Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.....

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Friday, November 15, 2019

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.....

WOW.........










STAND ALONE NARRATIVE:

REPAYING EVIL WITH GOOD



She Was my childhood friend. We went to the same primary and secondary school. We relocated to another state, due to the nature of my dad's job. That didn't stop us from communicating with each other.




 She gained admission before me, into a polytechnic and I noticed a slight change. I didn't see it as anything. I felt school pressure was taking a toll on her so I didn't react. A year later, I got admitted into a university, she was the first I called, when she found out it was a uni, her countenance changed. She just said "Congrats o" and that was it. We kept in touch nevertheless. Along the line, we lost contact. We reconnected back after so many years. I was delighted to hear from her. I was serving while she just graduated.




She asked if I was married and I said no. She said she wants to get married asap as her younger sister is married and her mum is putting her under pressure. I told her not to worry that God will answer her. It was an on and off communication. One day, she sent me an invite, it was her wedding invitation. I was joyous and happy. I travelled down to the east for the wedding. I spent three days. When I arrived at their place, it was such a good time to reconnect with everyone but that was short-lived.

 Her mum asked,
"*** Di gi kwanu"?? I replied,
"Mummy, alubem Di o" She said,
"Haaaaa,gini mere"
I told her "God's time is the best".


All through my short stay there, I wasn't myself as she didn't fail to tell me to try and get married. How old was I then?26 yrs! After the thanksgiving service on sunday, I took a night bus to my base, I didn't want to stay one more second with them as her two sisters joined their mum to subtly mock me. They never called to find out if I got home safely or not. Well,God brought me home amidst the terrible experience that night.



 Well, i kept the communication line opened even when she rarely replied my chats. One day, she uploaded a picture she took at Ikeja City Mall, Wow!, I asked her if she was in Lagos, she said she has relocated!. I promised to visit her. I asked for her address which she never sent . I didn't bother again. I was always checking her up on her.



Yesterday, I went to balogun market to pick up some goods, guess who I saw?****! She was at my customer's stall to buy things as well. It was the most embarrassing day of my life! I hugged her, with my full dentition on display! Babe acted like she had amnesia!She never hugged me back, neither did she smile. It was the coldest reception ever!I prayed for the ground to open and swallow me. She just said, "how na"? And continued talking to my customer. Even the man was confused.I quickly left.



I didn't even know when tears came rolling down my face. Never been humiliated this way!
I went back to the cab that brought me, called my customer that I'll send someone to come pick up the goods. I felt really hurt. 



After market runs, on my way home, I saw ****!. She was dragging two heavy bags, trying to get to the bus stop. I wanted to ignore her but I couldn't. I stopped and asked her where she was going to, she was shocked and suprised! She told me. I offered to help her. She didn't believe it!.



She was uncomfortable! 



To break the silence, I started a conversation. "How are you doing? You look great!". She broke down in tears. She apologized for her nasty attitude towards me. She told me a lot of personal challenges she's been going through. She's a single mum of 3. I felt really bad. I prayed with her and told her that God will do a new thing in her life. 


I ended up dropping her at her place and I left. 



I told my cousin,cos she knows all has been happening and she was angry.She said, "onyeoma nda Cy" Why didn't you ignore her. After she embarrassed you". 


I told her, " This is what makes me sleep well at night, paying evil with good"




`WOW,your closure got me!!!....I was even waiting for you to walk out on her or ignore her...Thank you....I got the Message and i am sure some people will as well..

124 comments:

  1. Wow what a story. I pray others like your friend learn from this and please don’t stop doing good even in the midst of adversity and mockery. Stay blessed!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Babe you are good and good people always receive their reward. You will surely receive yours, Amen!

      Delete
    2. You are a good person with a good heart. keep being good my dear and thanks for sharing this with us.

      Delete
    3. Poster, you have a good heart. Not everyone will assist her after such humiliation. God bless you, I learnt something from you today.

      Delete
    4. God bless you poster you are kind

      Delete
    5. This ur friend is my friend(s)!

      I dnt kno y I always carry friends ontop my head n them, dey put me under their feet n match!

      Now no more friends abeg. 1 or 2 distant friends is ok.

