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Saturday, August 08, 2020

Saturday In House Gists - Discussing Genotype Before Marriage

This is a very sensitive topic that has been hammered on lots of times but some people have deaf ears,so we need to continue making posts like this for them to read!











If you meet someone and you fall in love and see a future,please do not take any step further until you confirm the genotype (pronounced as jenəˌtīp)!!!

Why are people lying about this?even men telling lies about their genotypes to be able to marry their dream Ladies?


When is the right time to discuss genotype and in what ways can one find out the genotype of a lover without asking?

Who is currently battling letting go of their dream lover cos the genotype aint right together?won't you tell them the break up lyrics?or will you hold on and let this go far until you bring in a sick baby?Who currently has a baby from a wrong genotype with their lover and the child is currently exhibiting the phenotype of the genotype.... (genotype refers to genetic code and phenotype the physical ish from the genotype)


Someone told me yesterday that her wedding plans was called off cos her best friend told him that she was AS;said she planned a time to tell him and see if they could out figure something after the wedding.....


I was wondering,is this genotype thing only found in the black race?

if you are currently with someone you should not be with,please break it off if you intend to have kids!

Lets gist!!!

78 comments:

  1. I think it be nice if it's known before anything serious can happen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you jesus, this phase is draining chai, I used to sleep on google and SDK searching for reviews on CVS, I used to think IVF was something you just walk into the hospital and do(because the way people talk about IVF ba you will think it is simple biko it is not ooooo the bad part was that I have phobia for needle then I did my research and got to the part where I will be injecting my self lol person wan give me injection self I dey run). But truly it is not easy breaking up a sweet relationship because of genotype and who else noticed that a relationship where there is genotype issues mostly seem to be sweet and lovely the genotype is always the only BUT. So walking away is always difficult, i left my relationship of 8years worst pain of my life but I stood up and got myself back together now married to someone you is AA. I know the process is hard take your time but leave the relationship because seeing your child sick is not worth it and also taking shots and going through mental stress is not worth it either. You guys will fight have normal disagreements and you as a lady will be expecting him to worship your feet because you choose to do CVS and IVF. Madam it was your decision nobody owes you nothing. So please now that you are single make sure you make the right call and don't let anyone rush you into breaking up

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    2. I too lost a long term relationship due to AS. We almost went through with it.

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    3. Right from when I was little, my mum always made me to understand that I was AS and the implications of that. The love of my life turned out to be AS, and I broke up after like 4years, cos I was always thinking one day there will be a remedy, but it never happened. One think I've realised is that AS-AS love can be so sweet, you don't want to leave. Buy I had to leave at some point.but I'm married now to someone really amazing. I thank GOD for that. Please don marry your fellow AS person cos of love, cos the consequences are dire

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    4. My colleague a Muslim broke off his relationship with his wife to be as a result of this.

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  2. I have had two marriage Proposal cut off because of genotype. I am AS.
    The surprising thing is that the very best i have had relationship wise were these two, others that were AA were just heartbreaks. The last one even begged that we can find a way through it, we can adopt, and all that. But i know he is just being too emotional and loved up. This is forever journey, mine would come and if not Jesus remains Lord.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwwww. The Lord who gives good gifts, will bring the right man your way.❤️❤️

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    2. Awwwww. I pray you get a good AA man, if you haven't😊😊😊

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    3. Yours will definitely come dear

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    4. 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

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    5. yours will definitely come 💕

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    6. It is well with you Miss Ess.

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  3. I believe that if people really have a relationship with Jesus and he shows them
    whom to marry, all these issues about genotype will be overcome.
    God gives good and perfect gifts.
    We work out that gift just as we acquire good character by giving heed to his word.
    The problem is that most peoples shut him out of their lives.
    They grope in the darkness all their lives and are injured by grave but avoidable mistakes.
    We (that believe in Christ) work by faith, not by sight.
    🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God will not give you a gift that will become a problem in guture

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    2. Can you just stop it, stop twisting the word of God somebody dating that had genotype issues doesn't mean the person was walking in darkness. And stop bragging all you have is grace and God's grace is sufficient for everybody even those that sins,

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    3. @15:22
      God's MERCY is sufficient unto sinners, not Grace.
      We shall not continue in sins that Grace may abound Romans 6:1
      Please teach me about the one you wrote and give me scripture quotations.

