STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
THE PRODIGAL WIFE
Good day stella, please there is something i want to share, and need advice on....
my wife moved out of our matrimonial home without any issue or quarre while i was away in SA for business, and when i found out, she told me if she didn't leave her marriage, she'll die, and i questioned who is brainwashing her because marriage is for better for worse, and i was shocked, and decided to fly back to Nigeria.......
When i came back, i did everything possible to see her, so we could talk about this issue, but all my efforts proved abortive, she blocked me on whatsapp and facebook....
I went to see my mother in law in benin and they told me my wife is sick and she has gone to the mountain for prayers, few months later i found out she had travelled with a man to the UK with our son without my knowledge, and left our daughter behind, so i went to benin with my lawyer and police to get my daughter from my mother in law, and right now, my daughter is with me.....
I cut off every communication with her and her family, because i was deceived by her and her family.....And its been almost a year now, she's been begging to come back and wants that i should let her have access to our daughter and I refused...
But i don't know what to do, i'm confused....
should i accept her back, or should just move on with my life?
I have been warned by family members not to talk to her, because traditions are involved, and i could lose my life if i'm not careful, And I even told her to go to my village and have all the sacrifices done, I am ready to accept her back, but she refused and says traditions are of the devil, so please what should do, she's from uromi, while I'm from ekpoma both in Edo state, please i need advice
*Hmmmmmm,this is a tough one and i can see that you still love her....
So the man she eloped with has dumped her and she wants to return to her vomit?Or she has seen that UK Is not a bed of Roses as portrayed to most people..
Please forgive her and let her see your daughter again but DO NOT TAKE HER BACK AS A WIFE!!!
Please let her move on , she is only seeking for reconciliation because it didn't work out with the person she eloped with.
ReplyDeleteI don't think she is really repentant.
1st get your son back from her. Then go to any welfare or court and get supervised visitation . She must never be left alone with the children. And never YouTube her back. I am a woman,and if you where to be my brother would still tell you same thing. Let her go and enjoy her life. Abi she 4got she would die if still married to you?
DeleteNawa o! This is seriously serious
DeleteNo be small “YouTube” her back@anon 15:22😂😂😂😂
DeleteI assume you are christians. Why perform sacrifices? You can't serve 2 gods.
DeleteThe UK is the most challenging country to live - especially for financially indisciplined and entitled Nigerian ladies (who haven't travelled out and believe any Nigerian man from "abroad" is comfortable). Even for those who travel for vacations there, meet a guy and decide to relocate permanently to join the guy. Most times, it always ends up in tears for the ladies. She will now see that even using toothpaste anyhow and taking bath thrice would result in quarrel (laugh). In this case, she has seen "pepper" with the young man from "London" she ran away with. Things are tough out there mehn! No free dash or "thanks for coming" which the lazy and entitled Nigerian girls are used to. I pray most Nigerian ladies live for just one year abroad and return to Nigeria, in order to have better sense. Not living off this useless money miss road businessmen or politicians in Nigeria.
DeleteFirst, WHAT IF SHE IS INFECTED WITH STD or HIV?
DeleteIn as much as I don't believe in those sacrifices, it applies in my hometown.
If a wife leaves her matrimonial home without any maltreatment from her husband, she must make those traditional sacrifices - (not to gods/idols but asking the kinsmen for forgiveness and a re-enactment of the traditional marriage covenant) before her husband accepts her back.
If she doesn't do this and her husband accepts her back or eats her food , he will die.
I WONDER WHY IT DOES NOT APPLY TO UNFAITHFUL HUSBANDS from my hometown. 🙄😣
Another one is if anyone harms a fellow townsman/woman, there is immediate retribution on the culprit and that lineage.
Who knows - maybe the forefathers had a binding oath or covenant back in the day? 🤔🤷♀️
Young man,
DeleteI wish you mentioned the age of the boy she went with but from experience, it appears you ain’t his father. Don’t take her back but use style to get the boy for DNA test before paying child support which request will come very soon. Good luck and wake up yo.
...a very true and sincere opinion @twins squared....if they leave without an excuse/reason, they should not be accepted back for any reason!
DeleteThis is serious. I don't think I will advice that you take her back as a wife, but you can co parent your kids without any drama involved. Taking her back is risky, you don't even know what she's up to. In seeing her daughter ,she should bring your son too. May God guide your path.
ReplyDeleteShe wants to take the daughter.
DeletePoster, don't you dare take her back...infact na Sango go kill you if you allow her to even come near you or talk to you.
DeleteHmmmmmmmmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteGo and do DNA test for the children...
DeleteSomething is fishy
Yea, the little girl needs her mother.
ReplyDeleteAnd your boy also needs his dad.
I am surprised that you did not mention
having contact with your son in her custody.
