Actor Etim Effiong and his wife Toyosi shared their honest thoughts about exes in a recent interview. They spoke openly about how they handle past relationships with respect and understanding.
Here are excerpts from the interview
Etim: Before we got married, you dated a lot of people I dated a lot of people but we didn't end up with them, we ended up with each otherrrrrrr......so do you remain friends with this people or not. When you remain friends with them it leaves the door for other conversations... like "I have a business idea" the question now is do you remain friends with your exes, should you remain friends with them?
Toyosi: hmmmmmm what are your thoughts?
Etim: why not! If it was a wholesome relationship if it wasn't toxic or they were terrible people. Because for me relationships is about relating with other people and if these relationships were healthy relationships why can't you remain friends with them? Just because you didn't end up with them doesn't mean you are now enemies.
Would you have a problem with my exes checking up on me?
Toyosi: what are they looking for first of all.
Etim: my well-being.
Toyosi: it depends on the ex ooooo
Etim: you know all my ex nah
Toyosi: I should be asking you
Etim: no it's you I should be asking because you know all my exes. I feel like I know all your exes like from the day you were born. But do you know all my exes?
Toyosi: there are some names that I will recognize.
Etim: is it okay to keep tabs on each other's exes?
Toyosi: keep tabs, like you, you will be marking my own ex.
Interview with watch transparent
Etim: Before we got married, you dated a lot of people I dated a lot of people but we didn't end up with them, we ended up with each otherrrrrrr......so do you remain friends with this people or not. When you remain friends with them it leaves the door for other conversations... like "I have a business idea" the question now is do you remain friends with your exes, should you remain friends with them?
Toyosi: hmmmmmm what are your thoughts?
Etim: why not! If it was a wholesome relationship if it wasn't toxic or they were terrible people. Because for me relationships is about relating with other people and if these relationships were healthy relationships why can't you remain friends with them? Just because you didn't end up with them doesn't mean you are now enemies.
Would you have a problem with my exes checking up on me?
Toyosi: what are they looking for first of all.
Etim: my well-being.
Toyosi: it depends on the ex ooooo
Etim: you know all my ex nah
Toyosi: I should be asking you
Etim: no it's you I should be asking because you know all my exes. I feel like I know all your exes like from the day you were born. But do you know all my exes?
Toyosi: there are some names that I will recognize.
Etim: is it okay to keep tabs on each other's exes?
Toyosi: keep tabs, like you, you will be marking my own ex.
Interview with watch transparent
As much as it's Ok to be civil with exes, I feel like spouses should move on from their exes.
ReplyDeleteSometimes, reconnection begets unforseen atrocities on the long run. Emphasis on "SOMETIMES". So in order to prevent anything from occuring at all, just stay in your lane
Suits you guys right 🙄
ReplyDeleteI don’t understand the progression of the topic.
ReplyDeleteAre they in an open marriage?
ReplyDeleteMy ex, is my friend and he is willing to go miles for me and whenever I ask, if he was like this with all his exes, he always found it offensive.
ReplyDeleteIt gives me the vibe of someone who wants to be in the good books of every one he has hurt in the past.
I cant imagine what his current girl will be going through.
Their friendship is superb
ReplyDeleteMtchewww
ReplyDeleteThese again! Always trying
ReplyDeleteOur kind of convo, we have a few exes who have added or are still adding value to our marriage. But this conversation is a real test of maturity. Many marriages would collapse if they tried it.
ReplyDeleteI like how Etim and Toyosi handled it - calm, honest, no pretence. That kind of openness takes real courage - and it only works smoothly between open-minded couples who truly trust each other irrevocably with healthy boundaries.
Etim made sense when he said, “If the relationship wasn’t toxic, why can’t you stay friends?” True - not every ex was bad; some things just didn’t work out. But Toyosi’s point was also valid - “it depends on the ex.” Because, let’s be honest, not everyone who checks in does it out of concern. Some just want to see if the door is still open.
In this part of the world, most spouses can’t stomach that level of honesty. Mention an ex and tension will rise immediately. But pretending the past never happened doesn’t make it disappear. What really matters is trust and knowing your limits.
At least these two showed that marriage shouldn’t feel like a cage. If there’s real trust and understanding, conversations like this can strengthen a bond - not destroy it - understanding the type of partner you married is important for this kind of talk. Still, people should be careful not to use “we’re just friends” as a cover for old flames.
It takes the fear and grace of God. Some people come as windows or doors of favour in disguise - yet even the ripest fruit can be rotten inside if one is not careful or discerning.
There are limits to some things in life
ReplyDeleteMao Akuh
Which exes ...I dont have exes just Ys..like Y did I date you in the first place???
ReplyDelete