Hmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
LOST LOVE
Good Afternoon Stella,
Bvs please is there a way to get my boyfriend back, I think I lost him to someone not too close but I think I know.
Looking back, I agree before everyone will start bashing me that I was at fault. Perhaps I was too self-centred as most friends sometimes refer me as.
'
So me BF is a good guy and all that, but ran into financial difficulties when he lost his job two years ago, and hasn’t been as nice as he used to be. And I understand. But I couldn't bring myself to help him out some of the time, you know we always tell ladies to stop giving guys money if they are not your husband.
Just last month, I got to know he got a job November last year in one of our now irregular chat, he stopped taking my calls, only reply my messages. As and administrative assistant - not my guy. That job was beneath him. He has stopped calling, not that he does anyway. Nor does he take my calls, we only chat scantily. And he had asked to stop checking him up at his place, nor does he accept my invites like he used.
Until by coincidence, sometime this month our company had a business transaction to close with another company and I was included in the team. Guess who we went to meet? My BF. They made him surpervisor. I was glad and excited for him. We concluded business, and I took him to lunch.
Good Afternoon Stella,
Bvs please is there a way to get my boyfriend back, I think I lost him to someone not too close but I think I know.
Looking back, I agree before everyone will start bashing me that I was at fault. Perhaps I was too self-centred as most friends sometimes refer me as.
'
So me BF is a good guy and all that, but ran into financial difficulties when he lost his job two years ago, and hasn’t been as nice as he used to be. And I understand. But I couldn't bring myself to help him out some of the time, you know we always tell ladies to stop giving guys money if they are not your husband.
Yes, that's the principle I followed. He didn't complain nor does he seem interested. But he was my resource person; from work, to work place issues, to advice and admonitions, to motivation. He was my go-to person, because he has a wealth of experience that comes in handy to help navigate my stormy waters. Like I said, he was a very nice person both in attitude and character.
We always discuss a whole lot, from workplace gossips to job openings in our branch of my company. And he would always ask me for the 411, and ask that I help him get that opening. But I always refused, because I felt the openings are beneath him. When this continued he got mad at me (non verbally nor emotional abusive), just felt bad that I don’t look out for him. This continued until he disappeared off my radar.
We always discuss a whole lot, from workplace gossips to job openings in our branch of my company. And he would always ask me for the 411, and ask that I help him get that opening. But I always refused, because I felt the openings are beneath him. When this continued he got mad at me (non verbally nor emotional abusive), just felt bad that I don’t look out for him. This continued until he disappeared off my radar.
The last time we spoke he told me that he is seeing a wicked side of me, he doesn't know existed. That he is down and I am still making choice to what job he should go for and not take to survive in the short run. That I have too much ego, and many other things he pointed out. I suggested we take a break, until he comes around to his usual self. I don’t visit him at his place, but I have done that every saturday four months now and still counting, but never meet him at home.
The place is always locked and our talk became very infrequent until it died recently.
Just last month, I got to know he got a job November last year in one of our now irregular chat, he stopped taking my calls, only reply my messages. As and administrative assistant - not my guy. That job was beneath him. He has stopped calling, not that he does anyway. Nor does he take my calls, we only chat scantily. And he had asked to stop checking him up at his place, nor does he accept my invites like he used.
Until by coincidence, sometime this month our company had a business transaction to close with another company and I was included in the team. Guess who we went to meet? My BF. They made him surpervisor. I was glad and excited for him. We concluded business, and I took him to lunch.
We talked, laughed and joked. Since then, he had gone totally cold on me. Then recently I sent him a long message, explaining myself and asking him to forgive me if he felt I wronged him in ways he doesn’t understand.
He sent his own long reply, detailing my failings and how I never got his back. Thoughtfully, I slept over his message and realised I did him wrong. Truth be told, I could have gotten him any of those jobs. But I didn’t, maybe I was bothered he could grow to become my boss, he has got the potential. I haved missed him so much, and all the values he adds to me. I didn’t think it mattered then but now I can see that if I were to pay for the things he voluntarily did for me, I would still be indebted to him.
