Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

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Saturday, January 07, 2023

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

 Hmmm....



STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MARRIED TO A BAD COOK



Dear Stella And BVs, I need Help...
We got married recently but my wife does not know how to cook!

I have been pretending to like her meals but i dont because its either the food is too salty or doesn't have a good taste.
Even to make breakfast is also a problem. the eggs are always burnt and dried out.

I have decided to eat elsewhere before getting home and then foce myself to eat what i can of her meals when she presents it....

This is someone who attended a catering before we got married but yet her cooking is nothing to write home about... I love my wife but i also love good food and I cannot continue like this, i cannot cope anymore and need to tell her that what she has been cooking for me to eat is what should be fed to dogs......

I need tips on how to go about this because i know if i use the wrong words, I will hurt her and may cause damage that i may not be able to rectify...

 

*Hmmm me sef no too sabi cook and my husband always tells me immediately i get it wrong and we laugh about it...e just says try better next time and if next time, its not good, he tells me to try again...LOL..

Maybe you can take her out for Lunch or Dinner to somewhere you like their food and after eating , both if you can relax and gist and you can drop it lightly but first tell her not to get upset and that you are telling her cause you love her, whether she vexs or not , she go get the message!

93 comments:

  1. Tell her straight forward that the food she cooks is not good

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear poster,
      You both should have a very deep conversation and be serious this time and tell her what it means to you.

      That aside, is eating home cooked meals a deal breaker for you? Is your wife perfect in other aspects? Is cooking something you can’t let go of?

      We always look for the perfection in everyone and we keep tugging at it until it becomes something bigger. If she’s good in other aspects please kindly overlook the cooking, some people do not have the flair for it no matter how much they try.

      Talk to her first.


      Push up (original)

      Delete
    2. Going to a catering school doesn't guarantee one to know how to cook. In fact, there's a difference between Catering school and Culinary school.
      Well, just like Stella said, take her out for lunch or dinner. After the meal may be while relaxing and gisting, ask her if she thinks she needs to go to a culinary school to sharpen her cooking skills. If she asks why, tell her that her meals haven't been tasting great lately and you believe she can do better.
      Tell her that you appreciate eating her meal but you want her to learn more on it as there new ways she might not know. Just be diplomatic with your words as she might fight it offensive but let her know you're telling her because you love her. Don't respond if she says anything angrily. She will later ponder on it and start seeking ways to improve.
      Afterwards, always let her know what exactly is wrong in any meal you don't find palatable; like what's missing or what's too much. Just give her your honest feedback in love.

      But then again, I hope that you yourself knows how to cook. Cos I know that men who don't know how to light the cooker do well in negatively criticizing other's meal even when there's nothing wrong with it. Since you know the taste of a good meal, let her join you in the kitchen somedays that you do the magic so she can learn.
      Best of luck.

      Delete
    3. I have been married for 16 years now. My wife also didn’t know how to cook When I married her. I thought her how to cook many things. She now cooks and it’s been good on both ends. Teach her if you know how. The world will not stop.. or get someone to teach her. .. the beat goes on..

      Delete
    4. You would have jokingly told her before now. If you do too much senrenren like taking her to a special place to ‘break the news’ it will seem as if it’s more serious than it is and she will be offended and defensive. The very next time she cooks, joke about the salt she put or whatever else is wrong, then tell her the right way to cook it. Even if she is offended, na small thing, she will get better.

      When my husband tells me that I could have prepared a certain food another way, I respond jokingly too that it’s like he will cook for us the next time so he can teach me… yet, he still never cooks πŸ™„πŸ˜„… till today we still argue about me burning jollof rice but I try every time to make it a little less burnt. I always say Nobody was born with a pot and spoon in their hands, but we can all still learn to cook palatable dishes with practice.

      Delete
    5. If you are good at some dishes, make time out on Saturdays and put her through. With time she will learn without being told that her cooking isn’t palatable. Don’t tell her yet without trying to teach her.

      Delete
    6. Infact, if you take her out and after eating good food tell her that her cooking is wack, you are even making matters worse. Like how how does that even make sense???
      Please this is not a movie.

      Discuss at home and identify areas that you think can be improved. Ie too much salt/not enough salt, always burnt, tasteless ,watery, too much seasoning, odour, too spicy/not spicy etc.
      I want to believe that others are complaining, or are you the only one complaining?

