Welcome to your normal bumper to bumper gist post....No sleep ooooooo *sideeyes*
Friday, August 08, 2025
62 comments:
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I'm home watching flatmates.
ReplyDeleteNo light o
DeleteEnjoy yourself dear
The Child Doesn’t Care Who Was Right—They Just Know Dad is Missing.
DeleteLet’s stop sugarcoating:
The child doesn’t care who was right—
They just know Dad is missing.
She says it’s his fault.
He says she pushed him out.
The court takes her side.
The church stays quiet.
And the system cashes in.
Meanwhile, the child sits at the window,
Waiting for a man who’s no longer allowed to knock.
Let’s get to the cold truth:
---
1. Most fathers don’t abandon their kids—
They get erased.
It didn’t start with neglect.
It started with her rewriting the script.
She made the home a courtroom.
Every mistake was evidence.
Every disagreement became a crime.
He didn’t walk away because he didn’t care.
He left because he wasn’t allowed to stay.
And now?
She tells the world,
“He left us.”
No—
She just changed the locks and kept the kids.
---
2. We turned “fatherhood” into “funding.”
Pay child support.
Pay for school.
Pay for Christmas.
But don’t ask questions.
Don’t correct behavior.
Don’t show up uninvited.
Modern culture says,
“Be a provider.”
But the moment he tries to parent?
He’s told:
“You’re controlling.”
“You’re toxic.”
“You’re overstepping.”
The system doesn’t want fathers.
It wants funders.
---
3. The child sees everything—
Even when you think they don’t.
They hear her talk down about him.
They watch her delete his name from memories.
They feel the tension in every holiday.
She posts selfies.
He pays court fees.
And the child?
They carry the silence.
This is how identity breaks—
Quietly.
Slowly.
Permanently.
---
4. Being a mother doesn’t make you a martyr.
If you’re using the kids as leverage—
That’s not motherhood. That’s manipulation.
If you’re scheduling visitation like it's a favor—
That’s not co-parenting. That’s punishment.
And if your entire parenting strategy is “make him suffer”—
You’re not raising children.
You’re raising emotional orphans.
Because while you’re busy trying to win...
The child is losing a father.
---
5. Most men aren’t deadbeats—
They’re just defeated.
He didn’t disappear because he didn’t love his kids.
He disappeared because he got tired of proving it.
Tired of fighting the courts.
Tired of proving he’s not a threat.
Tired of watching his child get raised like a guest.
He didn’t quit out of selfishness.
He quit because the system buried him alive in paperwork and pain.
---
6. Single motherhood should be a recovery plan—
Not a relationship strategy.
We glorify women doing it alone.
But nobody talks about the trauma.
Boys grow up angry.
Girls grow up confused.
And both grow up thinking love is supposed to hurt.
TikToks won’t fix that.
Trendy “soft life” speeches won’t change that.
Two parents raise balance.
One parent—by force or pride—raises chaos.
---
Final Word:
Stop lying to the child.
They’ll grow up and find out the truth.
Stop pretending courts are fair.
They reward custody with no accountability.
Stop calling men deadbeats
When you’ve built a culture that beats them dead emotionally.
And to the man thinking of walking away?
Stay.
Even if she makes it hell.
Even if the court drains you.
Even if your child forgets your voice.
Because when a father leaves—
He doesn’t leave alone.
He takes the structure with him.
And leaves a wound that therapy can’t always fix.
So be the father who stays.
Not because it’s easy—
But because everyone pays the price when you don’t.
— ELONAIRES
Please cancel this toxic nonsense. Deadbeat fathers are deadbeat!!! no matter how much you try to sugarcoat it. Not all fathers are deadbeat of course but if they truly care they will be there for the kids. Stop painting today's mothers as some sort of vengeful people. Don't you think they want the best for their child? But some fathers are useless and I'm glad that today's society doesn't enable them as much as before.
DeleteTGIF.
ReplyDeleteThis raining is becoming too much.
Rain will soon stop..