How can I win him back, I could see all the handwriting that he has slowly moved on. We had planned our introduction for November and traditional for December last year, only shifted it to this year because he wasn't able to get a job. As he said he can't go into marriage without a job. What do I do now. I can't involve family, because we were suppose to announce it to them last year as a surprise.
How can I win him back, I could see all the handwriting that he has slowly moved on. We had planned our introduction for November and traditional for December last year, only shifted it to this year because he wasn't able to get a job. As he said he can't go into marriage without a job. What do I do now. I can't involve family, because we were suppose to announce it to them last year as a surprise.
My elder sister that knows about us that I would have asked to help, fell out with him. When he accidentally heard her talk innocently about his joblessness. Since then, he had paused their interractions.
Please any good suggestion?
I will read through the comment section anytime this is posted.
Thank you.
I will read through the comment section anytime this is posted.
Thank you.
*Hmmm, the truth is that the relationship will never be the same again and i dont think he would want to marry you for not being there for him as a girlfriend....
I dont know how to suggest anything since you said he is no longer responding well and already dating again.. If the person he is dating now is the one that helped him get the Job, i dont think you standing a chance getting him back....
To save you from the stress, why dont you invite him to Lunch or dinner and talk things out, find out how it stands and if you both can come back together.. dont use gbenshing to try and settle oh
Why do women find it so hard in helping out a man in distress but they wish to get help when in distress I can never understand this .
ReplyDeleteLol..
DeleteYou know why I dey laff, the same people that gave her the advice here on how to be useless and wicked would still be the ones to come and blame her on the result 😂😂
I made a similar illustration on that "mtcheww post"..
Werey is back for the money😁.. Awon gold diggers.. they would give you a million reasons why they can never 'built' with a man or support his progress,. Then when God has blessed bono,. Them go come dey carry their shameless entitled selves come and want you to respect them..
Nonsense chronicle
This statement is not true.
DeleteMAJORITY OF WOMEN PREFER TO HELP MEN THAN THEIiR WOMEN.
Even in the family, Mom go favor son than daughters..Big sis go favor little bro than lil sis.
I put it to you that your statement na lai!
In this case, I don't blame the guy at all. In his shoes I would never!
DeletePoster you seem repentant, but your guy feels he has seen your true colours, so don't expect things to remain the same even if you get back together. Try to move on. The advice you receive here you pick and choose and use wisdom, depending on who you are dealing with. In your case, from your writeup, your guy was good all through, even before losing his job and you withdrew your support. Please move on and do better next time. Maybe it wasn't meant to be.
Na the women wey you know. Yes.
DeleteAnd poster…
DeleteNo one on this blog advised you not to help a man who had helped you out in the past, a man with prospects, a man who wasn’t lazy, a man who was willing to do a job beneath him just to survive, a man responsible for your growth… i put it to you that NO one on this blog will advice you not to help out a man like that. The advice they give is not to help a lazy gigilo who felt too big for any job, the one that always has a sick relative… that’s the one you should not give your money.
Push up (original)
The one wey I help Wetin Im use all my money do? Drugs . Meanwhile he lied that he was using it for businesses took my to several uncompleted projects he told me he was handling.
DeleteHmm... when I initially started reading this post, I thought perhaps it was my wife codedly writing but then the direction of the story changed.
DeleteSee, I don't know what to say to you o, because I can totally feel what your guy feels because I have been there. Based on my experience, it seems the loyalty, respect and support men get from women is strictly based on our current financial status. Many men (at least the kind of man I am - and I suppose your guy may be similar) don't ask the same of women. Even if you don't have, if we are committed to you, we give everything we are and have. I didn't loose my job o! We agreed to "japa", me doing my postgraduate study while she worked to support us - she couldn't lead the application because she didn't have a first degree and you can't "japa" on first degree and bring dependant. The things my eyes saw during that period, will make for 5 complete chronicles here and will make people "fear woman". I'm getting back on my feet now and she is trying to warm up to me again, but the bubble is bursted - now I understand the old saying that "owo ni obirin mo" - "it is only money that women care about". I've forgiven her, we are still married and trying to move on, but I don't know how to see her in the way I saw her before. Frankly, if we weren't married, there is no way under the sun I'd marry her because it means I am in union with someone whose back I have but if something goes wrong, will not have my back. That is a very dangerous place to be!!!