      Delete
  2. I don't keep friends, friends are always low key envious of your success. I realized that a long time ago & now I keep everyone at an arms length. My hubby is my best friend and gossip partner even though he upsets me sometimes and I start planning on how to leave him 😀. That's asides, human beings are envious in nature...if you are doing good, keep your friends far away to avoid stories that touch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Elena when was the last time you took a proper stock of your life? I'm not blaming you but sometimes the problem is us and we think it's our friends. Everybody can't be bad and only you is good. Have a rethink and evaluate your life.

      Delete
    2. Your type is so Rare abeg, after the public humiliation, you still went to assist her. You think her type can change, NEVER...

      Your friend has a Wicked heart 💔, she’s full of Bile.

      My only Advice to you is to : Stay Far away from her... Her Type will always want to be on Top, while others beg for crumbs from her Table...

      I’ve seen her Type before... They are Evil PERSONIFIED...

      Delete
    3. Poster

      Your type is so Rare abeg, after the public humiliation, you still went to assist her. You think her type can change, NEVER...

      Your friend has a Wicked heart 💔, she’s full of Bile.

      My only Advice to you is to : Stay Far away from her... Her Type will always want to be on Top, while others beg for crumbs from her Table...

      I’ve seen her Type before... They are Evil PERSONIFIED...

      Delete
    4. @ 15:27 I don’t think so! I don’t have friends too because I wish my friends would put in the same energy I put when I am your friend. They tend to make a fool of me and take advantage of my kindness. It is not me oh! If you know you cannot go on errands for me like I do for you, or you think the only time I am important is if you need someone to take care of your kids, or you want to borrow money, Biko, think again, because if you cannot share your joys with me too then I am out! It is called SELF ESTEEM, SELF RESPECT! I am QUEEN and would not be treated any thing lower than that!

      Delete
    5. Thanks anon 15:59. I have a friend that calls me only when she needs something. I try to be there for people but to avoid all the bullshit I keep my distance.

      Delete
    6. Although I don’t have a lot of friends, I have a few close ones. I invest in my friendships. My friends are not perfect just like I’m not perfect. They do not always treat me the way I treat them but they each bring something to the table. Nobody brings everything to the table but their is good in everybody.

      Delete
  3. People truly have different levels of grace. You have an exceptional one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster, your real point for this epistle is to tell us she is now single and worse off than you. You are a terrible person. You didn't help her out of love but to get closure that you are better than her.

      Your jealousy too must have shown when you were at her wedding and she and her family saw through you. It has been a friendship of competition from day one.

      Delete
    2. @Saphire, you saw through her too right! Lol

      Delete
    3. You are stupid saphire..Very stupid. I am not the poster tho

      Delete
    4. Bitterleaf! Aaahhh

      Delete
    5. But poster didn’t even know she was divorced until she stopped to help her out? And about the wedding, if you know how some families (read mothers) advice their daughters about keeping their distance from the lie single friends, you’ll understand what she went through during the wedding....

      Delete
  4. It’s good you paid her evil with good.
    God knows I would have IGNORED her. Mtcheeeeeeeeeeeeee.
    All these fake friends that think once they are a step or two ahead of you, you are way beneath them. You really let it get to you by crying cos of the way she responded to you.
    God knows I will never remain friends with such a person.
    This chronicle brought memories.
    God’s time is always the best.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too i will ignore her. I trust people the way they treat me.

      Delete
  5. inside life!!!! Some people have real life problem sha. it's a good thing you helped her. I would have ignored her if I were to be in your shoes cos I don't have that kinda patience.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Poster you are a good pereon ooo.
    I'm not sure i would have done that if i was in tour shoes. God bless you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I take space

      This attitude of "I better pass you" is very common with Igbos girls who grow up in the East. (YES I SAID IT!!). I am forced to think that there is something in their upbringing that makes them do this. I have had so many experiencs that I can write a book. Once they have something you are yet to have (education, car, wedding ring, job or even boyfriend) they just start a pride-filled nasty attitude. But as soon as they realise that they have been fooling themselves, they do a 360 and become suddenly "humble". See how the friend went from snobbing poster to telling poster her problems because poster gave her a ride in a cab and saved her from jumping bus. Oh! Suddenly you can cry? But this same you couldnt give me your address because you were married and moved to Lagos. Orisirisi. Same Lagos that poster has been living in since 19 kporodom!! You enter polytechnic and start giving me attitude? What of the ones who have gone to school abroad?? Should they spit on me when they see me?

