Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative - 2nd UPDATE

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Friday, May 08, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative - 2nd UPDATE

Hmmmmmmm......








ORIGINAL CHRONICLE

FIRST UPDATE



Hello Stella, I saw my chronicle posted and I read all the comments.. I noticed the FIRST CHRONICLE I posted wasn’t attached to this chronicle so people really did not understand.. I read where some people where saying I am Lazy bla bla bla... Now let me make you all understand very well, first of all the reason why I said that no one should advise me to leave is cause I am not in Nigeria I am actually in UAE, where do I get flight money to return back to Nigeria? 


Cause my hubby is not willing to send me back, I have told him countless times of returning me back but he keeps saying I should tell my family to send money for my flight or if I have money I should go, as for him he cannot waste his money on me 


2, Those saying I should go learn a trade ( my hubby refused me doing anything) 


3, Those saying I should look for a job where do I keep my kids? As here is not Nigeria I can get Daycare for 10k and my husband won’t even agree I go out for a job all he wants is I take care of the kids and absolutely do nothing, for Those who advised I save money from the food money... 


He buys all the food stuff himself I just make the list.... whenever we go for shopping I pick and he pays so there’s no way I would have been able to have access to cash... whenever his Mother calls to ask him why don’t I start a business or get a job his reply is I am not here for any of those... 


Please My Dear Bvs asking me to leave how do I do that when I am in Another country which requires flight down to Nigeria. He has said whenever I want to leave I should but not with his kids and I should look for my flight money myself.




*This your situation na wah..
cant you go to the authorities and report?Report what right?na wah

115 comments:

  1. Madam, na prison you dey o. What kinda marriage is that? Where did you even meet him? What the hell!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It would have been nice to get a link to the other chronicle.

      Delete
    2. Real prison. Tufiakwa

      Delete
    3. Can u get evidence maybe record him when he is talking that he is emotionally abusing you ? If u have an interview don’t you have nice neighbours you can keep your kids with? Does he have a boss or something you can talk to... he may not like it but you can’t b living like a slave except u enjoy it . Find a way! If u a fighter FIGHT THIS FIGHT ! For urself , ur kids and ur sanity. And don’t forget to pray !

      Delete
    4. Ur husband is a physco chai.... Wish i have money i would just give u jejely to come and start a trade here in nigeria....at least u would get ur your respect and freedom back.... Make God bless person to fit render help

      Delete
    5. This your issue is similar to a lady here in the US. Her saving grace is that she attends a Nigerian church and opened up to a lady who helped her by getting her a lawyer and paid the lawyer. Then the lawyer sued the man and the judge ordered the man to pay her huge amount for keeping her inside the house and also mistreating her. That church lady also harbored her thru all the process. With the money she won, she bought a car, applied for work permit, now she's set.

      The lady i am talking about saw ween for that man's house. The only thing good is that she didn't have a child for him. I guess the stress she was in didn't let her conceive.

      Delete
    6. Madam, situations you can't change, you cope with. Ever heard of sunny side up? Go read "The Secet" by Rhonda Byran. Especially as you have lots of time in your hands, if you study that book and practice it, everyone who knew your marriage will say you did jaz. For the time being, start magnifying all his good deeds, all his good sides; you said he takes you shopping, you pick and he pays?, most of them shouting "prison" here has never experienced it. Try focusing on his little good sides and give thanks for every bit you can remember ever from long ago. Stop writing chronicles!

      Delete
    7. Really Saphire, like Realllllllyyyyyyy. Can u jus read ur own advise ???? Let’s assume you ddnt read her two previous chronicles...Did you even read this very chronicle update at all. OMG I can’t believe you wrote wrote this and I’m so disappointed but I’ll jus assume u wrote this comment without reading the chronicle

      Delete
    8. He got her where he wants her to be. It's her choice to break free by anyway, if she wants tho. She just have to stand up and resist him.

      Delete
    9. Dear 18.25, what should I tell her when she said non of us should ever advice her to leave? She said she lives at the tail ends of planet earth and therefore it's impossible to walk away! Nne, then I said "what you can not beat then join". Abi? Women from generations past have coped with far worse. The middle East is extremely patriarchal and authorities will even punish her if she defiantly causes and up-roar over marital issues that are not life threatening. In fact a wife is supposed to wait till she escapes death by the very skin on her teeth b4 they consider it a crime.