Poster, you are a very selfish, heartless and envious person. Imagine refusing to help your man get a job because he might become your boss!!! If you can do this to a man you "love", what are you doing to others out there!?!? I hope he never makes the mistake of taking you back; you have NO SOUL.
DeleteIt is irritating and very annoying that some of you men rope all women into the same shameless category. I for one have seen many gold digging men. I have seen men in a relationship solely to use the women involved. So stop acting like all women are bad because you chose wrongly. Most of you that do that are after flashy, not caring about values or into outward appearance only, or what you thought you would gain. When the sh*t hits the fan ya'll begin crying. It baffles me a lot with some of my guy friends. They do not like the lady dying for them, doing all to please them, na the one wey dey show dem pepper naim dem dey treat fine and appreciate. They will do all to wife them. Some of them get dumped. What a world! The irony!
Deletemy dear you reason this. women are wicked. i am a woman too. imagine fearing that your own guy ll be greater than you and we think men have weak egos. As a women I WILL NEVER MARRY YOU. Nne stella is being nice with her red pen.YOU ARE WICKED!!!
DeleteHmmm the Poster is s very selfish and wicked lady.He is better off without her. Thank God the guy has finally picked up, imagine even her sister mocking his joblessness.
DeleteNot all women biko at 15:01.
DeletePoster, all odds are against you from your write up, but like Stella suggested, invite him for a lunch or dinner, talk things through, if at the end of the day he's no longer interested in you, please kindly move on.
Invite him for a dinner, talk in fact eh, pour everything out and hear from him. If he still loves you, fine. If it won't work, give him space and move on.
DeleteThe thing is, have you truly changed? Can you actually stand by him as a child of God?
Move TF on.
ReplyDeleteEggzactly
DeleteLike…
DeletePoster, please stop referring to him as “my boyfriend” he is your ex and it seems it will remain so
A man that takes time to make sure he gets over you doesn’t plan on coming back soon, I love how vocal he is concerning what he noticed about you, that way you can work on it for your next relationship.
You actually do have envy, cus how could you be jealous he was going to be your boss, like, won’t he be your husband? You and your sister dragged him for being jobless yet you dint want him to even earn 50k so he could be add value to himself? Wow
You let a man with prospects and value go, just let it be, if you beg him one last time and he doesn’t agree just let him go.
Push up (original)
Pls find someone else
ReplyDeleteHe didn’t respect your decision and always seems to fault you
You didn’t want him taking a low status job at your place and I don’t see what’s so wrong or shocking about that
Never let anyone tell you they don’t want you more than once
Move on
Ehhhhh, see analysis!
DeleteHow ye humans think is beyond me!
And she's the one to decide whether the job is below his status abi? Eventually, she and her sister used his joblessness yab him. Abeg make una dey analyse the write up well o.
DeleteKindly move on with your life. Don't flog this issue more than this, it will not give the desired result. Your actions wronged him and he already see you as someone who doesn't have his best interest at heart. I think he has moved on, kindly do the same.
ReplyDeleteNo use gbenshing o
ReplyDeleteThe way many women no fit resist cash no matter the risk na same way most men cannot resist gbensh no matter the risk.
Package yourself like you changed, ate humble pie & haven learnt your lesson, and that you have even bigger deals to connect him too.
That could win him back. Goodluck.
Luv and challenges tho.
Lol
Gbenshing be a waste of time as Stella said. He will gbensh and still dump. Once a man has made up his mind, he has made up his mind.
Delete15:40, Gbam. Selfish ass poster, move the hell on. All you do is take take take from him anyway. What value did you add to his life??? I’m glad he dumped your ass.
