No matter how long a man and a woman date, no matter how many years they live together before marriage, they usually have small issues/disagreements/full blown fights in the first few years of marriage.
However, if there is true love between them, they will sail through this stage.
I thought wify and I were good friends who can never have serious quarrel until we started living under the same roof in marriage.
Initially, we were both stubborn. I was claiming head of the house cum CEO of the marriage who must be obeyed at all times. Wify was claiming business partner who has equal rights too and should not be controlled.
I started noticing some things that I didn't notice when we were dating and also others that were there but I couldn't change them then, I thereafter moved to change them all..
One of them was heavy makeup especially bright red lipsticks. I detested heavy makeup and bright red lipsticks right from when we were dating and I tried to subtly make her stop using them but she refused. I also tried to make her use natural looking colours instead of bright ones, she did sometimes but still loves her bright colours. I therefore decided to stop it after marriage.
In the early part of our marriage, many times we cancelled outings as a result of quarrel caused by makeup. She frankly told me that I saw that she loved her make up and lipsticks before marriage and so I shouldn't try to make her stop now as she loves it.
Overtime, I gave up. I decided to allow her to use her makeup including her bright red lipsticks in peace, mainly because her outings reduced as a result of combining childcare with work and the home. So I allowed her to do her thing on the few occasions in a year that she gets to apply serious make up.
I'm sure she already noticed this, I sneak to her page to steal pictures that she takes while heavily made up and I stare at them and admire them when I'm idle. I also use the pics on my DP on her birthdays. LMAO.
Hahahahahahaha you see yourself? Its just make up and not permanent tattoo..
I think the only weird thing we had to face in the early stage of marriage was the toilet seat thing and toothpaste thing. My husband believes the toilet seat should be kept up and I believe it should be down. After so much back and forth, we just decided to do us.
ReplyDeleteMy husband uses the toilet and leaves the seat up. I want to use it and bring it down and leave it down. He will take it up when next he wants to use it. That’s how it is till today.
My husband believes toothpaste should be pressed from bottom and not just any place. I don’t have that level of organization, I press as the spirit leads. I realised I didn’t like his toothpaste sef so we’ve been using different toothpaste since then. I press mine anyhow, he presses his from the bottom. No issues! No be me say make dem no born me as ajebo
I prefer cl
DeleteI press my toothpaste from bottom too.That middle or from top dey give me temper when I see it.My toilet seat must be down o.
DeleteI even use a different toothpaste now but it’s not like it’s a big deal everyone initially did what they liked.
DeleteThe main issue we had a problem with was playing football, how will I wake up on a Saturday morning and be looking for my hubby, even when we spoke about it before marriage, he agreed to 3times a month but by the time we got married he switched back to factory setting, my sister advised I should let him be, that he will get tired, I never believed it because he loved it so much and will even go when rain fell or public holidays…
My brothers and sisters in the Lord, this man has finally given up and I can’t even remember the last time football was even a conversation 🤣 cus even when he drags his legs to go, I really don’t care that much 🤣
Thinking about it now, so we could ever to get to this stage? What a wow
Push up (original)
It is this trying to change another grown up that always brings problem. I'm sure there are things you do too that she doesn't like. Communication is crucial for a successful Marriage. Couples please talk about everything, I mean everything. It is a lifetime commitment, make it beautiful and enjoyable by discussing every issue you don't like.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is a union between two forgivers - Late Pastor Bimbo Odukoya.
Lol. Understanding is key in any marriage. Me and hubby also argued often in the early part of our marriage but as time went on, we started overlooking some things and we accepted each other as we are.
ReplyDeleteThis toothpaste thing tire me. I had to seek counsel and the couunellor advised I should buy a 2nd tube so I can press it anyhow I like.
ReplyDeleteWhen I made further enquiry, I was told it did matter where you press from as toothpastes now come in rubber like tubes that you can even slit with a sharp object to scoop the remnants.
My husband must wash the sponge he should to bath and the water must remain in the bucket. I don tire I will quietly throw away the dirty water, rinse the bucket fill up with fresh water and do my thing.
It's weird that ordinary pressing of toothpaste can cause argument 😂. This thing called marriage sha.
Delete😀😀😀😀😀😀😀
DeleteMy husband doesn't eat vegetables soups, and in return, I don't eat anything apart from vegetables and native soup which he detest, so cool different soups and freeze. He like super spicy foods, I don't, so I cook his separately. We've been like this for over 17years with zero complain about food. But other foods we can eat without different methods of preparation.
ReplyDeleteWow!
DeleteOur argument back then was on the choices of food to cook. He doesn't like yam, I love yam, he loves bread, I don't like bread as a meal like that. I love akpu, he loves semo instead. I love okra, he doesn't like it, etc.
ReplyDeleteWith time, we found a way around it. For example, since we both love vegetables, I would cook okra soup and add plenty vegetables to it.
Mine is my phone. I can stay all day pressing my phone, but when i have work to do i forget about my phone. He started complaining that i'm addicted to my phone and cant do without my phone even when using the toilet.
ReplyDeleteI told him he knew me with my phone before asking me to marry him, besides he has never come back to a dirty house, the children are taken care of and every other thing i'm soppose to do i foing without him remaining me. So how am i addicted.
Since the complain stopped o
Complaining stopped because maybe he found someone else that’s giving him attention. My husband is also like this. Phone phone phone shaaaa. I don occupy myself with other things and making new friends!
DeleteUnderstanding and respect for each other is what matters most
ReplyDeleteHahahaha, very funny...My husband na team press toothpaste anyhow, me I press from bottom up.i always press the toothpaste bottom up anytime he finishes brushing.The thing I have not stopped complaining about is the way my husband sprays perfume, my goodness, am always angry.he will spray his body, spray his singlet.Wear cloth, then spray the whole cloth, am always angry with this, e remain for am to baff with perfume . I just tire
ReplyDeleteJust always open the windows for proper ventilation
DeleteHmmmmmm
ReplyDelete