      Delete
  4. Is today Sunday?

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  5. The truth is, I don't even bother to ask because mine is AA. I think is good to ask oh, before the love becomes too much and to let go, will be so difficult.

    I have a friend that is As, all the men that comes to her, have same genotype with her. It's well sha

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    Replies
    1. I don't bother myself as well cos I'm AA.

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    2. You're lucky o. Mine is AC.

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    3. Who are the group of people that are not asking fall in line for your cane, what is wrong with you guys don't you get tired of heartbreak after Hello, he gets your number and you start chatting, even if you can't say it physically then send it as message, all of this should happen even before revealing where you are from. Please guys let us help ourselves to be happy

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    4. Same here, I don't bother to ask cos I'm also AA

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  6. My sister broke up with a man she loved deeply. It was so painful for her but It was the right decision. I know she did the right thing. When you think about SS kids, it's a NONO.

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    Replies
    1. I broke a 6years relationship because of genotype. I told him I was AS immediately we started the relationship o, he lied that he was AA, thank God for his brother that later told me the truth that they are all AS. It wasn't easy but I had to break the relationship because I know a family that Sickle cell is showing shege. I can't come and suffer for love.

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  7. Is it Sunday already?🙄

    When my cousin found out that the guy she was planning to was AS (she's AS as well) she called to cancel but the guy insisted and was pleading with her and the family. He said that they will do IVF to have babies but my coz is not cut out for that.
    The guy was heartbroken but hey.



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  8. Sdk ,I think you should include it on single and mingles ,it will help alot .my opinion

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  9. This genotype thing that my husband used to scare me.

    Well into the relationship, he called me one day and out of the blues asked me my genotype. I was quite certain we had discussed this previously and he told me he was AA and u had told him I was As.

    I sha reminded him that I'm AS. He now exclaimed and told me he's also AS. I told him lai lai, that we had discussed this before and he said he was AA. He said that we never discussed it and that was the first time he was knowing I was AS.

    He was so convincing that I believed him and then he asked what we were now to do.

    In all honesty, I started considering all options because I just wasn't going to lose this good man I had been dating for years to this. Wrong I know but that was just it. I started thinking about all those system they said they have put in place to have AS couple successful have non SS children.

    He now sent a message sometime later that he was just pulling my legs that he's AA and we had infact discussed it before. Nna, I practically swore and cursed at him but I was so relieved.


    I just hope I can give birth to just AA children so they don't have to suffer heartbreaks and aborted relationships just because of their genotype

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Eka. What you just wrote is the reason why we must do ALL
      necessary tests before catching any feelings. See as you were reconsidering other options that had him in it. Love makes us do unwise things. I don't even trust word of mouth. I believe that a man/woman can tell you what he/she wants you to hear to get into a relationship.

      I remember a corper that served in my place of work years ago and started dating a Playboy colleague of mine. I tried dissuading her but the heart wants what the heart wants. She even reported me to the guy. Anyway sha, after the guy had had his fill, guyman told her he was AS. This was something they discussed at the onset and he assured her he was AA. This girl cried and let the relationship go because of their genotype. All the while they were doing there back and forth, my colleague, who was also my close friend (he took me under his wings like a big brother. I was closer to him than my biological brother) confided in me that he was actually AA but was done with the relationship and had to tell her something to make it easier to break up. Never told her as I learnt my lessons at the beginning of their relationship

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  10. For me I don’t see why I can’t marry As just bcos I am As. A lot of people have gotten rid of their God given partner bcos of this thing. A lot of people that don’t end up with their partners ends up just settling for anyone. The pain of looking at a man knowing fully well that I don’t love you but settled bcos your genotype matches with mine is awful.😢 anyways here in Canada, technology is improving by the day. There are medications now that you can be placed on even before you conceive your child just to correct this issue. A lot of people are in unhappy marriages today just bcos of this. Lastly must all marriages produce children? Can’t we adopt all our kids? Just saying oh. I know a lot of people will say not in nijia and I get it. I wish us all well o. The As thing can be a pain honestly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So bringing innocent children to suffer in this world is worth your selfish desires? Yes. I said it. Selfish!

      Go to the hospital and see the horrors SS kids in crisis go through. See the pain when they are buried. Many marriages have ended because the parent (most often the man) can't deal with the issues anymore and abandon the kid or kids with the mother. Love flies out the window. The man finds the AA woman to give him kids without SS. Love has disappeared.

