Hmmmmmm...
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSED OVER BEAUTIFUL BABY
Now to my story!
I have a younger brother who is 22 and in the university for his master's degree. He got a girl pregnant and my parents were so angry and with the situation then I knew it wouldn't be a pleasant thing for him to continue staying with them so I had to tell him to move in with me in my two bedroom apartment.
The girl he got pregnant is a 21 year old girl who is a 2nd year student in the university. Now, she called my brother that the child won't come in between her and her studies (which is true and logical), so one morning she came and dropped the kid at my parent's home and never looked back.
Stella, as the baby is growing her beauty starting glowing. This baby is cute, I mean veeeery cute baby. I have a plan of relocating abroad next year, so with the way the baby and I have bonded I want her to come with me abroad where she would grow up. I am more of the daddy. She is eight months now. I pay a nanny to care for her monthly.
Now, while I was coming from work few weeks ago I saw my brother's baby mama having a conversation with someone I recognized partially and when I pulled up to confirm the identity of the other woman properly (they didn't see me), it turned out to be an ex to my friend. They parted ways when the guy discovered she had a different personality- a coded high class runs girl!
Now, while I was coming from work few weeks ago I saw my brother's baby mama having a conversation with someone I recognized partially and when I pulled up to confirm the identity of the other woman properly (they didn't see me), it turned out to be an ex to my friend. They parted ways when the guy discovered she had a different personality- a coded high class runs girl!
This other lady works in a good establishment and earns well too but the other part of her is what my friend didn't understand.
I decided to talk to my nanny (an elderly woman of about 48 years) and she said I should call my brother and have a talk with him for a possible DNA test.
I decided to talk to my nanny (an elderly woman of about 48 years) and she said I should call my brother and have a talk with him for a possible DNA test.
On the 4th of September the DNA result came out and it wasn't a match. I mean 0.00% match.
My mumu brother is threatening but a part of me wants to keep this baby, I mean 💯% of me wants this baby. We have bonded so well. The baby mama doesn't know yet and if left to me, I wouldn't tell her.
My mum who was angry at my brother initially is so proud of the baby and wouldn't wait to tell anyone that the baby is her grandchild. She now spends more time with us when she comes visiting to see her "grandchild".
But my nanny is kicking against it citing the future can turn unpleasant and the baby's mama might actually be in the know that my brother isn't the father all along and one day would appear to claim her and unite with the real dad and all my efforts would go to the bin.
Also, the embassy will likely ask us for a DNA test to confirm if truly I am her father or uncle.
Really confused!
My mumu brother is threatening but a part of me wants to keep this baby, I mean 💯% of me wants this baby. We have bonded so well. The baby mama doesn't know yet and if left to me, I wouldn't tell her.
My mum who was angry at my brother initially is so proud of the baby and wouldn't wait to tell anyone that the baby is her grandchild. She now spends more time with us when she comes visiting to see her "grandchild".
But my nanny is kicking against it citing the future can turn unpleasant and the baby's mama might actually be in the know that my brother isn't the father all along and one day would appear to claim her and unite with the real dad and all my efforts would go to the bin.
Also, the embassy will likely ask us for a DNA test to confirm if truly I am her father or uncle.
Really confused!
*The baby is not yours and needs to either go back to the mum or you let the mum know and ask if you can adopt her....
you cannot just keep quiet and take the baby,there will be repercussions later and i am not even OK with your obsession with this child oh.
Also let your mum know that the baby is not her grand daughter cos that lady probably knows what she did and will come back to claim the child
Inform the mother of the child what you just found out, she is aware but wants the child to be trained in a decent environment. Do not take decisions you will regret in future, trade carefully, you will still have your own children to bond with tomorrow.
ReplyDelete👌🏽 👌🏽
DeleteYour family should call the baby mama, tell her the truth about the DNA. Let her take her baby, one day she will come for it and the whole world will blame your family for not releasing/ sending the baby back to her.
