STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
FARTING ISH
Please I need urgent help before I lose it.
I am newly married and was a virgin and I have never had any contact with any man, during honeymoon, my husband deflowered me, painful but sweet feelings.
After months of making love and learning styles, I noticed anytime I give him head he usually farts, the first time it was very smelling I stopped stylishly, he pretended he didn't know the reason I stopped. Second time he farted, I stopped also, can you believe he called me for a talk and asked me in a very sweet way why I pollute the air anytime I give him head?
Stella I got confused and told him he was the one always giving me the silent fart.
Stella, my husband didn't believe he is the one messing oh. Now he is carrying face and me I face my front, now mess is causing trouble, we are only 9 months in the marriage. I feel really disgusted with his fart, he denied farting and he loves bj.. See me see wahala, gush.
Could it be he is carried away and does not know?it is indeed really disgusting to be down there and someone farts into your nose..OMG!!!!
My dear,if you cannot settle who farts,then stop giving him blow job abeg you....
Hian!!! See flimsy excuse in a relatively young marriage. Your husband is petty.
ReplyDeleteAs in very flimsy excuse to hurt his wife.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteBuy fart-o-meter to help determine the direction the fart comes from. Abi?
DeleteProblem solved. Inukwam chronicles!
This is funny af! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteVery funny ooo😂😂🤣🤣🤣
DeleteThere's nothing one will not see in this institution called marriage😂😂😂😂😂. I don laugh tire, i don't even know what to say again ontop fart matter. Madam abeg stop giving him bj biko
Wahala for givers and receivers of head.
DeleteNa wa ooo eleyi gidi gan😂
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣 Stella your red pen is what is making me laugh hard
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣 there's nothing 1 won't read in this blog (chronicle), but why will he be denying his farts now 💔🤣
DeleteEwwwwww so nasty! Ah Ahnnn
DeleteYou should have stopped giving him BJ from the very first time it happened, that way, everyone knows what’s up!
DeleteStop giving him blow job. Just have normal set with him.
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 what a bang into a new week!
ReplyDeleteYou are a clown 😂😂😂💀😂😂😂
DeleteMaybe your husband is a gay, stop giving him head before u contract Corona virus, a word is enough for the wise, and stop complaining about your marriage, is too early, if u had tested before marriage, u would have noticed her farts, very shameless man.
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 fart = corona virus.
DeleteWhat an assumption, na wa...gay ?
DeleteFunnily my 3 year old just let out a very loud fart and he shouted his name in a very funy way. I just cant help laughing.
DeleteAngelray4sdk, is back? Ope oooo welcome back Sir/MA.
DeleteThis is funny to read. He farts when you give him a BJ? That will just kill the whole thing for me. Ah ah. But wait o,is there no way to record it, that way you'll have proof of who farted. Na question oo
ReplyDeletePerson dey give you BJ you dey mess? Itunmo?.. You even come deny join!
DeleteBJ ti tan niyen o.. Kosi BJ mo 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
Poster your husband is using reverse psychology on you.
DeleteAbeg Tade ❤, English ooo
DeleteLol candy.. It means no more BJ, BJ don finish.. popopo finish!!! 😂
DeleteThat guy should just get over it. Na d sweetness dey cause'am.
DeleteHow can he not know he is thr one farting? Arrrggggghhhhhh he is just trying to turb the tables on you. He should fear God.
ReplyDeleteThis is a turn off,WTF don't give him blow job anymore!!!
DeleteMaybe he has a fart fetish secretly but doesn't wanna tell the wife. She too when he is giving her head she should let out a very smelly watery fart so he knows the feeling. Since every one wants to be mad na
DeleteHes simply a bully..ignore his childish tantrums. My friend with benefit did same in an hotel.when I confronted him he said the smell was coming from outside.That was our last encounter though hes very generous..Minimum £300 whenever we hook up but that smell was bad.
ReplyDeleteWhich yeye friends with benefits? You be hoe-losho!
Delete😳😳😳😳😳
DeleteYou will soon eat shit for £300.
He will soon poopoo on your head untop £300
DeleteJust say your customer, we no go kill you, na your body you sell.
DeletePoverty mentality is worrying you lots..My boyfriend is into I T so what's eating poo got to do..Since we can't marry each other for reason best known to us, wont I get some goodies for keeping his company. Know your worth guys and stop fcking for recharge cards
DeleteSo your worth is 💷 300? You're damn too expensive.🤷🏾♀️
DeleteSo your worth is 💷 300? You're damn too expensive.🤷🏾♀️
DeleteMy people allow anon to tell her experience nau.
DeleteYes..that's what he gives weekly. Calculate that in a month💃💃💃💃
DeleteSee this fool! Your worth is £300?! Paid sex is the lowest any human can go. Girls doing it for free is better than you if you don't know.
Delete😂😂😂😂😂😂. Na wa. When he does it again pinch him. Immediately oh
ReplyDeleteHahahahhahahahahhaha
Delete😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
ReplyDeleteNa lie... him sabi say na him fart, na so men dey. Always putting wanting women to take the blame for everything.
