Your Favoueite Nollywood actor Kenneth Okonkwo posted this great advice on Facebook...
Don't let anyone deceive you. You will quarrel and you will fight. You will have sad days; you will disagree some days and not find a common ground over some issues. Compromises don't always happen. These are normal things in a healthy relationship.
The key to a lasting relationship is being with someone you can actually communicate your feelings to and have a solutions-based approach towards conversations; someone who doesn't just communicates, but reciprocates the energy you give to them.
Someone who always bares their mind and accumulate pent-up anger. Someone who forgives easily and reverts to their default factory mode of playing and laughing. This is the key.
Good morning beloved fans''
Apt! 👌
ReplyDeleteVery true.
DeleteWhen I got married, at every slightest thing, my husband would threaten me with separation and divorce.
Hian.
It always got to me. It was a total absolute nightmare. And he knew.
I can remember one time we had issues and after not speaking to me for days, he calls me to the dinning table and tells me that we have to separate. Citing reasons why we can’t live together.
It broke me in so many ways.
I reached out to our mentors and they came and spoke to us and things got okay.
If I remember correctly, I think he did jt some other time. It made me so apprehensive as I didn’t want a broken marriage and I knew God brought us together.
Apparently, that was his toxic way of keeping me in check. It was so bad and I also didn’t fail to mention how much I hated those threats whenever we became Chummy and good.
After some months, we had an issue. He started again with his silent treatment and it got too hard for me to bear and so I went to him and mandated him to talk.
It got a bit rowdy and confrontational and he said he was getting a divorce. He went ahead to call a divorce lawyer in my presence.
I just ignored him.
After some days I went to him and asked him to call his family and my family and involve them so that we can return bride price. J also informed him that I had called some divorce lawyers and he would need to maybe move out or something so we can divorce properly when it’s time.
He was SHOCKED.
Omo, my heart was made up.
My husband that used to carry shoulder up became very mellow.
I asked out mentors not to call him.
That I want to show him the marriage isn’t my destiny.
After some days, they came and spoke to both of us. It was so glaring that my husband was shaken. He looked very dishevelled and rough. I on the other hand was glowing and happy.
My people, that was the end of divorce and separation threat in my marriage.
The END END END.
So issuing of threats js toxic and very wrong. It’s a form of manipulation and shouldn’t be encouraged.
Absolutely truth. I love this piece from him. Married people take note 😁😁😁
ReplyDeleteI agree with him
ReplyDelete"The key to a lasting relationship is being with someone you can actually communicate your feelings to".
ReplyDeleteThanks for this great advice, Andy Okeke 👍
It's hard to control words when angry.That particular breakup threat is my favourite line🤧
ReplyDeleteGod abeg o.
I use it a lot, unfortunately they took it serious and broke up with me. I beg tire.
Delete@ anon ..it must have been a shock to you ..some people don't like that threat at all...you'll find someone who loves you with all your faults
DeleteIssokay
ReplyDeleteI have taken note
ReplyDeleteWhere is the lie?
ReplyDeleteRun when there is domestic violence and emotional stress o
ReplyDeleteThis marriage matter is Draining a lot of people . I wish them well sha.
ReplyDeleteUka
I remember his marriage then to the young daughter of some daddy and mummy GO.
ReplyDeleteDis a fact
ReplyDeleteNice one
ReplyDeleteI’m so guilty of this may God help me. At the slightest inconvenience I just feel like running away and starting life all over🥺😭😭.
ReplyDeleteI can’t count how many times I’ve done mental calculations of how I will mannage my life as a single mother and even looked up apartments I m likely to rent and move out just because I don’t like the way my husband spoke to me😭🥺. Though I’ve never made any attempt at leaving but I’ve threatened so a few times.
And from my observations my 5yr old seem to have same tendencies any small scolding he will pack his bag and tell me he doesn’t want to live with us any more, that he wants to go live with his grandma or any where else.
Children and their love for grandma na anoda mata. Lol!!
DeleteAbsolute truth,do not threaten anyone.
ReplyDeleteSome one I dated from 2018 to 2021 August, then he stopped talking to me. I thought all sort of things I could have done wrong that will warrant such act. If you are not compatible why not communicate your feelings. Over time God healed me. Then boom August this year he called me I didn’t pick, then he sent me a message to please reach me as soon as possible. I declined. Why can’t people communicate and express themselves in relationships?
ReplyDeleteSHYLA
Keep running. No matter how imperfect you were in that relationship, he is worse news.
DeleteThat's good for him.
DeleteI screenshot this and sent to my hubby.We've enjoyed relative peace lately and a little argument this morning and he goes I'm tired and will definitely travel out next year'.I kuku said amen.
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteVery true, life itself is all about patient and endurance. Even siblings fight and settle.
ReplyDeleteThe truth is that one has to understand that when it comes to a union of Love, you most make sure you partner with patient, endurance and sercrifice except in a case of abuse. God help us all.
Never threaten anyone! They may just damn everything and call your bluff. You may regret the consequences afterwards no matter the initial grandstanding.
ReplyDeleteControl yourself and mind your words during heated disagreements. Some words pierce like sharp swords. The emotional scars they leave behind don't heal easily with some people.
Quarrel with wisdom!
noted so help me God
Delete👍
DeleteWisdom!!! 🔥🔥🔥
ReplyDeleteAlthough to be honest, there are times your spouse can frustrate you to the point where you say mean things that you don't mean. However, we must all learn to master our emotions and bridle our tongues especially when tension is high. Marriage nor easy o. But with the right teachings and the right partner, it is a very enjoyable ride!
May God bless our homes! 🙏
Amen.
DeleteGood advice. Noted with thanks
ReplyDeleteNice one Ken,some will still come out to claim they never argue, deceiving people up and down.
ReplyDeleteI'm telling you!
DeleteNice one Ken,some will still come out to claim they never argue, deceiving people up and down.
ReplyDeleteOkay
ReplyDeleteThank you
Saving this
ReplyDeleteBv ariella
U are so on point sir.thanks
ReplyDelete💯💯💯💯
ReplyDelete👌👌👌
ReplyDeleteSaying " I will leave you" na normal terms na,when quarrel dey.even my husband Will later come to ask me after we've settled if I truly meant it.All na threat, nothing dey happen
ReplyDeleteContinue. Shebi they are telling you to work on it and you’re saying nothing dey happen. No wahala, ngwanu continue.
DeleteYour belligerence is baffling.
DeleteWhy not learn to get better?
Nawa
So on point.
ReplyDeleteApt👌
ReplyDeleteFact👌
ReplyDeleteOkay. Thank you
ReplyDeleteI love this!👌
ReplyDeleteI agree with him
ReplyDelete