      Since she does not want advice, don't you see even Stella's tongue is tied? So I pray she makes do with her situation by studying him and praying...Abi?! Torh. The book I recommended was what I used one time I had the devil himself as a boss in my head office. I used that book to bend every circumstances to my favour and my career flourished all the more because of the hell that devil of a man put me through.

      Delete
    10. Saphire your contribution today is totally different from what you said the last time. Of course she shouldn't provoke him in order to stay safe but looking for a persons good side when all they do is hurt you is very difficult.
      Dear poster, can't you reach out to your relatives at home to help, or that friend he respects so much, its time you confineded in someone for help. He has practically kept you in bondage. He compares you to a woman who works yet will not allow you work.
      You just have to find away, someone in your church or mosque... Anyone.

      Delete
    11. If you want to leave, you can. By speaking to people, there are charities who deals with domestic abuses around you. Google it on your phone or ask questions around. The solution is there. Start planning a Safe exit.

      Delete
    12. @Saphire

      Kindly note that that book has satanist roots and ideology.
      I'm posting this for those who may visit this page later and decide to read that book. PLEASE DON'T.
      Guard your heart with all diligence so it doesn't get polluted.

      Thank you.

      Delete
  2. If you are really tired, the way will open.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with u anonymous 15:35.... you are obviously not ready to leave... if I tell u about my story then u would know u are a weak lady... trust me, if u really want out, the way would open... u never tired

      Delete
    2. May God help u...

      Delete
  3. I think you should endure for some more time, when your kids get to certain age you look for a job.
    The good Lord is with you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Karma is just flashing through my mind.

      Delete
  4. This is the real Living in bandage.
    Very sad situation indeed ,
    I'm actually speechless .

    I'm not very conversant with the laws of the UAE but maybe you might want to inform the authorities of the DV going on .
    Remember you've children that need you and you need to be alive for your children.
    There must be a way out of this mess.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Chocolait
      "Living in bandage?"
      How about living in plaster or cotton wool?
      ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

      Delete
    2. *Bondage

      Lmaooooo ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚

      Anon ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ its autocorrect

      Delete
  5. This man is probably working in Oil company and that is what a lot of girls will see and jump into marriage. Ehheee, "he is rich".
    Look at his character? No, "he is rich".
    One thing is this, you lie on the bed you already made for yourself.
    To get off the bed? You have to make it well to lie on it again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Where is that madam I live in England that was hammering on marrying a rich man on the other post? Like say they forbid women to be rich ๐Ÿ˜

      Delete
    2. No o...she didn't say she lived in England. She said her background is so poor that she will jump at the opportunity to marry rich and relocate to England!๐Ÿคฃ. People asked her if England was heaven, she said it's her dream.๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ

      May it come to pass for her as she has asked of God.

      Delete
    3. Wrong. She clearly stated she lives in England with her kids.

      Delete
  6. I still suggest you look for a job. or better still start stealing his money. You guys really need to sit down and talk. You need money, you need a job/business. You can't just continue like this. If it's about where to leave your kids, tell him to employ a nanny or give you money to put them in a creche or something so you can at least go out to search for jobs or something to do. This is not the time to be quiet. You've been quiet for too long and he is gradually taking advantage.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stealing?! Chai

      Delete
    2. It's either you didn't read what she wrote or you just want to talk for the fun of it. Have you lived with a sadist and selfish abuser before? Like you only exist to satisfy him and your voice or opinion doesn't count? The only hope she has is to go to the authorities, find a woman support group, find information about his work, the rules they have for married employer etc...

      Delete
    3. @Modella did you say steal his money? Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!
      I had to laugh so hard!

      I see desperate times calls for desperate measures.

      But not this! Madam don't resort to stealing his money please.

      Go to authorities and report his ass!

      Delete
    4. I can't stop laughing @stealing his money.... Bvs ooo๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

      Delete
    5. Stealing him blind wouldn't have been a bad idea but alas, its a cashless society. Its small small change that he will come home with. Those are not the kind of money she needs.