      And please, don't use that term "God-given partner". I refuse to believe that God will give one a partner with full knowledge that you both will bring in an innocent SS child to suffer and die. All those you're assuming would have been happier with the person they had to let go, how do you know that if they had ignored all the warnings and had gotten together, they would still be married to each other and happy? Can you guarantee it? NO. Those who settled CHOSE to settle. If they had been patient and waited a bit longer, maybe they would have found that person that they'll be happy getting married to.

      As for looking to science, hope you know some of the procedures involves aborting a child that would turn up SS? Is it worth breaking God's law regarding life?

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    2. Please reconsider your stance...no matter d technology available, frequent trips to the hospital for one procedure or the other can be draining and love can fly out of the window when d mental stress becomes toomuch.

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    3. Swit@🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗, you will be fine take your time, do all the research, have all the fun till you are ready to break up

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  11. Had a distant aunt that broke up with the love of her life then due to AS ish! The guy too was AS,he pleaded so they can marry but she declined and told him when an SS child comes now with too many sickness an all,can he handle it? He said love conquers all...she told him the love will disappeared from him due crisis so no need to proceed! She wept bitterly and was broken but it was for the best! She has since gotten married with 2kids now to AA man

    I'm AA but still I do ask so I can know yours and if there's any other health challenges

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I had a cousin too in this scenario. Everything happens for the best cos marriage is more than love to keep it together. Bad health can be financially draining. God give us and ours good health always in Jesus name amen.

      Delete
  12. I cancelled my engagement when I learnt that my partner was AS. He pleaded that we should carry on that there will be a way out. I refused blatantly. Forever is too long to live with sick kids and being emotionally drained.

    So, the discussion comes up before I agree to date any guy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It must have been really painful,but you did the right thing 💜

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    2. It was, Lee Lee. Thank God for the grace to move on.

      Hope you had a great day?❤️❤️

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    3. Can imagine how painful it was. You did the right thing💕

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  13. Are we still discussing this in 2020? Please, once you know you're AS, the moment you meet someone and you feel it may become more, know their genotype. Once marriage is in the corner, go together and do tests to reconfirm to avoid stories that touch. True, some are fortunate and end up having kids who are not SS but that's not often the case.

    In other news, me that is AA haven't even been in a relationship for over 5 years but I'm seeing other ladies enter and come out of relationships because of genotype issues. I offend somebody?

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    Replies
    1. 😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆

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    2. Omg, this is so funny. I had a good laugh 🤣🤣😂😂🤣

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  14. Its better to discuss it earlier in the relationship to avoid the problem of letting go.

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  15. On the day I decide to date a guy. I ask though I am AA

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  16. Me that when my now husband was asking me out, I gave him some conditions that had to be meet before we started dating or even kissing (I insist same for all guys that come my way). We both went for test in a reputable lab. I don't want all these road side labs that one party can go back behind the other to influence the results. Dude laughed at first because no girl had made any such demands from him, especially since the relationship wasn't something we thought was serious then(I wanted to chop clean mouth😁😁). He saw how serious I was and he submitted himself to the lab of my choice. We both did HIV, genotype and blood group then( if it's now I would have added hepatitis. I didn't know of it then Sha). We both went to collect the result and saw we were both certified ok. That day was the first time I kissed him. Ran across the results some weeks back and we had a good laugh. All these happened about 11 years ago and we've been married for 8.

    You see, I know why I did what I did. I didn't want to be carried away by lust/love later and then throw my common sense into the gutter. Besides, we were both AA. Although I knew I was AA, I didn't want to put my offspring through the pains of not marrying who their hearts yawn for because of my mistake. Even if I don't leave riches for my kids, I know I left an untinted bloodline (sorry if I sound selfish but that is how I feel).

    Even though hubby was assuring me of his status, I didn't believe him cos I wanted to see for myself. This here is a reason I can not pity selfish couples that come and say, "he/she lied. I was deceived. I love him/her", blah blah blah.
    Young couple should do all necessary findings at the onset of a relationship. Before you even go to his house or share a first kiss

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  17. I used to date a sickle cell person. He was nice and all, infact he was the best guy then. The fear i experienced ehn..I cancelled our engagement cos my mind wasn't at peace. I can imagine how marraige would have been

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  18. We all are AA in my family so I was never bothered during my single days. Hubby is AS though, I'm yet to check my kids' own, when I do, I will make sure to advise them on time on how to go about relationships.