ReplyDeleteChronicle of the year 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😭🤣😂😭😭😭😭🤣😂🤣
ReplyDeleteAs in, this sh*t is so funny 🤣 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteSince I opened this chronicle, I have been laughing my head off.
What a disgusting act. Dear poster, stop giving him BJ. It's as simple as that. What sort of an inconsiderate husband is this? He is only interested in being pleasured but care less about the "giver" of the pleasure.
ReplyDelete#clicks tongue
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Wahala wear boxers. Na this matter we go settle today o, who come dey MESS now? Baba say no be him, Madam say na OGA!!! Anyway, may una MESS turn into a divine MESSAGE!!!
ReplyDeleteGirl, make you no allow fart end your marriage o.
ReplyDeleteCall oga and talk. Tell him that what God has joined together, fart should not separate o.😜😜😜😜😜😜
Kudos for being a virgin till marriage.
Is it not on one of Stella's facts post I read that smelling of fart builds up resistance in the body........ Na bloody wa.......
DeleteNo give am blow job again.
ReplyDeleteWhat rubbish. Atleast if he wants to fast he should have the decency holding his smelly fast, of pull out and excuse himself.
Poster you can return the favor when he is giving you head.
DeleteWow! What a chronicle, so hilarious, continue to face front poster and follow Stella advice.
ReplyDeleteNawaooo, nothing way we no go see for this blog.
DeleteGood to read that there are still virgins in Nigeria till marriage. Please be sure Jesus is your Lord and Savior.
ReplyDeletePlease settle these farting issues amicably and enjoy your marriage. 😎😎
Sure there are virgins but they are not all Christians.
DeleteGod bless you for that response Sapphire
DeleteSorry I had to laugh..😁😁 you guys should do 69, once u perceive the usual mess odour, jump up n say ehen, u don mess.
ReplyDelete😆😆😆😆😆🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😆😆😆😆😆😆😆, @Blackberry...please stop 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteThe comments are just tew much.
Hahahahahhahahahahaha
Delete😂😂😂😂
Delete🤣🤣🤣
DeleteWell... Poster though its funny, but I think you should considere BB's suggestion.
DeleteLMAO
Delete😂😂😂😂 My belle oooo
DeleteBut some of you ladies pass urine during orgasm and say that you are "squirting"
ReplyDeletePease allow the man to squirt too. 😂😂😂😂😂
Always sounding like a lunatic! What’s the scientific reason for a man to pass out smelly fart. Not like it’s during when he’s about to cum.
Delete@Aproko
DeleteWhat's the scientific reason for a lady to pass urine during intercourse? 🙄🙄
Anon. Na una men wey dey find woman wey dey squirt na..na wetin u use cause problem for una self. Guess the ladies peeing on you want to feel sexy and among..enjoy it dear
DeleteThis is funny. I like Stella advice but give him head one more time and if he fart again, just stop and starting shouting "baby you have started messing again and later you will be accusing me falsely". Make small shame catch am.
ReplyDelete😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 Just nasty!
DeleteWho fart, who no fart, how many fart you fart and who fart is causing problem in a marriage less than one year.
ReplyDeleteMadam you and your man should resolve your issue with fart, is possible when your husband fart he will not notice it or could it be possible that someone did that to him in the past that anytime someone gives him head let him always fart.
Ask for God's wisdom to handle this issue before your marriage goes south. Please be calm about it, have heart to heart discussion with your man before this matter gets out of hands.
Nawa o. But can someone fart and not know? emotional blackmail. That is why I like myself, once he fart, I will tell him immediately to sort it out. You pretended and now he is turning it against you. No 1 lesson, talk things over immediately it happens to avoid this kinda drama in the future.
ReplyDeleteSimply emotional blackmail and you are so right! She never should have pretended!! This is what gave him license to insist on it!
DeleteExactly! She coulda told him immediately
DeleteGod bless you o. In fact the first time I would shout Fuuuuuuuuuuum and run to the toilet to vomit.
DeleteThis is generally a good communication strategy for couples.
Delete🤭🤭🤭😂😂😂😂😂😂 I actually laughed out loud inside the brt I entered na so everyone dey give me side eyes madam don't give him head period
ReplyDeleteI just remembered that yoruba comedy movie ''Jelili'' kai 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteYou should have married "Fatai" jejely lol.. abeg naija prob pass this.. laughing publicly and peeps go dey reason me
ReplyDeleteLolzzzz
ReplyDeleteThis SDK blog ehn
The burden has been lifted by this chronicle.
😂😂😂
Very funny😂, But on a serious note, Your husband is a very cunny man, You made the mistake of ignoring him the first time , you should have told him to stop farting With a big smile on your face. By now, he would have stopped, But you decided to pretend about it.