      Delete
    7. I don’t know what’s the point of lying to her instead of telling her. I hate this thing about Nigerians never straightforward . This is your wife for goodness sake and you can’t discuss something as simple as this. You don’t have to be harsh about it but I see no reason why a couple who get naked cannot open up and talk. No wonder there’s so much hypocrisy in the country. A man like you don’t know how to approach such a trivial matter how will you handle bigger. I pity her she has a guy that comes online to share his problem(your cooking) with the world he claims he loves you but can’t tell you face to face but come and speak about you hmmm that’s a b$*^tch move!

      Delete
  2. Tell her straight up abeg
    Stop cutting corners

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can come Saturday morning or evening to teach her if you are in Lagos. She will get all the ingredients ready and 2 visit only she will be outstanding in stew, soups, continental and Chinese dishes, fried & poached eggs, sandwiches, Jollof and tasty fried Rice, coconut rice, chicken fried Rice, porridge - unripe Plantain, yam, Irish and sweet potatoes.

      For the soups: I'm Anambra so Bitterleaf, Oha, Egusi- fried will do, Nsala, Peppersoup, Ofe Ugu, Afang, vegetable soup, efo riro, Ofe akwu, Banga are what I can make very well and steady.

      Extra: Meatpie, small chop, correct vegetable salad, spaghetti, egg sauce with yam, yamarita with it's sauce, Moimoi, Parfait- I make the best not bragging all friends and family that tasted mine have never bought Parfait again.

      Don't worry, your wife won't be embarrassed when she meets me rather she will be shocked and eager to learn as I'm one classic girl. I look like I can't be in kitchen but taste and see. I love cooking that's why I'm still leaving with my sister and her family rather than on my own lol.

      I'm not a caterer o lol. I will throw in Vanilla and Red velvet cake as jare.

      Nothing knowing how to cook isn't a bad thing, its choosing to remain bad in it is. Learning is a lifetime thing.

      Just get your wife to read the chronicles. She will see it's coming from a place of love not otherwise. Madam if you are reading this hubby loves you. Don't feel bad, you will be better soon

      Delete
    2. 'Classic girl' that doesn't know the difference between the words 'classy' and 'classic'

      Delete
    3. Sisi Nene
      Go and find your own man. See advert ooo.
      So you will use food and steal her man.

      Future onye oshiamu.
      Classic girl or classy girl.
      Girls are hustling.

      Wife if you read this.
      Don't.

      KING XOXO MYSTERY

      Delete
    4. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”

      Delete
    5. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
  3. You shouldnt hide your reservations about her cooking from her. Tell her about it and help her learn too. Cooking is all about expressing yourself. It's a skill and expression. You have to take the lead, start helping her when she cooks. Show her how you do it and why you do it. help her to express herself without fear. She will make mistakes but she needs to learn from them. Again, let her know that you can cook a particular food in different ways and also make it taste and look kike how you want it.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You found out after marriage? Send her back to catering school.
    You knew before marriage? Continue looking at what made you marry her (yansh).
    You knew and sent her to catering school? Resend her, browse, help her cook when you have chance. Tedious.
    Manage the food like that, she will improve with time.
    You married a "wife not cook", na them be that.πŸ˜„

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      I bet he was also a team #cooking is not a gender role..
      Him belle go hear 'ram🚢🚢

      Delete
    2. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. So men really pick partners based on physical endowment πŸ₯΄πŸ₯΄πŸ˜³πŸ˜³. Wow 😳

      Delete
    3. Where are the team that it's not necessary for a woman to know how to cook. πŸ’”πŸ’”πŸ’”

      Delete
    4. @15:27,
      You dey ask as if you no know. Abi you dey whine us?

      Delete
    5. Lmao yansh or yellow flashy skin. These two things, once u them, these men care for nothing else until they enter the marriage then they start whining

      Delete
    6. πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ Team wife not cook we are here!

      Delete
    7. 15:27 noooo, Oti o Nigerian men pick according to how nice and spiritual you are.