DeleteThe truth be said, if i was him, you stand no chance! Leave him alone, and work on your short coming. I dont think you loved him enough, that is why you acted the way you did. Best of luck, next time, It is good to be good
ReplyDeleteOh girl, let him go. You are no longer in a relationship. He has moved on.
DeleteIf you had found someone else during your break in relationship, you would have started dating.
You want him back because you are still single..
Go and find your level madam top grade. Cry and move on.
You are mean. Someone lost his job and you could have helped him secure one, but you didn’t cos you felt it was “beneath” him....you actually felt threatened he could grow on the job and you didn’t want that.....enemy of progress.
ReplyDeleteSuddenly, you want him back cos he is doing well. Just keep moving, you are not a good person and I pray he distances himself from you.
As desperate as you are now, you’ll do anything just to get him. I pray all your moves fail cos you can never be loyal.
Sluttychic.
I’m not securing my boyfriend a job at my organization and definitely not a so called low status job
DeleteHer place is not the only place to find work
Say I pray all your moves fail😂😂
Delete15:21 but na she wan marry and settle down. Even if it’s just to get on his feet especially he knows the type of guy and how hard working he is. Anyway, God allowed this to happen so guy man can find better woman.
DeleteYou just move on with you life o
ReplyDeleteThings are never going to be same again if you go back to him tbt
Your*
DeleteGo find another man.
ReplyDeleteYou may even find better than him.
Then don't be very selfish.
You wanted to marry the man. And still want to marry?
And you didn't want to assist him get a survival job because you didn't want him to progress a over you in accordance with his capacity and competence?
All glory to Jehovah that Jehovah is not a man.
Go find another man.
Men like him are hard to come by. Emotionally mature, he was able to express how he feels to her. She lost a good man honestly. On his part, he’s better off without her because she didn’t add anything to his life abeg. Poster move ON! You can’t have your cake and eat it damn it!
DeleteYou have lost this one move on.
ReplyDeleteEven if you find your way in, it can never be the same.
The trust is broken. He won't be there for you emotionally and he won't care much.
You will be dating yourself.
Apply the lesson learnt in your next relationship
You have lost this one move on.
ReplyDeleteEven if you find your way in, it can never be the same.
The trust is broken. He won't be there for you emotionally and he won't care much.
You will be dating yourself.
Apply the lesson learnt in your next relationship
Huh this is worrisome to be honest. if he was my friend i won't advice him to take you back in all honesty. Even if you felt threatened he could some day be your Boss in same company. You would have helped him apply for other jobs at work, helped him conduct dummy interviews together to help him prepare for a real interview.
ReplyDeleteWe humans keep forgetting that we ain't GOD and He is the only one who rewards. A temporary challenge is not a permanent one. The Guy got potential and wasn't a burden kai...
The truth will set you free. If you weren't seeing anyone during his moment of ordeal, then reach out to him and be sincere, hear him out and apologies profusely for your selfishness, if his open to starting from beginning then map out ways to build together as a Team but just know you might walk on egg shells around him for some time (it could be a long time) and his perception about you could be misconstrued easily.
Better think it twice then Ask God to favour you and show you and help you be more empathic towards others. All the best
All I read was how she takes and takes from him, nothing from her end. Guy man didn’t lose out on anything. If na pussy, pussy dey other places. 🙄
DeleteBabes don't regret how evil and heartless they treat a man, they only regret when this same guy gets better or the person they left you for na scam..
ReplyDeleteIf the ex no become big boy, she'll never come up with this nonsense chronicle pretending like she regrets her actions
You, ehn. 🤣
DeleteBut na true you talk.
Stella may I suggest you censor this boy's comments on some post,so crass,low and always generalizing. Probably a broken unfulfilled childhood or a male who has the worst breed of females in his life but my goodness,does he reek of malnourished masculinity or underdeveloped testicles,he has been long enough on this blog to know better.
DeleteYou can't make general statement based on a handful of women. Gosh
My goodness,then he sounds like he is the best thing that has happened lol such unfortunate daark narcissistic place to be.
