Hmmmm...
BABY DADDY THREAT
Good Afternoon family, please i need help/advice.
Good Afternoon family, please i need help/advice.
I have a baby for a guy who didn't marry me, he married someone else. he sends money when he wants and its barely enough for my baby, i don't have a steady job yet because i am still nursing my baby who is already a year old.
This guy is saying he wants to collect my child from me with the excuse that he is rich and wont allow the boy to suffer or manage life according to him.
My baby is just one year, i cant afford to be separated from him, his wife might maltreat my son, if i give him up now, i might never get to see him.
This man says he will fight me for the custody Of my boy, I don't know what to do, I am confused and tired right now.
A Rich baby daddy trying to take a one year child away from the Mother? You would need the Grace of God to fight this....
A Rich baby daddy trying to take a one year child away from the Mother? You would need the Grace of God to fight this....
Why dont you relocate to somewhere that he cannot trace you?
The Law in Nigeria does not help the poor. I know someone whose ex abducted the kids and its been 5 years and she has not seen them...She is not allowed to and the Lawyer has not been able to do anything because the man can pull strings with his money.
There was a time a BV contacted me and told me that she had to agree to start sleeping with her ex husband so that she could be granted access to see the kids. He was angry that she had divorced him and as revenge denied her access to her kids for 2years and when she penetrated his Berlin wall, he told her his conditions and she agreed out of frustration so that she could be part of her Children's lives.....She did not get back to me so i dont know how the matter is now...
Just pack your things and move somewhere you would be untraceable until you can get your act together..
Run away with your child and change your number. Simple.
ReplyDeleteSingle motherhood is not nearly as easy as some feminists paint it. Even if your ex isn't threatening you, what of the financial aspect? The psychological aspect nko? How about protection and stable foundation a child needs to develop into a wholesome adult?
DeleteSingle motherhood is a very selfish thing that sadly has been made a norm in this generation and it is terribly ugly. Please do whatever it is within your power to not be added to this ugly statistics.
My dear poster. Go to the nearest ministry of women affairs and social welfare and report him first. They won't let him take your child n he will be mandated to pay upkeep for the child. Fight him first and you will see him free you. Make sure you explain to the social worker that you cannot part with your child and he's threatened to take him away that they should help you.
DeleteRun with your boy..Else you will NEVER See him again.
ReplyDeletewait...o,was he married before you got pregnant for him?
Just pack up and move. He is serious about collecting the baby.
DeleteAnd why does that matter @Bbjac? When u know how deceitful some men can be about their marital status
DeleteRelocate,change your phone number if possible? and also report him to child welfare.
ReplyDeleteBeing a single mum ain't easy but if you have to hawk to feed your child do it.
It is well. Only one thing I know is prayers work.
ReplyDeleteLike Stella said move to new place or state and follow it up with prayers.
Foolish man
SUCH A CRUEL AND SELF SERVING MAN
ReplyDeleteI PRAY THAT GOD COMES THROUGH FOR YOU COS I CAN IMAGINE HOW YOU FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW
Na wa, why are some men like this sef? What stops him from taking care of his child by sending them money . Monthly, must he try to take a baby from the mother, coz she's not Financially bouyant? Best you relocate , if you want to be in your baby's life, coz once he takes the baby, you're out of the the picture.
ReplyDeleteDear...Stella has said it all! In fact she nailled it on the head! For say na western countries now you will have a better chance but definitely not in this COUNTRY called Nigeria where money is EVERYTHING! Suppose say you have money now or you have connections at the TOP my advice would have been different but you no get MONEY, you no know PEOPLE...forget it. Run with your baby as fast as your leg can carry you and forget about the dime you are collecting from your so called IDIOTIC baby daddy forge ahead and moveeee on. What if the baby daddy died won't you live and take care of your child? I pray God HELP you and provide you with a good job 🙏. You can stay and not run away if you are OKAY not being in your child life sha...some parents will say when the child grow up he/she go find him mama or papa come, guess WHAT? na lie! Nobody will find you come anywhere! So pls do the needful and act fast! Ire ooo 🚶
ReplyDeleteShe’s contemplating giving up the boy Sef some of you women na apology. He may be your only child in life tomorrow
DeleteNext time, close your legs when you see a married man. Many of them can’t leave their wives for you. Run away with your child or you wait to see what step he takes. No sane judge should take away custody of a little child from her mother.
