Thank you Stella for this platform, please I have situation on ground, i work and live in Abuja, while my parents and siblings stay in Port Harcourt.
I received a call from my mum and my kid sister crying, I was informed that my sister went to a Medical laboratory around her school to do some test, she had itching and discomfort, so she went to do HVS ( high v#ginal swap).
This girl is twenty and in her third year in the University, I am an advocate of proper medical investigation before any form of medication should be taken, and everyone follows it, the lab attendant brought a speculum ( it's an instrument used to open the v#ginal wall) and a swap stick with which will be used to collect the sample, my sister appealed to the lady if she can use the swap stick alone, that she is a VIR*** but the lady waved it off like she was lying, they can actually use the swap stick, it's just to get a little of the sample and do a culture and the result will be out in 48 hours:
She laid on the couch and her legs raised, the lady asked her colleague on the proper way to use it, she was not even sure on the usage, she inserted it so deep that this girl started bleeding seriously, her hymen broke, that was when she realized the girl was saying the truth all along.
My kid sister immediately called our mum to come to the lab, and that was the same time the owner came too, they said he was very angry at the attendant and apologized to my mum and sister.
I am very angry because this is a girl that is very reserved, i am not biased because she is my sister, she said she is going to keep herself until when she gets married, she has been crying and has difficulty to walk properly, I asked of the owner of the lab's number and I called him, at first he pretend like he can't remember what happened, when i introduced myself that was when he started explaining that he was not sure if the girl was a virgin that she was just scared and had laceration that's all.
I am very angry because this is a girl that is very reserved, i am not biased because she is my sister, she said she is going to keep herself until when she gets married, she has been crying and has difficulty to walk properly, I asked of the owner of the lab's number and I called him, at first he pretend like he can't remember what happened, when i introduced myself that was when he started explaining that he was not sure if the girl was a virgin that she was just scared and had laceration that's all.
I told him that i am also a medical personnel and I know how these things are, the man appealed to me to give him until Monday, that he will handle it.
Gone are the days were ignorance is an excuse, everyone should take responsibility of his or her actions, all I want is disciplinary measures, it will serve as a form of closure to my sister, please I need advice on how to go about it
Gone are the days were ignorance is an excuse, everyone should take responsibility of his or her actions, all I want is disciplinary measures, it will serve as a form of closure to my sister, please I need advice on how to go about it
*I am so sorry about what happened to your sister but forget it and move and help your sister heal.. Disciplinary measures? that wont happen. They may tell you that she will be punished but do nothing about cos its probably cheap labour they are paying for.... Your sister did not document the bleeding, did she? If she did then please go ahead and sue the company that took her virginity..
Lastly please calm your sis down and let her know that marrying with Virginity these days does not make a marriage last oh...
She will be fine!
Hmmm... It is well. In as much as they deserve all the disciplinary action, When you try to prolong the issue, the pain will also be prolonged as well on the part of your sister.
ReplyDeleteLet your sister take a deep breath and try to relax. The mistake has been done and cannot be undone. She should try to look past it and move on... Besides the place will still be very tight and the future husband will understand.
It is well.
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DeletePlease console her that she didn't have sex, some lose their virginity riding horses. Stella she has a right to be upset about something she kept all this while
Delete@Yvonne The story na 😊😊 Leave me oh. This thing is not funny joor.
DeleteMay we not jam or see quack nurses, lab scientists and docs, amen.
DeleteKindly ask your sister how she will like to attend to the matter and if she wants to proceed by all means do so
DeleteNigerians have to start being accountable for mistakes they make, my friends suffers from kidney issues because of a silly issue like this, she dint sue but we just can’t keep making mistakes.
Proceeding with an action doesn’t make you a wicked person, it’s just they law and if she had listened to your sisters request we won’t be here.
In the season of this fasting season you can show mercy but it all depends on your sister
I am sure she did it on purpose.
Push up (original)
I'm certain that the so called nurse was intentional with her act.
ReplyDeleteAs much as I advocate for women,they can sometimes get jealous unprovoked.
I have done that test and yes,you don't need to go that deep to get a sample.
Poster,help your sister heal,but also try your best to make the 'nurse Eliza' pay for her wickedness.
Infact the hospital generally must pay for negligence.
Laboratory attendant not nurse
DeleteYou people are always quick to vilify nurses it not cool
Make your comment and leave nurses alone. No one stopped you from being a nurse. You guys always find a way to insult and ridicule nurses. When did a lab attendant become a nurse?
DeleteWhether Lab attendant o or nurse o.
DeleteI said what I said,since you two can't respectfully correct me without accusations.
Why would anybody hate on nurses?