DeleteTake the baby back to her, show her the DNA test.
Sense girl....
I am not judging o o but honestly I wonder how people make love with diff partners without protection
DeleteHmmmmmm
DeletePls don't keep her back with you for the wrong reasons. This one you are dotting over her beauty, hope she will be safe with you when boob starts popping😞?
Inform the mother and don't be too quick to offer adoption so she doesn't exploit you.
If she now starts crying or lamenting that she can't care for the child blablabla, you can now offer adoption.
Pls remember that raising a human being goes beyond a cute baby face. In about 7 to 8years time, real character will start popping (genes/environment/personality). Hope you are prepared to keep loving unconditionally if the kitchen ever gets hot?
Ayam sailing with Stella on this.........
DeletePlease let the baby go.Yes inform the mum.she knew all along and deceived you people.its even possible the baby's father knows and they plan to come for the baby later when you have put all your love and energy.Abeg give baby to owner.if you want a baby real bad please make your own baby.It so shameful what some ladies do.
DeleteThere is nothing wrong is loving the baby and wanting to travel with her but If you want to keep the baby, then LEGALLY adopt the baby. Adoption is legal so you won't have issues with relocation. Just be prepared for daycare cost abroad when you relocate next year. They aren't cheap but it depends on the city you plan yo move to. All the best.
DeleteI feel you poster. If you train that girl, the mum will come one day to claim ownership and cause problems for you. Don't tell her about the DNA test. And if u a man travels with a baby,, you will have immigration issues. File for adoption. Travel with a female escort/nanny
DeleteDon't say a word to the mother. Play her her own game. Tell her you want to relocate abroad with the child and you need to adopt the baby legally to be able to go with her. All of u saying he is obsessed with the baby, na only those wey born pikin dey love am?
DeleteInform the mother of the child what you just found out, she is aware but wants the child to be trained in a decent environment. Do not take decisions you will regret in future, trade carefully, you will still have your own children to bond with tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteLet the mom know and ask if u can adopt her properly. If not it might backfire one day n besides what would u tell them at d embassy as the DNA dont match?
ReplyDeleteStella you said it all. Poster's obsession and emphasis on the baby's beauty sounds creepy to me.
ReplyDeletePoster call a meeting with the baby's mum and probably the father if the lady know whose the baby is and adopt her if they don't mind and you truly mean well for the child.
Haba na, what is so creepy about this man loving the baby as though she were his? What has the world come to, huh? I know so many men, who are role-models for their kids, male and female and love them just as well as a mother will! Nothing creepy there, except for perverted minds, please let's keep it clean! Not every man is a pervert!!
DeleteThis is not creepy to me please. I feel If you are used to doting uncles and a doting father, you wont see it as creepy
DeleteThank you, Chy.O.
DeleteAre you guyz minding the Anno
DeleteHe just heard that word Creepy
People's mindset sha
DeleteWhenever I read, my eyes jump far ahead of my mind, then it catches up. So, when I saw “I mean veeeery cute”, my heart don cut. I wasn’t prepared to read anything pervy, so, I took a momentary break, calmed my mind and then continued reading. True true,I think you have an unhealthy obsession for that child.
DeletePoster should just let the mum know she has been caught in a lie, first of all.
The poster specifically mentioned the baby's beauty so yes it's right for one to be suspicious. And with the child now having no blood ties to him it is not far fetched to wonder whether amorous feelings will come up once she is of age. Or even underage.
DeleteYou must be stupid...why are some of you so evil minded
DeleteThis is very painful.
ReplyDeleteThe truth is you cannot travel with the child. At least for now. There is no link genetically to the girl and the authorities will be on high alert for possible child trafficking.
You need to present these facts to the lady in the presence of a lawyer and table the options. The problem with most runs girls is that they can be very greedy. Once she senses how much you want the baby, she will milk your family for all you have. If you’re lucky she will allow you adopt the girl but adoption in Nigeria is very very difficult.