DeleteThem fit name you Solomon
ReplyDeleteMake Nigerian girls still save your contact as
"solo mugu 1 onitsha "
This one wey stranger don dey call me baby this evening like this,
what's happening??
Wait first !
Make I check my wallet well
Nnaa isi gini
DeleteSolo mugu1 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Biko check that wallet oo e dey important 😄
Glo........ smiles
DeleteOvulation Cramps+Internal and External Cold=2 Shots of Tequila and Under the Duvet= Crashing Out.
ReplyDeleteHello Everyone!!!
Hey yummy mummy
DeleteDooh dear
DeletePele ore mi
DeleteYou dey use the appropriate glass for tequila abi na jug you dey use for shot? 🤣
Please, take care 🤗
Ndo nne. Only gin is good for the weather 🤪
DeleteSweet Choco Darling.
DeleteThanks Mor..
Oremi Lora mo nìì Shot glass gotten from Schnapps, Tequila is Harsh😃😃😃.Beautiful Blogbrity, Trueeeee
Nostalgic Friday.....
ReplyDeleteReminiscing the good old days and the memories it left in my heart. Sometimes I feel bad not living my dreams. Nigeria failed a good number of people.
Faded dreams....
© TEEJAY
Why blame Nigeria for your failures? So many young people are making oak trees out of seedlings. Look inwards and redouble your efforts and God shall grant you success. Stop playing a victim always - you have ample time and age on your side. You said you studied Accounting so why didnt you do ICAN?
DeleteI ask again, why didnt you do the ICAN exams? I did accounting and struggled to do the ICAN exams - it was the turning point in my life. Pls stop blaming anyone else or Nigeria for failing you. Our lives are in our hands and God shall bless our endeavours
DeleteNo one will ever care for you better than you do. Take care of yourself because you really matter too.
ReplyDeleteCheers to the weekend fam 🥂🥂🥂
True. 🥂 to the weekend.
DeleteReal talk
DeleteHow have you been?
Honestly no one will
DeleteCheers handsome 🥂😍
DeleteCraving for shawarma and stepping it down with yogurt, and that is what I will be having tonight😋, I hope doctor of the future is not on this blog.
ReplyDeleteEven if! Abeg, enjoy yourself.
DeleteThe butter we have at home now tastes like there's too much milk in it. Presently eating it and rolling my eyes while thinking of what the "healthy people" will say if they see me. Wo, we will be alright.
We will be alright o my sister 🥰
DeleteMy people another Friday don land o. TGIF! I just land for my joint. I’m drinking a very cold beer and gisting with waitress about BBNaija while waiting for my guy to land to download one gist o. He say he dey look through him wife laptop and he saw google searches about how to cash out after divorce in Naija. Omo, the guy wan crase o 😅
ReplyDeleteThings no too dey okay for him house since him wife catch am say he got back from travel and decided to go guest house to operate for the weekend instead of going straight home 😂
Last week over enjoyment wan kill me o. Salary enter my account and I just rush go meet my guys for Mainland. Omo, olosho cheap for that side o. As we park in front of one joint dey follow some olosho talk, na so police show o. See as all my guys and the oloshos tear race. Me wey dey piss, na so the popo grab me. Them say dem wan carry me dey go station o. Wetin be my offence dem no gree tell me o. I gas dash dem something before dem free me. Na wa for our police for that side o. Anyhow, e no stop me from operation sha 😅
Anyhow my guy don land. Make I listen to gist jor. Happy weekend to una.
How long will you continue this lifestyle???
DeleteI pray you find a partner and settle down.
Menstrual cramps have been dealing with me but my husband just came home early and has been rubbing my tummy 😊
DeleteIf not that I’m on my period I would have climbed this man cowgirl style🥹 cos this weather is not smiling ☺️
@ Anon 20:53 sorry for the cramps ok, don't worry it's a thing of few days you go enjoy your cowgirl style well
DeleteAlways play safe handsome 👍
DeleteSome day it will be over.. fantastic weekend I wish us all
ReplyDeleteThe weather is so cold. Not for the faint hearted.