The issue of taking her back as wife is entirely your discretion, and I will advise you guided by God, the Lord Jesus and not "traditions and sacrifices to devils."
Giving your life to Jesus and reading his teachings in the New Covenant
everyday is the best thing that can happen to you.
Only he can give you life in abundance; eternal life and life of peace here.
Please do not further complicate your life by bowing to vain idols.
Let the kids' welfare come first right now.
🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
The issue of taking her back as your wife is entirely at your discretion?
DeleteYou are not preaching against divorce now because a man is involved?😁
Chizzy j.
ANG is a man. That's all I deduced from this comment.
DeleteYou will never say this if it is a woman that sent this chronicle.
@Chizzy
DeleteI know you must shoot,
If I advise, you shoot,
If I no advise, you shoot
Nne, ask yourself if "marital unfaithfulness" (Matthew 5:32, 19:9) has occurred here?
I have always maintained that according to what Jesus taught, even in the event
of marital unfaithfulness, it is not of any human to make the call of a divorce. Same
thing, it is not of any human to join two people in marriage. Else it won't be
"what God has joined together..." Mark 10:9
Chizzy sweetie, do you understand me now?
ANG, let me answer for Chizzy J.
DeleteIf you so much as look at a man or woman with lust in your heart, YOU HAVE COMMITTED ADULTERY.
Now ANG answer this, what will you SAY about A WIFE WHO took her husband's son and RAN AWAY WITH ANOTHER MAN? Is that not ADULTERY❗
Yes, the husband could forgive her at his own discretion.
I must say you are EXTREMELY BIASED AGAINST WOMEN.
PARTIALITY is not an attribute of one who professes Christ.
My friend, my friend😁...
DeleteWhat are friends for if not to tease you??
Keep preaching & spreading the world of God without dilluting it, inugo?..
Chizzy j.
Chizzy j.
You should not deny her access to her daughter, it’s good for your daughter’s emotional and psychological development. Is she your ATM that you want to take her back? Even if she is your ATM, it’s not worth it. Get your son and have a relationship with your son too. Your mumu don do . Let her find another mumu to marry.
ReplyDeleteWhen a typical greedy Nigerian girl wants to move out of her matrimonial home, due to meeting abroad or loaded man, she manufactures all the
ReplyDeletelies that do not exist on earth to
achieve her selfish aims.
In the psyche of a lot of Nigerians,
abroad is heaven. That is what this "wife" had gone to and is begging to come back.
Well, if you say she is "prodigal wife."
Remember that the prodigal dad took his son back without "consulting traditional mediums"
Thanks.
This dude told us that "marriage is for better, for worse," didn't he?
ReplyDeleteSo why are you asking us if you should take back your wife in this "worse" situation?
🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
Infidelity is grounds for separation or divorce.
DeleteI wonder too. Oga please forgive and take her back. How about men that abandoned their family for years only to come back begging: still we, will advise that the woman forgives but now the reverse is the case.
DeleteOga from all you said up there,you're still in love with your wife. If you feel what you guys left off can be amended, please give her a second chance.
Ajuju n'ese okwu😁🤣...
DeleteChizzy j
Taking her back all depends on the man for so Jesus preached it. Matt.5, Mark 10
DeleteThis is huge.
Delete@Tbabe
Deletewill you say same thing if a woman wrote in that her husband that abandoned her and the kids
to UK is begging to come back?😂😂😂😂😂
Is this BBN Ozo's brother, uncle Tony Umez say I should greet you and your duuurrling runaway wife.
ReplyDeletePoster if she want to come back to you as your wife but is not ready to do the needful since tradition is involved please forget about her and only allow her to have a video call with your daughter.
ReplyDeleteYou still love her and want her back but she is not ready to make amends after what she did. Except you want to die because of a woman, after all she left you because if man so why sacrificing yourself for a woman. Be alive for your children.
Let me also add that if you have a way, conduct paternity tests on the kids, who knows? Do not take her back and stop letting her contact you. If she had to eliminate you so that she could travel, I don't think she would have hesitated.
ReplyDeleteLeave that daughter of Jezebel alone. Like Stella said let her spend time with her daughter but ensure you keep your boundaries with her. Go and get a more juicier lady that understand what marriage is.
ReplyDeleteThank you oo. Poster don't accept her back
DeleteHmmmm some women sha I just dey think all the gbeshing styles wenndon happened with the other guy ,front door ,back door all doors .oga nor take her back if all the gbeshing nor keep the other guy she go still run go back.
DeleteBoth of you need to get out of religious and cultural bondage, nobody will die and nothing will happen except it’s their time, if she still loves you and you still love her then get back together
ReplyDeleteOga Bett move on with your life or else you want to die Young. What kind of woman will abandon her daughter and elope with another man? If you still love her and want her back, she must perform the traditional things. Same thing applies in my community in Abia State. Tradition is tradition
ReplyDeleteLet her see d daughter, you both should work out how to be in the kids lives.
