Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

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Thursday, June 11, 2020

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Hmmmmmm.........






STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

WORRIED



Stella 

t I got news That my younger bro got his PR residency in Canada. I really want to do have my PR for future sake but I am scared. 


My sis has had hers 3yrs ago. I am in Nigeria. I have a job here and I am 31.I have been reading for the IELTS exam and to be honest I am not so good at writing and reading section. It has been a bit of a challenge. I keep asking myself what if I fail the exam I would be devastated.


 I remember writing such exam for my MSc then in 2014. I failed the exam twice and was one mark to the cut off. The school refused me admission. Luckily I tried after 8 months to a UK educational centre and got admitted to another UK university with just writing an essay. 


I feel my parents are not really proud of me.Even though, most times I send money and some little things to them most especially Christmas and Newyear. I notice when they are bragging to their friends they talk more of my siblings in Canada and don’t talk about me. 

I am also into little business aside my job. I have someone here in Nigeria he makes me happy . I don’t also like the idea of a distant relationship. One part of my mind feels like if I leave with distance and all we might not be together anymore.





*I dont get this..Are you worried or confused?

68 comments:

  1. Poster, your happiness is Paramount here. Whatever that will give you peace of mind. YOU FIRST!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster you don’t need your parents validation. Do what makes you happy and stop living your life for what people will say. 🤗

      Delete
    2. PLEASE, focus on your future. He makes you happy huh ? OK.

      Focus, write IELTS, let your man write It too, do a registry marriage and apply as a couple.

      You don't want to leave because of man that will dump you for ordinary US visitors visa. Mtchew.

      PS. IELTS is not that serious. You need a rude life awakening. Bend your trunk and study, practise too, go in bold, write, speak and ace the damn exam. Those that are doing it are not better than you. They don't have two heads!!!

      Delete
    3. Continue with your relationship. After marriage, u can suggest Canada to ur spouse. It is not by force to live abroad

      Delete
    4. Welcome to my world poster, ince you have siblings in the abroad we the children in Nigeria are irrelevant. Those in the abroad will send more than your monthly salary has upkeep money to them how do you want to be relevant. I am also trying PR about to write IELTS so that I can be relevant. I won't lie you will always be that sibling in Nigeria no matter how successful

      Delete
    5. Its upto the parents to never make any of thier child have this feeling of not being enough....
      I have a well traveled sibling abroad and I and my other sibling has never felt any less.....
      Do what you can lady,take yourself first and do the right things by them...!
      YOU ARE YOUR OWN PERSON!!

      Delete
    6. You need to really sit down and examine yourself and decide what YOU want to do. Forget about parent bragging and boyfriend for now.

      Are you ok in nigeria, decent job, good prospects, nice standard of living?. Do you like living in nigeria? If so then stay...you cannot make life decisions depending on wanting your parents to brag about you. Forget that.

      If you DO want to move to canada then set your sights on it. Gird your loins and pursue it passionately... be ready to fight for the life you want!.
      Sit the boyfriend down and ask him whAt his longterm plans are for your relationship...marriage?...would he be intetested in emigrating to canada?. If you are unable to have such a conversation with him then disregard this relationship you guys are just playing.

      Delete
    7. Stella I think she is both.
      Poster, you first need to calm down, then learn to love and appreciate yourself. No one can do that for you better than you. Stop caring too much about what others think about you, even if they are your parents. What God thinks about you and what you think about yourself is most important. About your relationship, open your eyes and observe, time will tell. Be prayerful and patient.

      Delete
    8. @ Poster and 18:48, but this attitude from parents is somehow. Every child is relevant both home and abroad, haba! Just be yourselves and strive more to be the best in your life's endeavours. May God's grace speak volume for us all at the end!

      Delete
  2. i'm also worried about this chronicle cos i don't understand what you're worried about

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't either, Are you worried that you might not pass the exam or about a relationship that might not lead to marriage even if you decide to remain in Nigeria or validation from your parent?

      Delete
    2. Same here🚶🚶🚶

      Delete
  3. Confused is the word. You don't have the mind of your own. You seem not confident of yourself. What do what in life? You want to live your parents dream rather than yours!

    If you have a comfortable life here, for now, Face it. You can plan for Canada after you have settled down as a married woman...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The question is...will the canada opportunity be available when she is ready?

      Delete
  4. You are more concerned about the person banging youin Nigeria than about yourself n what you want.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 😂😂😂😂
      Lmao I give up bb !!!

      Delete
    2. Poster, what do you want in life? Going to abroad is good but is not the road to success, l believe your parents love you just that they may not usually brag about you. The person that makes you happy, is he your boyfriend or husband. Pls your happiness matters alot.