      Delete
  7. Man from the pit of hell......... Yuck ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿคฎ

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Husband from hell. God forbid, all that glitters is not gold.

      Delete
    2. I wonder where she met and got entangled with such a devil in the first place. Tufiakwa!

      Delete
  8. You never ready to leave. When you are ready, you will find a way. How about your family?
    This is like living in bondage. Your husband is a tyrant.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Jesus! This woman is in captivity! ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ

    ReplyDelete
  10. madam your husband is treating you this way because you are jobless, no one can assist you, you do not have money to pay for your flight. If you do not get any job or have money this man will never respect you.

    I will say you should pray harder, watch war room, aju mbaise can also help you think well. All the very best in whatever decision you take.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Excited you sound funny, aju mbaise for Dubai? ๐Ÿ˜† Where will she see it, aju mbaise ko aju Dubai ni



      Delete
    2. Pls what does aju mbaise mean?

      Delete
  11. This is tight but there must surely be a way out.

    What's your offense to this man to be so mean to you???

    I think you have to be calm and find his soft spot. There must be a way to turn this situation around.

    God helps to you.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Madam you need to prioritize your life and safety. Like Stella said, report to the authorities. Report now o

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The poster is not in any captivity,she's just not ready to leave yet. She hasn't made up her mind yet that's why she hasn't seen any way out. Poster abeg you don't know what you want,go and figure it out first

      Delete
  13. Stay there and be fighting bvees with your reply. When there's a will there's a way. Don't reply this chronicles again. Stay there and enjoy your marriage. I'm one who would support a woman but in recent times, I have found out that we women allow our emotions get to us. We barely use our head. You were a single mama yet you still went ahead to have an unplanned pregnancy. What happened to birth control pills? Women have the power of the uterus. We should decide when and who will be our child's father. We aren't our mothers! We should take charge of our destinies and lives! You know the kind of man he is yet you slept with him without precaution. Think with your head, not your vagina!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Can you look for a job you can do online?

    Start looking into services you can offer online and make money

    Members of bvn please give her some suggestions

    ReplyDelete
  15. Madam stop calling him hubby, this kind Na horseband, men I feel for you, please ask God for wisdom on what to do, and be prayerful, it will surely end in praise for you, constant feeding on the word of God will keep you sane and you will get directions through his word, it's well with you, some men are certainly from the pit of hell.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Return to Nigeria na because the way I am looking at you , another pregnancy is on the way. Let your family and friends raise flight money for you. Or what is the reason for the chronicle??
    You are a burden to him already. He brought you so you two can hustle together not to show your reproductive strength. Now that you have the children, get a nanny na and look for a job. Or did he tie you down?? He won't respect you until you start handling bills at home. Your money is your power! Empower yourself. You can achieve this either in UAE or Nigeria. So choose your course and stop being lazy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. did you read the post? he won't let her work. if you dont have empathy it's best not to comment

      Delete
    2. Most of you don't read or read to not comprehend. Get a job, get a nanny blablabla, how? Howwill she achieve that when he is an abuser who stopped her from working? How will she pay the nanny without a job to go to? Do you know how much is a nanny over there? If you keep quiet you won't die.
      Poster, look for women group support, especially among Africans. Whenever he leaves for work, find information about his place of work, talk to someone who can help you speak to authorities and his boss.

      Delete
    3. Poster stay there and be playing the victim card you hear? You are weak and it's not something to be proud of. He probably knows this that's why he can even treat you the way he does.
      Its left for you to decide if you want to continue to live in mystery or you want to get out.
      I don't know why you sent this chronicle,I'm yet to understand what you want bvs to do for you. Where there is a will,there is a way and you don't even have the will yet.

      Delete
    4. Hmm...I want to marry you is not the same as I love you oooo. You carried a low self esteem aura he could sniff from the day he met you. He needed a wife that would not challenge him in a foreign land. You know how these our “I just got back” bros do. They come with the aim to marry our naija girls who they can oppress abroad because white girls will not tolerate their nonsense. So they look for their victims here. Those that won’t call the cops or speak to an agency about DV and other forms of abuses. Ladies shine your eyes ohhh. Arrogance and narcissism can be sniffed if you no rush yourselves.