It must have been a very traumatic experience. Sorry to your sister.
DeleteNa why she supposed see doctor first, the self requested lab is part of self medication but we are not ready for this conversation.
Even children itch , be it a girl or boy child, that the lab scientist did not believe that the girl is still a virgin , this alone shows how much knowledge she has in her field.
ReplyDeletePlease help your sister heal like Stella said , try and be that big sister , reassure her that she can still keep herself for her husband to be . Allow the case to rest , you can tell your sister that the girl has been arrested or something to calm her and take away her fears.
She ll be fine. She should also not tell her friends of what happened to her so they don’t make matters worse for her.
Mummy Anthony-Clever
poster you want to fight with the mouth, no proof from your sister like recording what happened, how it happened, and the bleeding she sustained after the whole process. Your mum and sister would have reported the case to the police on that same day before anything. Now, what do you want to say to the police when maybe she is not bleeding anymore.
ReplyDeleteI will say you both should move on from this, find a way to help your sister forget it please. She is still a virgin cos she has not slept with any man. Your sister would have gone to a government hospital for the swap test. Your sister would have gone with your mum for this swap and just maybe the nurses or attendant would have been more careful. I pray your sister heals fast.
So sorry for the experience. Let her go to God to help her and give her peace. It is well
ReplyDeleteIt's well, just let it go and help your sister heal
DeleteSmh.. they should use these ones as scapegoats. For the hymen to break and start bleeding,they must have used force. Maybe in their silly minds,they thought she was an olosho claiming virgin, just as they always insinuate to every Nigerian lady. Use them as examples jare. Yeye unprofessional rats.
ReplyDeleteHer loosing her virginity this way is so sad,but virginity can't keep a man these days. I married the best man on earth who worship me,I wasn't a virgin. So far she's nor promiscuous,her chances is very high. Besides ,its time we start training our children to keep their virginity for their own well being sake and not because of a man
ReplyDeleteThere has been no loss of virginity.
DeleteThe poster's sister is still a virgin.
You slept with a man or men prior to marriage. She has not and does not desire to do so. You and the poster's sister are on different wavelengths...your situations are not the same!
There has been no loss of virginity.
DeleteThe poster's sister is still a virgin.
You slept with a man or men prior to marriage. She has not and does not desire to do so. You and the poster's sister are on different wavelengths...your situations are not the same!
But that is her choice, it doesn’t even have to be a for a man
DeleteShe has a right to keep herself, it’s her body, do you know what she has passed through just to keep herself only for one unprofessional lab attendant to take it away?
Let her mourn it how ever she wants
Push up (original)
Hmmm
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing that you can do sef
I don't even know what to say now
I doubt her hymen broke
ReplyDeleteA rough Pap smear like this will cause the walls to bleed but it’s doubtful the instrument went in far enough to touch the hymen. I’ve had bleeding from a Pap smear but the hymen was fine
Also for FYI, the hymen can be broken jn a virgin without any insertion. It happens to ladies in certain sports
Btw a virgin is one who has never had penetrative sex. Hymen or not, she’s still a virgin
Have you seen a Cusco's speculum before @15.49
DeleteYour sister is still a virgin. There are some girls born without a hymen and lots more lose theirs in different other ways besides sexual intercourse. Your sister is a virgin because she hasn’t had sex. Not because she doesn’t have a hymen.
ReplyDeleteYou people should be calming down. Impact on the hymen doesn't mean she's lost her virginity....she loses her virginity the day she has sex with a man.
ReplyDeleteThe bleeding doesn't mean that the hymen is broken or that she's lost her virginity. Whenever she marries and have intercourse for the fist time, she would still bleed whether the hymen is broken or not.
Is the lab registered? Find out. Find the professional disciplinary body
ReplyDelete/ regulatory board and report. If it is not registered, that is case closed. It may be shut down until properly registered. The loss of income will be some punishment.
The case may be difficult to prove without evidence. Your sister will heal if she is not quickly examined and documented. The defence may be a flat denial. But the record will be kept in case of another time. And the owner will sit up going forward to avoid a repeat.
A virgin is a person who has not had with anybody. It is said some women are born without the major indicator or lose it through vigourous sports activities. Both these three facts should be used to console your sister because she's still who she was before the incident.
As for scapegoating, I support your planned action. You may, however, consider whether it would no further traumatise your sister. But if she supports your intended action, you can go on.
#TheLegalTrainee
The hymen did not break per se, she had injuries from the instrument. The blood was probably from the vaginal wall that is not used to foreign objects. She's still has her hymen intact and the tightness of virgins. In fact, she's still a virgin.