Dante make your comments and attach that it's based on the females in your life and all your hurt. Azigbakwa tufiakwa gi O What a creature
Go and read Ike's post of this morning and see all the generalisations there.. men this, men that.. still you didn't see us coming to cry..
DeleteBut just one truth about what most of you do, you'll start crying and shouting like I seize your pant..
You think all those nonsense move me, or would make me start looking away when I see something wrong..
You're not serious
Lol, well, na valid angle you talk from sha cos if to say the guy never dey okay now, she no go remember to try go back to am
DeleteLol.. @ 16:04 your likes hate being told the bitter truth. In life, you need people like Dante to wake you up from your dream of lies.
DeleteWhere is the lie?
Delete16:04
DeleteCensor? Relax. Most of the recent chronicles of "I want to go back" or "He went away after my good support" were by women on men who made good. Can a leopard change its spots asks the Bible. Would a woman go back to much poorer boyfriend after a period of separation?
Every adult knows that when women or men is used in respect of a bad behaviour, it does not mean all women or all men though it is nicer to write some women or some men.
If you close your eyes to his bluntness, Dante's opinion here are generally balanced in posts about men and women. You must understand that most chronicles here are from women (at least recently). Therefore, you are likely to read his comments about women conduct more. Moreover, till date, no female Bv has been able to controvert him that he
warned about our beloved MM. Abi MM na woman ni?
Stella knows her work. Without patronizing her, 3 decades on a job is no easy street.
There are fewer active male contributors here. If you drive all away, how would you know or learn about the throughways of the male mind. You will continue telling yourselves the same old wives tales that led to this chronicle. She was told not to help a man. She listened and applied it out of context maybe because no man spoke up to tell when to help and when not to help a man. Who sent in the chronicle? The man or she?
Honestly Dante your generalizations are irritating at best, because you label the whole gender as bad in an irritating and cheap way. You jump on any post that puts women down feeling good with yourself. And most times I skip your comments because it is a real downer to good women who are living well and doing right. And tells me the kind of women and men you mingle with. You have no good experience too bad. So if you eventually end up with a good woman, your mindset will cause you to show her shege and turn her to a hard woman. Except you change. Na you sabi sha. Kwantinu.
DeleteI wish this is a lie but alas it's true. Please leave that guy alone. Imagine being worried that a supposed boyfriend will become bigger than you in your office. God forbid bad thing. Leave him. You don't deserve him.
ReplyDeleteHonestly I’m sorry but from ur write-up u seems so selfish like you’ve stated ursef but I don’t think he’s still interested in u except it’s a divine connection which comes very rare…………….! Heed to the best advice I wish you well
DeleteAnyin…..
She wee now comman blame beevees for advise when things don't turn out the way she wants..........
DeleteMy dear please move on.............
ReplyDeletePls leave the young man let him move on with his life while you move on with yours.Your kind of mentality is not good for a relationship not to talk of marriage sef.I’m not saying pack your money and give to man o but if you’re in a relationship with someone,you can’t be too strategic especially if the other person is being vulnerable with you.Pls move on and look for the man that thinks like you,you’ve lost this one.
ReplyDeleteGbam. I pray he won’t take her back and from her write up, that man has moved on. He has truly seen her true colors. Bright colors too.
DeleteClear abeg. God should continue to put people like you to shame by lifting up those whom ye think little of.
ReplyDeleteBro, if you're reading this chronicle, don't take her back.
Gbam. I’m a woman and I feel like slapping the sh*t out of her. A man that adds so much value to her, a potential man that’s hard working. Selfish poster! She only want what will benefit her but can’t give. Guy man knows it’ll get worse in marriage. He jejely cut off from her. Sweet move!
DeleteChaii not another one 😭😭😭😭.
ReplyDeleteIf I were him I will pay you back by accepting and fuck the hell out of you for 2 yrs and at the end stop the relationship by introducing another lady with wedding invitations sent by courier service.You are a wicked woman and you need to be treated so because you came back because he is ok now if he had died in depression you would have come here to thank God for dogging a bullet let your female don help men give you a better advice that is my own .