      Delete
  5. 🎵🎵 Que Sera! Sera!! What ever will be will be🎵🎵 Poster please calm down, don't be so hard on your self..Its unfair comparing yourself with your siblings, you must not be like them..You were created unique..You have so much potentials in you but you are bringing yourself down..You need to change your mindset so you can pass the PR..In summary, define what you want..There are things in life you just don't settle with what is available but what you desire..In all pray pray pray..All the best

    ReplyDelete
  6. @poster. It seems you're desperately trying to console yourself on not achieving those things you wanted.

    ReplyDelete
  7. This one is na confusion and you succeeded in dragging me to it cos I'm confused now.😩😩
    Tell us the color of your problem so we know where to come in.😵

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. it's lack of confidence and fear of failure.
      But it's not too late to get it right, poster Internet has made it possible for you to have access to helpful materials and informations .
      Secondly there r self helps book but I just want you to know that only you can motivate yourself, pray about your shortcomings and inabilities and make conscious efforts to improve.
      Most importantly there is no two life path that's the same , seek God to know your purpose in this life and also his plans for your future .
      I can bet you have great potentials in you but fear has limited you . Tell yourself that you can be better , in replace fear with faith, replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts and visions .
      Most importantly keep calm be anxious for nothing but in all things commit your ways to God.

      Delete
  8. If you feel you have so many good things coming up in Nigeria stay. Being abroad does not guarantee success although the odds are more against you in Nigeria . However do not use age as a means to tie urself here , if this Man U say loves u had d chance of relocating abroad will he say cos if u he will not go. Besides u can go Nd once u get married u bring him in on spousal sponsorship etc. as for ur parents Nigerian parents naturally like abroad stories, they may just b using them to brag to frnd i.e I v plenty pikins in d abroad. On ietls study until u v confidence, practice makes perfect. Finally do not let short term fears hinder your long term dreams and aspirations!

    ReplyDelete
  9. She just wants to be appreciated and shown some love. The way God will judge some parents towards preference with their children eh. Hmmm it is well. Pray and stop waiting for someone to praise you. Let God praise you dear. I know the feeling. But if things are going well and you are happy, I will say stay in nijia and work on your relationship. No be who 1st come house be landlord o. Canada na name. When you come here, u sef go understand weytin I Dey talk. I miss Nigeria oo chai.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anon 15:10. I wish parent can just do away with prefential care base on who they perceive as being successful among their kids.
      I'm so concern about parenting style though still single due to what I've been through.
      If there is a need to brag about a particular child,it should not be in others presence. Parenting goes beyond birthing

      Delete
    2. You really understand her, all she wants is peace of mind and love. Poster forget about your parents for they truly love you. Carry on with the Canada pursuit if you are not willing to marry your friend now and if you are meant for each other, distance won't be a barrier and don't be afraid of the exam, rewrite it in case you fail but I pray you make it in your first sitting, good luck.

      Delete
  10. I am not in Canada but hope you know that in most western countries, there's been millions of job loss?
    As at yesterday, that of USA was 40 million citizen job loss and US has been in recession since February according to the report. Look it up online.
    What you are isn't what your parents or another think about you. It is what you think about yourself and what God thinks about you.
    Does God brag about you like he did about JOb?
    Are you righteous before God, do you have Jesus in your life?
    Those are the necessary questions.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She talked about "long distant relationship," she did not tell us whom she is relating distantly with
      or where he is? 🤸🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️🤸🏻‍♀️

      Delete
    2. Even if there is unemployment,Americans are getting paid weekly by the government, on top stimulus check.better system.how about Nigeria that is always in recession.there are even plenty jobs available in some sectors,I see it as voluntary unemployment

      Delete
    3. @16:42
      Who told you those lies about 'Americans being paid weekly?"
      This same America that I am a citizen of?
      Please stop manufacturing lies.

      Delete
    4. What's the lie here.if u were working before and u got laid off,u file for unemployment. I get 900 dollars every week for about 3 months now.

      Delete
  11. Please do what makes you feel at peace. If you are really sure going abroad will make you feel fulfilled then do so but make sure that whatever you choose will make you happy so you won't be full of regrets later.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Don’t put your future on hold because of a boyfriend who might end up marrying another girl in the future. Your main priority right now should be to secure your future. Make out time and do a lot of practice on the exam and prepare well for it, then take the exam. Take fear away from you and be bold and have faith in God. With faith in God and hard work, you will pass. Relocate to Canada , if he loves you, he won’t dull your shine, he will encourage anything that will better your life, he will marry you and relocate with you. If he doesn’t love you, he will discourage anything that will better your life , he will do it in a manipulative way using emotional blackmail, then you will know he ain’t husband material. In essence, take the exam and relocate.