      Poster I know you are igbo too. I can categorically say that the igbo babes who grow up outside the East have a different mindset towards friendships and status. Be very careful!! Oil and water dont mix. I like what you did to her, but keep that girl FAR. She will try to come close to you again and the moment she thinks she is better off, her attitude will still change. So just leave her to mingle with her type. Dont let her slap you in the face all the time. You dont deserve it!

      Delete
  7. WOW I beg I need to clap for you..Haba!!👌👌🙌🙌👏👏 You showed a huge sense of maturity and wisdom...May God bless you...No wonder the bible say ''Do good to any evil man for it will be like hot coal on the person's head'' (Paraphased)..Not that I am happy about her predicament, but this is a big lesson indeed..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Honestly, I'm impressed by her good heart cos if it were me ehn..

      Delete
  8. Your story will shock the world. God bless your good heart. Piece of advice, pls completeit cut off and stay clear of her. She can never be happy with anything good happening for you

    ReplyDelete
  9. Wow! Congrats to you poster. I'm appy you got closure.that your former friend no try..some people will just change because they marry first or enter sch first.
    Wetin chioma nor go see for sandsand market.

    ReplyDelete
  10. O ri egwu really

    ReplyDelete
  11. Yaba left escapee15 November 2019 at 15:11

    Mtcheeeeeeew...
    Your type will give an enemy a 2nd chance to reload and not miss the target again.
    In your mind theres a moral lesson to share, abeg shift.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't mind her. She will give her enemy a chance to reload his or her gun..
      Better wake up and cut off unappreciative people.

      Delete
    2. Exactly. You are a smart person YLE.

      Delete
    3. YLE thank you!! There's absolutely nothing to learn here. You must be quick to forgive and forget but don't be foolish. If poster continues like this, people will keep taking you for granted and by the time you realised your self esteem is bruised. Sometimes you need to walk away from people so that, they will treat others they meet later better because of the lessons your leaving taught them.

      Delete
    4. Lol... YLE, Thank you for this.
      Poster I know you think you're a 'good person' for this. Maybe you truly are. However, it would be best for you that you give that 'friend' a wide berth! I can't believe you kept in contact after the embarrassment at her wedding! That's not goodness, it shows a lack of boundaries and standards.

      Delete
    5. I was awwing over this story and ss it to my bf on whatsapp cos we were chatting. He gave me your exact reply. I was processing it and wondering in my heart if I wasn't dating a mean person when I saw your comment! Men really reason differently from us. No wonder they think we are gullible.

      Poster me still commend u o. But listen to the boys abeg.

      Delete
    6. Exactly that's stupidity, given half a chance ,that girl will deal with u, she only succeeded in using u... yet again. Cut her off. That's how my friend got married before eme ,after her first child ,she said I should stop calling her by her name ,I should be calling her mama her child,I didn't read between the lines and continued being friends with her ,she was using all avenues to show ne ages better than me cos she's married,Las last I give my self sense and cut her off,last last na life humble her. As if marriage na prize, at Gods own time I also got married to a man she couldn't believe. No situation should make us feel superior. But at the same time we shouldn't be stupid.

      Once people show u who they aare, it's in your best interest to believe them to avoid had I known.

      Abeg forgive typos, too busy to proof read but still wanted to add to the convo

      Delete
    7. @ adabekee you be old school English oo e don tey I hear that word wide berth chai proper English not all this shorthand writers of today

      Delete
    8. Anonymous 16:58,

      I'm a lady and I think along the line of what YLE penned down.

      Not everyone is meant to be in your life for a long time. There's a purpose for the association; once it has been accomplished, please move on. Unfortunately, most people fail to know this.

      It was once asked on this blog which category of forgiveness one falls under:
      1. Forgive and continue
      2. Forgive and let go.