      Delete
  17. Still trying to wrap my head around this, jeezzz! That man is not your husband pls, he is an enemy sent from hell to torment you. For God's sake even househelps are given space and treated better. God help you.

    ReplyDelete
  18. This is the worst that can happen to any woman in marriage, not having any money at all, be it your husbands or yours.
    You get to be under the total control of the man and cant do nothing. Reason it is very advisable for women to always have a source of income if not before marriage, at least at the early stage of marriage before kids start coming because it gets more difficult with kids around.
    Sorry maam

    ReplyDelete
  19. Run away with ur kids woman!!! By the time u go from house to house explaining ur situation u must find some1 to assist you wtf is wrong with you?? Dont come back to naija.Helpers full dubai common now get a boyfriend manfriend woman friend anything do something get money take care of yourself n be happy!!!! Ur story got me pissed i had to comment for d first time ever

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly! She's too weak, naive and not willing to help herself, MADAM STAND UP AND DO SOMETHING YOU ARE A HUMAN, YOU HAVE HEAD AND BRAIN PLUS YOUR TWO LEGS AND HANDS ARE INTACT, USE THEM! DO SOMETHING! aaagghhhh!

      Delete
  20. I can’t even advice you cus I know you are just lazy and looking for who will buy u ticket on this blog. NOW!!! I’m sure your kids go to school and you are on spouse visa. Go out and look for a job, even if it’s a cleaner job or maid. You have ur visa, to employ you would be easy. Only if u are TECO” and you don’t have p...... that you would be scared to do anything. The next time he touches you call the police it’s 999!call them and if you are in Sharjah trust me he would be going in for a very long time. I know u understand that term TECO
    Even without papers you can get a job in deira. Stop being lazy and get the fuck up and yes you sound very LAZY.

    ReplyDelete
  21. So sorry poster,this isn't marriage oh! What ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ but you need to make up your mind of leaving then the way will open for you...make effort dear,stop folding your hands

    What about your family?can't they help? Pls open up to them so they can help you fast,cos this bondage you're in,you need to get out real fast before bad thing happen...remember your children and do the needful asap!

    ReplyDelete
  22. What do u want us to do, you av been advised to leave, to look for job yet you didn't take any abi do you want us to advise you to kill yourself? leave those kids and look for a job the father will look for an alternative. if you die they wont bury any of those kids with you. besides those UAE countries have minimal laws protecting women, use your head, shine your eyes... dont come back to Nigeria hopeless

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are you OK at all? Or you did not read it?
      The man would not allow her to work, he said he cannot give her money for flight ticket back home and she doesn't have any money cos he buys even the food at home by himself. Now go back and read it

      Delete
    2. stop being stupid and understand things,did you see anywhere she said the man caged her, or put a chain on her legs. she is not imprisoned, so let her get up and make use of her of life b4 she gets old and relying on that man who may leave her when he is tired... madam poster if u lyk dont work, i wonder the kind of education you had, if you can't stand up for yourself

      Delete
  23. You are in prison and not ready to leave. You are not ready to damn the consequences. You need to be strong for your kids madam and stop making excuses. Enjoy your captivity.

    ReplyDelete
  24. 2 things I think you should do here:
    1. Report to the authorities for domestic violence....But if you’re like me - My conscience would not allow me to.
    2. Use the internet to improve yourself. Attend classes on the internet. Watch ONLY movies that would improve you. Take tutorials on YouTube. You can take English classes, etiquettes classes, take an IT course online , learn how to write a book , create a blog, learn how to make wig for people , learn how to make Children’s hair and all those.... or anything that would give you a sense of achievement, or a little change in your hand.... start learning little by little. Keep yourself extremely busy.Read read and read. Speak kindly to everyone, when you need to speak to him -use please, sorry and thank you... When you see any DV triggers, lock yourself in the toilet. keep yourself extremely busy by improving yourself. Now most importantly, TOTALLY avoid him, find a place you can lock yourself up in(even the toilet) when you know he’s about to start all his wahala)Most importantly- treat yourself well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster, pls try the 2nd tip up there. Improve on yourself and try to look for ways of making money on your own. Consider going back to the pastries business, if u can find a way of hiding it from your husband. Find good friends too who can encourage and challenge u to be better. If u truly want to come back to Nigeria, open up to your family on what you are going thru. Rgdless of how poor u think they are, they may be able to help u raise funds. Don't be afraid or ashamed to seek their help.