The safest thing to do is to pay a top lawyer that deals with family and matrimonial law issues and get a legal opinion on how best to handle this very dicey and painful matter. Keep praying and ask God to take charge because the outcome can make or mar the life of an innocent child.
God bless you and your family for your kindness and love.
I understand how you feel. But just know that the lady is aware of all these. She pinned it on your brother probably cos d real father rejected the pregnancy or take deals your family is well to do and she can milk you people or d child will be better taken care of. Or she wants your brother to be here and had to pin the baby on him.
ReplyDeleteKnow that in futitre she might come to take the child to the father or the father might come for his child. What would you do then, after all investment on the child?
The little baby too will grow someday and will require the truth. What would you tell her?
It is Ok to want to adopt the child and make her yours or your family. But you must let the girl know and sign a WRITTEN AGREEMENT WITH HER IN COURT. To avoid future stories that touch.
So true 🙌🏼
DeleteWith video o before she go talk say she signed it under duress
Delete👍
DeleteThis is very painful.
ReplyDeleteThe truth is you cannot travel with the child. At least for now. There is no link genetically to the girl and the authorities will be on high alert for possible child trafficking.
You need to present these facts to the lady in the presence of a lawyer and table the options. The problem with most runs girls is that they can be very greedy. Once she senses how much you want the baby, she will milk your family for all you have. If you’re lucky she will allow you adopt the girl but adoption in Nigeria is very very difficult.
The safest thing to do is to pay a top lawyer that deals with family and matrimonial law issues and get a legal opinion on how best to handle this very dicey and painful matter. Keep praying and ask God to take charge because the outcome can make or mar the life of an innocent child.
God bless you and your family for your kindness and love.
Which lawyer? They dont need lawyer na Naija we dey. They should call her, when she comes, show her the DNA test and even tell her they are ready for another one, she has parents too. She should take her baby to the real father's parents.
DeleteThat baby mama is really shameless,
ReplyDeleteStella has said it all, please take her advice.
I am with Stella too. This your obsession with the baby, calls for concern, hmmm. I also believe that girl knows fully well that baby is not for your brother.
DeleteMy opinion: go get married and pray to have your own children you can love unconditionally,
Call a family meeting and explain your findings, don't delay on that, return the baby to the mother, you can still help if you love her so much by paying for a nanny and supporting her from afar.Just my 2 cents o
Invite this girl over, I mean to your parents place. Make sure your brother is there too.
ReplyDeleteShow them the result so they know what's on ground.
I know you've bonded with the little baby and all that, but what if in the end after doing fatherly duties, her real dad shows up and wants her back? You'd have no choice but to hand her over to her real dad.
This is huge, your love for the baby won't solve this. Remember your brother is the one directly involved. The earlier you tell your family about it, the better,youd be saving your family from so much pain and betrayal.
The trauma in learning you are not your child's father is out of this world. No one should experience that.
It's possible the girl is not even aware that you brother is not her child father. To save y'all pain, dothr needful now.
Sluttychic.
Poster abeg "unbond" that bond. The real father has family/parents too.
DeleteStella is Right! Righter! Rightest!
ReplyDeletePlease oo...return the baby to the money because she most likely knows your be is not the father of the child. She just needed to dump the child as she continues her runs...RUN oooo!
Take your mind off the baby for now, inform you parents of the latest development concerning the DNA, call a meeting with your brother's baby mama in attendance and your parents, confront her with evidence. You can't keep quiet over an issue of this magnitude, her reaction after the confrontation should determine your next line of action. She's aware the child doesn't belong to your brother, she's a mentee of the coded run girl your friend once dated.
ReplyDeleteYou have such a beautiful heart dear poster: but what isn't yours,isn't yours. Allow your brother send the baby to his mother. When you get married, your own child will come cause i quite understand the level of bonding you've had with the baby. Its never easy to let go but please do.