    There's need to also discuss rhesus factor as this is another problem area. Single girls should beware of this so they don't destroy themselves.

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  19. I have said my story before, I know As and As that married, they have 2kids now. I believe God had ordained their marriage. Though luckily for them , they do that test of amniotic fluid abi wetin at 5months to know the genotype of the baby and both times the baby hasn't been SS. The only thing about that testing is that you would have to abort if it is SS. And if you have good money kuku go from IVF straight up. No need to beat around the bush on the matter. I don't AS-AS union as impossible any more if you have the money.

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  20. It’s only in black race o... white people no know genotype thingy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They do, some diseases such as cystic fibrosis are genetic. As such, in such cases, intending couples also have to be aware and screen for these. 😉

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    2. Thanks. I just googled this

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  21. My dear. I am AS. This AS issue is a big one. The guys that always toast me are AS too (First question I ask). Now, I date only white men. No stress. It's just this uncircumcised penis issue.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe you're dating mostly British and Europeans. Most Americans and Canadians are circumcised.

      Delete
  22. I'm AA but in the course of traditional investigations called IJU ESE during our marriage proceedings,it nearly rocked our boat because I had many cousins with sickle cell genes,some from my hubby's side said lailai I was too lanky that they want proof,we had to do tests and show results.

    Even on the D-day some of them were throwing shocking tantrums from their canopy as many laughed their hearts out.
    I was going round with a glass of palmwine during 'the search'one of his Uncles exclaimed 'Ewww,omakwali mana ogini ka aga enyegide ya ka obue?'(oh,she's very fine o but what are we gonna give her to make her fat?)
    Then my Dad's immediate Bro replied them 'kpolunu naba na oje evbu'(take her home she will get fat).Hahahahahaha.

    Please eh,if the genotype says No,cry to God for another,he will send him.
    Currently,many churches are not wedding them to avoid series of abortions and depression arising from taking care of Sicklers,the journey is not easy.

    PEACE!

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  23. I'm AA...but i dunno why there are too many AS. Can it be reduced atleast? It will be nice to see AS like 2% n AA 98%...eliminating SS completely.

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  24. I remember a neighbour in my former house. According to what she said her husband told her he was AA when they met and since he looked healthy she didn't bother to cross check. She was AS so her mind was at rest. After they got married she got pregnant immediately, few months later the guy had crisis o that was when she knew he was SS not even AS. She gave birth to four children and they are all SS. 1 died in 2010. She's always in and out of the hospital. Always laying curses on her Husband. Even my mum too was keeping malice with the man I had to ask my mum why she was taking panadol for someone else headache. The woman is now very slim and looks wornout because of the stress. All these would have been avoided if the he goat was honest.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is disheartening.

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    2. Terrible!
      I know of a family 2 out of their 5kids are SS. It's really draining for them

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    3. So when she found out the man's status why did she continue giving birth? She's also to be blamed along side the man

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    4. @ anon you're absolutely right they both should share the blame

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  25. Atimes we do our best to run away from things that could cost us our happiness but if thoroughly God is the one bringing you people together, no force can stop that.