ReplyDeleteShe has nothing to worry about.
They should get a second opinion then and check if the hymen is not broken. If it is due to what happened at the lab, then that’s another document they can get from a different hospital as proof for lawsuit. Poster do the best you can so your sister knows you guys have her back. It will help her heal. Goodluck.
DeleteWhat nonsense! I am verry broken reading this. My heart is heavy.
ReplyDeletePoster, let your sister go to a proper hospital for examination and medical report. You would need it while pursuing the case. Also get a police report. If she has healed, it will be her works against the lab with no evidence.
DeleteSue the lab Abeg. Let them pay for damages. Enough of all this sorry sorry rubbish. They get away with anything and that’s why they don’t do things right
ReplyDeleteIf you have money, sue the fucking company!! This is why they do whatever they like because Nigerians always leave it to God. Are you able to take some time off work, go the PH and really deal with this fucking lunatic witches. I’m so so angry on your sister’s behalf. This will mess her up psychologically. I’m not in naija so I can’t really tell you where to go but go to any women’s center that advocate for women. Next time you talk to the manager, record him so you have evidence. Start gathering evidence and proof before they start to deny it. Nigeria has messed up some of you up that y’all are now so used to been treated like sh*t. This situation can never happen here in the US of A. That family don rich because that’s a serious lawsuit! Poster please advocate for your sister. Speak to a lawyer. There are pro bono lawyers or lawyers who doesn’t charge arms and legs for their service. Even though she can’t get her virginity back, at least she’ll be compensated and it’ll go a long long way. Either money or that lab assistant goes to jail! What rubbish ðŸ˜
ReplyDeleteItchiness around the vulva has no business with speculum. Your sister could have been itching because of excess pubic hair, allergy to the soap she is using, coming in contact with bad water, or wearing non-cotton underwear, it really could have been as simple as that. None of this required a high vaginal investigation. Speculums can be quite painful already even with sexually active women, no doctor would use a speculum on a virgin. Virgins get a different type of examination, but the person was not a doctor and obviously lacking in technical skills and bed side skills.
ReplyDeletePlease open a case with the Ministry of Health or the Ombudsman office if such exists in Nigeria. This should never have happened. You can also consult a lawyer to see what legal recourse is available. Also take your sister to a gynae so they can document any observable trauma to her body, which will help to build your case.
She is every bit a virgin and should not despair. If she remains inconsolable, there is hymen reattachment surgery that can be done if she needs to bleed on her wedding night. It isn't cheap and the lab should be forced to pay for it. However, there are still men of great character on earth who do not need a wife to bleed. It is up to her how far she wishes to go and how major this is in your culture to have a broken hymen before marriage.
Your sister is still a virgin. Yes, the hymen has been broken and she bled a little, but when she has her first sexual experience, it will still feel new and like 'a first'.
ReplyDeleteYou can actually sue the lab if you want to , you will be entitled to a remedy at law, or drag them to the Rivers State Multi-Door Court House ( It is an alternative dispute resolution centre(. It is within the High Court premises in Port Harcourt). You will get redress there and there will be confidentiality and privacy in dealing with this issue. Plus, it is not subject to all the rigors and difficulties of litigation which you may experience in the main litigation justice pathway.
My sister's hymen was broken during medical examination in the UK. But in her case, they gave her the option to decline or consent to the procedure. Ranking health above hymen, she consented and the procedure was done. She really didn't feel too bad about it.
Your sister just needs to be counseled, encouraged and supported, she will be fine.
If she is a little extra, you can get a counseling session with a female pastor or a pastor's wife (could be virtual or physical)
She should not allow this derail her chastity decision, it is a gift to herself and an honor to her God.
Let her plead with God using her virgin blood ( just by saying, Lord I use my blood as a point of contact and assurance)that this shedding of blood is a symbol of Christ's blood that I shall not lose my life to sickness or any health challenge. Use this blood to purify me and cleanse me and restore my health absolutely and fully. In Jesus Name, Amen!!!!
Poster pls take your sister to a good hospital to check if her hymen is truly broken. If it is broken truly, then you can take it up with the lab. Reason is, in some cases, the bleeding may not mean the hymen is broken, it may just be some lacerations on he walls of the V like the owner told you.
ReplyDeleteSorry about what she is going through. What pains me most is the fact that the attendant and even the owner did not believe she was still a virgin. So the world is that bad now that a twenty year old student cannot be found to be a virgin.☹️
Don't leave them o, if not that girl may damage someone's womb one day.
ReplyDeleteYou can report the lab to their regulatory body. I'd believe they'd carry out some punitive measure, but how to prove they broke her hymen will be an issue. Let her calm down, some ladies don't even know how they lost their hymen, even when they haven't had sex. Repeated vigorous exercise, bicycle and horse riding can rupture it.