ReplyDeleteYour wife no try sha. She fuck up.
oga 1st of all entice her and get back your son.. but on no acct should u get back with that woman na runz woman she go be.. also pls do a DNA testing on those kids to also confirm
ReplyDeleteMr Daniel is that you? The story is very true. She even closed her shop at abulegba.
ReplyDeletedon't take back a woman they have gbenshed tire in the UK
ReplyDeleteThis your case no be ordinary o, I hope you've not been jazzed , oga participate in the next SNM on SDK, maybe you go jam better girl, leave that your ex, she might kill you
ReplyDeleteWhat a shameless woman, if she is repentant why not do the sacrifice for cleansing, she knows you love her that is why she is refusing,
ReplyDeleteShe may even run off again, oga if she does not agree to the cleansing please avoid her like a plague, so you don't loose your life.
Id she has refused to do the traditional cleansing ,oga move on, but let her have access to her daughter
ReplyDeleteIf
ReplyDeleteMy mother told me a similar story (my MIL also told me something related). Do you know the common denominator in all these cases? The men died prematurely after taking the wives back. Just know that you have dug your grave if you ever take her back. Enough said.
ReplyDelete@Anon 15:51,thank you. thats always the case even in my place in south south, i fear for the man's life, if he down plays the tradition angle.
DeleteHmmm. This one is tough. Schedule a discussion with her and try to find out what happened. This is for your peace of mind
ReplyDeleteIt's quite possible the boy is not yours, it's also possible she wants to take the girl as well.
However, please don't punish your daughter for sins of her mother. Ask to see your son. Also allow your kids reunite with each other and give your son a chance to know you again.
Well,it is important you forgive her but you don't necessarily have to take her back.You probably might not be the biological father of the boy.
DeleteWhat beats my imagination in this story is...
ReplyDeleteWhy take the son and leave the daughter for you Poster?
As a woman, I believe we women are more endeared to our female children.
Oga, kindly carry out DNA on those children. Prepare your soft heart for the worst.
For me, oga please don't take that woman back. She is nothing but trouble for you.
Taking her back is at your peril.
My one cent.
UJU Frequency the woman left the daughter WITH HER OWN MOM and not for him.
DeleteYou are right about poster doing DNA test - ON BOTH CHILDREN. They might not be his and possibly from different men.
She just wants to take your daughter from you. The minute you get comfortable and lose guard, she’ll take the daughter abroad. The boy is most likely not yours, but for the UK guy so it was easier to settle down and prepare a place for your daughter. She will take her abroad if you let her back in. Be wise.
ReplyDeleteI don't think the boy is yours,be careful plss..
ReplyDeleteI think so, the boy is not his son. Poster is your son older than your daughter?
DeleteMy son is 3 while my daughter is 6
DeleteYou obviously still care about her. Forgive her,allow her to check on your daughter as you should your son.
ReplyDeleteI would advice you to move on because if you take her back,she'd still abscond.
Since traditions is involved, pls don't take her back unless she do the right thing that traditions demands
ReplyDeleteIn the first place, why did she feel that if she continued in the marriage, she would die? Where you hitting her? Or cheating on her? Or maybe a pastor' was talking to her? If we don't know why she felt leaving he home when you're not around was the only choice she had, we won't know what to advice.
ReplyDeleteAll you judgemental lots, men cheat everyday. They even go and impregnate and do all sorts out there. You will still advice the woman to take him back.
ReplyDeleteMr poster have you ever cheated on her,how did you treat that woman,what's her side of the story.
Am not saying your a bad person but there might be something your not saying pls
God bless you!
DeleteYou will hear them say,they will never leave their homes for a small girl so they must keep forgiving and enduring.
Some of them will even tell you how their husbands slept with their Sisters, yet they took him back.
Poster, the only twist turn I see here is the traditional issues.
In the end I will advice you follow your discretion.
Na dem. Association of Married Women Who Cheat
DeleteSeriously na them, they never disappoint, always supporting there own. Bad wives.
DeleteAs an Esan who is no doubt much more senior to you, l advice you to move on with your life. Even if she agrees to do the sacrifices stay away from her. You are not allowed to sleep under the same roof with her , not allowed to eat any food she cooks and collect water from her to drink or bath for the rest of your life. The fact her family knew what was going on and lied to you complicated everything. Believe me, she will leave again if you take her back. She may even kill you at some point.
ReplyDeleteLook this not about the gods of your land killing you, very far from it. It's mostly about the fact that your family, hers and neighbours especially those in Ekpoma and Uromi knows what happened. Those who knew what happened are likely to target you and your children with negative spirits under the guise that the gods of your land are attacking you. The danger is in those you have told, those your family members told especially people within your extended family. Young man be very careful. Again move on with your life make woman matter no go kill you and your children.
