IN A DILEMAN
Daily blessings Stella,
It's been a while but I remembered you now because of the candid advice I got from the blog years ago when I was naive and just started life. And to be honest life has been good. Glory to God. I have been married for 2 years+ and my home is well, built on God and sweet gbenshing.
It's been a while but I remembered you now because of the candid advice I got from the blog years ago when I was naive and just started life. And to be honest life has been good. Glory to God. I have been married for 2 years+ and my home is well, built on God and sweet gbenshing.
Last year I got pregnant and I'm due soon. The journey has been sweet from the get-go, glow is blinding , my career is progressing and I'm confident to say I'm God's favorite.
My major challenge is choosing the type of birth option either vaginal or elective caesarean section. My doctor has advised all is well for vg birth and even elaborated on possible cases of cs going wrong. But I'm worried my vg won't be the same again once I push a baby out and thus affecting my vg size.
My major challenge is choosing the type of birth option either vaginal or elective caesarean section. My doctor has advised all is well for vg birth and even elaborated on possible cases of cs going wrong. But I'm worried my vg won't be the same again once I push a baby out and thus affecting my vg size.
Most people I asked for advice only end up scaring me with their birth stories and still tell me to go natural. I need advice and honest opinion, before making a final decision.
1.Is it possible to have a good sxxual life after birth tear.
2. Does the vg go back to initial tightness
3. Is Cs recovery that difficult.
I can afford to pay for a cs rather than a vaginal reconstruction surgery later down the line if anything goes wrong. Ps I'm an only child and my mom's daily prayer is against cs.
I'm just confused on how the cs option is stigmatized/ considered a bad thing. Still want to enjoy good n gripping sxx even though Im becoming a mother soon.
Looking forward to your red pen with honest advice only either good or raw. Blowing baby kisses to all TTC moms.
Looking forward to your red pen with honest advice only either good or raw. Blowing baby kisses to all TTC moms.
Hmmmmmmm........The pain of CS knocked me out but i have also seen some people who did CS and got up the same day....The pain of CS varies from person to person but the worst ever is normal birth which pieces the kpekus and most people never recover from the tear..
If you ask me, my bad advice will be that you opt for CS and leave kpekus birth for the alleged hebrew women.
I am pro CS not necessarily because I think vaginal birth is dangerous (fortunately for me the only time I had one, the baby was really tiny) but because I found CS less traumatic and I was up by the third day.
ReplyDeletePls my dear think about the safest options, follow your doctor's advice, mine I had tears and it was stitched by the doctor after delivery, he said and I quote, "I will stitch it so your oga can enjoy" 28 years later 3 boys after this, I still cry during penetration, which didn't even happen before I got pregnant for my first, we still use Vaseline, so just pray and ask for wisdom, like I said your health and the baby's is the first priority, no matter how tight na only God dey keep life and marriage ooo
Delete15:15, vaseline isn't really good for vaginal health. Try water wased lubricant instead.
DeleteWow!Such an applause to the blog 👏👏
ReplyDeleteFor the best choice of delivery i think doctors or the mothers here will tell you better
Wishing you safe deliveries in anyways🥰
You must not be seen on every post na madam.
DeleteAss licker rest
Deletei have had 4 children with no tear and we are good
ReplyDeleteNo tear as in? You mean you gave birth through vg without tear?
DeleteMy Cs was smooth and I recovered quickly to the amazement of many,like Stella said,the pain varies for different peeps
ReplyDeleteIn my own opinion, I can't say the worst pain between CS and VJ delivery, for natural birth, if there's no any complications, you will forget the pain easily and if you have a flat tummy before pregnancy, if they press your stomach very well with hot water according to Yoruba traditional way(I don't know if other tribes do it), and also sit down on bucket of hot water and let the steam enter your vj, all the black blood will come out and your stomach will go back to factory reset in no time, if you don't even tell people that you've given birth before, nobody will know because of your flat tummy, but the aspect of your VJ still remaining the same, it depends on your body, some have never given birth but they're loose down there.
ReplyDeleteFor CS, the pain will still be there for some weeks and the scars will be there for ever, you may or never regain your flat tummy if you had it before pregnancy, because you can't press your stomach if you do CS and if your stomach will go down, it will take some time.
Natural birth is painful before and during the delivery if there's no any complications, while CS is painful after delivery according to my own experiences.
You can do anyone that suits you, it shall be a safe delivery in respective of any option you choose.
All because you want to sexually please a man who is already enjoying himself with other side chickens and even vultures out there. Continue. Disobey your mum and watch your offspring disobey you in old age
ReplyDeleteIs everything ok
DeleteWhere did she mention man here?? She obviously enjoys sex and don't want anything that will affect her sex life, please take it easy!!!
I have had 3 cs and one vaginal birth, please go for CS. Do elective CS so you don't experience that horrible labour pain.
Best wishes
Haba anon 15:42 easy nah🙄
DeleteNever experienced CS but I do know that virginal delivery is easier for me to recover.
ReplyDeleteNo one easy . The cleaning of the surgery site .
Stella ooo alleged Hebrew women. Poster let God take charge in whatever decision you make. No be by who do pass na by God mercy and grace
ReplyDeleteIf there is no medical emergency and you're up to it. You can deliver naturally. Vagina delivery does nothing to it.
