Hmmm...
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSED OVER BOYFRIENDS STRANGE ATTITUDE:
Hello...
I am lady, and I am 22 years old , I have been a relationship with this guy ( who is every much older than me) over a year plus, and I love this guy ,so much, he loves me too, so he said , he treats me good too ...
What bothers me is that whenever I am with this guy , he will always say that he wants God to bless him with a good wife, and that his wife is going to enjoy him, the same guy who told me that he is coming to see my parents very soon..
People are coming for me and I keep turning them down ,even my first love got married when I told him that I am no longer interested ,all because of this guy ,I am not desperate and I am not ready to marry yet cos I want to build my own business first before marriage, this guy will always wants me to be a great woman, but doesn't contribute to make me a woman he wants, and when he talks about the future i am not always there, but he will keep telling me he love me.
I am concerned because I don't want to waste my time on someone else things , Stella please I need advice on what to do please ...
*Hmmmm are you not free to ask him questions? Is the age difference limiting you to question why he says he loves you but keep asking God for a wife?
Please sit him down for a conversation and ask him what he wants from you...Also ask him why he keeps asking God for a wife and says he wants to meet your parents......
I tire oh..
ReplyDeleteLearn to always ask questions on anything I find confusing. Don't deal on assumption. And this principle is not limited to only relationship, fix it into every aspect of your life.
Remain blessed
You're dating a certified time waster, lord of the ring giver , emerging pedophile. Oriegwu oo
DeleteDon't ask or talk to him about it. You know why? Because that is exactly where he wants you. He needs you pining and grovelling for him.
DeleteNne guess what? He is the one that should be palpitating and worrying if he is in your future plans and he knows it. You have all the advantages on your side and he knows it;
1. You are very young and yes, the world should revolve around you.
2. You have other suitors and yes, you should subtly let him know that.
3. You are building your business even without his support and yes, you should be supper proud of yourself.
4. You are not desperate and yes, you should let it show that marriage is not your immediate plan.
5. He is not a supportive partner and yes, he is never gonna change in marriage.
Nne, FOCUS. FOCUS. FOCUS and build that business before all these "catch them young" men takes advantage of you and limits you in the name of marriage.
Personally I will advice you concentrate on meeting more friends, attend seminars, invest in connections of value between now and the next 6 to 8 years befor thinking marriage. For now, a commited relationship with an older man is the last thing you need.
Talk with him.
ReplyDeleteLadies, never leave a man that is a potential cos of another you ain't sure of yet.
Nawa o!A 22 years old for that and it's such a pity
ReplyDeletePoster you need to define what you are doing? And the first question to ask is what do you want for yourself? You said you aint ready to marry so you can start your business and in the same vein saying you don't know if this guy wants to marry you?
ReplyDeleteYou said he is over a year older than you. Then i suppose he is 2 or 3 years older than you.
Are you afraid of talking to him becos he is older than you? Or are you afraid that you will look desperate to him?
Honestly when a man knows what he wants, he goes after it and will be afraid to loose you so he does the proper thing of meeting your parents. Obviously this guy may not be seeing you in the future and most times it will be expressed or his actions shows it but as women we are only moved by what we hear.
Look a man who knows what he wants. But the question again is what do you want?
If you cannot talk to your man because you are afraid or what, then you aint in the right relationship. You guys ought to be friends who should be free to talk about anything.
Dont loose yourself becos you want to be a part of someone's life. Marriage is for 2 whole solid people not half and half people.
Have a conversation with him and then you will know your next step. All the best.
He is wayyyyyyy older than her.
DeletePhoenix, poster said he is much older than her but they have been in a relationship for over a year.
DeleteYou got that mixed up.
Be like say make I stone this Poster with sense.
ReplyDeleteBaby girl, you can and will do better.
That man is not yours.
To prove this, when next he asks God for a wife in your presence, ask God to clear your path and give you your own husband.
Hopefully you guys will have that much needed conversation you both need to move on with your lives.
Poster take this advice, I did this and let’s just say thank God I did on time.
DeleteWhen you are with a guy and he keeps saying my wife will this or that then better start thinking with your head and not your heart cos you are not in that guys plan for a wife.... yea anything can happen and things can change but most times you are never in the picture.
P.S:: that doesn’t mean there are no guys who deceive girls with “you are my wife” talk .. you just have to follow your instincts and be wise
Thank you jare. You have my type of heart.