I lost a young friend 2 years ago. His wife cheated on him with her former boyfriend. The wife refused to do the necessary sacrifices and my young friend took her to Winners Chapel iguosa in Benin city where a pastor prayed for them and told them all is well against the advice of his mother and elders. He fell sick and died months after.
It is a lot easy to forgive and accept her back if your family and hers didn't know what happened. But in your case the whole village Don hear.
Lollll, complete balderdash, bunkum and perfumed hogwash.
DeleteSo when the man cheats and dips his shrivelled penis in every available hole and the woman is encouraged to take him back, what happens to the woman? Nothing abi.
Fuckin' RUBBISH.
Oga,this one na Yahoo wife aka " one chance wife" How are you even considering taking this olosho back assuming tradition isn't involved.a woman wey still follow man elope after 2kids no be human being.Abeg face front.if you can't find a good girl to remarry kindly contact me.i get plenty better girls for my area
ReplyDeletePlease forgive her and take her back, she was probably brain washed something like this happened to my mum, take her back
ReplyDeletePoster please you are from edo state and you know the tradition of your land.please don't take that woman back if she refuse to perform the traditional rite period..
ReplyDeleteDon't allowed any stupid love to blind you ooo.
Expect you want to join your ancenstors you can go ahead and take her back.
Bv Edo pikin
It's not only in Edo State.
DeleteIt happens in Anambra State (the towns within capital territory).
The man died sharp sharp! No wasting of time.
He ignorantly took the wife back in the city.
Another man, his wife did the traditional rites but on her own she relocated to Ireland afterwards. I guess she is sure she will run away again and decided to go AWOL.
Nothing concerns me with your tradition. How you people do christianity and still believe in all these things baffles me.
ReplyDeleteAs for taking her back, I do not advise you try It. People like that can't be trusted so you better let her go. How are you sure she won't run off again?
Let her see her daughter and both of you can coparent like civil adults.
Ms Abroadian the wife of the founding pastor of a mega church advised my former colleague to go back with her son to her pastor husband (abuse - DV plus cheating).
DeleteGuess what? Her husband strangled her while 8 months pregnant.
Do you know that my late colleague's father (also a pastor) advised her NOT TO GO BACK to her husband.
See, in CHRISTIANITY, you must not be foolish or presumptuous because that is not faith. You must learn to hear from God and how he leads you.
Christ says "forgive one person 7 times 70 offenses in a day" but he also said be "wise as serpents and innocent as doves" in the things of this life.
FORGIVENESS DOES NOT MEAN BEING FOOLISH.
Some days I regret opening some post on this blog. Please poster accept your wife back if that's what you feel like doing. Forgiveness goes both ways please just like men and women make mistakes. Most people shouting dont take her back are bitter females
ReplyDeleteDear Poster, please do NOT take her back as your wife, i repeat do NOT take her back as your wife. You can allow her have access to your daughter but be careful so she will not take her and run away, you have to supervise the visit. Please also do DNA on your kids especially the boy she took to UK, it's possible the boy is not your biological son that is why she took him and run away, please do DNA on both kids. I repeat again, do not take her back as your wife, if you do you are only risking your life, be wise.
ReplyDeleteDon't take her back o!
ReplyDeleteDo DNA on your two kids. If they are yours, arrange for joint custody.
But don't take her back.
Avoid her like a plague and move on with your life.
What if the son is not even his. To elope with another man, the relationship would have existed for a while. So, the boyfriend may have fathered the son, hence, they left the daughter behind. I believe she came back as the affair didn't work out. Pls move on
ReplyDeleteBut if the reverse was the case you guys would insult us for telling the woman not to take her husband back. Team “feminists are bad” team “it’s not easy to just tell someone to leave her marriage” suddenly see divorce as the best option
ReplyDeleteAlso not one of you asked “did you not see the signs before marriage” that you always bombard women with
That son is not your own! Make sure you do DNA on both kids. Don’t take her back, she will dump you again. A wife from a useless family can never be a good wife. Move on with your life and thank God for removing this demon! Right now your mind is full of emotions but you will look back and thank God!
ReplyDeleteOga japa but let her have access to her daughter .. #notime #egero
ReplyDeleteAll this silly tradition talks about a man died bla bla blah
ReplyDeleteAfrican magic don finish una.The men died naturally🚶🏼♀️🚶🏼♀️🚶🏼♀️🚶🏼♀️🚶🏼♀️
If you a proper Esan man, you would know that your wife avoiding traditional means of resolving the matter is a deeper danger for you.
ReplyDeleteYour wife can quickly refer to tradition as of the devil but she cannot refer to her adulterous life as of the devil.
Please don't take her back, that woman is evil and still have hidden agenda. Your life is very important, better play safe o and kindly go for another wife.Kill that love you have for her.
ReplyDeleteMy 2cents