      I'm of option 2 as I can't keep stomaching unpleasantness in whatever form it manifests.

      Delete
    9. All of you including Yabaleft might have prayed this line today

      Our father who art in heaven...
      forgive us our sins AS WE FORGIVE THOSE WHO SINNED AGAINST US...

      Hypocrites.

      Delete
    10. I agree with you YLE. Cos I would have just called her name and waved goodbye than give her a lift.

      Never let ANYONE take you for granted cos you have a good heart. Cut off those who need to be cut off

      Delete
    11. Anon 17.40 lol... I dey try small small.

      Delete
  12. You have a heart of gold poster, God bless you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmm...u guys should learn to question everything you read.
      Why is the poster forcing herself on her.
      She obviously doesn't want to be her friend, so why can't she keep off and channel her energy to bettering herself.
      Why is she playing victim. What's all the story about.
      I'm very wary of people that have all the time in the world to visit other people (especially when they are not wanted) and then come back with a sob story of how they were ill treated.
      So what closure do you have now?
      So my question is Madam Poster, based on the immense satisfaction you got when she finally broke down and told you she's single, think deep and ask yourself , Who is the competitive one?

      Delete
    2. @SDK love child my dear, some of us hold on to childhood friendships. I have some childhood friends who hold on to me like their life depends on it. I hold on to them too! We live in different countries, have different experiences but when we find ourselves in the same place we reach out and can go the extra mile for each other.

      It's not as if we dont have good things happening for us, its just the great memories we share together. So dont blame anyone who acts that way to a childhood friend.

      Delete
    3. Poster I think u are the Competitive one here and not your friend

      Delete
  13. I bless God for your kind, you are a Rare Gem, kudos to you.
    Henceforth, let her make the move, it is not by 'force' to be in another person's life, IF she needs your contribution in her life, let her make the move, please. You have tried.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Wow poster, that's very mature of you even after the embarrassment she caused you.
    Nice, don't repay evil with evil.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Well I had a mixed feeling while reading through, until I got to last part..

    And smile enveloped my face.
    You did well.

    Next time, face your life, don't expect, I repeat don't expect anything from anybody.

    That way you won't be hurt.
    Thanks for being nice.🙌🙌🙌

    ReplyDelete
  16. Wow poster i am very proud of you.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Do not be weary in doing good for you shall reap in joy. Nice one poster.

    ReplyDelete
  18. You are a good person with a heart of gold, continue being good but add wisdom to it.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Poster, it's refreshing to know there are still people like you whose hearts are full of love notwithstanding being poorly treated by a close friend.

    However, I'll advise you to love this 'friend' from a distance. She will always harbour this unhealthy rivalry towards you. Her own mother and sisters have the same traits so, hers won't easily go away.

    Pray for her to receive Christ because an envious heart can only be transformed by the love of God.

    I wonder why people compete among themselves. We all have our unique destinies and path in life.
    Another person's progress won't stop anyone's.
    Let love reign.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are right. I had a very envious friend. We were friends for four years but I noticed throughout those years she was never happy for me but when something good happens for her, I am always the first person she calls because she could always tell I was genuinely happy for her. Despite my pure heart towards her, the envy didn't stop. Till I saw her sisters and got to know her mom. It was a family disease. Very envious and bitter people. I ran and blocked her everywhere.

      Delete
    2. @15:36 you acted in wisdom.
      My earlier comment (you responded to) is from experience.

      My cousin and her mom are like that.
      I loved her like a sister (that type of love Jonathan and David had) but her envy,betrayal and backbiting ran deep.
      She went too far, I had no option to move on and never look back.

      When I decided to let go of her, it was as if a part of me was missing. We grew up together, from childhood through University - we even spent our vacations together.

      Later, I found out she did same to her very close friend.

      Forgive but don't keep envious friends close.

      Delete
  20. God has a way of humbling people. You did good poster. However, I'd advice that it ends there. She has learnt her lesson. Don't go "checking up" on her. Show love and care to her from afar! Not all stray hungry dogs need to be fed. Some only need enough energy to attack and bite. Remember a meme Stella once shared about a dying snake and a woman who picked him up and nursed him back to health right? Be wise.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Replies
    1. You nko? You be assistant Satan abi?