ReplyDeleteHe was never married man whme they were dating or having sex. He impregnated her and married someone else.
DeleteHow is that even possible when he didn't pay your bride price? See you had better show him you're indabosky, since you don't have anything tangible doing find somewhere to relocate to and get a good job so you can sustain you both, it's because you're looking up to crumbs from his table that's why he feels he can do you anything and get away with it...
ReplyDeleteTry and make friends with solder guy, navy, police & scdc... E get why!
That your last line, e get why ooo. By the time they threaten him twice, he go maintain.
DeleteIt is well.
ReplyDeleteSeriously we need to get somethings straight in this country.
How does that fool tend to take care of that young folk at that age knowing fully well that his wife will not give that baby proper care.
Why not just show sign of responsibility and cultured manner by sending his baby mama enough money to take care of the baby if truly he loves the baby that much.
Madam, the best way is to leave that area and just find somewhere to go jare cuz if I ask to sue him now, the end result go bad gan oooo
We men can be so stupid at times
Narcs are mean, hard and cruel
DeleteBeauty, handsomeness does not change their hearts
Neither does wealth
I'm sorry that this is where you have found yourself.
ReplyDeleteYou necessarily don't have to run to anywhere. Stand your ground, be bold and refuse to give up your child. You already sound like you're the type that's easy to intimidate; better shine your eyes and hold your child. What about your family? Go to them.
Also, you really need to settle down and reevaluate your life. Jesus said "come the way you are". Go to Jesus the way you are, confess him as your Lord and Savior, fix your relationship with him and ask him to help you get through this situation. he'll surely direct your path. Al the best!
Why are some humans wicked? Maybe you should report to any ministry of women and child support so that they can help you
ReplyDeleteThis is serious ooo, madam, just carefully and wisely, because this one you don't have stable work. Can't you beg him to set up business for you. Or get his family involved and yours too. Get someone he listen to. Don't give up. He may be a better father it the boy is around him sha.
ReplyDeleteTo him she was a womb not a person so can be dispensed with
DeleteHe will surely be a "kind" father
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Hmmm why can't men just understand and live without all these wahala.
ReplyDeletePoster it is well with you.
Stella, your advise would have been perfect if the poster is working but she's not.
ReplyDeletePoster, do you have family members? Do you also know where your baby daddy's family members he respects resides? If yes, contact your family elders to call his family for a sit down meeting. Let them agree on how you both can have equal custody. I can't tell you to fight the man in court because he's richer than you for now. This is not something you should do with force. You must stoop to conquer. The elders should massage his ego but make sure they convince him into paying child support and sharing custody.
Do you have your own living space or you are staying with your parents/siblings. Do you have a personal room in your parents/siblings' house. If the answer is yes, go look for a job . Wealth doesn't determine everything, It is just for you to prove you have a conducive environment and the money to raise your child. Your character have a role to play. Custody cases favours women in Nigeria. If at the end he gets custody, you will have visitation rights, your child will be able to spend some weekends and school holidays with you. But I doubt he will be given the custody of a one year old child . Don't allow him intimidate you. Again go look for a job, it's silly to depend on him exclusively to care for your child.
ReplyDeleteYou are right Alex. No judge will grant custody of a one year old child to the father unless it is proven that the mother is unfit to raise the child. If he sues for custody, get a good lawyer to defend you and counter sue for custody and child maintenance. You have a better chance now that the child is still an infant. Moreover, the man never married you so his getting custody won't be that easy.
DeleteHis suing you might work to your favour, just get a good lawyer but if you can't afford a lawyer, abeg japa oh! Take off with your child and change your number.