DeleteMe, I will follow you and shout a resounding Amen! Then also join own prayer too audibly, asking God for a good husband.
That way both of us can finally talk the talk and decide on where we stand.
Life is a game. You need to learn to play it well.
Poster! dont bother asking him any questions jare. He's got no plans for you !!!! Pick your slippers, pack your breasts for hand make you pick race from this time waster. Awon puff daddy geng
ReplyDeleteSometimes women confuse me sha!!! Why are you afraid to ask the man you're dating questions?!!! Haba!!!!
ReplyDeleteExactly! Me immediately u say that the first time I will ask you what it means. Poster don't waste any more time abeg
DeleteBaby geh! No follow am discuss anything jare. Just fling ya slippers, hold your two bobby for hand, fly fence and pick race. He is a time waster! Awon puff daddy geng
ReplyDeleteAt 22, please focus on your punctuation.
ReplyDeleteSo that someone can read what you have to say and not be supremely confused.
Thank you!@16:10.
DeleteAnon 16:10, you should focus on learning how to write a proper sentence so people can better grasp your point. Also perfect your use of punctuations - Especially full stop. *Walking out*
DeleteIt is not a big deal.Just ask him to define the relationship,so as to know your stand.
ReplyDeleteAsk and ye shall recieve answers, from the response, the answer ye seek shall suffice.
ReplyDeleteWomen! Someone told you he is searching for a wife even with you by his side and you're still writing chronicle. Young lady, cut off from that man. Block him everywhere! When you chance upon him and he asks, tell him you want to give him space to find a wife. He is not a time waster. You are the one wasting your time.
ReplyDeleteTell him the truth that you are not ready to marry now. Then concentrate on building your life. Guy is just using you to shine his knob. Or are you not giving him the cookie? He may even be stylishly telling you that the relationship has no future but you are only hearing the "I love you". Love gbakwa oku.
By the way, why are you in a relationship when you are not ready to marry. You are just spraying the fragrance of your youth on someone else's husband. By the time your own husband comes your bottle will be entirely empty. And marriage will be a drag.
Be wise. Be guided.
No need to ask,he says those stuff so that you will get the message since you don't understand his body language of not expecting too much from him.
ReplyDeleteNow you said he does nothing to help you grow,why then are you stuck with him?
Silently walk away,that way you will earn your respect
Can we for once be able to distinguish between;
ReplyDelete"I love you" and
"I LUST after you"
The second one means, I "love' the fornication I am getting from you.
That is what I perceive is the case here, though you did not mention it.
A lot of men want to marry someone they haven't had sex with, more especially,
when the person hasn't aborted "for them"
That is the name of that spade if we want to call it by its name.
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Madam!!! You have some very deep issues and I don't know who or how you can be helped. Is this little girl not too young for you wicked assumptions?
DeleteTufiakwa gi! Azi gbakwa gi!!
Ms Saphire 👌, exactly the comment I posted (waiting for stella to release). Very wicked evil assumptions, says a lot about the state of her heart.
Delete@Ms Saphire
DeleteYou could simply have corrected all my perceived wrongs without all the insults both in English and Igbo. All I wrote was meant for the girl that posted in the Chronicle and not for you.
Bia, this poster, dem tie you rope put for the relationship? Which kind mugu you be sef? See, stay off him, switch off your phone, keep your distance for just a week then what ever the relationship is to him he will voice it out, if e no sweet you, my sister no time ooo find your way. Me I no get time to sit anybody down come dey ask am questions ooo. Oge adighi kwanuoooo. Aswerugad 🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶 we move, anyi apuoooo
ReplyDeleteYou don't need to ask any more questions the guy has already told you what you need to know about both of you. All you need to do is to enjoy the fun, friendship especially since you are not ready for marriage now while you build your business first.
ReplyDeleteIn the process of building your business please give space to others maybe you could meet a better person before the time you will be ready to settle down.
Poster, please at 22 why are you not dating someone within your age range than a much older man who seems not to have his acts together❓
ReplyDeletePlease, don't ask him any questions. Just move on. That man is a time waster.
When you are ready to marry, then get into a relationship with someone who wants to get married to you.
Don't believe in a man's word, believe in his actions, don't take whatever a man tells you seriously until you see him put it in action
ReplyDelete