      Delete
    2. Yes, u get any problems with that?

      Delete
  22. Wow tears filled my eyes while reading u r blessed among women poster, I always thought being soft hearted meant weakness cos that's who I am. Thank you for letting me know it's not

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. IT IS WEAKNESS!!! Dont deceive yourself.

      Delete
    2. It is not weakness! It is a strength

      Delete
    3. Its not strength, it’s foolishness!

      Delete
    4. Ok, it is both a strength and weakness.

      Delete
  23. You too give her distance. No be by force to make friend with someone that doesn't want you or reciprocate.

    ReplyDelete
  24. What if she never wanted to be your friend? You people should stop forcing friendship. That you helped her carry her things does not mean you've done everything. People do that even to strangers on daily basis. STOP FORCING FRIENDSHIP

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. She's the one looking for friends, when no one is looking for her. Like its by force to keep in touch.

      Delete
  25. While I love your kindness, please sister be nice to her while holding a 100ft pole. She is evil. Thank God for proving her wrong. Be nice to her but be wise.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Just what i told someone today......be unpredictable sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Single ladies are suffering in this Nigeria. I once sent stella a chronicle about what I went through even from church people.( Sunday October 7, 2018, yes ooo, that was me)like! I am the one who is single you are the ones reminding me in every way possible. Friends, church, neighbours everyone keeps putting you down. Well I am happy my story turned out well. send stella the concluding part soon.

    Poster just be your true self and don't change your good nature for anything. God will vindicate you wait on his time. He will give you the best you hear? She felt she has arrived as per married woman can't make friends with a single girl. Even when she got admission she felt she was better because she got into the university first. Don't be pressured you will get married toone of God's best.

    ReplyDelete
  28. What a beautiful story this weekend. God bless you and please keep it up. Good heart is a gift from God.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Poster you did very well. Even if it's not popular and may seem stupid of you, you actually did the right thing and that is what God commands and expects us to do..repay evil with good! That being said please let her make the moves from henceforth and please even if/when she does be very very careful and dont divulge personal information about yourself to her. Pray for her from afar, always help her when she needs it but keep your distance and expend more of your energy on people that genuinely care about you.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Annoyingly annoying chronicle.
    epele ooo Madam Kindness

    ReplyDelete
  31. You not only have a weird sense of self esteem, you are vindictive. You are more glad that she caved in and you got closure, than you are glad that you helped her. You didn't want her to have the last word, you followed through till you saw her breakdown to your satisfaction. Your inner self is in competition with this woman. 20 friends cannot play for 20 years. You have to accept this. Read some self help books and learn to climb up the Ladder of success with feeling the need to track your progress with another person's. You need to enjoy being by yourself and your own person.
    If you don't change this behaviour, you will go on to head a witchcraft coven in no time. I am so sorry if I sound harsh, this nice picture you're trying to paint is not convincing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What is wrong with you? , you just sounded like a real witch yourself, how could you have cooked up such a devilish thought and just want to nail it on the poster. She's a nice person, many people would not do what she did.stay woke miss, there is no competition here, don't bring in witchcraft theory to it, every one is not a witch like you. Mtcheeewww
      And you are free to spit bile under this comment OK, it's allowed. Insult too if u like, Una oversabi for this blog too much . BTW, I'm not the poster

      Delete
    2. Abeg, is it this same chronicle you read or another one?

      Delete
    3. Don’t mind her anon na ojuelegba under bridge weed it smoke. There are people who’ll read meaning into everything you do they’re so bad that they can’t believe anyone is good

      Delete
    4. In trying to sound cool and different you ended up sounding stupid. Read and comprehend please.

      Delete
    5. Ajebo seems the only reader who got the real picture of who this poster is.

      This poster is green with envy and this post is about her victoryover a perceived competitor.

      Delete
    6. @Ajebo Confidential, you are RABID and DELUSIONAL. You are the type that is qualified as having "a continually evil imagination."
      Get help, fast.

      Delete
    7. Besides why will you guys call someone a witch for trying to air her opinion for God's sake.....