So sorry for your dilemma,but like Stella said, it's best to relocate. People like this can be very wicked cos money makes them feel power drunk
ReplyDeleteMay God come through for you dear.. This is such a pathetic situation
ReplyDeleteRun to where and with what. Please there are any NGOs and individuals that can help her.
ReplyDeleteJust relocate,but someone who did not pay your bride price cannot take your child away from you now.Which tribe are you from that allows this because in Igbo land,it can never happen.
ReplyDeleteRun run run, hide, disappear...leave social media and change number.
ReplyDeleteDear poster, plead with him and make him see reasons why the child has to be with you till he gets to at least 10years or older after which he can have the child. Just play the victim card and do his bidding just so you have your child around till he/she is old enough to décidé. Don’t fight him o. Of which, why can’t the wife birth him child Ethan he is so bent on yours!!!
ReplyDeleteTo plead with a person that didn't even pay any bride price and also do all his biding? I don't get it, well that's is what poverty caused. Poster if your parents are still alive and capable, just take the child to them and go find your life back and make sure you are sending them money every month for the upkeep for them and your child until when u stand on your feet again to be able to fight that monster after you might have collected the child from your parents
DeleteHe did not marry her. She should not beg him. Beg him for what? For getting her pregnant and marrying another woman?
DeletePoster, you sound soft sha, that's why he has mouth to make that threat to a woman he did not pay bride price for.
The law doesn't work here,please poster relocate and change your phone number and also keep away from social media.May GOD send helpers your way,you will be fine
ReplyDeleteSome men are just plain wicked. poster I pray that God come through for you.
ReplyDeleteIf you run, pray he doesn't trace ur whereabouts from ur bank withdrawals....if he's rich, he can also pull strings for that.
ReplyDeleteReport to child welfare and women's right activist. No need to run because if you're found, they'll still take you to court and claim you tried to kidnap the child for financial benefits. All you need now is to prove you can actively care for your child even, you don't have to be a millionaire to do so. Also prove that your baby daddy doesn't stand up to his responsibilities by keeping a record of amount paid to you. Never accept cash, if you do make sure it's always in the presence of a legitimate witness or videoed.
ReplyDeleteReport to the right authority and others, if nothing, relocate.
ReplyDeleteRunway with your child where he cannot trace you.or take the child to your parent.else you won't be able to see your son again for a longgggggg time
ReplyDeleteDo everything in your power not to give him your son please, no one can take proper care of your child then you will do.
ReplyDeleteIf you need to run please do that
Report to National human rights Commission in your state
ReplyDeletePoster pls what tribe are you?cos in Igbo land,even if you don't work and as long as he didn't pay your brideprice, my dear he has no single damage right to come for your child.
ReplyDeleteGo and find out ist if he can take your baby away,what nonsense.
If its in Ignoland, this is not a chronicle because culturally a man cannot lay claim to a child he didnt pay the mother's bride price. It's left for the family to allow you take rye child or not. The boy is not your son,he belongs to the girl's family so long as no.bride prune e was paid before the child was born.
ReplyDeleteBut in this instance, her best bet is to change location until further notice
Poster, as said above, involve your family and the man's family. Let your
ReplyDeletefamily look for a member who is good at resolving matters like this to lead.
If that fails, involve the Ministry in charge of women, children and welfare. Go to your LGA Secretariat to find out. They have very experienced women and lawyers who can help.
Ask for help from the nearest Nigeria Bar Association branch or FIDA branch. You may get free legal services. Most FIDA Members include big men wives.
Don't be combative unless in defence (some women Bvs will not support this). But e get why.
Demand from him in accordance with your child's needs with possible proof not in accordance with his capacity to provide.
Don't be afraid. The law favours women with very young children. The judicial system is not as corrupt as painted.
Please forget custom in this matter.
A child belongs to both parents, whether married or not.
Please go to fider, if you are in Rivers state. female lawyers will deal with him
ReplyDelete