    ReplyDelete
  13. My dear, it depends on what you want. If for a better job and better life style then move but if u desire to marry. Stay in Nigeria n marry, most young ladies in canada are looking for husband in canada n some are planning to relocate to Nigeria. Strange right? Canada is not so easy for single ladies

    ReplyDelete
  14. Poster that is considering IVF,I pray that God will come through for you in a way that you don't expect. Good afternoon all.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Poster better go to Canada and leave that gbensher. He will drop you like a hot coal if he has the opportunity to travel to Canada. You will still get someone to make you happy in future.

    ReplyDelete
  16. My dear, forget about what your parents think for now and face your life. Let them brag with the others, it's okay. It doesn't mean they don't value you, it's just natural for them to talk about the people that provide more. Let it go dear and don't turn it into a competition. At least, you get to send them things from time to time. You are 31 and have a relationship that might lead to marriage right? Please, stay back here and nurture it,and when you get married, you guys can relocate together. You might lose your relationship if you move and sister, I tell you, starting all over again there will be difficult for you and before you know it, your age is nose diving.Face your life oh

    ReplyDelete
  17. I'm sorry but I find this confusing and funny. Poster you need to ask yourself what you really want. Pardon me, your canadian ambition has more to do with sibling rivalry than your own desire.

    Note that, you can be blessed anywhere by God. We that made the move had a strong motivation and believe me, it's not easy but what keeps most going is that drive. If you don't have it or think because of your siblings and family, you might regret making the move.

    You seem content with your situation and from what I read, you are doing well for yourself. Why not continue to nurture all you have whilst thinking if relocating is the best move for you. You've said yourself that you might lose your relationship, do a pros and cons list and go from there. Surprisingly the parents you think are not proud of you today might end up needing you tomorrow. When all the children relocate, when it comes to it, you might become their only support system. Let me give you a personal example, we are 5 children in my family and all are married. 3 of us live outside Nigeria (Canada and the US). Just a boy and girl remaining in Nigeria. Last year, my father was unfortunately diagnosed with cancer, due to the nature of our jobs, none of us abroad could come and be with him. He had to go to Israel for treatment, it was my brother in Nigeria that took time off work and left his family, to travel and be with our dad. The girl who happens to be the last born is married and has commitments. All we could do was send financial support but when it comes to it, you need someone to be there for you.

    Don't put yourself under unnecessary pressure thinking your parents aren't proud of you or your siblings aren't boasting of you. Please do you. Be yourself, invest and improve in yourself and you would get opportunities those abroad can't imagine.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Poster do whatever makes you happy.

    ReplyDelete
  19. My dear do what's makes you happy! Your happiness comes first! Decide on what you want and go for it fast! As for your parents,leave them to God but keep doing your best for them

    All the best in your decision making

    ReplyDelete
  20. Why the comparisons between yourself and your siblings? You are not the same persons. Do you want to travel abroad because they have also or you want to seek greener pastures? Do not let your parents attitude put you in situations that you might find it hard to crawl out from.
    Do you and what makes you happy.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Your confusion is just because of your relationship. You may choose to stay and nothing will come out of the relationship. I gave up the opportunity to travel because I was in a relationship. Big mistake. Don't take any decisions based on a relationship that is not marriage. Use your brains not your heart. Think like a man.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Seems to me you just needed to rant. It's ok. It is well. If your parents don't value you, God values you more.

    Please, work towards getting your permanent residency. The guy you're thinking of staying back for wouldn't think twice about leaving you behind when he gets the opportunity to leave the country.

    Who knows? You may be able to help him move to Canada if you're successful with yours.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Do whatever that makes you happy,set your priorities right and stop getting better.Just have positive thoughts

    ReplyDelete
  24. Poster, your worries stem from you knowing you do not have the approval of your parents. Even if you go to Canada and get their approval, you may not be happy. We may spend so much time, wanting to please our parents but you are an Adult now. Go to Canada because you want to and not because it may lead to your parents talking about you the way they do your siblings. You are not your siblings. You are your own person. If you remain in Nigeria, you may end up not getting the approval you yearn for, but maybe deep down you will end up being truly at peace with yourself. Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Please , you don't need any one to validate your worth..... Nobody...

    You just have to talk to yourself and decide what you really really need...

    Only you can plan, co-ordinate, strategize on what will make you happy and benefits your future...

