Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Nigerian Pastor Narrates How She Conquered The Hatred Her Mother In Law Had for Her...

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Saturday, November 06, 2021

Nigerian Pastor Narrates How She Conquered The Hatred Her Mother In Law Had for Her...

Pastor Mildred Kingsley-Okonkwo told her church members a story that will Interest those with the same kind of Mother in law....





 



In a video posted, she revealed that her mother-in-law didn’t like her, not because she is a bad person, but because they are too alike. According to her, opposite people do attract, so because of that, she felt that they were repelling each other.



 She (her mother-in-law) would visit and be looking for who to gist with her. "I don’t even have the power, so my “Good morning ma”, “Will you eat now ma” is the best I can do," she said. At that time she didn’t have children so she didn’t have the option of sending her grandchildren to go and disturb her but now when she visits she would send her grandchildren to her and she has done her job, they have gisted through the children.


She revealed that from the first day she met her mother-in-law, they had a problem and she blamed her husband for that. She went to visit pastor Kingsley and didn't know that his mother was around. When she knew, she greeted her and didn't know why Pastor Kingsley wanted her to meet his mother because he hadn't proposed to her at that time. Pastor Kingsley introduced her as a particular Isioma that he has been talking about and she was surprised. 


She said that they sat in the parlour and were watching a movie together. At 8pm, she wanted to go home but he told her to wait a little longer. His mother then came out of the room and asked her why she was still around at that late hour. “Is your mother not at home?” the mother-in-law asked her. “Yes ma, No ma” she didn’t know which one to say. So she tapped Pastor Kingsley to drive her home.


Pastor Mildred however revealed that that was where things went south between her and her mother-in-law. The woman was just not strict but there was no warmth, no nothing. If I greet her she will answer me, she was civil and all that but no warmth at all and I am coming from a family where my Mum is a hugger, she will squeeze you to death with love, she is asking everything, she wants you to gist with her, to come and sit on her lap.


She then started acting strange to her mother-in-law. Though she cared for her, she acted as if she do not care. She told her church members not to see her as someone bad because it is the word of God that is helping everyone.


 She kept acting strange to her until the Holy Spirit spoke to her. She said that the Holy Spirit told her to go and read the book of Ruth and understand how Ruth treated her mother-in-law. It was then she felt sorry and understood the actions of Ruth comparing it to her own life.


In conclusion, she said that she listened to the Holy Spirit and accepted. So she started working on loving this woman. "Today, she is my best friend, we are very good friends because of obedience," she said. The solution is in the Word, if I didn’t see that scripture don’t you think I will do things the way the world does it. She gives me fire, I give her fire. She gives me insult, I will silently disrespect her because I wouldn't want to insult her.




*If you are having problems with your Mother in law, please go and read the book of Ruth in the Bible....

79 comments:

  1. God's masterpiece6 November 2021 at 13:56

    Hmmmm...it is well.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Only God, can help my own.
    I have been over nice to her but she told so many lies against me. Whenever she and her Son have issues, she will tell her kids l instigated it. Most times, l wasn’t even home when they the issue happened. I have forgiven her. She wore a letter of apology to me and expected me to write her back. I just wanted her to tell her children the truth of what transpired in my home. But she still hasn’t. I have left her to God. He saw and knows all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please if you are living in a family house, kindly move out. She might not be a bad person but just tired and frustrated of sharing her space.

      Delete
    2. A whole mother kn law sent an apology letter to you but it is not enough even though it is written and everyone can see it. You still want her to bring all the village people to apologise abi? Some of you are not well trained from home.

      Delete
    3. Sha read the book of RuthπŸ˜‚

      Delete
    4. Anon 14:27, this is not about being well trained but being vindicated amongst other family members who have judged this daughter in law unfairly on account of all the mither in law has told them in times past.
      I too will want that!! So people (at the very least her children) will know I'm not the bad person she portrayed me to be.