      Delete
    8. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Delete
  5. There’s nothing stopping you from cooking if you’re the better cook. In some families the man is the better cook and handles the cooking. I don’t see anything wrong with that. You can also outsource this task if you have the financial means.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haba anon, this ur comment, sit bck and read it, does it honestly mk sense to u? This woke generation of asking men to be the ones handling cooking, let’s ask ourselves, is it actually working in our favor or against us?
      If you had said he should do more of helping out or on weekends, he should do the cooking fine, but telling him that if he is a better cook he should handle the family’s cooking, is somehow.
      We keep saying it here that no matter how rich or independent a woman is, there is joy and love in a man still providing for her, let us extend thesame courtesy on the men. No matter how a man can cook, even if he is a chef by profession, there is joy and love in ur woman being able to cook ur meals and serve you.
      OP, please don’t get tired , pay for her cooking classes again, tell her that she needs to improve in her cooking but please don’t tell her that all this while her cooking was bad, just use another word. Good luck!

      Delete
    2. Anon 15:41 there's nothing wrong with the comment. The poster should do the cooking full stop. If he can eat, he should cook.

      Delete
    3. 16:37, then una go wait taya, shebi children will soon join, pls wait for man to come back from office and make lunch, or let him close by evening, and come home and set table and cook dinner, shebi he has started eating out, no problem, let’s see who will cry foul when he totally eats out and never comes home for food.

      Delete
    4. I know a man that does cooking in his house even when visitors are around, infact he doesn't joke with his stomach.
      He cooks different dishes like a chef.
      Infact his friends will even carry chairs to seat near him in the kitchen while he is cooking so they can continue their discussion.
      Even me know to see food this man will eat and approve will be difficult.
      He is rich so is more like a hobby.

      Delete
    5. 15:41 and 16:57, Thank you.

      Since the woman cannot cook. The man should cook. Expectedly, the woman should provide for the home. Or will the man provide and return to cook?

      That was how I wasted my time doing cooking, domestics and childcare last year, and lost one month fee/salary and paid professional default fees. Yet, still had to fund 99% of all family expenses out of savings.

      I have told her. As I waste my time on domestics, she should not ask me anymore whether I have met my employer's set professional target and whether I have been paid at month end. If I meet the target and get paid fine. If not, when savings are finished, we would get to a stage where school fees would not be paid one term. Then we would seat and reappraise the marriage.

      Delete
    6. Some women are very lucky o. I work, take care of kids and still provide at home and still cook, pay almost all the bills including rent. It's exhausting and very tiring, but God dey.

      Delete
    7. Most renowned chefs (irrespective of their nationality) are male. There is nothing wrong in the man cooking if he is better than the wife. I know men who cook. Whoever is better at a task should do it. The key is that the family is happy and united.

      Delete
    8. There are homes where the men are the cooks without issues, though unconventional. Both men and women, you know what you want, why not go for it? The woman can't cook and the husband won't, what do you think marriage is?
      Abi poster you will divorce your wife or cheat on her because of food? Try to manage the situation abeg. You weren't forced to marry her when you knew she couldn't cook. Employ a chef or teach her, or send her back to catering school. Whatever you do, do it respectfully. Please my people don't go and marry someone's daughter or son with the intention of stressing the person, try to find someone that fits your expectations mostly then try to put up with the rest. No one is perfect. Who knows what your wife has to put up with?

      Delete
    9. 17:50dont be bitter
      It’s your family

      Delete
    10. 17:50 Are there not many women who cook, do domestics and childcare and provide for the home?
      Simply because their men are lazy, incompetent and incapable and believe holding a pot will erase their masculinity.
      What's so special about what you ate doing?
      Is it not your home or are you a guest?
      If you cannot do what you can to salvage your marriage, whose effing business?
      Or were you forced to marry?

      Delete
  6. Oga cant you cook see your mouth like kettle! Can't you cook ? Is cooking only for women? Please cook what you can eat and dont turn somebody daughter to mama put! Haba !

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hmm...how do you go about this and not brush her self esteem?

    Well one girl that worked with my sister had similar problem and she said she couldn't learn at all...she had to settle for a cook who she handsomely..omo it's well with you o

    ReplyDelete
  8. Communicate, communicate communicate.Speak to her. Teach her if you know how. Be patient. This is marriage. You help and support each other grow.