      Above all, draw closer to God. Love and forgive yourself. You are perfect just the way you are. This phase shall pass!

      Delete
    2. The best advice so far!!! There is always a way.

      Delete
    3. Anonymous 16:34. We should be friends. You took it all out of my mouth/fingertips. As I read the initial chronicle and came back to this one, I was thinking, she should develop herself (what is stopping her? internet connectivity can't be that shabby in the UAE), kill him with kindness (whatever she makes of it is her prerogative) and just have a positive outlook on life.

      Delete
  25. This one is very strong. May God give you wisdom to tackle this.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Madam, you are lazy and not yet ready to be in charge of your life. Good luck as you continue to enjoy your UAE prison

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She's smelling laziness rom far away UAE.
      Living life filled with so many excuses but thinking no one should blame her for it.

      Delete
    2. She is truly lazy and not ready to take the bull by the horn. I am sure her husband has notice it too. You are in UAE and not working to make money. Don't you pity for your kids. You should be ashamed of yourself. Imagine you can't even afford to send money down to your mother in Nigeria. What if your mum or siblings fall ill? Please wake up and help yourself.

      Delete
  27. Madam at this stage all you need is to pray and pray!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm...I want to marry you is not the same as I love you oooo. You carried a low self esteem aura he could sniff from the day he met you. He needed a wife that would not challenge him in a foreign land. You know how these our “I just got back” bros do. They come with the aim to marry our naija girls who they can oppress abroad because white girls will not tolerate their nonsense. So they look for their victims here. Those that won’t call the cops or speak to an agency about DV and other forms of abuses. Ladies shine your eyes ohhh. Arrogance and narcissism can be sniffed if you no rush yourselves.

      Delete
  28. Hmmm!
    Madam the madam! the tune of your chronicles always sounds naive and subdued, why? I guess the demon has really shown you Pepper.
    Do you know what you'd do? It's not easy but you just have to be smart and fast, inugo?
    When the devil is out, dress up, make up, look beautifully sexy and classy at the same time go to places you know you'd meet all these rich Arab men, make friends with some, get cool cash from them..... Plan your exit to another country with your two kids of course, the devil you're currently living with must not know about this inugo?......When exiting, make sure you take all his money! I'm sure you know where he saves or hides/keeps his money, take ALL OF THE MONEY, his expensive jewelries, damage his passports and every other valuebles he has.
    This might sound difficult or impossible but you can do this.you want to move into a country not so far away from Dubai so the expenses won't be much, you have to start a fresh.... That imbecile you're living with has no right whatsoever to be called a dad or a husband, you can do this sis, come out of that shells you've been coiling into for so long, it hasn't helped you it won't help you take the bull by the horn, This is time to chanel your inner STRENGTH OF A WOMAN, A SCORNED WOMAN AT THAT! Good luck ma'am.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Madam,

    There is no impossibility with God.

    Before you take any steps begin to pray earnestly everyday.

    Somehow a door will open for you.

    For those bashing her, pls calm down. Have you ever been emotionally drained such that thinking is a big unachievable task.

    I had my own issues, though not marital. I could barely function.

    I got friends to pray with me, gradually I developed strenght to pray by myself, then I started thinking, God started sending help and the rest is history.

    Best wishes.

    ReplyDelete
  30. People advising the poster are wasting their time. She is not ready to leave. If she is absolutely ready she will stop making excuses and find away.

    Target his pay day, steal his credit card or cash and do the needful or garner evidence and report him to the authority.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Do you have access to the internet?? You obviously do since you have emailed Stella. Find out about doing an online service based business. For instance, you can teach English to Arab women online with the help of a women's support group. Do you have a degree? You can teach some of the courses you studied. There is ALWAYS A WAY!! Find it.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Sorry about your predicament. Whatever you do, don't get pregnant again.
    Do you really want to leave him or you're having a double mind? Tell your people to send money to you if you really want to leave. Don't you have friends back here in Nigeria? Make sure you leave with your children when you're ready.