      Delete
    5. Dainty πŸ‘πŸΌπŸ‘πŸΌπŸ‘πŸΌ

      Delete
    6. @1427. She sent the letter only to me.
      None of her kids know about it.
      She made them hate me but refused to tell them she lied. They still don’t know the truth but l don’t care because God knows the truth.

      Delete
    7. If you were the person, you would have left the marriage. This, has nothing to do with training.
      In fact, my training, let me survive. Hopefully, you have never been wrongfully accused. Wait till it happens to you.

      Delete
    8. @14:21.
      "A whole mother inlaw?" What is "unwhole" about the daughter inlaw? Mother inlaw that lies...is that one worthy to be called whole...just because she nore a son she shoild not be held accountable fir her actions or inactions? Next thimg you said the Anon does not have home training...really? This is the kind of thinking that gives these women entitled mentality. Whole ko, wholeless ni.

      Delete
    9. 14:37 you must be daft.
      When she was instigating the world against her daughter in law and living against her, did she do it via mail?
      I said did she do it vis via mail?
      A 'whole mother in law' indeed. A whole mother in law that cannot treat her daughter in law with respect and cordially and not lie against her.
      Shior kelebe.

      Delete
    10. Please be VERY careful with people who offend you openly but want to tender private apologies

      Delete
  3. Will the book of Ruth sort it all???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My MIL carries the Bible on her head and is a born again to everyone but secretly is spoiling my marriage with her son simply because she doesn't get along with him. If I start writing what she's done eh... So, it's not always about reading the book of Ruth.

      Delete
  4. Thank God for the word of God which is a lamp to light our path on earth.
    I’m so intentional about loving my MIL. Thank God for his grace. She has a very refreshing sense of humor thoughπŸ˜…. We are each other’s meme plug on WhatsApp. My SIL told me she saw her watching something on her phone the other day and laughing so hard that she had to ask what was so funny and she replied her “choco” sent her a funny video.
    I laughed so hard especially as choco had a different meaning during our time in sec. Sch

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do men put this much effort into getting along with the in-laws?

      Men shield your wives biko

      Delete
    2. @jet li, thank you. They hardly make effort. I honestly don’t have energy for all that familiarity. Saying hi once in a while is more than enough. Being too close with my husband’s family fu*ked me up big time. Not doing all that ridiculousness again. Nope. I’m Setting boundaries

      Delete
    3. Anon 17:52 are you me? I have resolved to just be respectful and civil. I am not eager to please again.
      I learnt my lessons the hard way, now it is do what is right by them, but never go overboard like before.

      Delete
  5. Why do Nigerian women have to die to be accepted
    If you dont like me thats your headache, I dont have time for nonsense abeg

    ReplyDelete
  6. Once dated a guy whose mother was verbally abusive to me. When I think back I'm happy I didn't marry into that family cos my own family we never abuse each other. But for these people verbal abuse and cursing was their normal. At least in Mildred case she was getting civility, just lack of warmth. Me I didn't even see civil, I saw abuse.

    Btw, I love Pastor Mildred, God bless you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They will tell you its normal.
      Thst abuse is normal.
      Thst shouting when angry is normal.
      That you are forming.
      They dont know that were brought up as jungle animals.

      Delete
  7. Nice one.O ye stubborn women , please learn from this interesting piece.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I have the closest relationship possible with my mother in law. There's no gist from their side of the family she doesn't gist me. She accords me the greatest respect I deserve as a person and as the wife of her son. But this is also because I have been the best daughter in law possible to her. We gist as friends. I talk to her more than I talk to my own mum sef. When my husband and I were still dating, she told me one day that she would love a mother, daughter relationship between us and as long as her son loves me, she would also forever love me as a daughter.

    Achieving a great MIL- DIL relationship is neither hard nor impossible if both are good people with common sense.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Watch as “Anons” come to bark and foam at their mouths at your comment, Eka. E no Dey hard them.

      Delete
    2. Both are good people with common sense √

      Delete
    3. @snarker, stop instigating. Even if you're expecting an anon to rubbish her claim, you don't have to laud it over her.
      Appreciate her story without that tint of pessimism.