    ReplyDelete
  9. When you're both in good mood, tell her you will like her to go back to catering school, and this time, she must put all her mind and effort there that you need to see a good result. Tell her she needs to up her cooking skills, this isn't something you should be afraid to tell her. Only if she's unreasonable type that would make her angry



    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God bless you for this comment.

      Delete
  10. Divorce her. This marriage is dead on arrival. Do you want to continue to eat bad meals for the rest of your life. Tell her you can't cope and be blunt with your feelings. In your next relationship, prioritise what qualities you want in a woman.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn......so straightforward πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ€«πŸ€«πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Delete
    2. Someone entered this new year with violence. Be calming down first.

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    3. Just like that? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Natasha you mean o.

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    4. So he can marry you

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    5. πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ Men if you are a foody go and marry a chef nau........ Ns wa for una.

      Delete
    6. πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚

      Delete
  11. How about you cook the foods since you know what a good cooked food is and crave for it?
    Read about why people cook salty foods or no salt. Study shows it's linked with stress disorder and this happens to all women once in a while. If it's just about salt, you actually have no problem you know; as you can tell her the food is salty and she will adjust. But since it's such a big deal for you, please cook.

    ReplyDelete
  12. My husband cooks better than I do. Once he’s home he does more of the cooking. I have improved much unlike when we married Newly, now sometimes it’s a hit sometimes it’s just there but for my hubby it’s a hit back to back so he has taken over like 90% of the time.
    Poster since you like good food why not make the sacrifice to start cooking it. Your wife can be doing market runs and other chores. Life is not that difficult.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bless you for this comment.

      Delete
    2. Does Poster have the time?

      Delete
    3. If he doesn’t have the time he can employ a professional who can take that up.

      Delete
  13. As long as you love your wife poster, pls help her. You can encourage her to go back to catering school and learn more cooking skills. I believe she will get better as time goes on.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Social media has made things easier for us,especially YOUTUBE in things like this.I wonder why people marry whom they can't freely express themselves to.
    Also,not everyone must know how to cook,outsource it and let your wife breathe.I can only imagine how much effort she's put just to impress you,yet no show.Something tells me,you're hard to impress,like someone I know.
    You both should look for help together,sometimes cook with her,don't leave it for her alone.She loves you,some women wouldn't even give a damn.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are we ready for this conversation? Cooking is just assigned to women cos of gender roles but the truth is not every woman has the knack of making tasty meals. I noticed when I went to university, I cooked very nice meals once I was on my own though, I hardly use to help out in kitchen at home, and there are many guys that cook well.

      I don't encourage laziness or anything but if you cook better as a man, take charge of the kitchen, she can do the market runs and prep to make it easier for you, gender assigned roles are getting more blurred and swapped as time goes by. I avoided the *wifenotcook* debate and drama but I'm being realistic right now.

      Delete
    2. You see that freedom of expression you mentioned? That's the bigger problem I see in this chronicle, not even the cooking issue, because if there was great communication between them, its something he would have mentioned several times and both would have laughed over and found a way around.
      Nnaa, this kain marriage where you people tiptoe around each other and can't just freely communicate with each other is highly bothersome.
      What's the big deal in saying 'babe this food no too sweet o, shey make I cook the next one and you'll watch how I did mine'.
      If its not food today, it will be something else tomorrow.
      Poster you both need to work on your relationship, because you can't con5inue this way.

      Delete
  15. Cooking is an art. Not everyone will know how to cook. If your stomach is your priority, you should have married a great cook. You went for love and you are complaining.

    Best chefs in the world are always men, you go and learn how to cook. Let her compliment you in other areas.

    Whether a food is delicious or not, it satisfies you temporarily and then some will leave your digestive system. Also employ a male chef.

    KING XOXO MYSTERY

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    Replies
    1. Why not a female chef?

      Delete
    2. E get why πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Delete
  16. No better way to say it to her than you opening up to her and telling her the meal she prepare are not okay for you. You should try cooking with her to see if she can learn or get her a personal teacher on cooking.

    Let the teacher come home to teach her, you are not helping her by telling her lies that you enjoy her cooking instead of telling her the truth. Please speak up help her sit up.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Find the right time to express it.

    I don't know the kind of catering school she went to but many atimes all these schools have many students. What she will need is one-on-one teaching. There are some dishes that I cook till date, that I learnt from my ex-sister.