    Me and my husband is 10years in Marriage now and we have three children and the last one is Ss. When my husband meet me,he told me straight that he wanted to marry me,we went for tests and his genotype was reconfirmed AA. I insisted we did it for the third time because a very close friend of mine had 2 SS children and they are always in and out of the hospital,it was confirmed for the third time that he was AA.when I had my third child in America and the did their New born screening and told us my baby was SS we didn't believe it because we did test severally to confirm our genotypes,my husband told me not to worry as the lord never showed him that we will be having a sick child, he said maybe they mean the trait,I told him no that the meant SS.Onyibo people started calling up and down to do some counselling for me on how to handle the child,u checked Google on several things my husband family over there kept asking me if I slept with another man, I told her no that am so much in love with my husband to even look at another man,then my husband just told me to concentrate and get all the papers that we will find out everything once I return. He was planning on taking my other two children to go and do some blood work because he was so surprise that we had an SS child.so when I got back and we went to sickle cell foundation here in Lagos, they took his blood and the baby's blood and check with the machine the have there, it was confirmed for the very first time thaty husband is also an As and my baby has thisame blood group with him. That the a lot of people fell victim as we, that most of the machines the use in labs to run this test don't pick the homoglobine to show hence it gives their result as AA. So here we are stock with an SS child of a year and four months,I give him his drugs every day and he has never been sick before, he is very chubby and over fresh, each time I take him for his monthly checkup, the Drs keep reminding me that we are in SS department and I have to tell them that am in the right place, they will ask how I found out as the baby in question is very healthy, I will tell them is new born screening that detected it. So for me,I remind God that we didn't come together on purpose that we seeked his face and followed the right procedures but nature brought us to this point,so we are using his life as a testimony that he shall never experience crisis, so we are putting our hope in God.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My husband's younger sister is SS and my MIL told me that since she moved abroad, she's never had crisis for a day. She moved there with pregnancy and had to be admitted with that pregnancy cos it was a difficult one, maybe bcos of her status.

      Her child is about 10 now and since she put to bed, she's never had one crisis at all.

      I think SS gets managed properly abroad or maybe it also has to do with the lack of mosquitoes or other triggering situations

      Delete
    2. This genotype story reminds me of my dilemma.
      Hubby and I married 14years ago with the knowledge he was AA and I AS
      Had our first child(AS)and had delay of 10yrs before the next child.
      Imagine my shock when September last year I was told my baby was SS?
      Turns out the genotype Hubby did before we married (2ce to be precise) was inaccurate.
      Not a easy pill to swallow,but we thank God and with all the medications we're doing good.
      May God perfect his work in our lives because we didn't willingly go into the union knowing we were both AS.

      Delete
    3. May God continue to keep him and bless you guys 💕

      Delete
  26. So one of my family friend is about to make same mistakes with her eyes open in dis age and time.she has been going out with d guy for over 10yrs.d worst part is DAT she's staying with her aunt who are both As and dia kids having frequent crises but she doesn't care I think d marriage is any moment from now.
    MBB

    .z

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. May that log be removed from her eyes in Jesus name

      Delete
  27. I have a friend that is AS dating a girl that is also AS, before they started he asked for my opinion I told him point black that it's a no no for me, gave him all the advice yet he wwmt ahead with the relationship which is leading to marriage very soon, me I done remove my mouth for the matter as e no concern me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pray for GOD to open his eyes before its too late

      Delete
  28. My maternal grandmother had 12 children,only four survived.They all attributed the death of this 8 children to evil unknown to them,they were SS.
    My mom and her three sisters are all As.

    Again,ensure you carry out the test in two good hospitals,a friend of mine was AA in the first test only to discover she was As after the second and third test.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I strongly believed most of the kids who died in the days of our fathers were SS but everything was attributed to evil forces

      Delete
  29. My ex boyfriend swore he was AA and i am AA. I asked that we did a test and he ageeed. When i visited him, he showed me the result from a lab that confirmed he was AA but i really wanted us to do it together. One fateful day he called me that he'd been rushed to the hospital cos he had a fever. I became friendly with the doc and pleaded she did a blood group test too. My brothers and sisters, he was SC and had been lying to me..i didnt react till he was discharged. Sent him an sms and broke up with this murderer of a man. Married 2years later to an AA man.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is wicked, dishonest and selfish for anyone to hide such information

      Delete
  30. Ladies give yourselves sense o. When an SS or AS or SC man promises you an SS or AS babe that you should marry, he will be there for you.....forget the crap cos in sickle cell centres i dont see any fathers carrying children, carrying, caring and crying over their kids. The women and bear the brunt . My aunt bore 5 kids, buried dem one after the other till there was none left. The ape divorced her and married a younger lady.my aunt is 49 but looks 70 today

    ReplyDelete
  31. My cousin just got married to his fiancee this week and both of them are AS. They rejected all the advice they were given and still insisted on going ahead with the wedding..in their words that they will always do a test anytime the wife is pregnant

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They think it is as easy as it sounds. Imagine having an abortion every time the result shows the feotus is ss. That can be so emotionally draining. I wish them all the best though.


      Love is not always enough!

      Delete
  32. I broken off two different relationship because of this genotype ish. To be forewarned...

    ReplyDelete

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