      Delete
    4. You are lucky @eka. She was willing to accept her son had someone else in his heart and to equally love that person. This is also how I love those who are loved by male relatives.

      My ML is unlovable. She was never and still not willing to share her sons. However, the first son refused to let her claws remain. He focused on his family. You can still hear her complaining that he tells her his family keeps him busy etc. Lol, I call occasionally but I have stepped away from being too involved. She can have all of him 😁

      Delete
    5. 17:28 loll she didnt even acknowledge Eka's comment, just went in to say her own mind but used 'anons' to cover it up. Buahahahahahahaaaa we sabi their type.

      Delete
  9. Me and MIL are in a good place and we respect each other wella. Gone were the days she tried to break us up cos hubby was her only child and small husband. She used to slap me at the slightest opportunity, but one day i slapped her back really hard and pounded her really good. Its bn 10years now and i still dont know why she didnt tell her son. She respects me now and i give her her due respect. She stopped cooking and eats whatever i give her, stopped entering and lying on my matrimonal bed, when she needs anything, she asks. SOMETIMES ALL ONE HAS TO DO IS FIGHT BACK

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    2. Eewooooo, fight back ke? For anyone reading this, please don't fight back oo. If she had told your husband, it could have spiralled out of control. I'd rather completely blank that kind of person than slap back. For someone old enough to be my mother? I fitn't can't.

      Delete
    3. This didn’t have to be as funny as it read. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Delete
    4. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    5. I can't even blame you. She got back the hand she gave u. How dare u slap someone sef?

      Delete
    6. Good idea. Na knock my own dey knock me or give me abara for back. Sometimes she go push me. I go bruce lee her next.

      Delete
    7. I cannot fight nor slap my mother in law even though she is horrible but she has used her wickedness for me to scatter her home, I didn't know I was the reason for the eyeservice love she shew my mates(brother in law's wives) immediately I stopped coming closer they all started complaining her to their hubby,to the extent her mother died non of my sister wives came to be with her during the burial, despite her coming back from the US and gifting them things and not giving me because she said "I don't have anything Iam doing with money,so I can buy stuff for myself and it's only me and hubby(insult I chop bc of TTC) but others needs help because they have children"

      Delete
    8. 🀣🀣🀣🀣 Lawd have mercy πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Delete
    9. Pounded her really good🀣🀣🀣🀣
      I dunno why anonymous ang came to mind, as per she being the MIL 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    10. We are 4 sisters and all happily married except our eldest sis all thanks to her MIL. All her DILs dread her like death. Anyway, last year september, she caused serious issues for my sister and well drove to her house and beat both her MIL and one of her evil haggard daughters. It was a free for all fight. The whole street intervened and they were forced to move out same day. Our sis has had uncountable miscarriages cos of these witches....fear no let the husband talk cos his siblings and spouses were all in support. She gave birth to a sweet boy on Aug 3 this year. Chai

      Delete
    11. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ this is funny but not funny. I guess she didn't report because she knew she had been the petty one all along and doesn't even know what to tell the son you did wrong. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ never heard of this and won't take this route but seems your fighting back opened mama's eyes to her fault

      Delete
    12. Abeg if you have a MIL that is troublesome or wicked, hitting her is a No No. Look for other means to deal with her.

      Delete
  10. Mine, lies like the Devil, I,ve realized it wasn't really about me, the other wife married to her ist son , she has so quarrelled with that one, she almost left her home. It doesn't matter how much love you show her, she,d smile in front of you and continue to lie to her sons, no single fear of God, I only feel pity for her, divide and rule is her second name , I hope she finds peace some day, even her son,s are ashamed of her endless lies. She,d lie you didn't give her food , you,ll buy a dress for her, she,ll hide it and tell her son you,ve never gotten anything for her and still tell her son not to ask you... The pettyness is embarrassing....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster, are you sure your mother in law is not my elder sister? This description here is my eldest sister. She can set a country on fire and sit down calmly to watch everybody burn🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣.