    Get a trusted matured woman from the South to teach her cooking, I'm sure she will appreciate it.

    Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Love your submission about one on one coaching.

      Poster, as you love your wife, you will need to find time when you people are in a great mood to tell her about it. If you know how to cook, teach her too. Then, whenever the food is not ok, lovingly state it and tell her it would improve.

      Growing up, I didn't like cooking. Thank God I was 'forced' to learn because my mum would travel sometimes and I may happen to be the eldest around among my siblings. My dad taught me more how to cook because he always tells me WHY things are done the way they are done and
      WHEN to add ingredients and at WHAT time to add ingredients too. It was more intaractive. My mum style was just watch and learn. So, necessity forced me to learn how to cook.

      So you could try interactive teachings with her or from someone else.

      Delete
    2. Thanks Supremeflow, this chronicle brings memories.

      I once dated a guy that prioritized tasty rich food over anything, the house can be dirty, he didn't mind. Every time he complained of my food not being "tasty" enough, I thought he was over bearing till I tasted his younger sister's (who happened to stay with him) food, I knew then I had to step up. I learnt how she cooked her meal that made they so finger licking. You know that kind of food sells out while other food vendors don't sell.

      Cooking is a competition in his house, His mum is one of the best cooks in the world no jokes. All his sisters cook well as well, if poster sends his wife there, one month is too much, she will learn how to make tasty food.

      Delete
    3. P.S He and his brothers cook as well

      Delete
    4. Bee Hill, that kind of man should just find a woman who can equally cook very well if food is that much of a priority to him.
      It would be unfair he marries someone who barely enters the kitchen and expects to mold her into his ideal cook.

      Delete
  18. Uncle poster can you cook? If yes teach her if not both of you should watch YouTube and learn together it makes it fun and less humiliating. Love and light.

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  19. Marriage is tolerance.so if that’s part of the things you have to tolerate,pls do so and start cooking urself or get a chef to come cook different meals for you guys and stock them in the freezer so that ur wife’s inability to cook doesn’t rub off on the things she’s good at.

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  20. What happened to your hands? Can't you cook for your family? My husband cooks almost everyday for the family. She is a wife not cook. If you don't want to cook, then eat what she serves you with gratitude.

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  21. I come from a culinary family where the matriarch was a legendary cook. All her children learned, both girls and boys. No man in the family sits and waits for his wife to get home to cook. As a matter of fact some cook more often than their spouse. Cooking is a life skill everyone should learn.

    Now, why don't you cook together with your wife one day and sees how she does things. If you do not see how she goes about cooking how will you know where the problem lies? If you yourself is no good in the kitchen then how will you address this. If you do not know what element is needed in the dishes you love to make them taste good how can you guide her. Just telling someone something is wrong without guidance on how to improve is useless. So before you go to disturb her make sure you know how to correct it first.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He doesn't know how to cook.
      Even if he does, that skill was erased from his brain as soon as he married.
      Let him continue eating food at Mama Nkechi's.

      Delete
  22. You guys can learn together. Check out cooking video on YouTube. Go buy the ingredients together if possible. Get undressed , wear sexy underwear and apron. Cook together. It’s fun and it destresses.

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  23. Enter the kitchen and show her how you like your food prepared.
    We are from different backgrounds! especially if you married outside your state, you have to teach her in the kitchen yourself. If you don’t know how to cook yourself, then there is a problem. As a woman πŸ‘©, I can cook very well but I hate cooking and heavy domestic kitchen cooking πŸ₯˜! All my brothers can cook and me, I will never marry a man that can’t enter kitchen to fix his food πŸ₯˜ himself, because cooking Dey enter my body. I can eat out a whole week! And cook light weekends! I left Nigeria early and the life style abroad for me then was oyibo life style and now that I am in Nigeria briefly, to rest my head and recoup my energy I just relax and focus on my projects. I don’t allow guys into my space, because I don’t want unnecessary stress of Nigerian men, wey like free food and eat a lot. Since you like food then enter kitchen and cook! She is your wife, not your slave! Maybe is tiredness sef that is making her cook nonsense for you to eat, because some of you Nigerian men, una Dey look for Jackie to marry!!! No pun intended!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Oh dear! what she needs is a one on one teaching.If you’re a good cook why not guide her and be her teacher. Shebi una dey teach us bedmatics πŸ˜‚.As long as she’s willing to learn,this shouldn’t be a big deal in your marriage.