    ReplyDelete
  33. See as you're running your life ased on do many excuses.
    You have a personal problemrthst no one can help you solve.

    Stop living life filled with excuses first, then you life will be meaningful.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Madam, when you are ready to leave, you will leave. You have the authorities there you can report to, but you don't want to utilize that resource. If you are not ready to leave, build a wall around your mind/heart and don't internalize what he says.

    When you decide to leave, you will leave.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Hmm...

    ๐ŸŽถ Am in chains
    You're in chains too

    I wear uniform and you wear uniform too...๐ŸŽถ!

    Your husband is shortchanging himself thinking he is short circuiting you.

    I don't like crying over pilts milk but,Sis"WHY"

    WHY did you settle for so much so less?

    You need to take steps.. but I will make some suggestions.

    1. Reconnect your relationship with Christ by seeking to know and have deeper fellowship with Him,but you will need to believe in Him and receive His Lordship and Kingship over you/r life if you have never done such before.

    2. Start studying your Bible,also search for spiritual books like Power of A Praying Wife by Tommy Omartian, Fascinating Womanhood by(This one is my All-Time) by Helen Anderlin,also books on your Identity in Christ.(You can check pdfdrive.net to download some of these materials) Join positive spiritual groups online,

    3.Start an online business - look for a skill or gift that have and start monetizing or get an online job.

    4. Start speaking up for yourself with respect,stop swallowing every garbage hook,line and fisherman but do so with wisdom.

    You need to do these in the order outline if you will. Reason is that you are a seething volcano and I don't pray you cos snap/eruptthe magnitude will be catastrophic to him,you,the kids,both families,your communities and the society at large.
    Do you know that just sharing this bondage that you are in alone has tampered with some people's mind and sanity already,why? Cos it is an abnormality.
    So you need to experience wholeness and reprogramming and Jesus is the only ONE that can do this for you.

    .
    Hey!
    You will be fine๐Ÿ˜˜
    #LOVE

    ReplyDelete
  36. Madam all men say the same thing about "if you want to go leave, leave with out the children. If u r sure u really want to leave then -A friend went through the same thing she kept on praying and then hubby one day just packed his bag and left in your case u want to be sent back to Nigeria with your kids. Pray and pray an opportunity will come for u and the kids to travel,then u decide how u want to disappear . Note this type of men may leave u financially responsible for the kids in Nigeria but trust me you ll be happier. You can bake, pple have fried akara etc u ll strive. Pray for that opportunity to return and u ll see him pay for tickets and be amazed.just be nice and act as if all is well. Keep evidence of violence

    ReplyDelete
  37. Get Close to God....He will make a way for you. God doesn't abandon the helpless.. You don't expect us to understand what you are passing through..Only Your Maker can.
    sending you lots of love and courage!

    ReplyDelete
  38. No madam I don't think you lazy rather you are weak,reading through you chronicle first you petty.

    You are the kind that need validation from you husband to be who you wan to be but the one you married does not love you that way.

    Stand up from that weakness of mind if you can't leave then you need to forgive and find joy within you.

    You want strangers to tell you how to let go of hurt? there is no way to let go other than to let go.

    In another way, you can form you sick so he can take you to hospital there you can explain to the doctor or nurse when they want to attend to you as he might not be there when they will be consulting.

    They might just be able to help out if you really want solution.

    ReplyDelete
  39. When you are really really really ready to solve this problem, all the excuses you gave up there will become opportunities to do something about your situation, in the meantime keep fasting and praying.. (sic).

    ReplyDelete
  40. Your problem is the country you are based. No law protecting women against domestic violence. I think you are better off in Nigeria. Open up to your family and if they can’t help. U have to endure the abuse til your children are big enough and you find a job. I feel so sad for you. Pray more and become closer to God. He will surely help you.