ReplyDeleteI am surprised at you goke. I thought you were a believer. Though I understand how annoying the chronicle is.
DeleteYou thought he is a believer? If you believe all these 'believers' here, you will believe anything
DeleteGoke is angry in this situation o lol, leave am abeg. This chronicle is annoying I swear.
DeleteIt's actually not easy for a man to stay jobless. It's not easy at all which is the reason why your man wanted to take even the job that was supposedly below him. The least you'd have done then was encourage him, give him hope that a bigger one not beneath him is coming or even allow him get the so called beneath his status job since this was someone you were planning marriage with. You should just move on, the relationship will not work again with your attitude towards him then and the statement your sister made about his joblessness,
ReplyDeleteYou are not a nice person at all. If you could do that to your supposed LOYL, I wonder what you would do to an ordinary friend or acquaintance. What's the big deal in helping him with those jobs, even if he'll later grow to be your boss? What kinda insecurity is that? Babe, pls move on. Even if you two later reconcile, things will never be the same and I bet he will only be there for the sex and nothing else. Maintain that energy you put out. This should teach you a lesson, I hope.
ReplyDeletePoster try and have a talk with him and sort things out and if it doesn't work out, you better move on as some people suggested because I don't see any hope in the relationship with this your boyfriend any more but try to be more reasonable with the next person that will come into your life again. Were ako n'uche n'eme ufodu ihe na ndua
ReplyDeletePls move on ooo.this guy is already dating someone else.
ReplyDelete"maybe I was bothered he could grow to become my boss", and how is that a problem? You're not a nice person at all, people like you will never want others to surpass them.
ReplyDeleteMs tee
Reminds me of Danny in Beef that confessed to tossing his brother's applications so they could be on the same level. Such evil minded souls including this poster don't deserve any good thing in life!!
DeleteWicked girl
Reason why our country it is today. Exactly why. Selfish and wicked lots like poster.
DeleteDear poster,
ReplyDeleteIf you want your ex back just do the "no contact" rule.
Stop texting him. Stop calling him. Stop checking up on him and last but not the least, delete his contact from your phone. If you follow each other on ig..unfollow him and remove him from following you.
Just disappear from his face. Because trust me, you're only pushing him away and making yourself look desperate and unwanted by "scantily" calling and checking up on him.
During this "no contact" period, evaluate yourself, work on being a better version of yourself, go out with friends, do things that make you happy, learn a new skill. It's not going to be easy but trust me, if he really loves you..he'll be bugging your phone after 2 weeks of not hearing from you, seeing your updates on social media.
Also, set your WhatsApp to allow only contact to see your profile picture and about.
Do this and thank me later.
I honestly don't know why ladies don't take this approach. If you choke a man too much, he loses interest.
DeletePoster do this...sometimes it works and please work on yourself it's not good to be self centered
DeleteI normally would agree with you 17:43, but I think in this poster's case poster has already crossed the Rubicon. However there is no harm in trying. Odds are he has forgiven you and wants to move forward with you.
DeleteLol… Rubbish. You think this is a game? A young man was evilly treated by the one person who was supposed to have his back during his bad days.
DeleteYou know what, I support she does this no contact thing too, makes things easier for the guy to focus on the lucky lady in his life now.
Don’t you ladies have no shame? Why hustling to go back to a man you ladies ‘dumped’? Oh, when the men become better , gets more money you can then behave like a dog on heat strategizing ‘rules’ that would take you back to your vomits? Lol… develop some conscience you ladies. If you leave a man then leave him with your full chest!! Shame !!!
DeleteThis works if he’s still interested o. This guy man seems like he’s done. She really showed her true colors and that’s all he needed. He might come back just to maybe check on her as per old flame and might even date. But he won’t marry her.
DeleteShe dumped him. He is financially better or back to where he was. He is in a new relationship. Yet she should tactically win him back.