    I cook well but my man cooks more because of his flexible work schedule, you can do the same sir.



    Awele

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are some people no matter what they can't be good cooks. Passable maybe but beyond that nothing.

      Delete
  25. Don’t sit and talk and don’t find ways to say it
    Just show her how to. You’re home when breakfast is being made so just go down and do it with it. Use the chance to see where she’s getting it wrong and do it together. For dinner, ask her to allow for you both to make dinner together
    Remember BeyoncΓ© can’t cook and they’re still married. You’re fine

    ReplyDelete
  26. You need to tell her. If you do not tell her, she cannot get better. Will you decide to eat out for the rest of your marriage life? What about your kids? Will you subject them to eat such foods? If you are a better cook, you can prepare something one day and while you eat it together, you tell her "this is how I like eg my rice, less salt, fried tomatoes, etc"

    You say it loving tht she wouldn't feel bad about it. Personally my husband is a better cook, the day I do my rubbish in the kitchen, he'll compliment the food first and now tell me what else is wrong with the food. I don't feel bad about it at all

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  27. My parent's marriage could be described as when two good cooks married each other. My father cooked during the weekend even when my mom was a housewife and had a maid while my mom cooked during weekdays. My dad would even run market errands. If he was alive now, he'd be turning 83. My mom would travel for weeks and my dad would cook everyday. Infact, we used to beg my mom to travel more cos my dad would literally cook anything we want to eat.
    My point here is that, if your cooking skills are good and you love your wife enough, you should find time to teach her how to cook even if it is just during the weekends. You can both cook together and that would even be a bonding experience for both of you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Growing up my dad had days he cooked for us, and we enjoyed his meals as much as we enjoyed our mother's. Mom could be busy, not around, tired or ill and my dad would take over. He was always the one to prepare starch for us whenever we ate it. He had his special beans recipe and other foods. I always remember this about him fondly. I miss him.

      Delete
  28. Honestly, cooking is not easy... sometimes u get it perfectly right, oda times it is average...I remember when I newly married..my husband always complain dat I should improve in my meals not only cooking yoruba stew...I should always make varieties


    I decided to make YouTube my friend, watched various videos..infact my jollof rice and fried rice tastes like party rice...all thanks to YouTube...He helps sometimes when he sees u am tired...but just be ready to do a thorough cleaning when he is done bcos he sabi mess up kitchen for me..

    Poster, pls if u are better than her in dat aspect, u can help her out sometimes..and always watch YouTube videos together to make her improve

    ReplyDelete
  29. Challenges of marriage......is slow and steady that can win this,both of you should eat together while eating the areas you want amendment voice it out immediately.tell her the salt is too much immediately,let her know if the food is not properly mixed immediately that way she will amend better

    ReplyDelete
  30. Poster cooking is an art. Going to catering school without learning the basics of cooking is a waste of time and energy. There are processes involved in preparing different kinds of dishes. I suggest you talk to her and also get someone that would teach traditional (grand mother way of cooking while using modern equipment and recipes)cooking basics.
    I'm a chef (certified) but I have already learnt how to cook from home before going to culinary school.

    So if you're in Abuja, I would love to help free of charge two days in a week (my off days)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster you are lucky ooo. This is about the second or third person offering to help personally.

      Delete
  31. Please let her go to YouTube and learn. In 2023, there’s really no excuse anymore. There are many YouTube channels that teach nice Nigerian dishes, and if she’s open minded, she will learn. I knew how to cook very well before getting married, but after a few years I got tired of rotating the same dishes, so I went to YouTube and upgraded my skill sets. Now I can prepare a proper party jollof rice ,fried rice, afang soup, efo riro, ofe Oha, ofe/ ede, black soup, white soup✌️Etc… There’s no limit to learning if you’re interested in it. Good luck to you and your wife. May God bless you both.