ReplyDeleteNow you do everything you can to save your marriage, because being a virgin does not change an emotional blackmailing man or physically abusive man, he's showing you his real colors, He is teaching you, that he could blackmail you emotionally,Do not take this lightly, trash this issue out now, poster sort your marriage out asap, na from clap eh dey enter dance.
Na wa ooo.......... The sky is falling! 🐥
DeleteKukuma stop now!! Make wahala no dey!! Damn imagine kpu! kpu!! direct into your nasal cavity 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDelete😆😆😆😆😆😆🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteOh, the comments 😆😆😆😆😂😂😂😂
Not even Lionel Messi can understand this mess.
ReplyDeleteBut that your husband is petty sha.
Even if na you dey fart, as a man he should just overlook it and continue enjoying the bj you dey give am, shebi you be him babe. Now no more bj.
Meanwhile na pleasure fart which is caused by the sweetness of the bj, maturity requires that he should just apologise and pet you so that you can continue with the bj. Hope his immaturity in handling this small issue will not spread into other areas of your young marriage.
Who mess am na ojo,ojo say na teacher,teacher say no worry na our clasa pipu mess am poooo
ReplyDeleteThis chronicle funny. Abeg make I laugh small🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteThis is so annoying.
ReplyDeleteNext time, call his attention to it immediately. Emotional blackmail is so not right.
Dirty man,if na me I go spank his ass or I will shout immediately,dt can't he tell me he want to fart?next time tell him immediately he fart,am sure he will stop.
ReplyDeleteOk poster the solution to this is to apologise to him and don't give head again, for peace to reign in your marriage. Next time please don't be naive, once he does anything you don't like or is irritating let him know immediately with plenty of drama. Becos this kind of men can finish someone with emotional blackmail and abuse.
ReplyDeleteApologise for what? That she was the one that farted abd was denying it? @Poster, please don't apologise for what you have not done! Abd that is one habit I must instill on my children. Dont give any bj again. Let him try it elsewhere abd fact on the person. Konsense and bj farming!
Deletegood advice
DeletePoster do not apologize to him. He is an emotion blackmailer
DeleteApologizing does not mean he's right, it's just for peace to reign. He can win in this but he shouldn't in the next and ever. She have to learn to act smarter than him.
DeletePut your butt close to his face when giving him head so he can be perceiving to know who farts. So when he farts and he knows the smell is not from you if he is not troublesome he would apologize
ReplyDeleteGive him a Stern warming When next he asked for it.if he doesn't listen to you then please stop.the feeling is not funny at all🤒🤒🤒
ReplyDeleteGirl, you Will get a cloth and spray plenty perfume on it and cover his anus while doing it. I hope it will help
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣 I don laugh tire for here
ReplyDeletePeople around me are wondering why I'm laughing so much
I really don’t know why men do this, when I first got married to my husband, he used to fart and snore a lot in his sleep even while awake, infact the rooms were always full of unpleasant smelI, he won’t even flush the toilet properly after use. I just couldn’t stand it no more so I had to confront him and demanded he stop and be at least be discreet. First day I confronted him, he denied vividly and we had a very serious altercation, so I came up with the idea of always recording him when snores and fart in his sleep. He shamefully apologised and started working on it.
ReplyDeleteI really don’t know why men do this, when I first got married to my husband, he used to fart and snore a lot in his sleep even while awake, infact the rooms were always full of unpleasant smelI, he won’t even flush the toilet properly after use. I just couldn’t stand it no more so I had to confront him and demanded he stop and be at least be discreet. First day I confronted him, he denied vividly and we had a very serious altercation, so I came up with the idea of always recording him when snores and fart in his sleep. He shamefully apologised and started working on it.
ReplyDeleteMy dear I also had an argument with my husband concerning this snoring thing o, not only did I record it , I will also wake him immediately to tell him he's snoring and that he should change sleeping position as many times I can in the night.
DeleteI really don’t know why men do this, when I first got married to my husband, he used to fart and snore a lot in his sleep even while awake, infact the rooms were always full of unpleasant smelI, he won’t even flush the toilet properly after use. I just couldn’t stand it no more so I had to confront him and demanded he stop and be at least be discreet. First day I confronted him, he denied vividly and we had a very serious altercation, so I came up with the idea of always recording him when snores and fart in his sleep. He shamefully apologised and started working on it.
ReplyDeleteI wonder the type of relationship you have with your husband, whereby you have to pretend and swallow fart.... it’s something I would have exclaimed loudly about and we would have laughed about it. I mean what’s with the prim and proper act? Until someone kills you with mess. You guys are still forming for each other. When we were growing up, my dad used to fart loudly once in a while and we would pretend as if we no hear. But when our last born came, omo..whenever he does that, she will shout and say “daddy, you farted”😂😂😂. We will all laugh
ReplyDeleteWho mess? na bola. Bola say na teacher. Teacher say don't worry. a b c d ah tus 🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteI wan die for laugh here 😭 🤣 😂
DeleteStop giving him bj.
..lol...nde givers academy
ReplyDelete