ReplyDeleteI have 4 children and I had one CS, (my third born) . In my personal experience, I dint heal well from the CS , until I had my last born seven years later.it was such a miracle that my wounds closed and healed permanently by itself, even though I had vg birth for my fourth. The choice is up to you...I prefer VG birth, though the pains in labour, is another thing. I love the healing process and I like to get up as fast as I could to start little exercise. Consistent not too rigorous exercise has been helpful for almost 14 years, even in pregnancies. If there good doctors or nurses on ground to manage the tears well..Y not? I do pelvic floor exercise 3 times a week back to back for 14 years and I'm very good. Cs does not guarantee VG thightness, after multiple pregnancies, staying healthy and exercise whenever you can is more reliable, age factor and the rest are all contributing factors.
ReplyDeletePoster, if doctor confirm VG birth ok for you, please birth through that. Don't worry about your Vg becoming loose because it can be fixed without going through surgery. My vg was so loose that hubby tin usually slip out which usually cause me so much embarrassment but because he was the one who dis-flowered me, I was a bit relaxed. Right now, He can hardly penetrate me. I took Kegel exercise seriously by holding my urine every 5seconds when urinating. I was also washing my vg with cloves warm water. I don't know which of them tightened me up
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing. We learn everyday
DeleteI think you having these thoughts, CS should be the best option for you. You're already afraid of the tears that you might be getting and the pain that you will go through. CS should be the best option for you since you have the money
ReplyDeletewhich ever option you go for, wishing you safe delivery. I will say that any means a woman picked to bring forth a child/children does not matter or make her less as long as the mother and child are alive.
ReplyDeleteJust go for the CS my dear. Down there can never be the same.
ReplyDeletePeople recover and react differently. I had a CS cos the labor wasn’t progressing and the bay was in distress. However it took me days to recover and I was extremely gassy. Pooping was difficult and painful. When I eventually was ok to start seggs, it was soooooo painful-I am not ashamed to say I didn’t enjoy it and would sometimes avoid it.
ReplyDeleteI had a colleague that year who had her first child via elective CS-she swore that CS was the best option. Her second child, was via vaginal birth. She changed mouth and said vaginal birth was better cos she experienced both and could give her 2 cents.
At the end of the day, everyone’s experience is different. I didn’t have the option of a vaginal birth cos labor wasn’t progressing so I would ever remain grateful that people like me have the option of a CS to save our lives. It’s your choice-weigh the risks and decide. Remember that a CS is a surgery and it will come with its own risks. Also pray about it-do this first.
Using tight kpekus as an excuse to go for CS is wrong mind set. There is back and waist pain, knee pain and spinal pain all are side effects that comes with Anesthetics. As a mother who have had 2 vaginal birth and 2 CS, I wish you safe delivery.
ReplyDeleteI’ve had 3 CSs and was up early the next morning. I ate jollof rice and chicken on the evening of the CS day sef. My CSs were elective so labour never started so I wouldn’t know what it felt like.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I’ve witnessed labour pains twice and don’t think I would have preferred it.
I don’t have scars either because I was given a bikini line cut.
Poster, do what you think is best for you.
Dear Poster, do what is right for you and not for any man . Your reasons for CS are so funny( to me). You ( or do i read Husband) want to remain tight for good sex. The 15:51 poster who talked of the "extra snip"... i am hearing of it for the first time happening in Nigeria. This practice is actually frowned upon because they stich the entrance to the vagina which is different from the actual inside where the slackness happens. he might experience tightness when entering but there will still be slackness inside. I also learnt that it is men that request such... of course for their own pleasure, now see her enduring pain . When you now cant take it anymore and get turned off sex, he will still use it as an excuse to look outside. I know that no one is asking me, but in the early years of my marriage, my husband was disturbing me to douche. I refused because i had read all about its negative side effects( Everywoman was my female anatomy bible back then). More than 20 years down the line, imagine this same man is showing me medical reports about the negative side effects of douching!! One thing you can consider is trying to keep the baby small by managing your food. I did it with my last baby and he "popped out" so easily because he was small ( but healthy). You seem far gone but you can still consider it. The myth of eating for two is what is leading to women birthing massive babies that expand their vaginas and give them tears. I could tell stories about this for ages. Whatever you choose, do it for you and ensure you make an informed decision. All the best.
ReplyDeleteI prefer CS.No pushing or pussy tearing.
ReplyDeleteWhichever you choose, dear, I wish you all the best. You will come back with a testimony.
ReplyDeleteHmmm. This is dicey. I had my two kids vaginally. And I know my v-jay is not the same. It doesn't have the grip it used to have. I've been doing kegels, but it's still not the same. According to scott from keeping up with the Kardashians, he said it's like it's the same room, but some things have been rearranged 🤣 all the best to you dear
ReplyDeletestella,this your advise got me laughing..My sister had 3 Cs for her son's she didn't chose it, that's how she birthed her sons...so in all let everything go well..poster whether cs or vj birth, all we wish for is for and your baby to be healthy,strong and alive...none supersedes the other... Baby dust to all TTC..God bless and protect you
ReplyDeleteI had back to back vaginal births. It was early for me. I couldn't stand the thought of needles for CS. Also my babies were small. I only required a small stitch with the second baby. She was 7 lbs 6oz. I'm still very tight down there 14 years after. Please do what you're comfortable with. Our bodies are different
ReplyDelete*easy not early
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