Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Mrs Dee's Corner - Sending Off A New Bride.

Advertisement

Advertisement - Mobile In-Article

Friday, October 30, 2020

Mrs Dee's Corner - Sending Off A New Bride.

Nigeria is a country with diverse and rich cultural practices and it is always a delight to watch .....





From the new yam festival, Ofala festival and August meeting of the East, to the Durbar festival of the North, the Calabar Carnival of the South-South and the Osun Festival of the West.


The traditional marriage ceremonies by the different tribes of the nation are also full of splendour, tasty indigenous foods and beautiful cultural attires, but the icing on the cake for the Igbo traditional marriage is the 'Idu Ulo' that is a send off for the new bride and it is usually single handedly catered for by the mother of the bride.


It is an aspect where different items ranging from houses, cars, kitchen utensils, baby clothes and hangers, travel bags, hand bags, clothes and wrappers are bought by the mother of the bride and displayed in the full glare of the wedding guests.


The more expensive and numerous the gifts are, the more her worth and value increase in the sight of her in-laws.


Idu ulo is a bride's bragging rights and if one has a fall out with any of her in-laws , she can be insulted with the question 'nne gi o duru gi ulo?' meaning were you sent off with gifts by your mother? It is perceived that if a mother did not honour her daughter by sending her off with gifts and prayerful blessings, what is the grounds for her in-laws to accord her respect?


This practice has drastically waned with time, exposure and education. So much significance is not placed on 'what she is bringing' to her new home but it is now more on her qualities as a good wife and daughter-in-law to her husband's family.


My mum insisted on carrying out this cultural practice even when I made her know that it was not necessary and my in-laws did not care about such.

I ended up giving out some of the gifts like mortar and pestle, pots and plates because I did not need them.

I wonder if other tribes apart from the Igbos practice 'Idu Ulo' or something similar to it.

29 comments:

  1. I think it's a good part of our tradition, especially when the bride is given the things she actually needs

    ReplyDelete
  2. 'nne gi o duru gi ulo.πŸ˜‚
    This idu ulo thing is no longer common in this generation like it used to be jare which is better imo.

    ReplyDelete
  3. My mom did it when one of my sisters got married, when my other sister got married she only gave her few wrappers materials she can sew or use as wrappers. She didn't give pots or kitchen stuffs cos they were about leaving the country.
    I don't think it is of any significance to our inlaws cos they are not from ibo speaking tribes and they really don't care.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think i know about mothers giving their daughters beautiful wrappers.

      Delete
  4. Mrs. Dee, please try to be realistic with "our culture." People hardly do these things these days.
    Mothers who are civil servants are not paid. Traders do not see goods to trade on. How many "twitter generation girls"
    will receive "mortar and pestle and pots?" How many mothers can afford to buy "cars." Besides, when did cars become
    Igbo culture?
    In real cultural sense, it is not the quantity of what is given but the quality
    and good name of the family she comes from. So much premium is place on the girl's character and chastity.
    For instance, if the girl became pregnant before marriage, no one pays or accepts her bride price, you forgot
    that one. I am Igbo and I know these cultural norms very well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did you finish this post before you rushed to comment?

      Please read the 6th paragraph and assimilate before you decide to castigate. 🀷‍♀️

      Delete
    2. @13:56
      I read that paragraph "practice has waned with time, education etc." But did you read my entire comment before rushing to
      "castigate?" Read my second to last line. Did Mrs. Dee include that one?

      Delete
    3. Anon 12:51 my parents are what you’d class as “modern “ we were born and raised abroad YET when I was getting married at 22 four years ago she still bought the necessities. Did I bring it back with me to the UK ? No but it’s in my Inlaw’s home whenever I go back yearly it’s used.

      Delete
    4. Your comment is actually castigating and making it look like it's not a practice which is still upheld in modern times. Idu ulo, is a bragging right. Whether you admit it or not. Mothers/families give depending on their capabilities, if you can afford a house, good. If it's kitchen utensils, good too.
      Someone is sounding like she's trying to justify why she didn't get hers

      Delete
    5. @16;34
      That's your opinion, respected. Mine is mine and no apologies.

      Delete
  5. It's a must in Ohafia culture in Abia State, and there's no religion discrepancies about it. It's an honor given to the bride by her family, all kinds of house hold utensils and equipments are bought.

    ReplyDelete
  6. If I have a daughter, I'd like to send her off in a big way tho'.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Most families in Igbo land are not doing it.

    The most Complex B

    ReplyDelete
  8. The food stuffs i was given lasted a year.

    ReplyDelete
  9. My mum did it for my sister o, I know say if she get money she will even do more for me

    ReplyDelete
  10. After my wedding in Owerri last year my family gave me a 6 burner gas cooker, a gas cylinder, mortar with pestle, one giant water tank, electric sewing machine, food processor, a bed , a baby cot, pots, pans, a big chest for wrappers, a generator, a deep freezer and a television set. They called me in with my in laws to present them and I cried when my mom was apologising to me that there was no car attached to it as she and my late father had dreamed. Truly I was in tears coz she bought it in conjunction with all my siblings. They contributed money for it even when I told them I didnt want them. They said my Dad wont be happy if I didnt get any thing. I was moved coz theybdont eben take heaven and earth as bride price. God bless them for me .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwwwww, so sweeeeeeeeeet. God her aplenty,and your siblings too. May God also bless your new home/family.
      You will be a good Ambassador of your family.
      Kaα»‹!
      So sweet.

      Delete
  11. In Imo State the practise is important o. It is the dowry of the woman after the man pays bride price. It helps a couple to start off sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  12. In my place, we don't joke with this oh. My mum even got me a car after buying numerous things that were brought by a 911 vehicle, in fact my idu was the talk of the town last year during my wedding.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

      Delete
    2. QueenAmy so happy seeing you. May God continue to bless you and uplift you in your health and every area of your life, Amen. God is indeed wonderful.

      Delete
  13. I'm Yoruba it's it's in our culture to do eru Ile oko for our daughters. I bought for my daughter. I received cultural shock when my Yoruba wives came with nothing. But my Ibo in-laws bought a lot for their daughter.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Really? This is the first time I am hearing this. I will ask my my yoruba friends.

      Delete
  14. I am married to an Igbo and I will love to do it for my daughter.

    ReplyDelete
  15. So what happens when the bride’s mother isn’t alive, who takes up that responsibility?

    ReplyDelete
  16. in Akwa/Cross, we do it too!! 13 years ago, my sister and i got married in the same year, my parents did for us both even when i said i didnt want. it was nice and pleasant. we even got a King size bed lol along with more traditional things like mortar and pestle... when my sister in kaw got married 6 years later, she just wanted a deep freezer and washing machine and i was in charge courtesy of being eldest brother's wife and we git it for her. she did not want anything traditional but her mama insisted and still got a few...lol..

    ReplyDelete

Disclaimer: Comments And Opinions On Any Part Of This Website Are Opinions Of The Blog Commenters Or Anonymous Persons And They Do Not Represent The Opinion Of StellaDimokoKorkus.com

Pictures and culled stories posted on this site are given credit and if a story is yours but credited to the wrong source,Please contact Stelladimokokorkus.com and corrections will be made..

If you have a complaint or a story,Please Contact StellaDimokoKorkus.com Via

Sdimokokorkus@gmail.com
Mobile Phone +4915210724141