    Also, pray for directions from God...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly...i have learnt not to waiit for people to value me...i value myself.

      Delete
  26. Poster it's your mindset that matters. If you believe you are bound to fail then you will. You have to change your thinking, prepare well for all aspects of the exam and also pray.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Living abroad doesn’t guarantee success. From personal experience, life in transition is very hard. This is not to discourage you from trying if you want to but to let you that all that glitters is not gold. You don’t know how difficult people find it to adjust to a new environment. You have to go to great lengths to prove yourself especially as a professional. Many professionals migrate to Canada, US et al only to end up as Uber drivers or doing jobs or end up doing jobs beneath their status. Immigrants also make it abroad but it takes a lot of strength, hard work, determination and consistency.

    ReplyDelete
  28. I think she wants to relocate but she is scared of failing IELTS,the first is pray God leads you to your purpose,about the IELTS,designate 3 consecutive days in a week for practise, get a tutor to put you through,try mastering ten new words in the dictionary daily,register for the free IELTS webinars organised by British council on tuesdays and thursdays,there are live classes every Fridays 9: 30 am on facebook,watch tips for having IELTS on YouTube,download the BBC App,listen to the BBC news for at least 40 minutes daily

    ReplyDelete
  29. Don’t put your future on hold because of a boyfriend who might end up marrying another girl in the future. Your main priority right now should be to secure your future. Make out time and do a lot of practice on the exam and prepare well for it, then take the exam. Take fear away from you and be bold and have faith in God. With faith in God and hard work, you will pass. Relocate to Canada , if he loves you, he won’t dull your shine, he will encourage anything that will better your life, he will marry you and relocate with you. If he doesn’t love you, he will discourage anything that will better your life , he will do it in a manipulative way using emotional blackmail, then you will know he ain’t husband material. In essence, take the exam and relocate.

    Reply See ehn I am so happy with this comment. DO NOT PUT A HOLD ON YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF A BOYFRIEND. I did it and I regret it. As for your parents- don’t be disappointed- money has changed everyone- the love that African parents gave you was not empty love as with whites who we think are cold or don’t really care about their children. African parents did all those things to pepper them is what I realized. Dollars can’t compare to whatever you do so for now write the exams while you put your life here going as well. What will be will be.

    ReplyDelete
  30. No matter how hard abroad is,its 100 percent better than Nigeria,dont follow love and stay in Nigeria.think about your kids future.get into one of these countries,either America,Canada or Australia.i know what I'm saying

    ReplyDelete
  31. It is okay if your siblings are more successful than you are, it should be a driving force to push you higher

    ReplyDelete
  32. Prepare hard for your IELTS.Focus on your weak arrears(reading and writing) and pray to God to make it easy for you. You can also pay for preparatory classes.Once you excel,you will be more gingered to travel.Remember,the higher your band score,the greater your chances.
    Your man will support you if he wants what's best for you.Finally, don't think less of yourself.Your siblings are not better than you.May God see you through

    ReplyDelete
  33. Poster, IELTS is not difficult. You only need to learn the tricks and work with a diligent coach who will help you with your weaknesses.
    That said, wake up daily and confess to yourself that you are not a failure, neither are you a disappointment to anyone.

    We all have our races to run, and believe it or not, we are running on different tracks. You must first be proud of yourself and your achievement before people can appreciate your efforts.

    So, don't be discouraged, you'll be fine.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Prepare well for your IELTS exams don't worry you will Ace it. Don't give up this opportunity for a rlnsp. I did it in the past and now am still in Nigeria though I am blessed with my family glory to God. Just commit your plans to God's hands and let his will be done. Some people say husband no day abroad and some people met their husband in the abroad. Let God's will prevail

    ReplyDelete
  35. O Men dis ur chronicle eh
    We wey Neva enta plane b4 how we wan take advice u now

    ReplyDelete
  36. Beevees oo...being abroad is not a guarantee for success. God's plan for everyone is different. All of us must not live in the abraod. Yes Nigeria is not encouraging but abroad has very many disadvantages for immigrants too. Ask God to direct you to fulfil his plans for you.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Poster please you need to have FAITH in your self, you need to believe in your self no matter what.Meanwhile writing Ielts is not to difficult,just go online to get the materials for the band you are aiming for,all the best in achieving your life goals.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I learn a lot from here everyday

    ReplyDelete
  39. If you truly desire living abroad prepare well for the exam and relocate. Discuss with your guy he may be interested so yoh guys can apply together. And if not do your thing and the rest will be sorted out....do not miss the opportunity and regret it later. Worse case you wont like it here and you can always return home

    ReplyDelete

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