      Delete
    2. WHAT????? This is unbelievable! I never met my mother in law she died before I was married in to the family. But my father in law is wonderful he calls on the phone to pray for me every week. When I visited him for the first time he came to the window to sing for me. Such a sweet man he is 88yrs old but if you see him so looking young. I love my father in-law never gave me trouble for one day.

      Delete
    3. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    4. Poster,are your mother in law mine?
      The only difference is she won't lie of food,she doesn't stay in the country and can afford it whenever she is around but I tell you the damage she caused before leaving just made her family look like a war zone, nobody communicates with each other!
      The worst thing that can happen to any family is to have a foolish woman as a mother on top of being foolish she come add wickedness.. Chaiiiii

      Delete
    5. Poster are you my SIL?
      If you are in Texas, know that I saw this and my advise is to ignore her.
      Enjoy your life

      Delete
    6. You just described mine.
      The lies shock me.
      No fear of God.
      All her Daughters, except her eldest daughter took sides with her. Na Sidon look l de
      If you have a good MIL, hold her tight. Love and cherish her. I will try to send Stella my story so people can read and learn.

      Delete
  11. I don't really know why a believer in Christ will be taught to love? Who teaches the baby fish to swim?

    These things are written in black and white in multiple places in the Scripture;

    Romans 12:17Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” d says the Lord. 20On the contrary:

    “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;

    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.

    In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” e

    21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's written in black and white yes, but no one can read/meditate on the word in one day. Spiritual growth takes time and daily renewal of the mind. So, yes a believer in Christ needs to be taught the ways of Christ. It cannot happen in a flash.
      Dunce!

      Delete
    2. Oops! Did I just call you a dunce?
      The sweet Holy Spirit has reprimanded me. I apologize.
      Seeeeee, walking in love is a continuous process 😜

      Delete
    3. LOL 16:30:/16:32 The lesson in your comments is clear just as it is wise. 😊

      Delete
    4. @16:30
      There are things expected of one that is a "pastor"
      How do you shepherd people in hatred; I mean with hatred ruling in your life.
      The Scripture says that those that preach will be judged more strictly James 3:1

      Delete
    5. Anon 16:32, no kill meeeeeee🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    6. 🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

      Delete
    7. @15:30 I used to be like you before. Just pray that that don't meet some devils..you give them food, they take it to juju man and jazz your life. Then you spend long days praying and fasting to undo the jazz.

      Abeg, as you are doing good there are some people you need to let burn in the fire they set for themselves. If you carry water and quench the fire, they would become monsters than set you on fire so you can just look like them.

      The same bible says that if you can't stay in peace, avoid each other lest you consume one another (Gal. 5:15)
      The same bible says the spirit of the last days must be avoided (2nd Tim. 3:1-5). There are many scriptures that ask us to avoid and limit communication with evil and treacherous people. Stop shoving these one-sided doctrines down people's throat.

      Thanks

      Delete
  12. I love her teaching with her husband. Everything is not fighting oh na wisdom.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I have given up on mine,if you like read the whole bible to walk with her and you don't send money every week,you are wasting your time.
    Correct money ooo else her daughter's will say na that one w fit send.
    They say I should use my salary to tend to the home while the son should focus on her.ok.
    My second will send provision and money,mil will never to say thank u.
    Same with me,I have rest on her case.

    ReplyDelete
  14. One time, my hubby slapped me twice, and pushed me hard on to the floor...
    Everyone, his siblings and my father in law begged me to accept my husband's apology, move back in with him. So mother inlaw won't know when she comes back from omugwo in another state...
    Didn't understand why they were all concerned about her getting wind of it.
    Until she got to know through one of her grandchildren....
    She asked me to confirm...
    Haaa! My husband saw hell that day, I pitied him ...

    There's nothing she didn't tell him...

    I never knew that in mother in law's books, hitting one's wife is as good as committing murder.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good! A mother that doesn't support her son's nasty behavior blindly. I hope he has changed his ways.

      Delete
    2. Awwwww. Such a sweet mother...

      Delete
    3. So she didn't ask what you did which is always the routine question.

