should give me benefit of the doubt. Create another account. Add the lady and make enquiries
ReplyDeleteI think you should have observed him first with such allegation since you are on talking stage. Then after making your findings you confront him and not the later before the former.
ReplyDelete