ReplyDeleteThis happened to my nephew, the child grew up with, she is 11 now. I have no intention of giving her up. Her biological mother probably knows my nephew who is 28 now is not the biological father of the little girl but she has said a word. My nephew is married now. Life goes on. The little is a delight to watch, smart and very intelligent. She is the baby of my home. I doubt l will have the courage to tell her the truth, call me a coward. It's perfectly okay.
ReplyDeleteThis one is hard oooo and I know this is not the right thing to do but this is what I'll do. I'll Get the mother to sign custody over to your family and convince your brother to let you adopt the baby. You can also contact a welfare worker for a better advice
ReplyDeleteThis is probably what I would do too.
DeleteDarling, there are adoption laws operating in Nigeria. You can't just sign over custody to a family because you don't want or can't take care of your child. Even when both parties agree, the child welfare service and the family court must be involved. This is not a simple contract where you sign over rights on an agreement in presence of witnesses. Without the family courts' seal of approval, that agreement is worthless.
DeleteFrom experience, most family courts in Nigeria will not grant the adoption of a girl child, an infant at that, to a single guy. They hardly grant adoption to single women as well. Even when couples come for adoption, it does always go smoothly, sometimes, the court refuses to grant the adoption. There are certain prerequisites that must be in place before the adoption process will be successful. The only single lady I know who adopted twins successfully, is highly connected and loaded. She's in her late forties and is divorced.
If it were that easy, a lot of children would have been adopted by now.
My sister is better you return the child now Dan hurt urself in future wen they come for the child.
ReplyDeleteInteresting and it be nice you let those involved in this pickle know now.Nawa o!
ReplyDeleteI agree with SDK. Don't get into murky waters that will drown you in future.
ReplyDeleteMake it clear to the baby mama that a DNA was done and the baby is not "yours" of course your Brother should do that. Don't give her options let her speak for herself.
SDK, there are people who love babies.
Just be careful. And you don't need to tell your parents your worth depending on what kind of people they are. Don't just show it, just do your bit.
You can become an envy when they find out. People who are waiting to bring you down can make good use of that news. Just keep it simple and low key.
You have a good nanny. But pls pray and ask for wisdom in how to go about this.
My brother, my dad made same mistake by accepting a child that isnt his about 50years ago. She is a huge pain in our hearts as she is out to destroy everything. Go start your life in peace. If you chose to adopt her, make sure all documentations are in place and she gets to know the truth when she comes of age. Otherwise, locate the mother
ReplyDeleteThis is what called "Ina akwo aka e tiri okuko aku"
ReplyDeleteUntil the child grows she would ask for her parents
She is the mother of the child,your Brother isn't;and you want to keep the child that you didn't adopt?
ReplyDeleteIt will end in tears,this is real life and not a movie..
Every move she made was calculated;your family has the fund she needs to take care of the child,and that is just it..
The best option so she can have a child to call hers in future just incase of uncertainty in her line of "business"..
In future;she will have balanced and then come for the child;and God help you with the allegations she will put on you and your family(if she wouldn't say your family forced the child out of her plus kidnapped her and then you travelled abroad illegally with her child)..
She will play the "poverty" and "victim" card and nobody will listen or believe your side of the story..
Next thing she will say they heard you were molesting the child as she was growing..I pity you ooo
Please adopt her legally with the consent of her mum..
Watch her countenance when you tell her you know your brother isn't he child's father..
You really think a woman like her will keep a pregnancy without knowing who the biological father is?