ReplyDeleteNo be lie. After reading my bible, will just go to bed.
Delete© TEEJAY
Aswear! It's even colder in my house than it is outside. All windows are closed and ordinary fan sef,I no dey on. I don't even understand anymore.😔
DeleteTJ, what of your wife na?
DeleteAnon,
DeleteShe's fine. Thank you.
© TEEJAY
No sleep ke, na sleeping mood I dey oooo, after a stressful day and week
ReplyDeleteAswear BJ what a stressful week and stressful day too
DeleteIt's well oo😉
Although the hustle always pay I thank God for that sha
Trying to meet up with my customers chat, Omo this online biz no be beans oo😞
Orders bokwu
Delivery bokwu chai
Una good evening oo😘
This weekend I holy.. no bad things planned
ReplyDeleteMake i focus on God
Finish taking hot tea now watching cartoon with the kids.
ReplyDeleteI'm watching BBN wager task and the team meat based diet are killing it. I'm sure the house will win their wager the week.
ReplyDeleteI don't get to watch the parties and evening activities this season, once my husband leaves for the bedroom I dey join am fiam. Who BBN epp 😁
Team Meat based are so Articulate Dr Faith is indeed Brilliant.
DeleteI Love!!!!!!
Why do we have oversabi tenant in a compound; particularly when the landlord does not live in the compound. Our once quiet and unified compound now have an unofficial caretaker who thinks he is the landlord.
ReplyDeleteHahaha... Sorry i'm laughing, just finished watching "our neighbor has gone crazy again"
DeleteIs this new Friday Amebo banner ? So loving it. That guy behind the ladies could pass for oko ahewo waiting for his cold beer while eyeing one babe🤭
ReplyDeleteGisting with My Pop over k1 saga, I don Laugh tire here.
Will watch Tyler Perry's Sistas to sleep off..
Restful night 👋🏻
Only you dey watch 3 series in a week 😄
DeleteLol sure
DeleteJewelu wey say make we nor sleep release comments naa 😂
ReplyDeleteThose ladies up there are beautiful I wish I can carry one go house tonight
ReplyDeleteTake your Bible or Koran to house tonight!
DeleteHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
DeleteGo carry nah, you are free
DeleteAudio beauty 😀😄
Poor girls. Nothing in those handbags. Not even 2k. All they got is in between their legs.
DeleteWelcome Friday night post..
ReplyDeleteHope everyone is good?
All the must God to our God..
Well Friday night post..
ReplyDeleteHope everyone is good?
All the glory must go to our God..
Who is worthy of appraise.. no man on Earth should take glory to himself..
Thank you Jesus..
Because it's only you there can do these
Hey everyone🥰🥰
ReplyDeleteI've been on a search for a good school for my kids here but so far I haven't made a headway yet. Mbok,are there BVs here who reside in Dammam, Saudi Arabia? Any suggestions would be highly appreciated. Schools here will resume 24th August.
And my goodness,nothing prepared me for the intense heat during the day.😱I'm just thankful the heat will be over 11 days from now.💃
Also, I have an interview slated for Sunday. I'm wondering whether I'll need to cover my hair or just dress in my pants and a jacket without the hair cover.
I pray I get the job.😇😇
Fierce 💅
I pray you get the job ,.....
DeleteAmen. Thank you Foodie
DeleteFierce 💅
Check the expat forums for SA to see what folks are saying. You could ask about schools there too. See if there is an online Naija community forum and read the posts. Ask Ai if all else fails. If there is a place where they publish test scores for schools you can use it to get an idea of school rankings and you can use that to help you choose. Most importantly, ensure you are involved in your children’s education. Being in a completely different culture and country can be imposing, they need your support and connection si they can succeed.
ReplyDeleteGood luck on the interview. Use your sixth sense and if it feels off, trust your guts.
Thank you so very much. I didn't think about the expart forums.
DeleteFierce 💅
Thanks again for all your contributions Anon 8:47. Blessings!
Delete