Doctor Freaks Journal - "He That Is Without Sin Among You, Let Him First Cast The Stone"

There is a video that is currently trending on social media. It is the video of a father who was seen hitting the son and "mutilating" the dreadlocks on his head.

In this piece, I promise not to either take sides or sound judgmental. I would rather share my own experience with you, my reader. I was in JSS 3 at the time and just days before the end of the term I was fortunate enough to have found a classmate who was magnanimous enough to give me a haircut with "a comb and blade" (an improvised hair clipper as this was before the advent/proliferation of electric clippers.) With my new haircut ("All-back" it was called then) and "not-too-good" result, I marched home majestically.

At this point my dad was almost giving up on me in terms of academics because I rarely came back home with an impressive result but he still cared about my welfare and looks. Day 1 was fine. Probably he was in a good mood or was too busy to take note of my haircut. Day 2, I wasn't so lucky. He called me into the living room and pretended as if he was admiring my new haircut. "Baba Agric" directed me to "approach the Bench" for a better appreciation of my latest haircut. 

The clown, that I was quickly approached his seat and before I could say Jack Robinson, some "correct" slaps and knocks had landed on my face and head respectively. After the rain of slaps and knocks came the rude shock, he had a pair of scissors tucked right under the newspapers on the table. He massacred my most treasured "All-back" or "Brother Johnson" and further subjected me to a stiffer punishment. 

Meanwhile, some men of God in Nigeria have had their heads adorned with this particular style for years now "oh." Do you blame them? When they were not raised by "Baba Agric nko?"
I think four years after, I opted for "Skin cut" for life, no thanks to early balding too.

Back to the story of the young man and the father . 

Over the years, I've come to terms with some harsh realities and I would gladly share same with my reader. Morality is good. In any event, certain conducts which constitute morality could be uni-directional and not universal. Uni-directional in the sense that they are peculiar to a group of persons or groups. Should we cite instances? Genuflecting is a sign of ultimate respect in some culture. In some cultures, it symbolises weakness and defeat. 

Are you aware that men tie wrapper in some cultures? In my culture, men do not. In some cultures when a person dies, anyone who is older should not participate in the funeral. He or she must not show up or eat at the funeral. In some cultures, the parents must be physically present and may even wear "aso-ebi."


Back to the meat of my write-up. The Baba under reference has over the years conditioned his mind to see lads who wear a certain hairdo in a certain light and there is nothing anyone can do about that and for as long as the son stays under his roof, eats his food and spends his money, he just has to comply. But guess what, in some cultures, there is nothing wrong with that hairdo. Even at my age and station in life, there are things I will do in the West and dare not attempt in Africa. Not because I give a hoot about anyone's opinion really, but because I want to have my peace of mind and rest from busybodies and their tongues. That is very important.


You may now ask me, if my son decides to have a similar haircut tomorrow, what would be my reaction?  I can only pray for wisdom in the circumstance. However, let me give you some "expo" (clue). Any day, if I have to choose between substance and form, I will go for substance.


As an individual, just settle for what works for you and try as much as possible to be less judgmental because if you look at yourself and around you critically, you will agree with me that you are not really that perfect. Trust me, you are far from it. I'm in no way near good enough myself.


Thank you for reading.

Its Kunle!