      Delete
  15. I hope to develop a good mother in law relationship. But if my MIL gives me pepper I go show am fire for fire. Na husband I marry I no marry family. My boyfriend told me her younger sis is getting married that he wants me to attend the function. I said No bcus I don't want to have anything to do with in laws besides I can't go and be washing plate and be behaving like 6yards house wife materials when my boyfriend has not propose.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kiaaa i just remembered my Ex with this story. Attended his sisters sons bday with him;a party there was caterer and servers. What am i to do again??? If not to seat as guest.
      Mind u we were newly dating,like 3mths. This ppl complain im not wife material bcos i didnt help them at the party.
      The sister also complained i never use to come and visit her. Anyway they married one "wife material" for him and the marriage packed up not long after. Do u know the foolish woman saw my friend smwhere sometime back and was asking her if im now married, they want me back with their brother. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
      My friend said ahhhh,Yes with child sef. No way there; foolish ppl.

      Delete
  16. There are some very nice MILs and there are some wicked ones. They are just like that because naturally, they are not nice. Some people take pleasure in knocking people’s heads together. Some people don’t like a peaceful environment because they are used to the infighting, etc When you take a woman, who quarrels with half her street to your house in London, so you expect her to live in peace and harmony with you?? A wicked person will remain wicked. A troublemaker will remain a troublesome person.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ever since I know there are bad parents, I will suggest that anybody that wants to get married should also check the parent's behaviors. it may affect the children also, and you can imagine such a family.
    I never knew that someone can be old and still bad as a parent.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Some parents are very bad na and it rubs off on everyone

      Delete
  18. I don't have mother in law ,it pains me cos people tell me how good she was, I only saw her in the dream and she showed a mark on her back that my hubby used to play with when he was young. So he will agree that I saw her. But my sisters in law , story for another day , I love my privacy so much but tried to be very friendly with them but my crime I married their brother, they expected him to work and mature at least take care of their children before he marries but hubby said no that he wants to marry so they faced me that it's cos of me. I don hear am for their hands but my GOD FAITHFUL TO ME

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear I am in the same boat with you, my husband family are ten in number, and he is the number eight child, the family wanted him to trained their children for them before he married, my mother in-law show me no be small, after my weeding she packed all my gift from my weeding, I just pick few things, she still demanding that when I am traveling out of the country I should return the once I picked, I told her no problem, when I was about to leave I packed everything to my mother house, the women almost died because of my property. For my own peace of mine I was never engage into any argument with her till I left, even when she talked about me in hausa language unknow her I speak hausa more than her, still yet I did not reply, one day she said among all her daughter's in-law that is heard to read my mine, why because I use silent treatment on her. The matter plenty

      Delete
  19. My dear I am in the same boat with you, my husband family are ten in number, and he is the number eight child, the family wanted him to trained their children for them before he married, my mother in-law show me no be small, after my weeding she packed all my gift from my weeding, I just pick few things, she still demanding that when I am traveling out of the country I should return the once I picked, I told her no problem, when I was about to leave I packed everything to my mother house, the women almost died because of my property. For my own peace of mine I was never engage into any argument with her till I left, even when she talked about me in hausa language unknow her I speak hausa more than her, still yet I did not reply, one day she said among all her daughter's in-law that is heard to read my mine, why because I use silent treatment on her. The matter plenty

    ReplyDelete
  20. She is very lucky. My Mother-in-law body shamed me severally. I got to know through the person she told that she allowed her son marry me because of my money and properties, with the aid of Jazz which fell off my eyes this year. Just tired to write chronicles, I would have sent in mine. I'm still recovering from post traumatic stress disorder. Getting married unknowingly to a diabolical family is the worst think that can happen to anyone be it male or female. When my eyes cleared, I heard lot of stories about how he uses jazz on women as long as you have money, with the connivance of his parents. They are aware of his domestic violence attributes too and will bribe the police if you report. Story plenty. So reading the book of Ruth doesn't help in all situations. Pardon my rant. Hoping for a complete healing from this trauma.

    ReplyDelete

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