@MARTINS
👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
DeleteThis is unfiltered truth
Martins you are wise ooo
DeleteSpot on bro👍
DeleteWould you have wanted to keep her if she isn't beautiful😐, you're just obsessed with her beauty,and I hope you have no bad intentions sha, I would have understood if you are a female
ReplyDeleteWhy are some of you so stupid? A child he has been taking care of as his niece? Don't you have nephews or nieces? so describing how pretty she is has now become an obsession that is unholy.....some of you are just wicked hearts who can never adopt another persons child...imagine the nonsense you people are thinking? Even Stella self follow join dey talk nonsense
DeleteThe way you had to make emphasis on her beauty🤔🤔🤔.... if she wasn't beautiful would you still feel this way? Is it her physical appearance that's making you feel this way, or she's a sweet child in everyway?
ReplyDeleteFirst what is the obsession with the kid? forgive me though.
ReplyDeleteSecond, It will end in premium tears because that babe knows who the real father of the child is, she is only trying to play smart because she thought you guys wont have money to do DNA as we all know how expensive it can be.
3rd the embassy will not allow you go with a child who has no DNA match with you or even an adopted child without the necessary document.
and trust me it can be stressful and might lose the child.
so, Involve the mother of the Child and she wont even allow you take the child because she might want to use that opportunity to turn you to a money bag.
use wisdom abeg. I don overthink the thing and so many things don pop up for my head already.
Whatever you do, do it legally and legitimately.
ReplyDeleteTell the mother o. Let her know you want to adopt the kid. Do all these the right way, so u don't end up filled with regrets later. That baby is not for your family so she has a lot of rights .
ReplyDeleteIn all these things you've said, my own is that I want to date you.
ReplyDelete😂 😂 😂
DeleteMtchewwww
DeleteWerey😂
Delete😂😂😂.. Kokolet, we think alike I swear
DeleteHe sounds like a cute guy sha..
I love you already poster..
please post your number 😘..
BV Yosola
Let her mother know so she can return to her
ReplyDeleteYou have a beautiful soul. But the fact still remains that she is not related to you by blood. Pray and commit everything to God's hand then you and your brother should confront the baby mama with the DNA result. Give her the option of taking her baby away or giving her up for adoption with you legally. If it is the will of God she will accept your offer. If not let her go with her baby although it will be painful to you. Not too long you will get married and have your own children by God's grace. Also discuss your intention with your brother since the baby came into the family through him and also inform your parents. God bless you.
ReplyDeleteHmmm...
ReplyDeleteMy 2cents.
Call the mother of the baby and make her know you guys are aware the baby isn't your brothers'( by showing her the DNA result) then ask her if she will let your family adopt the baby or if she will take her back.
If she agrees to let your family have the baby. Make her sign the necessary documents in the presence of a lawyer, then have the baby stay with your parents.You can be the one sponsoring her( the baby) even while you go abroad.
I won't advice you travel with the baby,especially now that you're aware she isn't your blood...the devil might trigger you to have something silly with her tomorrow (forgive me, but this happens).
If you can't do this, pls give up the baby, you have nothing to loose.
But then, you can still sponsor her education (the childs') even if she decides to have the baby...that's where you truly love this baby and desire a good life for her.
The mother obviously want a bright future for her child, that'why she pinned her on your brother.
Adopt the baby...possible the mum doesn't even know the father.
ReplyDeleteReturn the child to her mother. Arrrgggh
ReplyDeleteI know returning the child to her mum is the right thing to do but it's not that easy when you have a strong bond with the child.
DeleteWhich strong bond at 8 months?? Is it not better now than when the child is 8years. Biko return the child asap and when you are ready 'birth your own beautiful and cute kids'. Abi you won't marry and give birth to your own kids? So what will you tell you future wife? What will you tell your future kids? You will carry unhealthy obsession instead of focusing on your own family and life?
DeleteNo adoption nothing, just return the baby.
The girl is a smart undergraduate. She will definitely collect her child after school. She just wanted a temporary arrangement
Hmmm... I can so relate with this poster.
ReplyDeleteIn my own case, when I was pregnant with my triplet last year, my husband's sis got me a little girl of seven to be my companion since my husband is hardly around due to the nature of his job.