DeleteThen the new woman will post here how she helped him back but was dumped for the returnee. And the chorus will be "men are ..; una nor dey hear word say dem nor dey epp man"; and the circle continues.
Good to read the majority of women tell her to face front.
When my Bf was trying to win be back and I knew I was completely done, when he finally stopped and took me off his social media, it was more of a relief for me because I was completely done with the relationship. This tactic only works if poster’s not selfish and has selfish and mean tendencies. That guy done. Move on posters.
DeleteDamn!!!, you are stylishly wicked ooo....this guy helped you countless times even when he was okay financially but you didn't even support him at all for flimsy selfish reasons. Well, I feel the relationship can not go back to the way it was because he has seen you 'in action' and he knows that maybe in future, if he has issues again, you might tend this same path again but you can still try to talk to him.
ReplyDeleteP.S : If na me be the guy and I decide to accept you back, I go dey pour holy water for your face every day cause you go wicked gan ooo🤣
From what I read, I think that relationship is deaaaaaaaad. I dont know if this guy can ever forgive you , You wronged him too much, But you should still try, Just like Stella said, take him out for lunch again,Once he tells you he's done with you, Nne accept it and move on OK. Next time try to help someone you love, no matter how small it is.
ReplyDeleteMove on,he has already moved on,don't waste time making a move for reconciliation because it will not work,even if he accepts you back,then love will not be the same again..
ReplyDeleteGood luck to you.
Poster what you did is not good, you did not help out in any way and now he is ok you want him to take you back, biko my fellow gender this type is attitude no dey shame una you left a man with prospect and when he has made it you want him back , pls normalise if you hurt or reject sth/somebody don't go back looking for who will take you back ..
ReplyDeleteI ll helped a guy with job in my workplace in the north I begged our oga to work his transfer to my place of work, the first plane he boarded was paid by me,we lived in the same house planned that at the end of the year we LL get married,guess what he did he started sleeping with another girl in another department,he was saying I'm desperate for marriage, desperate for what I felt we re in together, I count my losses and moved on ,I'm married today to a good soul.
Dante so I ask you pls if one woman is wicked to a man ,does it make the whole women in the world wicked.
Pls tone this women hatred down I wonder how you sleep at night ,once you see this type of boat piam they don touch your button jiri nwayo ,even if your environment is littered with wicked women others are not, don't we see pple who are wicked even to their offspring does it stop pple getting married and having children.
I thought you re a grown man with a good job don't let women matter cease your oxygen one day .
My dear
DeleteDon’t even bother yourself explaining people with perverted thinking, they already see something in a certain light, so no matter the explanation you give or example you set, they will always reason the way they do.
God bless you.
DeleteI'm so angry reading your chronicle. See the way it's giving other cool babes a bad name.
ReplyDeleteHow can you be jealous of the man you intend to spend the rest of your life with? Is his success not yours too? Scratch that, how can you even be jealous of anyone sef that you don't want to help them when you could? What did the Holy Book say again? If he was your brother, will you be happy his babe didn't help him when she could?
So what if he becomes your boss? You just let a good guy slip off when he was willing to do anything legit to stand again. Na wa! You can't fault him cos at this point, he'll ask himself if you're truly the kind of wife that will be there for him if things are not adding up at some point in the marriage. After all, we always tell ladies to look out for red flags, baba sef dey watch him back na. This is what a lot of responsible married women are doing for their darling hubby at home under G if you don't know. Please learn from this.
If he refuses to listen, move on. It is well.
Also, you're meant to read and filter what you read here. It's a learning place but at the same time, shine your eyes.
Poster make one more sincere apology, stress the fact that you truly love him and qould qant him back in your life and start from where you stopped, then stop bothering him.
ReplyDeleteIf this guy is not convince on his own to return to you then it's of no use trying to force it. It can't be like it used to be.
Take a chill pill and try to move on.
Problem is she and the man know it is a BIG LIE to say she love the man. It would be better if she makes a full transactional proposal. Unfortunately, the man is better than her. So she was offering really nothing in the relationship except maybe ... And she was fully selfish in the relationship. Somebody like her would take quadruple for every ... offered/given.