ReplyDeleteThose asking you to forget disciplinary measures are directly responsible for the foolishness displayed by medical personnels in our communities. Every branch of medicine have their professional bodies, please report what happened and save others the pains. God bless
ReplyDeleteSee them don't leave them sue them ,etc pacified your sister the deed is done ,so help her heal that is all if she marries and the man doesn't want to agree with her by the time intercourse takes place he will see because the place will still be tight,so God sees everything so no problem
ReplyDeleteWhat exactly are u saying?
DeleteAll this wahala on top ordinary itching,she should have just gone to a pharmacy to get something to take care of the itching,if it doesn't stop then ... Rich people palaver,any small thing they run to hospital
ReplyDeleteIt is high time all medical and paramedical practitioner in Nigeria takes responsibility for their actions. I spoke yesterday and someone came for me that I am insulting the profession in Nigeria. On the contrary, healthcare is more often than none taken for granted. Stella if you had a session for Naija hospital experiences, your ear will full or is it the treatment Nigerian nurses give to pregnant women. These things will continue over and over and over again. Apologies to all Nigerian medical practitioners but most of you are aweful human beings. This is my truth. You seldom bother to listen to your patients meanwhile if they were no patients you all will be out of businesses. Or is it lab technicians when they see patients that have fear of needle or a known RVS patient. The topic of confidentiality goes out the window. Nigeria is bad but most of us are seated right next to that evil, eating and dining and having shares.
ReplyDeleteIf a patient dies from nosocomial infections, even the hospital will say it's the will of God. A victim comes into your hospital unconscious, you'll refuse treatment because of paltry 2k. Most nurses can't even perform basic first aid.
Dear poster, your case touches me personally and I'll say sue the facility but first discuss it with your sister. Lawyers are ruthless and will very publicly question your sisters virginity.
The facility should be looking at a settlement deal rather than questioning feigning ignorance. Who knows, maybe your sisters case will be the beginning of a change.
Please take your sister to a gynae, she must have been exposed to bacterial infection if not properly treated.
Lastly, every microbiologist know that a swab stick alone is used for sample collection. In bacterial studies even the smallest sample can yield significant growth. This is not skin scrapping. It is a swab stick. That lab attendant must be a student. Definitely not a professional. Calling her a student is even an insult to students. That person should be disciplined
I think taking the case up is necessary. That way it will be documented somewhere. The police station, et al. This is for future reference purpose, if need be. You can afterward withdraw the case , but let the company also accept their mistake and apologize in pen.
ReplyDeleteThis one the man was already denying, it's a no no for me. He could have trivialize it,: which I didn't like. So if he takes responsibility, he will go back and train his staff well.
Poster please let your sister go to a hospital so they ascertain what exactly they did to her. She is still a virgin thou. Just talk to her that all will be well with her. Report the Lab.
ReplyDeleteSue Sue and Sue their behind
ReplyDeletePoster if you can get some time off from work make it this week ,to go see her in person it will be better believe me phone talk and face to face reassurance is different: I believe you re the big sister try see her in person if work permit.
ReplyDeletePls reassure her that she is a virgin once she has not had penetrative sex with a man , she should believe her truth ,counsel her and pacify her doubts ,it's no mistake of hers and going forward if she wants to do any medical test she should go to govt hosp or known private hosp
It's well with her, if you still want to sue depends on what she said you should .
Tell her she is still a virgin inside out
Serious bleeding, unable to work properly from a HVS test, this story get K-leg
ReplyDeleteLadies ! Ladies I take God beg una .. if your daughter comes to you with itchy vagina, and a cottage cheese appearing vaginal discharge .. the one that clumps like akamu and she’s not sexually active aka she’s a virgin .. the first diagnosis that should come to mind is vaginal candidiasis ( yeast infection) treatment is simple .. canesten cream or a fluconazole pessary should do the trick!! All this high vaginal swabs is to investigate a sexually transmitted infection .. I.e the docs want to find out if any bad bacteria is growing high up in her womb.. only semen or penetrative sex can transfer bacteria waaay up into a woman’s cervix to require a high vaginal swab! Gosh basic integrated science is lacking ! I wish Stella would let me host a session to help answer some of the ridiculous questions and answers I see people posting here. I’m an Assistant Professor of Medicine .. at a Teaching hospital in the US. I have followed Stella’s blog since 2013. I know my answer doesn’t help poster but maybe it may help someone else not get traumatized by a speculum exam for a yeast infection ! Poor girl !
ReplyDelete