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  41. If all you wrote is true and no ascess to money,you can do this,but ask God for help, mercy and coverage,go into online dating. I was once in ur shoes, but mine is different. He was my brother, no ascess to money, good clothes, shoes, food.abusing me with words, the wife keeps fueling the whole abuse, always adding more salt to injury, no body to run to, I was planning to commit suicide, when I came I was promised school and good life only to find out Dat I was scammed I was the fucking nanny and maid, Without pay Depression became my name, u can image a twenty something year old girl, doing house work and Boi Boi for her fellow woman(sil)and blood brother, I will ask for money for pad, I will be yimued, no soap to wash no cream, what about sickness, cold almost took my life, I will pray to God and keep taking hot water, no money for drugs, until an idea dropped into my head, I thank God for that, since am from a religious family and we take church seriously. I decided to stop giving offering to God on Sunday, that's the only tym money enters my hand, I will put empty envelope and hid the money, I saved it and used it to buy data, I started online dating, when they have gone out I will start shooting my shot, I was lucky I got a genuine man, he started sending me money, I started planning my exit codedly, in fact that period my brother and the wife turned into the worst kind of demon, the wife kept pushing me, I felt like giving her a piece of my mind, and let her know that I will soon leave, but I held myself. I continued to save till my online bf, may God continue to bless him,sent me more than enough to plan my exit fully. When I was about to leave I informed him in the night,early in the morning I japa, he almost had heart attack.after many online bf turned hubby, Chai am so happy,table has turned, brother and sil are now suffering and almost feeding from hand to mouth, thank God for a working system if not skeleton for dey better than them. So my dear if you can find a way and start dating codedly do so but be careful, make sure it's online dating so that u will not commit adultery, from there you too can plan your exit. If you don't have the heart pls don't do it.





    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwwnn,
      Congrats sis! Happy for you, I wrote something similar for her, she just has to get a man/boyfriend that would give her money to disappear from the ekwensu she's living with.

      Delete
    2. Which kain advice be this for a married woman?! Poster, abeg don't take this advice. Online dating while still married ke! Pls do online biz instead. May God strengthen and direct you, Amen

      Delete
    3. Yes get online friends and always delete your chats so he doesn't find out. I'm sure he would be checking your phone too

      Delete
    4. Going into online dating as a married women
      Is also adultery .

      Delete
    5. Dont try this. Nonsense

      Delete
  42. Madam please get education or learn skills that will fetch you money.stoo lamenting and work on yourself.you're the architect of your problems.you should have developed yourself before getting married and having more children.see how you're suffering becos u chose to be a burden on a man.stop nagging your husband.keep quiet and be a good wife to him.you'll see how he'll help you become a better you.you've not seen a husband that developed his wife and her family.all you need is wisdom,patience and the right attitude.make your marriage work and make yourself happy.stop depending on your husband to make u happy.no marriage is perfect.make friends and be close to God.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did you read it at all?
      Her husband would not allow her to get education or learn any skill. She doesn't even have any money to do it secretly because he would not allow her work and he doesn't give her money. He buys everything in the house himself

      Delete
  43. Madam make friends. You can make friends online and chat secretly when he is not around and then delete the chats, be it male or female. Open up on your predicament to the person. You need someone outside your him that can help you. Pls do this for your kids.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Autocorrect take your time
    Madam make friends. You can make friends online and chat secretly when he is not around and then delete the chats, be it male or female. Open up on your predicament to the person. You need someone outside your home that can help you. Pls do this for your kids.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Like that anon said up there. Fake sickness and let him take you to hospital. Open up to a nurse or doctor there that you need help and that he is abusing you. Claim domestic violence.
    She can also open up to her children's teachers or a gardener or a neighbour or church member. You can participate in single and mingle and get friends online or from dating sites. If you attend church, fine. Open up and get help

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She is not in America or Uk that’s the only place this advice will work, Dubai is an Islamic country, there no law for domestic violence there. And her husband knows this that’s why he is really maltreating her. Prayer is the key and make friends. There is always a loophole in every problem you just have to look well to find it.

      Delete
    2. She’s soo not ready to do all of this trust me.

      Delete
  46. There is something else poster is not telling us and I think it has something to do with her papers or maybe sure is afraid to come back home to Nigeria to avoid shame.