She pays the child's family. Actually, we are the second family she is staying with. Her family (her grandparent. Their unmarried daughter gave birth to her and abandoned her with them) gave her up to be house maid so they will be receiving payment every month.
When she came to stay with me, I enrolled her in a be good school, I took her for all necessary medical test and got her some new clothes, panties, footwears etc. I took care of her as if she were my own daughter. I will wake up early in the morning to prepare her for school and pray with her before going to drop her off at school. When she comes back, after her lunch and homework she will gist me till evening. She loves staying with me while I prepare dinner. At the end of the day I read her bedtime stories and pray with her. I grew so fond of her.
Three months into her staying with us (I was close to my EDD), one of the nights I went to tuck her in as usual and she said, "good night MUM, I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH". I was motionless. Right there and then I realised that I too has already fallen helplessly in love with 'my daughter'. Few days later, I lovingly asked her why she called me mum, she said, she prayed to God for her real mum to come and take care of her and God brought me (my baby girl is so intelligent and smart). Right there and then, I knew I have a first child already. Ever since then I keep praying to God not to let me fail her.
Now I have given birth and I don't want to let her go. I can't let her family raise my daughter. I want to keep her. I want full legal right over her. I have contacted her family, her biological mum inclusive and they want me to pay 5million naira to "buy her".
I just don't know how to go about this. I don't want to give up my daughter. The first child to call me mum.#CRYING
Good to read this from a Nigerian lady.
DeleteBut please, if you pay that 5m, will there be a legal paper?
Of course not. It will be termed child trafficking.
The most important thing is to keep treating this girl as your
child and keep very close contact with her, even if she leaves.
As it is, she won't want to leave. But her family will want to pull
your legs to rip you off. Please do not give in to them.
The child knows her mommy already. Invest in that child. Even if
her parents want her back, tell them that you have offered to
train her to university level.
Discuss all these with your husband.
😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘
I feel sorry for you. Don't fall into their trap. Return the girl to her family. I'm sorry but she isn't your daughter.
DeleteWhat a wicked family. They want to sell their child. Tomorrow, you'll be framed for child trafficking.
5 million? Once you start paying, I feel that begins money swindling from you.
DeleteHumbly continue as you wish, once they need her, they come for her, let relationship between you and the family be fluid please.
Once they sense your desperation, you will be "used"
Just let things flow.. No need to get all caught up emotionally.
Humans are emotional, logical reasoning must always supercede, no matter what.. Be logical I beg thee.
Hugs🤗🤗
This brought tears to my eyes,don't give them a dime they will turn you into an ATM.
DeleteGod bless you for giving this little girl a better life.
DONT PAY ANY MONEY.. NO TRY AM.. E GO HOOK YOU FOR NECK LIKE SMAKE BONE OO.
DeletePLEASE DONT PAY... HOW I WISH NO GO BE YOUR PURSHON O
Just tell them that you are not buying the child as she is rightly theirs but you will take care of her like yopur own child. Don't pay fafafafowl to anyone.
DeleteThank you all for your response. The truth is the money is not the issue by God's grace my husband and I are very financially capable but I want everything pertaining my daughter to be legal.
DeleteThe initial arrangement my sister-in-law had with her family was for her to stay with me till I give birth and she paid for the duration of time. Now, I have given birth and my sister in-law thinks it is time for her to go back to her family. I told her, I want to keep my daughter. She just told me that I will have to continue the monthly payment. Money is not my issue like I said but I just feel its awkward paying her family every month. I know if I kick against the monthly payment thing they will take her away and send her to the next family willing to pay. I just want the vicious cycle to stop in her life. I just want her to have a normal life. Is this too much to ask for?
My daughter has brought so much love, light and laughter in my family. Even my husband adores her. I can't just give up. How can I legally adopt her because her family is not fit to raise her.
If you want to, try to adopt this child by legal means. Or else, you could be sitting on a keg of gunpowder.