      Delete
  32. Chronicle for the archives.


    ONORIODE?

    OP God bless you.

    ReplyDelete
  33. She felt inferior but your good heart is on another level.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Just wow!!! Poster, I must applaud you👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽. You're a blessed child of your parents, well raised and nurtured with love.

    Look at how you set a coal of burning furnace on your friend with no words but just a act of generosity and selflessness.

    I love you already dear poster.
    The things that makes you sleep well at night is blessed and ordained by God Almighty.
    🤗🤗🤗😘😘😘💖💖😘

    ReplyDelete
  35. What a creep. Poster you need to seek help for your borderline cluster B personality. Blog visitors should please read up on gaslighting and engulfment.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently you are schizophrenic. All you put up there is word salad. You just want us to know you've read a book or 2 in psychiatry/clinical psychology. Read what she wrote 5 more times and comprehend. While you do it, please read up on the "Antisocial personality disorder". I query that too in your case.

      Delete
    2. Ajebo,
      It's really not prudent to throw labels while relying on something as little as a summary, where the whole identifying information required for a proper diagnosis is lacking. As it is, there is actually no working hypothesis set in place at this very moment to arrive at such a rigid conclusion. It's best to be mindful else this can cause distress to the one being labelled.

      Delete
    3. @anon16.30 bia you’ll pay for my fish pepper soup you made me spill with this your comment oo some people are mad sha

      Delete
    4. You are projecting your low self esteem and self hate onto the poster. It is clear that her kindness irritates your demons. Seek help and fast!

      Delete
    5. God bless you Anon 1630. Typical low esteem BV trying to sound learned. Wait till life deals with you AC

      Delete
    6. Make una free ajebo confidential biko d real psychiatrist or clinical psychologist don lecture am for up there👆

      Delete
    7. Well said @16:30.👌👍

      This Ajebo Confidential is jaundiced!

      Delete
    8. Naah! You calling a person mentally ill over a Chronicle?

      Some of you on here are sick!!!

      Delete
    9. Gaslighting ? Na the postEr didn’t gaslight her at all .

      Delete
    10. Do you even know the meaning of GASLIGHTING ?

      Delete
  36. poster you and i have the same mind set, is not easy but if you don't treat them well your heart will keep on judging you.

    you have a good heart, God will bless you for not paying evil with evil, allow her conscience to judge her. She does not want you to be her friend but you kept on pushing it. Friendship is not by force. Keep on being yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  37. My dear u described me up there.i used to be loyal to friends to the core but if they achieve something and you are yet to,they aCT like you are a nobody.
    So I hardly keep friends,I would have done the same though if I were to be in Ur shoes.
    Now everyday every body wants to call me,send friend request,bla bla.
    This life people don't appreciate genuine love.
    I have just one friend and that's it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am your friend too o. 😀

      Delete
    2. You have a friend in yourself too.

      Delete
    3. Me sef Ayam ya friend. I like you for dis blog.

      Delete
  38. Romans 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

    “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
    In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[e]

    21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.


    😮😮😮😮😮

    ReplyDelete
  39. nice one poster but like everyone is saying,know your limit with this friend of yours love her from afar. She needs the love of christ in her life and i pray she finds it

    ReplyDelete
  40. I am forced to ask what is it with you? I may be wrong but it seems you don't understand verbal cues and body language. You can't get a hint when it's staring you right there in your face that you aren't needed nor desired in a particular place. She isn't your friend, she doesn't want to be one. If everything you indited is true, best believe she doesn't like you.


    You felt because you were childhood friends then it's imperative you let it blossom to adulthood. People change and that's why it's said when you meeting a friend for the first time after a significant number of years, you don't laugh in the face of potential risk. Sorry to alarm you, but that childlike inculpabilty and warmth you both share while growing up, the one you took a stab at resuscitating when your paths crossed years later, is at best, none existent and you should accept it.


    When kids grow up they lose their innocence and they morph into adults with varying personality moulded by their environment, family, life experiences and all. And as it is your friend(ex) has morphed into an envious lady with a competitive spirit. It appears she doesn't want you around in the light of the fact that you make her inadequate. The only way she both could be friends is when you are beneath her and at that, she still won't want you near her because she suffers from pride. So it's a lose-lose situation. where you can never win. Your best wager is to let her be.