DeleteThe Poster would have done same to the man in marriage if the job loss occurred after. She would not have helped him. When such man recovers and retaliate, she would have still sent a chronicle of how she stayed with him and is being rewarded with ingratitude.
ReplyDeleteSad but true. Even people know her as selfish. Pity.
"But I couldn't bring myself to help him out some of the time, you know we always tell ladies to stop giving guys money if they are not your husband.
ReplyDeleteYes, that's the principle I followed."
I get very irritated when people don't take responsibility. Thank God later you opened up and spoke the truth: "Truth be told, I could have gotten him any of those jobs. But I didn’t, maybe I was bothered he could grow to become my boss, he has got the potential.
As you move into your next relationship, may greed and selfishness not kii you before your time. Because I don't know how not giving a man money means not helping him get a job.
Somebody you planned to marry? What was he supposed to use to pay to wedding etc? Sperm?
Very dem.onic behaviour.
Please leave the young man alone, move on to someone who will show you shege for shege so that you know how it feels.
Mtsheeeeeeeeew.
Are you minding the poster, trying to put the blame on advice given here like anyone has said don’t help men with prospects.
DeleteShe should continue living in denial, I don’t even think she has learnt anything, no accountability whatsoever.
Op. Better change your ways, I don’t think you should date anyone, take time out and learn your personality and work on your flaws.
If self-centered was a person.🤯🥴
ReplyDeleteAs innn she’s the definition of one. Straight up. Guy if you’re on Stella’s blog, no take am back oo. This poster no go build with you. Poverty mentality oshi.
DeleteMy sister move on you have lost him bet you wicked sha change your ways!
ReplyDeleteSacrifice is the ultimate expression of love! Where there is no giving....there is no love.... There is nothing wrong in helping your boyfriend/Fiance finacially,I don't know where ladies of nowadays get this from,,I got burned helping someone in the past,that doesn't mean I won't help my guy especially when he is jobless.....he is a good guy,who just needed a job and encouragement from you,yet he was helping you with office stuff,honestly you don't love him enough.....you can't love without giving....you wronged him,you need to climb down from your high horse and ask for genuine forgiveness from God and him.
ReplyDeleteYou don’t want to win ‘Him’ back, you want to win the image he now has back. He is not at the bottom so now it is ok, he is closing deals so it is ok. Him the spirit is of no interest to you, it is him the image of the world that you are concerned with. He is a very humble person willing to do anything to survive, he is wise. You are a fair weather woman, when things are good all is great, but you are no good for tough times. Are you the best fit for an obviously good man, I don’t think so.
ReplyDeleteI have not tips for you to get him back. He deserves a humble woman with a good soul.
Selfish witch like poster! From your write up, all you do is talk about your self and what you’ve benefited from him. Literally everything was about take take take take. What value did you add to his life??? You didn’t say 1 thing about what you’ve done. Relationship is is both ways and not one way Thank God he saw your true color and dumbed your ass. God probably allowed him lose that job to see the kind of person he would have married. Find your selfish caliber and date. You’re a very selfish person. Leave that man alone for a better woman that will build him up and build together. Imagine the only time he needed your help, you no fit, you didn’t help. Leave him alone! He’s done with the relationship. SELFISH WoMAN!!! I’m so pissed off.
ReplyDeleteShe lost a good man. He on the other hand, dodged a bullet.
ReplyDeleteBut y would I get my bf a job in the same organization where I work? U guy are the same people that preach no office romance. You people are despicable. Get advice on this blog on your own peril. Gosh
ReplyDelete😂! Pele.
DeleteIf it’s not the same organization, can’t she check out other places for him? She no get empathy abeg. She just doesn’t have it period.
DeleteThis post shows how some men and women got damaged so much that their spouses are at their wits end relating with them. Imagine this man thinking all women are like Poster. Na original gbege for his next woman. But God pass human beings. May God help him recover fast and fully.
ReplyDelete