    ReplyDelete
  47. I don’t think you have reached your breaking point. You are just using this platform to let out your momentary frustration after it has passed you go back to sleep with your husband.
    The first chronicle was a clear case of you needed to leave now you have written part 2 & 3
    If you’re ready to do something you need to look around your immediate surroundings. God will not throw money from heaven He uses what is available.
    He doesn’t want you to work? Why not reach out to church members , neighbours anyone that can watch your kids while he is at work and you find something to do even if it’s cleaning for 2-3 hours. Or better still learn a craft and use it to earn a bit on the side. If you don’t want to report him to the authorities it’s high time you use what you have. God gave you a brain use it! Pity party gets you nowhere

    ReplyDelete
  48. On your main chronicle last year, an anonymous commenter asked you post your email so that she can link you to agencies who can you in any country you may be living in. Why not send your contact to SDK so that whoever needs it can collect it from her and show you the way. That is, if you really want to leave because you married abused women don't always like to leave your abusive horsebands most times, you prefer to complain but remain there.
    All the best.

    ReplyDelete
  49. So this is how you people that post chronicles do bring lies here?
    In your chronicle you said you got pregnant immediately after wedding. In your first update, you said he insults that he married you because you got pregnant for him and that you were a single mum of one. So you were a single mum and still opened legs and collect raw sperm from a man who had not paid your bride price? Then you entered Dubai and fell pregnant again without any job or business or even furthering your education? is it only childbearing that you came to this world to do?
    By next year now, you will fall pregnant again...
    Follow any of the advice up there jare. I am too angry to type one

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is why I don’t give advises to these people. Imagine the lies. Maybe she’s painting the guy black so she won’t Have to work. Imagine the nonsense she wrote up there. In this 21st century??

      Delete
  50. Sorry about what you're going through Poster! Prayerfully let God guide you. Lay low and try options like reaching out to Abike Dabiri or human rights & access to justice groups..start doing short videos talking about your plight & beg to be rescued with your kids.Start opening up to ur GP or your kids teachers. The country you're based don't favour women but there is always a way! Wake up & act!!!! Don't loose yourself in a lifetime of misery....where there's a will, there is always a way!!!!! And being from a poor home is no shame...you deserve better. Make up your mind and stop giving excuses.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Poster only give us an update once you’ve figure out a solution to this your depressed life. Stop arguing back and forth with us!! This is why you’re in this predicament. You’re not ready to take charge! You’re in UAE, yet you’re not taking advantage of the system! He know you’re weak and lazy and can’t do shit that’s why he’s abusing you. When you’re ready to stand your ground and get out of that mess you call marriage, that’s when you’ll be free and your healing start.I Feel so bad for the kids. Do it for the kids! I’m so pissed ๐Ÿ˜ 

    ReplyDelete
  52. The summary of this chronicle is never marry a cold, unempathetic individual. It will end in premium tears. Some years ago, I was introduced to a guy who appeared cool all through phone conversations but eventually when we met, I could smell his coldness like a stench. In fact, I can say that's the coldest guy I ever met in life. I moved so fast without looking back even though I recorded some financial loss to him which was confirmation that he lacked integrity and empathy. Most of them have the character in them before marriage. They don't just become it after marriage. Single ladies, it's better not to settle than to do so and suffer for a long time in marriage. May God settle all singles looking up to him.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Poster, pls hold your two ears and listen.
    1. Decide to be happy. Think about what makes you happy as an individual and begin to do it. You dont need a man to make you happy.
    2. Ignore your husband, you are giving him too much attention. Do the bare minimum you can do at home as a wife but that emotional connection you are seeking with him, forget it for now since hes being abusive.
    3. You can work, you dont need him to give you money. Since you have children, look for daycares you can work. Volunteer if necessary and ask if you can bring your children too. You are getting work experience and can later apply to another centre for pay and reduced fees for your kids. Think like a single mum, if he is not in your life, you need to take care of yourself and kids. Stop looking for handouts. Yes taking care of kids is a full time job and your husband is being manipulative financially. But be wise you can turn it round.
    4. Access trainings online,build yourself. Enough has been said about this previously
    Finally, you are the architect of your future stop the self pity, wake up and take charge of your life, stop blaming others, life is not fair but opportunities are always available to make a difference in your life. When your husband sees you are happy or making progress he will do everything to cause fight to bring you down or try to sweet talk you with false promises. Stay focused. It is your choice how you live your life. Stop sending chronicles, update us with testimony going forward abeg. Good luck

    ReplyDelete

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