    I am one to always advocate for second chances because I have gotten it and given it countless times and I don't regret those decisions but when people show you who they are over and over again consistently and intentionally, kindly believe them. Sadly, the situation with your friend however perplexing is irredeemable. Her wish is for you to let her be, sympathetically grant her that.


    Now, it's good to be good. But there is a distinction between being good and being taken for a ride. Be nice but realize where to draw the line. I applaud you for giving her a ride, you did the right thing but let it all end there. This to topsy turvy friendship with hiccups in between isn't healthy for your mental health. Life is hard enough so please, don't muddle it further by keeping friends like her around. Get yourself friends who appreciate and respect you as you do to them. However there is a catch, "you need to value yourself".

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  41. Sweetheart, perhaps you did the godly thing by paying her cruelty with kindness, however don't make this a pattern so you don't find yourself reeling from the dark side of kindness. You can be nice from a distance, you don't need close proximity with a lady who has consistently shown you whom she is. Fundamentally vicious people usually have no retirement age. They keep being vicious unless they have a divine encounter.

    Even in being godly, wisdom must be applied. Like the fable of the scorpion and the frog. The scorpion needed to cross a river but it can't swim, so it begs a frog to help it get across. The frog was hesitant because of the venom from the sting of a scorpion. The frog then asked for reassurance that the scorpion would not sting it. The scorpion replied "surely, I wouldn't sting you, if I do, we will both drown." With that assurance, the frog began swimming across the river with the scorpion on its back. As they got to the middle of the river, the scorpion stung the frog. The dying frog looked at the scorpion in disbelief and asked "why did you sting me?", the equally drowning scorpion replied, "it's in my nature, I couldn't help it". Moral of the story? A person who doesn't have a good heart can't resist the impulse to cause others pain, even to their detriment. Like the legendary Maya Angelou said "when a person shows you who they are, believe them the first time". Even if you feel compelled to give a second chance, don't do it blindly. Remember whom you are dealing with and reserve the necessary shock absorbers or you will keep getting hurt.

    A lady like this can mess up any meaningful relationship. Do you really think she would sit back and allow you get happily married when she's now a single mum? Do you crave unpleasant deja vus so badly? Twice is one time to many. Please, my darling, let this woman be. She relocated to Lagos without informing you, does she have to spell it out word for word for you to finally get it? She doesn't want your friendship but you just keep popping up at every turn wearing a brilliant smile. Honey, do you know this can look like you're the one harassing her? Lol! SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU AROUND, my love, please move on with your life. If you happen to pop up again wherever she is, just smile, say "hello" and keep it moving. You should want healthier relationships, please be wise. Too many good people have be burnt by being too nice.
    e-hugs and kisses.

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  42. Poster Im as much as what you did is admirable and all but from your post this girl has been giving you clues shes not interested In the friendship again na.
    People should learn to respect themselves Abeg. If you hadn’t given her a ride she’d still do the same thing to you another time..... what am I even saying, give her till sometime next year, she’d do the same thing.
    Just because you have forgiven a toxic person for being toxic towards you dosnt mean they will stop being the same toxic person they hv always been.
    Take care of yourself and be careful aiit?

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  43. You are a good person but please biko, ejo, love her from afar. People who are poisonous and bitter never change. Don't ever be tempted to get close to her again.

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  44. If everyone can adopt this kind of mentality, there will be less war and rift among families and friends. You have a good heart.

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  45. Poster, our good Lord will bless you beyond measure, you are a typical example of *pay evil with good deed* . Keep it up ok

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  46. Poster me and you are the same, sometimes i wonder for once when will people go out of their way for me like i do to them, this my onye obioma is too much

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  47. Poster u tried ooo, if its me eh,I will even splash water on her n drive off.. I don't have such endurance, I will just drop u like a hot plate

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    Replies
    1. Splash water on her? This kind of mindset and behaviour is what holds some people's blessings down, cos God sees they will misuse it.

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