DeleteHow do y'all become so easily attached? How is it done?
DeleteMadam pay the monthly dues, e no go pass 10k per month. She is not yours' and will practically never be. She knows her parents and when she grows up she will unite with them. She is 8years now so kindly pay till she is 16 and done with secondary school. Console yourself that you would have brought up a fine young woman with a bright future. We are all caretakers even to the children we birth. Only God is our owner.
DeleteMadam with the nicest heart, pls continue paying them the monthly due cos with the way you feel for this little girl, it won't be easy for you to let go.So rather decide to be paying,then when she reach May be 18years, I'm sure she won't adopt that idea anymore and would love to live with you freely and take you as her mom.
DeleteGod bless you goodtime
"At 22 I made a lot of money..." From what exactly?
ReplyDeleteWhenever a Nigerian says he made a lot of money, I know where my mind goes to.
smells like yahoo,yahoo
DeleteWhere do ur mind go to
DeleteStupid shooter of course your own mind will always think the worst....fool
DeleteDear sir, unless you succeed in adopting that child, what you're contemplating is on all fours with kidnapping. In the eyes of the law, kidnapping mustn't be done by scary individuals armed with all sorts. A biological father can be charged with kidnapping his own child if he wasn't awarded custody but decided to kept the child instead of returning the child to the parent vested with legal custody. You see how your situation can go south very fast?
ReplyDeleteI don't see how you can travel out with an infant or a child without her biological or adopted mother, moreso when you are not related to the child by consanguinity or legal adoption. Sir, I know babies are adorable and pretty babies even more so. However I'm not comfortable with your reasons for wanting this baby. That a baby's "beauty has started glowing" and that she is "veeeeery cute" is certainly not a good reason for adoption. The bond you feel flows from the beauty of this baby and that's a tad unsettling.
That's a child, not a doll baby. Are you sure you have what it takes to take care and nurture a child? Nurturing isn't about money and a nanny, those only goes to the comfort factor. Are you ready to create time for that child? Are you ready to sacrifice a budding career for that child? Will you drop everything for her in case of a medical emergency? Will you stay up all night watching her just to make sure a fever breaks? You cannot delegate a father's duty to a hired help, no sir. Fatherhood is no joke.
Assuming you answer "yes" to my questions, by the time your life is preoccupied with this child, what room would be left for your social life? Don't you want to get married and have a child or children of your own? Speaking of, I hope you know once a baby is on board, your romantic life has to be seriously scrutinised because you can't just bring any lady home and expose her to this child. You both are now a package deal. The lady you want to date must accept you and the bady. Have you really thought this through?
If you've caught the baby bug, why not start a family soon, so you can have as many beautiful babies as you please and they can grow in a loving environment? That child should be returned to her mum sooner rather than later because the longer she remains, the more difficult it will be to let her go which, inevitably, is the logical conclusion.
Excellent advice Ronalda.
DeleteRonald a shut up abet...your oversabi is irritating sometimes....did you sit down to answer all these questions before getting pregnant? Those of us who are parents were just in love with the tots of our own kids and we started to consider some of these things as they happened. I do not see his describing her beauty as any thing else but just trying to let us know how cute the baby is. For Gods sake he raised this girl like from birth and it was all with the though she was his niece. You think he is stupid and don't know what fatherhood entails? If she still was will you all be talking about obsession? Honestly all these responses are so irritating to my ears...poster just return that child to the mother but pls help with her upkeep to clear your conscience
DeleteAm sure the lady knows the person that got her pregnant but maybe the person denied her that's why she pushed it to your brother.you should discuss it with your brother and parent after which you all should summon her with your finding and watch her action. If she's willing to sign documents drafted by a lawyer and you pass her some amount to adopt the child as yours.
ReplyDeletePoster, please return the child to the mother. Tomorrow, when that child grows up, she'll look for her real parents and they'll make up stories that will make you look bad. Currently happening in my family. The children went to look for their father and now their who took care of them from when they are young have now become a wizard in their eyes thanks to their mother.