    ReplyDelete
  32. wouldn’t advise a straight forward ‘food is bad’ conversation, some ppl are very sensitive and he may not be good with his choice of words. It won’t end well. Best is to one day be in the kitchen when she’s actually cooking and watch what she’s doing. As she’s adding too much salt quickly stop her and just say ‘dear that’s probably enough, I don’t like it too salty’ trust me she’ll remember and receive your guidance from a positive position than one of criticism.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Tell her the truth,.if it hurts her, she will learn... Buy that food you always eat out, let her join you. Compliment the food, when you have done that several times she will up her game...OGA u fae fear your wife ?

    ReplyDelete
  34. Lagos Mainland Girl7 January 2023 at 18:33

    You both need to sit down and have an honest conversation about this.

    If you know how to cook,you can try cooking together

    Have you guys considered if she can go to your mum or her mum to learn?

    How about YouTube? Check out the following YouTube channels
    Zeelicious Foods
    Flo Chinyere
    SisiYemmieTV
    Ify's Kitchen

    They break the process down so even someone in secondary school can understand.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Poster asked for tips on how to tell his wife to up her game.

    Bro, you know the emotional type of your wife better. If she is easy going, tell her plain. She will ride on it and continue to improve. But if she is fragile, there is no way to tell her.

    On the excess salt, tell her jokingly you have just found (please show your surprise) that too much salt is not good for the kidneys (this is true) and that it is better to under salt or under season food because it is easier to add salt at the table.

    If you do not have the time to cook, please do not go waste your work or professional improvement time at it. Get and pay somebody to teach and guide her do it over as many weekends as necessary; or if you can afford it, employ somebody. Your matrimonial expenses would soon increase. Trust me on this. Most of the Nigerian women who shout "Men/Husbands should cook"; "Can't you cook, why are you complaining"; "Nigerian men like big food and jacky wives"; etc. are NOT SO VOCAL in shouting that "Wives should share matrimonial bills 50/50" or that "Wives should bear the major part of family bills". Trust me on this too.

    If you like spend all your time in the kitchen. When it is time to drop the home dough, you must. All time spent in the kitchen is forgotten. If you can do both, enter the kitchen and cook for your family. If not, wisdom is profitable to direct.

    Mr. Mann

    ReplyDelete
  36. Poster are you a good cook? If yes, you can make out time to teach her. Both of you can cook together so she will learn & know what she is not getting right. If not, you can engage the services of a good cook to teach her how to cook. If she is serious, she will learn. I've seen someone that did it & it worked out for them. Why not give it a try.

    Please let the cook come to your house to do that . Also discuss it with her in a polite way so that she will not misunderstand you. But you have to tell her the truth. You've never enjoyed any of her meal & as a result, you eat out before you get home.
    I pray it works.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Poster are you a good cook? If yes, you can make out time to teach her. Both of you can cook together so she will learn & know what she is not getting right. If not, you can engage the services of a good cook to teach her how to cook. If she is serious, she will learn. I've seen someone that did it & it worked out for them. Why not give it a try.

    Please let the cook come to your house to do that . Also discuss it with her in a polite way so that she will not misunderstand you. But you have to tell her the truth. You've never enjoyed any of her meal & as a result, you eat out before you get home.
    I pray it works.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Poster
    Another suggestion is,
    Buy plenty bag of salt and keep in your house, maybe in her former life, she was Lot's wife. Then buy small foodstuff.

    Anytime food is ready,make up your mind that you are eating salt garnished with little food. Inform your doctors too on time.


    Size Nene, advertising boldly.


    KING XOXO MYSTERY

    ReplyDelete
  39. When I got married newly, I wasn't a good cook and you could tell from my husband's facial expression that he wasn't enjoying the food. I started spending time watching YouTube videos on how to cook especially flo chinyere"s page. Now I'm so good, my in-laws think I should open a restaurant. Give her time, she would come around

    ReplyDelete
  40. When I was dating my ex back then in Uni, I no Sabi cook apart from boiling water, beans and white rice. I remembered a day I went to his place, and his roommate ask me to cook jellof rice, omo I go meet am and tell him say I no fit cook jellof rice. He made the rice and never stop teaching me how to cook. Well, I later start reading books on how to cook and that's how I learn to cook. I would have loved to marry my ex but I can't deal with someone sleeping with someone's wife ( sugar baby to be precise). If you can cook teach her.

    ReplyDelete

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