ReplyDeleteIf you love kids so much, please get married and have your own or adopt.
Return the child to the girl's family not just to the girl. Add a copy of the DNA results for clarification. Go and start your own family and have your own kids pls.
ReplyDeleteOh bruh.. I feel ur pains like Siamese twins gum by brains..pls let the girl know sup and if she's willing to let u adopt the baby then fine... Stay safe!
ReplyDeletePlease tell your mom, the mother of the child the truth and let everything be. You can decide to adopt the child later on.
ReplyDeletei cant help but think that this is a fake write up and that you are taking a dig at somebody.....please seriously restore the humour in your blog. Really how many people will contemplate adopting a child that is not their own.....Abeg please write about common real life issues that people are battling with....enough of all this digs.
ReplyDeleteYour comment is the most stupid one here...olodo....so people who do adoption are from mars abi? It is Nigerians like you who discourage others from adoption....wicked local bush idiot
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DeleteWhy is no one talking about the fact that this person keeps raving on and on about the baby's beauty, that's a red flag on it's own sir. Please, leave the baby and her mother alone. Your 'attraction' to her is unhealthy.
ReplyDeletePoster you is a joker; you think nursery fees are a joke in abroad. UK for example that’s nothing less than 1k pounds per month on average even outside London included but unless you want to use unregistered child minders which I can never ever recommend. When they start school nko holiday club breaskfast club and afterschool club is not a joke don’t try it. Give that child back if child is hungrying you go and marry and born your own baby.
ReplyDeleteThat’s my free advice with no interest
Wicked soul, your type will never extend help to another child but your own....this mentality is why adoption is still frowned on in Naija. Very bad mentality
DeleteAnon are you sick!!!!! Where in my write up did I mention not to extend help. I simply drew the poster a picture of responsibilities around having a child in the UK from a personal experience because those in Nigeria seem to think take a child to abroad is fun and games till reality hits. If he wants to adopt let him go ahead and through the right channels by also notifying the mother of the truth that the child is not his brother’s child. Having a child in a 2 parent home is hard let alone being a single father in the abroad.
DeleteDo you even know me offline or how many children I look after home and abroad to type this your rubbish comment.
If you haven’t eaten today and you’re angry just say that instead of typing rubbish next time!!!
Guy e be like say you dey mad.. To just slap you dey hungry me
ReplyDeletePoster please don't even listen to all those imagining, making unecessry emphasis and accusing you of what you don't know.Their mind is already messed up with the things we hear and see in this corrupt world.
ReplyDeleteSo please all I can say is that you have a good heart and God will bless you, amen.
So please kindly follow the adoption process,ensure you do everything legally by informing the said girl.I fully undersntd how you will feel letting go incase the mom refused to go with your plans,but please you have to Man up and let go if things didn't work out the way you expect.
I would even suggest if you don't inform her about the paternity but make sure you get her to sign the necessary documents and let your brother encourage her to give in to the adoption plan .
Goodluck
Dear Poster, I am completely in support of Stella's red note. Please do not take that baby, your obsession for that baby calls for serious concern, the baby is not yours and she's not your brother's baby. If you really want to have a baby then have your own baby. It is inappropriate for you to show interest in taking a little baby out of the country, she is too little to for that, and she is not your biological baby, if you try it the embassy might get you arrested. Please make the DNA result known to everybody, both your mom and the mother of the baby. Give the baby back to the mother. If you keep the baby without letting everyone know about the DNA result you will suffer a big and bad consequences in the nearest future. Stop being obsessed about the baby, stop it.
ReplyDeleteP.S: If you must adopt the baby you must do it in a legal way, everybody must know that the baby is not your and not your brothers, and legal documents must be signed to proof that you legally adopted the baby to take care of her. Please you need to calm down and stop being obsessed about the baby, do the right thing.